Antifeminist douchenozzles regularly mock feminists for caring about so-called “first world problems” like “manspreading” and rape and systematic gender discrimination. Unlike those trivia-obsessed feminists, those who’ve taken the Red Pill only concern themselves with momentous questions, like the age of a certain fictional spy dude’s onscreen paramour.
On the Red Pill subreddit, the regulars are up in arms over the news that in the upcoming James Bond film Spectre, the main “Bond Girl” will be a woman more or less Bond’s own age, rather than half of it: current Bond Boy Daniel Craig, 47, will be playing opposite 50-year-old hag lady Monica Bellucci.
I know, right?
In a post with 145 upvotes and 178 comments so far, Bea_OProblem reports sadly that Bond — James Bond — will be “paired with [a] post-wall woman,” the hideous uggo Belluci.
Movie executives have got the memo that pandering to alimony laden post-wall consumers is a lucrative cash cow. In this distinctly blue pill universe, the mysterious and suave international spy wants no one other than a 51 year old woman. Because apparently a mature woman is more alluring than a dozen young pert sluts.
Apparently Bea was so horrified by the news that he added a year to Belucci’s age; Google says she’s 50.
Adding insult to injury, Craig told Esquire magazine that he hopes his Bond won’t be “as sexist and misogynistic” as his predecessors in the role. “The world has changed,” he said.
Red Pillers are not taking the news well. After taking a glance at the picture above, one Red Piller reacted as though he’d seen the dead come to life:
Some thought that Bellucci, only three years Craig’s senior, looked less like his love interest than his mom.
![tillybb 9 points 1 day ago Funny how Daniel looks objectively loads better/healthier/younger when its women who use makeup & spend their days from puberty till the grave trying to look as good as possible. permalinksaveparentreportgive gold [–]Epicureanist 4 points 1 day ago Smoke and mirrors. Castles made of sand. That's all they are. permalinksaveparentreportgive gold [–]nemaxofredpill 5 points 21 hours ago Damn. I thought she looked good until you put her next to Daniel Craig. She looks old enough to be his mom. permalinksaveparentreportgive gold [–]redundanteater 3 points 1 day ago Bond might fuck her in order to get something more valuable (e.g. microfilm, launch codes, introduction to others, plausible cover, etc.), but she can't be a love interest.](https://i0.wp.com/www.wehuntedthemammoth.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/morebond.png?resize=456%2C482&ssl=1)
Others railed at the manginas who enabled this horrible thing to happen:
To be sure, a few brave souls acknowledged that Ms. Bellucci might not be the ugliest old lady they’d ever seen, but they were still having none of it.
In the real world, for what it’s worth, Daniel Craig is married to 45-year-old actress Rachel Weisz. Because, in the real world, not all men are obsessed with “bedding” women young enough to be their daughters.
Many of the assembled Red Pillers tried to convince their comrades that they personally Would Not Bang Ms. Bellucci, except perhaps in conditions of poor lighting.
![cover20 6 points 1 day ago I have lots of respect for her, OK. But that doesn't mean I would want to fuck her. One doesn't fuck a woman out of respect for her, any more than a woman fucks a man because he supplicates to her. permalinkembedsaveparentreportgive gold [–]McLarenX 2 points 1 day ago Of course. But if I had grapefruit balls and she was laying there naked in front of me in dim enough lighting, id hit it.](https://i0.wp.com/www.wehuntedthemammoth.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/grapefruit.png?resize=523%2C214&ssl=1)
Regardless of their personal answer to the WB question, almost all agreed that this was pretty much the end of the world.
I don’t know about you, but Mila Kunis as Rambo sounds kind of awesome to me.
WWTH:
“Too street”.
Hey, did you hear that? Some kind of high-pitched whistle, like maybe for dogs?
Put me down as another who would watch the hell out of Emma Stone as an Indiana Jones-type character (as opposed to Emma Jones being cast to whitewash a character).
As for James Bond, what Daniel Craig is saying is good, and I’d love to see Idris Elba get a chance at the role, but it’s still Bond. Yawn. I want them to start making Velvet Templeton movies. http://www.comicvine.com/velvet-templeton/4005-93303/ Based just how she looks in the books I can see Diane Lane playing her, but I’d also love it if they cast Michelle Yeoh.
Yeah, but you see, all of those women were still young enough to bear the children they don’t want when the movie came out. A 50 year old women just doesn’t have the ability to get pregnant and let them get paper abortions and fuck up her life like younger women do.
I thought they didn’t want Chad Thunder cock to get the girls?
I would certainly appreciate a gay, bi or pan Bond in the next films, for sure. Especially if he outright states his sexuality. Bi/pan much more than gay, TBH.
The comment about looking like his mom really highlights how our culture and representation in the media warps people’s views of what is normal. Two people of approximately the same age in a relationship is normal. Most people I know want to be in a relationship with someone at a similar stage of life because they will have more in common, which usually translates to being approximately the same age. Granted, comments from redpillers aren’t the most reliable, but they believe that it’s normal for men to lust only after much younger women.
And, of course, when women or POC complain about representation in media, these are the same guys who say, “It’s just a movie.” They deny that movies and books and TV shows can change how we think. The media we consume shapes how we view the world and comments like those in the OP highlight what a detrimental effect that can have.
By the way, in the early novels Bond is mid- to late thirties. It’s stated in one of the books that the statutory retirement age for double-0 agents is 45, so presumably in the book timeline Bond is never older than early forties at the most. (I kind of doubt he ever even officially turns forty; the character is designed as a male wish-fulfillment fantasy, so he’s permanently ensconced at the cusp of post-youth/pre-middle-age authority and vigor.)
His sex partners are mostly early to mid-twenties, with maybe one or two around thirty:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bond_girl#In_novels
In the first book he’s initially described as having ongoing sporadic affairs with three different unnamed married women who are never mentioned again. Thereafter, he’s exclusively involved with younger single women.
Middle-aged women in the Bond novels tend to be either malevolent hideous ogresses like Rosa Klebs and Irma Bunt, or else background characters in senior but still subordinate administrative positions in the Service. Elderly people of both sexes are generally presented as appallingly physically repulsive, unless they happen to be authoritative and admired men, like Bond’s boss M, who are described in terms of their actions and thoughts rather than in terms of their unappealing physical characteristics.
However, Fleming himself, though he began his affair with the woman he later married in 1939 when she was 26 and he was 31, didn’t actually marry her till they were both around 40. And for most of his married life he was having affairs, primarily one with a woman a year older than his wife, who also had extramarital relationships (all of which may partly explain why Bond’s adulterous propensities disappeared so abruptly after the first novel). So clearly Fleming himself wasn’t put off by the idea of a middle-aged man being sexually attracted to a middle-aged woman, whatever the illusory James Bond might think of it.
And considering all the liberties the Bond movies take with the plots and characters of the novels, having Craig play a fortysomething Bond who gets involved with a fortysomething hot babe played by a 50-year-old actress is hardly a big deal.
@ Rosa
He’s not particularly ‘endearing’ in the books. He’s actually a bit of a sad character; M calls him his ‘blunt instrument’, not too bright but ok for some of the less important messy jobs. He’s an orphan whose only family was the Navy and then SIS. Moneypenny is the only person who actually ‘likes’ him although his own secretary finds him an OK boss (he pretty much leaves her own devices). M has a bit of a soft spot for him and steps in occasionally when everyone else wants to fire him.
I’d love to see an adaptation of Thunderball, but done purely as in the book; if only for the first line:
Finally, one of them works up the nerve to tell the truth! Always nice to see that red pill doing its real job at last.
BTW, she doesn’t look old enough to be his mother, but young enough to be his daughter. He has wrinkles and grey hair; she doesn’t! What the hell are they kvetching about? Any of them should be so lucky as to look that good at 50, or bag a same-age woman who does…
I would be so incredibly down with that.
I think we’re all missing the bigger picture here, which is that time obviously works differently around Monica Bellucci than other people. Whatever she’s fifty of, it can’t be Earth years.
Semi-related: I know Octopussy and Pussy Galore are supposed to be “Sexy” names, but they just make me picture some sort of vagina shoggoth.
@ Kimstu
It’s probably worth bearing in mind that the women mentioned there are women he has to get involved with as part of his cover, either to obtain information or as in the case of Kissy, as part of his cover.
The few women he actually gets involved with tend to be of his own age. Tiffany might actually be slightly older (she dumps him) and Theresa has been married, had a child who was later died, and then got divorced, so presumably not too young.
I thought that was because of the bullet that was still in his shoulder?
Oh, wow. That’s a completely different angle than the films give him.
?? There are more important jobs than stealing the Soviet Union’s encryption device out of Istanbul
(not Constantinople)?The book Bond’s attitude to gay people is that he “feels sorry for them”. He doesn’t express any hostility towards them but his attitude reflects the times the books were written (although not Ian Fleming’s own view; he had lots of gay friends and the Bond books were edited by a gay man).
Bond is however somewhat sceptical of M’s claim that “gay men can’t whistle”.
Oh wait, it was obviously a trap. Of course you’d send your most expendable agent. I mean, you can’t not go after the device.
This whole thing does bring up this article from Slate that I saw a while back.
I felt it was a bit of a dig at his race, to be honest. But, I’m white, so take that as you will.
Oh, and don’t get me started on Roger Moore, who said he wasn’t “English-English” enough to play Bond.
THIS THIS THIS. I need this so much. (Especially since the only pan character I can think of in anything is Deadpool. :/ )
Sorry, it was the first thing that came to mind.
That, and those vagina dentata monsters from Silent Hill: Homecoming.
@ Falconer
In the book it’s SMERSH that select Bond for the job (by faking Tatiana’s infatuation with him). Bond is considered the most plausible candidate as a target as he’s the only MI6 agent whose cover is known to have been blown to the KGB.
SIS suspect it’s some sort of trap but, as it’s only Bond, it’s worth risking him on the off-chance there’s a real chance of getting a SPEKTOR machine so, against his objections, they order him to go to Istanbul.
@ Falconer
Ah, Ninja’d!
OT: A Cracked article today was about zookeepers and look what one said:
SEE?! Pandas are the most USELESS ANIMALS that even ZOOKEEPERS know how fucking USELESS they are! I swear to fuck, the only reason they’re around is because of capitalism. They’re cute and the merch sells so you keep these evolutionary dead ends around for cash.
This is another reason why capitalism is fucking over the world.
I mean, all the money that has been used to get these shitbears to fuck could have gone to helping tigers, sharks, bats, spiders, insects – animals that actually do shit for the environment instead of eating bamboo and killing eachother.
Fuck pandas! Save Chinese crocodiles!
@Pandapool- how about sturgeons? they’re wicked cool!
Rodger from American Dad is pansexual and states so in the cartoon.
And don’t forget Iron Bull!
@Alpine
Any animal. Literally any animal but pandas deserve life.
@Alan: ISTR that in the movie, SPECTRE wanted to get Bond for killing Dr. No, and take the Lektor for themselves.
@ Falconer
Yeah, SPECTRE was something introduced for the films. That’s quite an interesting story in itself as there’s lots of legal fall out from that (SPECTRE may not have been Fleming’s idea) but in the book it’s SMERSH.
Their plan is basically to set Bond up in a fake sex scandal to discredit SIS.