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consent is hard men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny MRA not-quite-explicit threats rape rape culture rape jokes

This is Rape Culture: That Virginia frat and its terrible banners

They ruined three bedsheets for this?
They ruined three bedsheets for this?

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So the Sigma Nu house at Old Dominion University in Virginia apparently decided last weekend to reinforce the not-exactly-unjustified popular perception that fraternities are basically giant petri dishes for growing rape culture by hanging these lovely banners out for all incoming students to see.

People have already come out of the woodwork to defend the banners as “politically incorrect” humor, as Amanda Marcotte points out on Pandagon, and suggesting that they can’t possibly be referring to rape. She quotes one Washington Post commenter, who claims that while

the signs are crude and dumb … this repulsive habit of charging “rape culture” every time a male mentions sex with a female is even more crude, more dumb, and far more dangerous. There is absolutely nothing in the signs (at least not the ones in the photo above) that even implies non-consensual sex. These lunatics throw around “rape” the way Joe McCarthy flung around “communist” and with just as much concern for truth and justice as he did.

Marcotte, who has encountered more than her share of mansplainy MRA trolls over the years, points out the fundamental bad faith of this “argument.”

Just because the signs imply rather than overtly call for force does not mean they aren’t rape culture. This is how rape culture is, in fact, created: Through winks and nudges, rather than overt calls to force sex on women.

While the banners do not overtly say “rape” on them, the implication is easy enough to see, even for people pretending they don’t see it. …

If you think of consent as something that is freely given and enthusiastic, the coercive element of these signs, which portray women as basically fuckholes who have no say in how they’re used, is staring you right in the face. …

But, of course, that comment shows what rape apologists always do: They suddenly pretend they are aliens from another planet and only learned human language last week and therefore are incapable of picking up on humor, implication, non-verbal communication and nuanced language. They pretend to ascribe to a form of communication so literal that even the slightest bit of metaphor or implication, to hear them talk, sends them spinning into a state of confusion.

Sounds like more than a few MRAs and GamerGaters I’ve encountered in my day. Actually, it sounds like almost all of them.

Happily, the school administrators at Old Dominion University are having none of it, suspending the frat pending an investigation.

Over at Fox News’ Outnumbered show — the one with all the women on it — co-host Harris Faulkner resorted to the old “boys will be boys” argument, saying that

these guys are teenagers and in their twenties and they were probably drunk when they were writing the sign … they’re just having a good time.

Later in the show, after co-host Kennedy Montgomery jokingly suggested she would send her own daughters to a convent to keep them safe, Faulkner declared

I’m going to keep them home in the kitchen.

For anyone playing along at home, this is rape culture too.

 

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Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
9 years ago

@Zeb Berryman

tinyorc was being sarcastic.

Bina
9 years ago

Ugh. Nearly 30 years ago, I went to a university that had abolished frats a few years before. (The reason was a frat party that wound up literally demolishing the house in which it was held.) I thought that might help prevent rape and make the campus safer for female students. Was I ever WRONG! My first day in town, the first sign to greet me was downright rapey: KISS YOUR VIRGINITY GOODBYE. And this was on a student house in the neighborhoods near campus. It didn’t bode well. Neither did the fact that the traditionally sexist hazing rites (which you had to go through to meet your orientation group) were all still firmly in place. The main campus pub was in a basement that you had to get to via a vomit- and piss-smelling concrete stairwell. And of course, rapey chants were a mainstay (not an isolated incident) for students in all faculties.

This banner incident reminded me so much of that, it’s not fucking funny. After all these years, I still can’t laugh…except in mirthless disbelief that anyone is still so idiotic as to believe that this was all just good clean fun. Fuck that noise.

Olive O'Sudden
Olive O'Sudden
9 years ago

Those banners are tantamount to frat boys taking their dicks out of their pants and waving them around.

Zeb Berryman
Zeb Berryman
9 years ago

Ah. It seems my reading comprehension is especially bad today. Apologies to tinyorc for completely missing the point of your post.

Bina
9 years ago

Aaaand I just made myself sick with the realization that rape was not the reason my alma mater abolished frats; property damage was. Priorities: please to unfuck yours.

And now I can’t comment further tonight, at least on this thread. Aaaaagh.

Paradoxical Intention
9 years ago

Nathan Hevenstone | August 25, 2015 at 6:46 pm
I am so pissed at myself for ever being part of a fraternity… *sigh*…

I’m so sorry for ever being a part of this…

At least you realize that shitty behaviors thrive in this kind of environment, and you’ve (hopefully) worked past that.

Nathan Hevenstone
9 years ago

@Paradoxical Intention

At least you realize that shitty behaviors thrive in this kind of environment, and you’ve (hopefully) worked past that.

I was already aware of stuff before joining, but had never connected it with frat shit until after joining.

I will say that my chapter of my frat was actually pretty good for a frat… which, of course, is saying basically nothing, as “good for a frat” still means “generally terrible and shitty, but slightly less terrible and shitty”. My frat did have a reputation on campus as being the “safe” frat because we actually took rape seriously and did the right things if a member was accused (starting with kicking them out and advocating on behalf of the victim if they wanted us to).

But again… we barely met the standard minimum that should be fucking happening, because that’s how low the bar is set. And there was definitely dissent amongst members on how we handled stuff like that (hell… I have two brothers who were in my pledge class who are MRAs, so… yeah). So… I say we were “good for a frat” because, in the end, that’s still pretty fucking bad.

I’d like to see the day when the whole Greek system is torn down. That would be wonderful.

Kestrel
Kestrel
9 years ago

Something needs to change at all these universities. Wasn’t it just last week that that video of guys marching around an Ivy League school chanting “No means yes. Yes means anal”? I was completely oblivious to most of this kind of stuff when I was in college. However, even someone like me who never went to parties knew which frats were “safe” and which were roofie hotspots.

contrapangloss
9 years ago

The only greek lettered organization I ever joined was Pi-Mu-Epislon, which isn’t really a frat or a sorority so much as a bunch of people who get together to geek out over math problems.

Literally. That’s all we did. Geek out over math problems.

…and occasionally have cake. And then more math. All the math.

Our gender ratio actually stayed pretty much 50-50, which is pretty easy when there were only like 4-8 of us at a time, excluding faculty.

I mean, what else are Greek letters for, if not for representing variables and parameters! Right?

contrapangloss
9 years ago

…and yeah, traditional frats and sororities need to go, I think.

They seem kind of a cesspit.

The ‘we use greek letters but we’re really more of a glorified community service/math appreciation society’ ones can stay.

EJ (The Other One)
EJ (The Other One)
9 years ago

Hey contrapangloss, do you know this one:

Indefinite integral of xsinx dx?

contrapangloss
9 years ago

sin(x)-x*cos(x)+C.

It’s cuter if you go from 0 to Pi though…because then it’s Pi!

EJ, if you really want to bug someone, try asking them to find the indefinite integral of e^(x^2) dx.

Especially if they’ve just had calculus.

Offer them 20 bucks if they solve it and show their work.

I dare you.

*I may have done this to people before*

*I may be a little evil*

*sometimes*

*bwahahahaha*

contrapangloss
9 years ago

Also, because it’s late at night, and I’m silly…Math joke for everyone!

What’s the (indefinite) integral of 1/cabin bcabin?

.
.
.
.
.

A LOG CABIN!

🙂

I’ll just show myself the door…

contrapangloss
9 years ago

…Imagine the b is a d.

…Whoops.

EJ (The Other One)
EJ (The Other One)
9 years ago

Nope, it’s a houseboat. You forgot to add the C.

I’ll join you outside.

steampunked (@steampunked)

Man, if I had a frat next to them, the temptation would be to have a sign up saying:

‘Don’t want to hang out with assholes? Try us!’

Or some variant.

skiriki
9 years ago

@GiJoel: my only surprise was that it wasn’t Clark posting it.

Moggie
Moggie
9 years ago

Would anything of value be lost if all frats were abolished? Most of the rest of the world manages perfectly ok without them.

Moggie
Moggie
9 years ago

I work in a university, and there have been graduation ceremonies taking place the past few days. On my way to my office, I have to navigate through crowds of fresh graduates in gowns and mortar boards, attended by proud parents all dressed up. It’s rather sweet, and makes me feel proud that, in my own small way, I’m helping to make that reality. And then I see shit like these strutting peens with their boastful threats, and it tarnishes that shine.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
9 years ago

What do folks think about this?

One candidate for leadership of the Labour party here has said if elected he’ll have a consultation about women only tube carriages. The 2 women candidates have said it’s a terrible idea.

http://www.theguardian.com/politics/2015/aug/26/jeremy-corbyn-backlash-women-only-train-carriages-cooper-kendall

Broken Butterfly
Broken Butterfly
9 years ago

comment image

Um……………………………………….

I am suddenly so very glad I got out of college long ago.

skiriki
9 years ago

Terrible idea, because that means women in mixed carriages are seen as free game, and “why did you go there, there are women-only places where you’re safe” blame game when it should be safe anywhere.

Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
9 years ago

Yeah, I get that the guy’s heart was in the right place (which makes a nice change), but it’d just put yet another onus on women instead of on predatory men, with a heaping helping of “Separate but equal” on top.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
9 years ago

He’s actually not keen on the idea himself, he says he prefers just trying to makes things safer for women generally. He was however approached by some women’s groups suggesting the idea so he said he’d have a consultation on the idea if elected.

To put it in context though, he’s so ruffled the feathers of the other candidates that if he suggested a consultation on policing they’d be arguing “No, no. Black people like being shot”

Ellesar
Ellesar
9 years ago

Alan – can’t help feeling that some of the opposition is more to do with the current Corbyn smear than the actual proposal.

At night, when there was a choice due to more space, often women self selected to go in carriages with other women – I used to see them gravitating towards me all the time! I wasn’t too fussed as I didn’t get too much hassle on the tube, strange really as I got loads elsewhere.

I don’t see any harm in a consultation on the idea, but practically it seems unrealistic.