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entitlement misogyny patriarchy

Alleged murderer of eight in Houston explains “I’m not God, but you know, I’m the man of the house.”

Four of the murdered children
Four of the victims

Last Saturday, police say, a 48-year-old Houston man named David Conley climbed in a window of the house where his ex-girlfriend lived with her husband and six kids. Using rope, and handcuffs he’d bought a few days earlier, he restrained the entire family. He then shot them all, one by one, starting with his ex-girlfriend’s husband, and ending with her.

Police took Conley into custody after an hour-long standoff.

Why hasn’t this horrific case of mass murder gotten the media attention that other mass shootings have gotten? Possibly because seven of the eight victims were black.

And possibly because, well, cases of men murdering their families are so common that they barely make the national news any more — even when the men in question kill more people than many much-better known mass murderers.

Someone shooting random people in a theater or a mall — that’s news. Men killing their exes and their children? That’s just part of the background noise.

Conley has reportedly confessed to everything, telling police in detail how he planned and carried out the eight murders. He has a long history of violence, having served five years in jail for a previous attack on his on-again-off-again girlfriend, Valerie Jackson.

In a series of jailhouse interviews, he’s been a bit more cagey on the question of guilt. But he’s been a lot less shy in discussing the motives for the murders he won’t publicly admit to.

He seems to have murdered eight people because Valerie wasn’t raising her children the way he wanted them raised. (Never mind that he was an on-again, off-again father as well as an on-again, off-again boyfriend, and that only one of the six children was his.)

And he was angry at her for “cheating” on him — with her husband.

The children “were growing up to be monsters, they were disrespectful,” Conley complained to one local TV reporter. “I’m not saying they’re dead because of that. I’m not even saying I killed them.”

“The Bible says, ‘Thou shall respect your mother and father or your days shall be short,” he told the Houston Chronicle. “I’m not God, but you know, then, I’m the man of the house.”

Let that sink in for a second:

“I’m not God, but you know, then, I’m the man of the house.”

At the time of the murders, of course, Valerie’s husband, Dwayne Jackson, was the “man of the house.” But Conley felt that Dwayne, the father of five of the six children, was somehow usurping his own rightful authority.

“He tried to pimp out over me and take everything, rule over my house.” he complained to one local TV reporter. “How would you feel?”

But it seems pretty clear that his most virulent anger was aimed at Valerie. He blamed the alleged bad behavior of the children — particularly his son Nate — on her.

“Nate didn’t give me any respect because of what his mother was doing to me,” he told the TV reporter. “She was cheating on me.”

Conley apparently made her pay for this “disrespect,” killing her last, after forcing her to witness the murder of her husband and her six children.

Yet he seems to think he’s the victim here — disrespected by his children, his authority as “man of the house” usurped by another man, and “cheated” on by a woman he had previously beaten and repeatedly left. When he asked a reporter “how would you feel,” he apparently assumed the reporter would feel some sympathy for him.

This is toxic masculinity at its worst.

 

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Selt
Selt
5 years ago

Uh.

Damn.

That’s-that’s just sick. In so many ways, that is one of the most disgusting things I’ve ever heard.

C.S.Strowbridge
C.S.Strowbridge
5 years ago

“This is toxic masculinity at its worst.”

It’s beyond time to treat people who spread toxic masculinity as hate groups. That includes MRA, PUAs, etc.

Aunt Edna
Aunt Edna
5 years ago

Well done, David.

Don’t know about the reporter, but I’m certain redpillians sympathize with Conley. An alpha man’s gotta do what an alpha man’s gotta do.

Falconer
5 years ago

I am so, so sad for the victims.

Flora
Flora
5 years ago

Those poor children. That poor woman. I can’t believe anyone could be so vile, and yet…

andiexist
andiexist
5 years ago

That is vile. The sheer, toxic entitlement…

Leela
Leela
5 years ago

jesus.
I posted not too long ago this link : http://www.gannett-cdn.com/GDContent/mass-killings/index.html#title

Basically a mass murder is a murder of 4 or more. The vast majority of cases are of men killing their families. Usually using a gun.

And no one fucking cares.

Bazia
Bazia
5 years ago

Thank you for this, David. So many of the themes of toxic masculinity are here; the “disrespect” motive is a big one. I would like to recommend James Gilligan’s book, “Violence” for its analysis of murder based on this motive. The intensity of the killer’s hatred for a woman who left him is here too, with the incredible torture of watching him murder her children, not only his own child but five other little children. Dr. Gilligan says that the combination of men who have no social roles or standing, the availability of weapons of mass destruction (guns), a competitive culture that despises non-achievers, toxic religious beliefs, the misery of racism and poverty, and the sexist belief that women are possessions of men, add up to murders like these.

As you say murders like these are so common they don’t receive media attention, I think also because they are disgraceful testimonies to the failings of our culture. The mainstream isn’t willing to change the culture of poverty, racism, and sexism, so we tolerate this ongoing “collateral damage”. Feminists are right to point out that the scapegoat for these failings, the focus of hatred, is more often than not a woman who has “left” a man.

I don’t think it’s enough any more for women with abusive ex-partners to get useless restraining orders, to wait with terror for their assault, to flee and live underground. I don’t know the solution except to say that if these men are free to arm themselves to kill, ex-partners may have to arm themselves too. I know as a woman I have been socialized not to fight back, told I am peaceful and non-aggressive, but that sure does seem like a setup to me right now.

Naomi Campbell
Naomi Campbell
5 years ago

This has made me cry. Just that.

AAAtheist
5 years ago

Family annihilators make my physically ill.  : – (

And David Conley could only legitimately claim his son as “family” after his ex-wife divorced his useless ass.  Too bad Nate didn’t live long enough to thoroughly ostracize his father and cut him out of his life completely.

level14boss
level14boss
5 years ago

Even though this horrible man used religion as an excuse for this vile act I sincerely hope that if the families of the victims are religious it brings them at least some comfort.

As for the victim blaming. If you do this you are a horrible person.

Bazia
Bazia
5 years ago

Hi Leela, thanks for reposting that chilling information on mass killings. 94% were by men. This HAS to be addressed.

kupo
kupo
5 years ago

Wow, how do these people in the comments get such superiority complexes?

What is never mentioned in these large family killings is the parents involved are the least qualified to have even one child and here there were six. Definitely someone in the encounters with law and medical agencies should have been telling them to not have more children and how to not have more children. A reference to Planned Parenthood might have saved additional children and strains on these people.

That’s just messed up. What on Earth makes that asshole think that anyone other than the suspect wasn’t a fit parent?

lkeke35
5 years ago

I got nothing. This shit speaks entirely for itself,

I bet the media is acting confused about his motives,as the usually do, as none of them ever seem to want to mention The “M” word.

Aunt Edna
Aunt Edna
5 years ago

David, blaming the woman is a given. Toxic masculinity and its results are always the women’s fault. ITAWF (It’s Always Women’s Fault) is the motto of the manuresphere, as well as much of the male-dominated world.

I’m just waiting for Dalrock to choose Valerie Jackson are the next subject of his Vile Women Who Bring Misfortune On Innocent Men series (his blog is nothing but).

Aunt Edna
Aunt Edna
5 years ago

@Leela:

Basically a mass murder is a murder of 4 or more. The vast majority of cases are of men killing their families. Usually using a gun.

And no one fucking cares.

Right. Because it is somehow completely understandable* that a man who gets angry over some big or little, real or imagined, blow to his ego (which is also completely understandable) explodes at others, often killing them. It is completely understandable that his family, who may be the source of those ego blows or augment them somehow, would be a natural target. Nothing to see here, move along.

And the a*holes of the manuresphere blather on about the injustice of VAWA.

*Sarcasm.

Ælfscýne
Ælfscýne
5 years ago

Again, nothing proves that you are indeed an upstanding person, partner and father more than killing your ex, her husband and all the children, including your own.
I just can’t.

freemage
5 years ago

Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck! From one of the news stories:

http://www.washingtonpost.com/news/morning-mix/wp/2015/08/10/accused-texas-shooter-david-conley-had-troubled-past-with-victim/

The years of mounting tension between Valerie Jackson and Conley came to a head last month when Conley went after her 10-year-old son with a belt. She told police that when she tried to grab it, he shoved her head into the refrigerator, according to the Houston Chronicle. Police issued an arrest warrant.

Soon after, Jackson changed the locks at the house.

Early Saturday morning, Conley told police, he noticed Jackson had locked him out, so he found an unlocked window and climbed inside. At some point that morning, Yanske, who was in Montana, heard that Conley was in the home — and armed. Family members called police in Houston and urged them to check on Jackson and her family, according to the Houston Chronicle.

Deputies went to the home that morning, but nothing seemed unusual. They went back that afternoon but did not have enough information to force their way inside. When they returned that night, they saw a body through the window.

“Deputies on scene forced entry into the home and were immediately met with gunfire,” Cannon said, according to the Associated Press. “The deputies withdrew from the home.”

So the cops had been notified that an armed man, for whom they had a fucking arrest warrant, was in the home of his ex-girlfriend with a weapon, and they say they can’t enter the home forcibly on two separate visits? In fucking TEXAS? I smell bullshit, piled to the moon.

I suspect that the home was known to the cops as a frequent call-spot. So they probably figured this was just more of the same, and didn’t want to bother. I am livid at the notion that some of those children, or their mother, might still have been alive during one or both of those visits, and the cops did NOTHING.

Fnoicby
Fnoicby
5 years ago

Cherchez la femme, amirite?

Ellesar
Ellesar
5 years ago

I don’t believe in evil, in the religious sense, but this is an act of pure evil. His sense of entitlement seeps from every pore – the Manosphere will deify him, or at least they would if he were white.

weirwoodtreehugger
5 years ago

As I’ve been following this story, I’ve been wondering if this would be a MRA hero because he shares their attitudes toward women. Or if they’ll just let their racism take over and shrug it off as a black man being a thug.

katz
katz
5 years ago

I can’t. I just can’t. I’ll be in the other thread.

davidknewton
davidknewton
5 years ago

“The Bible says, ‘Thou shall respect your mother and father or your days shall be short,”

THOU SHALT NOT KILL

The justifications these people make are… incredible, in the worst possible way.

benfromcanada
5 years ago

I want to vomit.

Rosemary
Rosemary
5 years ago

Wow. I frequently hear MRAs complaining about the Duluth Model of domestic violence, but this is one example of why understanding how male privilege/entitlement leads to violence is so necessary. What a devastating tragedy, that happens shockingly often.

alaisvex
alaisvex
5 years ago

This is too horrifying for words. Thank you, David, for bringing it to everyone’s attention. It’s important not to overlook the dangers of toxic masculinity

Alex
Alex
5 years ago

If you will excuse me, I going to puke my guts out after I scream in rage and sadness for the victims.

WHY DOES THIS BULLSHIT KEEPS HAPPENING? WHY?

sn0rkmaiden
5 years ago

I’ve been avoiding reading about this story because it’s unbearable to comprehend the suffering and anguish of that family. It reminded me of the man last year who tied up and shot a family of five because the mother was the sister of his estranged wife (he couldn’t get to her so he targeted them), at least in that instance one child survived.

I do wonder if race comes into the reporting? His being black doesn’t fit the common trope, usually it’s angry white men who wipe out families.

I recently had a run in with an MRA who was claiming the Duluth Model helped to ruin his life, needless to say he was TOTALLY innocent of all charges brought against him. I’d have more time for MRAs if they concentrated more on helping male victims of violence and less time defending the perpetrators.

ColeYote
ColeYote
5 years ago

> He has a long history of violence, having served five years in jail for a previous attack on his on-again-off-again girlfriend,

Totally don’t have a gun problem in the US, though! Domestic abusers got the same right deadly weapons everyone else does!

indifferentsky
5 years ago

Rosemary- Any legal model of anything that recognizes men as dangerous entitled privileged abusers is shocking for people to take no matter what the stats are, the personal accounts, the dead body count, slavery count, doesn’t matter.

Some men are exasperated that such a thing as an Ex Parte protective order exists, because it suspends their constitutional rights temporarily (arguable). Well these laws and means are only in place because of the dead body count, because of what horrible MEN have done. The “bias” in the system is a recognition of facts, not feminists.

indifferentsky
5 years ago

Actually Cole, those with convictions of domestic violence are not supposed to have fire arms. Just fyi.

ColeYote
ColeYote
5 years ago

@indifferentsky: Okay, maybe I was a little mistaken, but per wikipedia “In Texas a convicted felon may possess a firearm in the residence in which he lives once five years have elapsed from his release from prison or parole, whichever is later.”

Besides which, they only do background checks when issuing carry licenses.

indifferentsky
5 years ago

Yeah that stinks. The DV law is federal and state though but when there are guns everywhere… I don’t think it’s that hard to get one. The laws are in place but the genie is out of the bottle. 🙁

Iogrey
Iogrey
5 years ago

I have personally known three different people from different families whose father killed their mother when they were children. One just left her slumping in a chair, dead, while his 8 y/o triplets were asleep. He left her for the kids to find in the morning. I’m right now in a situation where I am terrified to date anyone because I think my ex would try to kill them – or me.

Paradoxical Intention
5 years ago

indifferentsky | August 13, 2015 at 12:44 pm
Actually Cole, those with convictions of domestic violence are not supposed to have fire arms. Just fyi.

That may be true, but it obviously didn’t stop this guy from getting a hold of one.

Kind of reminds me of this tweet I saw:

https://twitter.com/blunderingidiom/status/628469905038438401

Paradoxical Intention
5 years ago

Iogrey | August 13, 2015 at 1:00 pm
I have personally known three different people from different families whose father killed their mother when they were children. One just left her slumping in a chair, dead, while his 8 y/o triplets were asleep. He left her for the kids to find in the morning. I’m right now in a situation where I am terrified to date anyone because I think my ex would try to kill them – or me.

And yet, MRAs think it’s misandry for women to be afraid of men.

A woman’s chances of getting killed or attacked by a man are MUCH higher than being attacked by a shark, but being afraid of sharks is normal while being afraid of men is considered to be “reverse sexism”.

I’m so fucking angry right now. I’m gonna go play Minecraft and just…try to forget.

katz
katz
5 years ago

I’m right now in a situation where I am terrified to date anyone because I think my ex would try to kill them – or me.

Oh no, do you have a violent ex? I hope you’re safely away from them.

J
J
5 years ago

This is so awful. I’m surprised they caught him alive.

Aunt Edna
Aunt Edna
5 years ago

@Rosemary, snork, et al:

The Duluth Model of domestic violence = how feminism destroyed American families, in MRA’s eyes. It took normal masculine behaviors and labeled them as abusive, planting the idea in women’s mind that their manly husbands, who only had their best interest in mind, were abusing them. And women, who are herd- and hamster-driven mindless bots, bought into that destructive idea, as they are wont to do.

In MRA’s eyes, what Conley did is a natural consequence of good men being ripped away from their families and rendered helpless as husbands and fathers — i.e., rightful family owners — by the evil forces of feminism and progressivism in general, and evil women following their gina tingles in particular.

If only Valerie submitted to Conley’s headship, instead of rebelling against it and pursuing her sexual pleasure (read: an opportunity for a safe and happy life for herself and her kids, for a change — but never mind small distinctions), he would not have been forced to assert his rights in this way. Ergo, her fault. It is always HER fault, in MRA and their ilk’s eyes.

Aunt Edna
Aunt Edna
5 years ago

@Paradoxical Intention:

A woman’s chances of getting killed or attacked by a man are MUCH higher than being attacked by a shark, but being afraid of sharks is normal while being afraid of men is considered to be “reverse sexism”.

Great point.

Johanna Roberts
5 years ago

Near tears reading this. My thoughts and prayers are with the family of the victims and the victims themselves. The man who did this deserves to spend the rest of his life locked away in prison where he hopefully won’t hurt another living soul.

It really makes me sick that some people bend over backwards to make this t he woman’s fault.

Iogrey
Iogrey
5 years ago

I’m not really. We have kids together. He hasn’t been violent since I left seven years ago, but some men seem to think that once you have a child with them, you can never be with any other man.

rugbyyogi
5 years ago

‘A woman’s chances of getting killed or attacked by a man are MUCH higher than being attacked by a shark, but being afraid of sharks is normal while being afraid of men is considered to be “reverse sexism”.’

OK, yeah, but your chances of being killed crossing the road or driving a car are also much higher and we don’t (mostly) live in fear of those things, either. For example, US women who die aged 20-24 are about 5 times more likely to been killed by an ‘unintentional injury’ than to be murdered. That stat must include road traffic accidents, though also presumably shark attacks.

We get used to dangers we live with, because we have to. We exaggerate certain risks like terrorism (in the West) or sharks, which are non-zero, really low, but big in our imaginations.

ryohji
ryohji
5 years ago

This, this makes me sick. Fuck! What is wrong with this world? Fuck!

cupisnique
5 years ago

@rugbyyogi

There’s obviously certain acceptable risks to our safety that we must deal with to participate in society. But I’m not sure what your point is to compare those with a woman’s chance of being murdered which really should never be an acceptable risk. And even where there is higher risk of bodily harm, like driving a car or walking across the street, as a society we do a lot of things to minimize those risks to ourselves and others, but when it comes to women being murdered by their ex or current partners we seem to think there is nothing we can do to minimize that.

epitome of incomprehensibility

That’s horrible news.

I was just listening to part of a radio program yesterday where they were talking about family violence and shelters. They cited some depressing info that among domestic violence murders, many women (specifically) are killed by their partners after they leave. One of the speakers said she didn’t want to discourage people from leaving abusive relationships, but to make sure they do so as safely as they can.

But there isn’t always that safety available. Other callers noted that shelters can be harder to find for transwomen, people who have disabilities, and people who have children with them (I suppose also for people who are ethnic minorities or who don’t speak the dominant language, but they didn’t mention that).

epitome of incomprehensibility

@logrey – I’m so sorry about that and I’m glad you’re in a safer place. The idea that people can “own” others or be entitled to them needs to stop.

Cyberwulf
Cyberwulf
5 years ago

If he was in fucking jail for assaulting his girlfriend this wouldn’t have happened.

J^3 (@JoeKlemmer)
5 years ago

WRT why there’s little coverage of it, is Conley black? In addition to the reasons Dave said, the media isn’t interested in so called “black on black violence.” It doesn’t sell as well.