Today, another little treasure from the trash pile — that is, a comment someone left here but that I decided not to let through but which I have since decided might be worth sharing with the world.
This particular commenter — an excitable Man Going His Own Way reacting to my post Women are overpriced vagina buses that won’t let you ride them — has a bit of a fixation on a certain word that starts with “C,” which he managed to use 14 times in his tl;dr rant.
I’ve taken the liberty of cutting out boring stuff, breaking up his wall of text into paragraphs, and highlighting some of my favorite bits. And, in the interest of making the world a slightly nicer place, I’ve replaced each instance of the word “cunt” with “bundt cake.” Who doesn’t like cake?
Let’s see what Poltergeist1981 has to say, shall we?
Wow – look at all the bundt cake-hurt on this comment section! Nothing but baseless statements, Strawmen, and a myriad of other logical fallacies combined with emotional trauma. Not amazed or surprised through, bundt cakes hate it when you call them out on their bundt cake bullshit, especially if they are biased feminazi bundt cakes. …
Damn. I’m hungry already.
What are the feminists doing now? Complaining about how men sit? Man Spreading they call it? Give me a fucking break you bundt cakes – we have something in between our legs that makes it uncomfortable to sit like you do! It’s too bad you can’t grow a cock and pair of balls to understand that, but none the less what a pathetic fucking group it has become.
Ah, manspreading. If what I’ve seen is any indication, the overwhelming majority of the talk about “manspreading” has come from men who are absolutely furious that anyone could possibly suggest that maybe they shouldn’t take up more than one seat on a crowded subway. With all the talk about the possible harm to their allegedly HUGE BALLS, it’s almost as though they’re afraid of some sort of symbolic castration.
Angry dudes: some people with cocks and balls as big as yours manage do this on a regular basis — in part to avoid getting harassed or worse by transphobes — so quit your bellyaching about having to keep your legs together for a few minutes on the subway.
Feminists need to fuck off about the first world – you have more than your fair share of human rights (way more than men now) – and need to start focusing on the middle east where they still force bundt cakes to wear burkas or however / whatever you call them.
Spoken like a real expert on gender in the Middle East. Are you by chance Richard Dawkins?
Do they really focus on that though? No – they focus on bullshit like man-spreading. You want to know why? Because first world bundt cakes are superficial – idiotic – and are only good for what is between their legs, and half of you aren’t even good for that now – fucking STD infected land whales.
Uh, if these “land whales” aren’t even “good for” sex now, how is it that so many of them (at least in your imagination) have managed to get Sexually Transmitted Diseases?
Put the fork fucking down and close your fucking legs.
I would say “or” rather than “and” here. Nothing wrong with forks, or with sex, but combining the two may not be the best idea. You could put an eye out.
[A]ll you bundt cake are so extremely superficial, fucked up, nasty, no morals, can’t fucking cook, can’t fucking clean, just overall good for nothing, and you’re only good for sex assuming your bundt cake is clean and you’re not a fucking whale.
True, a clean bundt cake is preferable to a dirty one.
[I]t’s not that we can’t get laid – it’s because we just don’t want it from you anymore – it’s not worth our trouble.
I get more enjoyment from fucking a fleshlight to my favorite porn now than going through the trouble of being with some boring good for nothing / nasty / etc bundt cake to then eventually bust a nut with.
That poor, poor Fleshlight.
Also why would I or any of us want to have a “deep / intimate / close” relationship with you? You are not interesting, fun, uplifting, or anything what women USED to be back during the days where traditional conservative women were the norm.
I’m sure women who were systematically denied education were much more interesting conversationalists.
You say that “patriarchy” forced them to be that way when really, they simply just had more class than you.
Uh, that’s not how things work.
Myself? 32 yrs old, Never married – 0 kids – make over 100k / year doing java programming, 0 STDs, Great body work out every day, Near perfect credit, awesome house, Ferrari (not an expensive one a modest one I got for a great price :D), and a PC master race gaming habit i’ll never leave.
Gosh, an angry MGTOW who’s a computer programmer and gaming enthusiast who thinks it’s hilarious to refer to himself as part of the “master race.” Way to dismantle the stereotypes, dude!
I love my life. Why should I fuck it up with marriage.
I’ll agree with you on this one. Do not fuck up your life — or, more to the point, anyone else’s — by getting married
I look at things like an economic transaction when it comes to women.
Boy, there’s a shock.
When you consider myself – the value I have will continue to grow as I get older – i’ll continue you make more and more money, and increase my market value.
Now take a woman – when it comes to most of you the only thing you’re really only good for is what is between your legs and your looks. That is what I consider a depreciating asset since eventually your looks will fade. Why should I have to MARRY you? No what I will do though – I will lease you. When our contract is up – I’ll replace you with a newer model.
Wait, weren’t you just declaring that women are worthless, and singing the praises of your Fleshlight? And now you’re bragging about “leasing” young hotties with your Java money? Money that could be spent on Steam, or on a replacement Fleshlight? You’re going your own way SO HARD that you brag about bribing women into having sex with you?
You ask who will take care of me when I get sick? My new model or you if you have not depreciated enough to be replaced at such a time. I will ALWAYS have a replacement..
Yes, keep telling yourself that.
Now if I found a woman that actually has many values / morals / etc that is worth keeping around – EVEN THEN – I would still not marry her. Why? Because a woman like that probably ALREADY has a job that pays really well, she can take care of herself, she does not need my money – she would be seeing me because we have mutual interests and SHE IS INTERESTING and not superficial –
I shudder at the thought of a women who has “mutual interests” with you, given that your main interest seems to be calling women “cunts” on the internet.
BUT SHE HAS ALL THIS MONEY??!?! So why should I risk losing HALF OF MY SHIT to a woman who is making as much IF NOT MORE money as myself? Where is the logic in that shit?
We don’t care if you don’t marry. I’d much prefer you didn’t.
Honestly until the laws that fuck guys financially GO AWAY from drivoces go the way of the dinosaur – MGTOW 4 fucking life. Fuck that shit.
And now we’ve reached the part of the rant in which the ranter descends into gibbering incoherence.
I would like to ask some of you bundt cakes. Is your pussy worth my life? Is it? I seriously fucking doubt it – and to the those who say Yes – it is – fuck off and die – you are what is wrong with the world and women today mmmkaY? kkthxbai
MGTOW 4 life, bundt cakes.
Bundt cake for life, MGTOWs!
@autosoma
That was me jumping the gun there then. Sorry.
alaisvex:
I think he’s invested so heavily in the MRA propaganda that he genuinely believes women just plain get preferential treatment in all things. Somehow the courts are going to decide that as a man he should support the poor helpless woman that earns twice what he does. Yeah right.
“Myself? 32 yrs old, Never married – 0 kids – make over 100k / year doing java programming, 0 STDs, Great body work out every day, Near perfect credit, awesome house, Ferrari (not an expensive one a modest one I got for a great price :D), and a PC master race gaming habit i’ll never leave.”
uuuuuhhhhhh no. Serious bullshit aleart. If this guy got any of these that he earns of “java programming” then im Jesus H. Christ himself.
Which im not. So you get the point.
“BUT SHE HAS ALL THIS MONEY??!?! So why should I risk losing HALF OF MY SHIT to a woman who is making as much IF NOT MORE money as myself? Where is the logic in that shit?”
Where is the logic in anything this guy is saying?
@john
FINALLY. Are you actually going to stick the flounce this time?
Good-bye john, please never interact with a woman again, that would be best for everyone.
My mother didn’t take care of anything thats why the state took her kids. I was fifteen and decided that living on the streets was better than living with an abusive and drug addicted parent. So keep acting like you know something when you don’t know how deep the rabbit hole goes.
@SFHC
Regarding the spreading thing, somebody has probably already answered this but it’s not really about the dick size rather the balls. When you sit with your legs crossed your balls can get kinda mashed. Never been a problem for me (for reasons) but it seems to bother dude enough to get all emotional and illogical about it.
And of course he hasn’t fucked off after all.
And none of that justifies you being a horrible human being. I realize you’re completely lacking in sense, but how about you “go your own way”?.
@John:
Regardless of who the person is, the actions of one person are not the actions of everyone with only one single thing in common, and then only by accident of birth. And if it does then why something as arbitrary as gender? Why not eyebrow style or ear lobe size? Surely they’re just as relevant?
“I’m going to make all slightly arched with the peak more towards the nose eyebrow people pay for what someone with that style did”.
See, they’re not a group in cahoots against anyone any more than ‘womkind’. They’re just people.
sunnysombrera:
Good luck with the jobs, I’m sure it’ll work out well whichever you take.
Oh goody, a new troll! Teal Deer incoming so I can play ketchup.
http://i.imgur.com/PyoCK.jpg
Yup, because when I meet a “real man”, I bury my nose right up his ass so I can tell who he is and where he’s been.
I was raised by articulate wolves.
(I joke, but my grandma’s maiden name was “Wolfe”, so there’s that. XD)
I’m not “real”? Holy shit, I’m a figment of people’s imaginations! I can do whatever I want with no repercussions! I can pants world leaders during speeches! I can have all the chocolate bars I want! I can give Paul Elam a wedgie!
THE WORLD IS MINE!
http://media.giphy.com/media/hkik4ac9sSqaY/giphy.gif
My hand-me-downs what? All my hand-me-downs went to my little sister. And even those were hand-me-downs from thrift stores and other people. My family was pretty poor when I was a kid. Still kind of is.
Okay, serious face for a moment: If you’re not sexually interested in vaginas, it’s okay.
That’s a legitimate thing to not want. You could be homosexual, or even asexual. Those are both okay too.
You might want to look into those communities if you have questions about your sexuality. I’m just going to say that The Red Pill doesn’t do much for people who aren’t sexually attracted to vaginas, but it is feeding you some toxic bullshit about your own masculinity, bruh. You don’t need to have sex to be considered a “real man”, you don’t need a notch on your bedpost, you just should do what makes you happy, as long as it doesn’t bring harm (or in this case, annoyed bemusement) to anyone else, alright?
Whelp, back to the mockery!
Yup, you clearly don’t give any fucks, Mr. I’m-Going-To-Go-to-a-Feminist-Blog-and-Tell-Those-Icky-Girls-how-Much-I-Hate-Them-and-Their-Vaginas.
Clearly you don’t know the meaning of the word “indifference”.
Did…did you just assume we haven’t seen The Dark Knight? Or that we don’t know who The Joker is? Or anything else about the Batman universe?
Oh, and nice use of over-used quotes. You sure got us! [/sarcasm]
http://i.imgur.com/fUTsylD.png
Well aren’t you just adorable.
http://images.viralnova.com/000/118/219/340×252-1424201277.jpg
Yeah, because MGTOWs totally aren’t “going their own way” because they’re mad evil feeemales won’t put out and let them have our delicious bunt cakes!
Yup, we don’t want you here because you’re so fucking alpha that our insults have no effect on you. Yup, I totally buy that. [/sarcasm]
Whelp, my biological father (Who actually ditched my mother and I when she was pregnant with me because it was discovered I was going to be born with a vagina) and my abusive step-father are the reason why I don’t care for MGTOW or misogynists in general. And it used to be that I didn’t care for men for the longest time either. Still kind of don’t, to be honest.
And yet, I still managed to turn out to be a decent human being. Fancy that. It’s almost like abuse/mental illness doesn’t excuse being a shitty person. [/sarcasm]
I went through this exact phase in high school, bruh. I thought I was a badass emo kid and I could take on the world and they’d all just have to live with me and my nasty attitude because fuck them, that’s why. And then I grew up a little, realized that it was just a front for my own inadequate feelings, learned how to deal with said inadequate feelings somewhat, and moved the fuck on.
Also, if you have to say that you’re “a jackass”, I have to admit I don’t believe you. I feel like you’re exaggerating. Like when I say “I can be a bit of a bitch/sarcastic motherfucker/asshole/etc.”, I’m not saying I am those things all the time, just like some of the time. And I’m certainly not that way to “feel better about myself”, I’m just that way when I get annoyed or upset. (Though, the sarcasm’s almost my default setting, if I’m being honest.)
Though, admitting you have shitty behaviors is the first step to correcting them. Here’s hoping you live long enough and well enough to see you to the end of these things.
That’s sad.
And hilariously ironic, considering how you’re trying to make us feel sorry for you with the whole bit about how terrible your mother was.
Like you’re trying to make all women apologize for her misdeeds. That’s something you need to take up with her and possibly a therapist, not us.
That was your point? I couldn’t see it through the bullshit about gyms and how terrible your mother was, apparently.
Also, shame on us feeemales for hating people who actively hate them for having vaginas and not letting them put their dicks in them.
We’re such terrible people for hating people who treat us like shit, surely. [/sarcasm]
“Yeah?! OH YEAH?! Well, I WANTED you to punch me in the face! I’m so used to it! C’mon, hit me harder!”
There’s people you can see for that, if that’s what gets your rocks off, John. You can even find them over the internet and do webcam or even just IM with them if you’re uncomfortable with talking/being on camera!
Not jumping to apologize for his mother’s awfulness = applauding her for beating the shit out of her child.
Wow. What a piece of work you fucking are. And you wouldn’t happen to be planning to pay “all womkind” back by just going your own fucking way already, would you?
If it’s a violent thing instead, whelp, I agree with Jackie.
It does when they’re putting thinly-veiled threats about “making womankind pay” for some contrived bullshit because we don’t think it’s our place to apologize for other women being shitty to you.
And another threat! “If you tell on me, I’m going to make it even worse!”
You know who pulled that shit? My abusive step-father to keep me from telling anyone how he was sneaking into my room at night. And yet, I still don’t think it’s “men’s fault” that my step-father is a rancid bag of garbage, just his. And he’s fucking paying for it, because his ass is in prison.
Fuck you, and fuck off. I am not scared of you, nor will I be bullied into silence by your vague threats of harm.
Wait, the state took her kids, but you left before that happened or what?
And yeah, you keep telling us how awful women have made your life, because we’re still not going to apologize for shit we didn’t fucking do. Women are not the cause of your hurt, your mother specifically is. Go to therapy, go find someone to talk to who you haven’t pissed off, and stop trying to be vaguely threatening and then trying to bully people into being quiet about it.
-1/10 on the flounce. Either stick it or get banned.
” So keep acting like you know something when you don’t know how deep the rabbit hole goes.”
Actually, it’s called “acting like I don’t know things you haven’t told me.” You see, other people have minds that are actually different from yours and contain different information. I realize this is hard for some guys to understand, as they seem to be convinced that women are an omniscient, telepathic hivemind whose sole functioning is centered on screwing men over.
And didn’t you say you were leaving? What are you getting out of this that’s keeping you around?
Yes, David, please report John the Pissbucket. It probably won’t amount to much–his threat was vague and unlikely to provoke a response, on its own. However, if he does this routinely on other sites, then it might draw more attention to him.
@paradox:
Good comment as always. Hope things are going well, I’ve not been around much with work and all.
@Paradoxical Intent
wow…
“It sounds like women applaud that my mother beat me for no reason but im not surprised looking at the content of this site. Don’t worry I plan to pay all womkind back.”
Settle down, Valerie Solanas.
So…he came here to psych himself up to go on a mass-murdering spree, then?
Ah so the true colors come out. Nevermind the fact that several commentator actually showed sympathy for your abusive mother. Now you use non-existant comments as an excuse for threats. And you wonder why women don’t like you?
*Showed sympathy for you having an abusive mother. <— Is what I mean.
Wow, I need to spend more time thinking out my posts.
Holy crap. Troll went from whiny to Eliot Rodger while I was working.
John,
1. Who applauded child abuse here? Provide quotations.
2. There are many abuse survivors here, so stop pretending that we’re all just being mean to you because we don’t understand or care about child abuse.
3. By threatening violence, you are just perpetuating the cycle of violence. Be better than your mother. Don’t become an abuser yourself. Don’t take out your anger on the innocent.
4. Fuck off forever.
Christ, what an asshole.
Yikes. John is banned. I’ll report him, though the threats were vague enough I doubt it will make a difference,
But donkeys are hella sweet!
You know John, you Magtows really should be more careful about tossing out death threats. Someone might decide you were serious, and it would be just terrible if that happened.
(Note to everyone else: this is a satire that I am doing. I’m mocking the veiled threats disguised as handwringing that mras love so much by imitating it. Are we all caught up now?)