Never let it be said that the Men’s Rights movement does nothing to help men. Earlier this week, A Voice for Men’s CEO Paul Elam announced the launch of a new service for men. That service is that Elam, a noted former psychology major in college, will listen to you talk shit about women for an hour over Skype for $90.
Elam’s fans are excited to have a new talking point.
So what exactly does Elam’s new service, dubbed “An Ear for Men,” offer the discerning man who wants to pay someone who is not a licenced mental health professional $90 to listen to them for an hour on Skype? In his post announcing the service on AVFM, Elam explains that
Ostensibly the services provided will focus on life issues faced by men.
Ostensibly? “Ostensibly” is an adverb meaning “apparently or purportedly, but perhaps not actually.” Is this actually a phone sex service pretending to be a “consulting” business?
Services to be provided range from high-conflict relationships and divorce to substance abuse and other issues that disproportionately affect men.
Wait, Elam is saying that he will provide “high-conflict relationships and divorce to substance abuse?”
In the past, as that infamous Buzzfeed profile made clear, the often-divorced Elam has provided “high-conflict relationships and divorce” to women for free. Now men can get some of that Elam magic for themselves.
On the Ear for Men website, Elam spells out in a little more detail what his “services” will consist of. Of “Anxiety” he writes
Anxiety is one of the most common “mental health” problems worldwide. …
There are medications that can help reduce the symptoms of anxiety, some of which are either ineffective or addictive or both. …
The causes of anxiety disorders are not known. There are, however, many good reasons to believe that it is a problem rooted in brain chemistry, which is why I put “mental health” in scare quotes. …
As medical science develops a better understanding of anxiety we may see the day when it is treated much more effectively or even cured in most people. In the meantime there is no cure. There are, however, ways to cope with anxiety which help most people overcome the worst of its effects.
For more on that, you can read through the articles and links on this site dealing with anxiety.
There aren’t any articles or links provided.
If direct personal service to address this problem is what you desire, feel free to schedule an appointment with Paul.
“Direct personal service?” Now it sounds like he’s running an escort service.
On the pages devoted to most of Elam’s other “services,” from Anger Management to High Conflict Relationships, he offers … nothing. The pages are blank.
In a preface of sorts to his page on Self Respect, which he posted on May 28th, Elam explains that
This site is under construction. We are still populating it with content and working on the scheduling system. Thank you for bearing with us until the site is complete and services are available. We are hoping for official launch within three weeks of today’s date.
Wait, what? I guess you’ll have to cough up $90 to ask Elam how it is he has managed to launch this new site without actually launching it yet.
He starts off his discussion of “self respect” by writing:
Notice I did not title this with the tried and true psychobabble of “self-esteem.”
The URL for the page is anearformen.com/services/self-esteem, which suggests that he did in fact title his post “self-esteem” before thinking better of it. (WordPress — the blogging software that Elam uses for the site — gives blog posts URLs based on the title you give them; if you change the title later, the original URL remains unless you take steps to change it.)
It should be easy enough to schedule an hour with Elam in which to discuss these matters or any other questions you might have; as far as I can tell from looking through his appointments calendar, he doesn’t seem to have booked any appointments yet. Unless some poor soul has been scheduling appointments every day at 8:30 PM.
Inspired by Elam’s example here, I have decided to open my own “consulting” business, Three Ears for Men and Women and Maybe Cats.
Elam provides only a single ear for men, at the exorbitant price of $90 per ear, per hour. I provide THREE ears, at the low, low price of only $50 per ear-hour.
Here are the three ears.
And here’s how it works: Whenever you feel you have something to get off your chest, come to this web page, scroll down to the ears here, and talk to them for an hour. Then send me $150 on Paypal.
Never let it be said that I do nothing to help men. I mean, I’m a men, or at least a man, and I could use $150.
H/T: Margaret Pless, aka @idlediletante
At some point, advertising “Pay me money to talk about your problems” runs afoul of laws regarding professional therapists and mental health provider licensing requirements, no?
Asking Paul Elam for advice on anger management. That’s…
There’s not even a word for what that is.
$90/hr for fake counselling from someone who thinks psychiatric medicine doesn’t work? How long until Elam starts writing scifi novels and AVFM starts requiring their readers to get checked for feminist body-thetans?
Not that I have a spare $90 to find out, but I wonder what would happen if someone were to make an appointment and spend that hour talking about how awful MRAs are?
My guess is that he’d do a lot more than just “listen”. 🙂
Me first please me first…. I can talk to him about stuff
Wait, wait. I thought men didn’t “need or want to talk about our feelings.” I thought they wanted to stop being treated “like cash machines.”
I bet he’s calling it “consulting” so he doesn’t get in trouble for impersonating a licensed psychiatrist.
I really hope he doesn’t get a lot of business because, you know, these guys may need actual help and guidance and this guy…he’s not gonna make anything better. He’ll probably just fuck with them and make them dependent on his services.
Please tell me there’s someplace we can report him before he really fucks up some guys’ life? Please?
Sorry I forgot to put the sarcasm/irony tag
Ha! Glad to see the ‘ostensibly’ jumped out at you to. I saw that and immediately though “Ummm, I don’t think that word means what he thinks it means. You don’t usually apply it to your OWN stuff.”
That picture is so adorable! Speaking of anxiety, I carry a toy with me wherever I go recently and it helped me quite a bit. I used to take medicine but it didn’t do anything so I quit I got weak and dizzy but I’m fine now. I’ll just keep trying to be around people one step at a time and I’m sure I’ll get over it.
Ummm. $90/hr. To talk to someone who has scant training. Who is probably not specialized to treat a lot of the problems men would be calling about. (I forget; did Elam work as an addictions counselor or a relationship counselor? I seem to remember him working as some kind of counselor). That’s not helping men. That’s scamming them. Helping men would be connecting them with listened professionals in their area and helping them figure out how to fund treatment if they need help. Maybe even setting up some kind of fund to help poor men pay for mental health services.
Not charging $90/hr to talk to a non-professional.
Heehee… Part of me wishes I had enough cash to waste on this, just so that I could record the glorious results. It could be highly entertaining and potentially illuminating (not about any personal issues of mine, but about Elam).
I’m still squee’ing over the fact that Pauly thinks that divorce disproportionately affects men. Why u no logic, AVFM?
He would cut you off and still take your money, I bet.
As much as I roll my eyes at him “An Ear for Men” is pretty cute branding to build on “A Voice for Men” – He could do a lot with that, I mean if he ever did go into creating an active assistance non profit which perhaps provided resources for men to get out of abusive relationships or off the streets if they’re homeless he could call it “A Hand for Men”. If he started a non-profit fund raising jogging event he could call it “A Foot for Men”… I mean the opportunities are almost endless.
Till you run out of body parts at least.
@greyskye
You’re right. :O That would be really awesome.
NothingClever
Wait, wait. I thought men didn’t “need or want to talk about our feelings.” I thought they wanted to stop being treated “like cash machines.”
Anger and envy are not feelings apparently. Ironically wanting to stop being treated like cash machines is talking about your feelings. But I guess they just don’t want to listen to women when they say “talk about your feelings.”
I don’t know my lady brain can’t take all this complicated “Man Logic”
Did he seriously use air quotes for mental health? Wow, way to make it sound like you give a damn Elam.
That’s why Paul Elam, who can neither prescribe nor provide you with any medication legally, is your go-to for help with this medical condition.
That’s only when the person on the other side of the table doesn’t have a penis. Peens make everything okay.
@greyskye
An Eye for Men – A charity that helps disadvantaged youths get eyeglasses and eye surgery so they can properly learn and read.
A Heart for Men – A charity that helps men with heart diseases and helps with diet and exercise tips, since heart diseases affect 1 in 4 men.
A Thought for Men – A charity that encourages men to go to therapy and aims to destigmatize men needing mental help.
A Mouth for Men – A homeless shelter/soup kitchen organization.
A Breath for Men – A charity to help young boys with respiratory diseases get the medicine they need to play sports.
A Nose for Men – An ad campaign that will help boys and young men realize that spraying half a can of Axe all over their body does not attract the ladies and in facts kills off everyone’s smell.
Without insurance it costs me $75 an hour to talk to a mental health professional once a week about my problems. With insurance (Thanks Obama!) it costs me $15 an hour. So when I say I’d rather set $90 dollars on fire and snort the ashes than talk to Paul Elam about my problems, trust me when I say I’ve weighed the options carefully and shopped around for the best one.
IKR? Apparently the “high-conflict relationships and divorces” these men are seeking advice about don’t involve any women at all. Nope. Women almost never experience high-conflict relationships and divorce. Not as often as men do, anyway.
Duh.
I’m not a lawyer, as they say, but I think as long as he calls it “consulting” or “coaching” he’s legally allowed to do this. “Psychic” hotlines are also legal, though they’re usually called “entertainment” in the fine print.
What ARE his credentials? Does he have a BA? In something? Is he licensed to practice counselling? He sure isn’t a doctor.
Yep, same reason completely unlicensed, uneducated, unqualified people can practice midwifery. As long as the granolas are willing to hire them and they use an ambiguous title like “birth partner” or “friend” there’s nothing illegal about it, even if their lack of qualifications result in death. The same will be true of Paulie – don’t call yourself a licensed professional counselor or therapist and don’t call the service you’re providing therapy or counseling and you’re golden.
I’m just curious what his qualifications ARE/WERE when he did practice.