MGTOWs are planning to take over Puerto Rico and start their own lady-hating country there. No, really.

Over on A Voice for Men, a Man Going His Own Way named Frank Worley has unveiled a most immodest proposal: turning Puerto Rico, or at least a giant chunk of it, into a MGTOW nation. Yes, he’s serious. Also, an idiot.

As Worley sees it,

Women have used democracy to pressure our gutless politicians into surrendering our constitution, personal liberty and any semblance of due process. … Nothing male is sacred or protected. 

Instead of trying to organize politically to fight the evil dispossession of men — who control only 80% of congressional seats in the United States — Worley wants to rip it up and start again. 

The entrenched forces of Marxist Feminism and the cowardly politicians who cater to them, have taken all that is worthwhile from these once great and free nations.  So what is left for those of us who seek only to be treated as equals under the law?  …

The only immediate and complete solution to this problem is to concentrate our forces to create a majority in a single location so that WE become the state.   

The “it” that will be ripped up? Puerto Rico, or at least its eastern third. Worley hopes to turn at least this portion of Puerto Rico into some sort of alimony-free libertarian island paradise for the MGTOWs of the world. Well, the MGTOWs of America. They have to have American citizenship for Worley’s, er, ingenious plan to work.

One of my early proposals was the establishment of a micro-independent state on the eastern third of Puerto Rico.  The idea was to ask people who supported independence to move to one of several municipalities … and then vote for Mayors and council members who supported our program and then call a referendum.  If the petition for independence was denied by Congress then simply declare independence recognizing what that might imply.

Never mind that most of the supporters of Puerto Rican independence today are lefty types who aren’t likely to be big fans of either the MGTOW or the “libertarian paradise” aspects of Worley’s proposal. All he needs is to get a few American MGTOWs to move to the eastern third of Puerto Rico. Like, say 25,000 of them.

To accomplish this micro independence I would need upwards of 25 thousand MGTOW’s to relocated to the specific areas and register to vote.  … Any American citizen can move to Puerto Rico and vote and run for office and vote for independence.

Then, hey presto, a MGTOW nation in which “we write and enforce the laws without having to cow tow to the feminists.”

I’m sure the current residents of Puerto Rico will be thrilled to have tens of thousands of lady-hating white dudes show up overnight in an attempt to take over the government and declare themselves a MGTOW nation.

Also, the word is “kowtow.” “Cow towing” looks like this:

Worley, evidently taking inspiration from Starship Troopers, also declares that in this new nation, SERVICE GUARANTEES CITIZENSHIP.

The definition of being equal under the law in this proposal is service.  Military or civilian part time service is required for all citizens and immigrants both to deny entry to those who would seek only benefits of the new country and also to eliminate all other constantly changing definitions of who is a ‘protected class.’  Complete your service and you are equal under the law; fail to complete and you are not.

Yes, I’m sure libertarians will flock to a country where they will be forced into government service if they want full citizenship.

Oh, and did I mention that Worley, by his own admission, doesn’t even speak Spanish very well?

On A Voice for Men, Worley’s proposal met with, well, let’s charitably call it a mixed reaction. While many were sympathetic, they weren’t exactly sure this was a very practical plan. Dean Esmay even felt the need to stick up a little note at the start of the post declaring that “AVfM neither endorses nor rejects this proposal.” 

Hey, I can’t blame them. Given that AVFM is the most “activist” of all Men’s Rights organizations, and it just cancelled its much ballyhooed conference this year because organizing is just too darn hard, it is a little difficult to imagine MRAs or MGTOWs becoming organized enough to plan a picnic in the park much less take over a third of Puerto Rico, a US territory with 3.5 million inhabitants, a great number of whom live on the island’s eastern third.

And that’s not even taking into account the sabotage a would-be MGTOW nation would face from evil feminists.

Wow. The imaginary planet on which these guys live is a lot more entertaining than the planet Earth I live on.

I can’t help but think of the episode of The Simpsons in which Bart and his friends are stranded on a desert island, and Bart spells out his absurd vision of the paradise their island can become if they all work together:

Bart Simpson: And every night the monkey butlers will regale us with jungle stories.

Nelson: How many monkey butlers will there be?

Bart Simpson: One at first, but he’ll train others.

Good luck, fellas! Send a monkey butler over to let us know how this turns out.

EDIT: Also, if Puerto Rico doesn’t work out for you, why not try one of these lovely islands?