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Red Pill dudes agree: Volunteering can totally be alpha, just as long as you don’t help poor people. Or kittens.

Hold frame and do not give in to this kitten's devious "I want food" shit test.
Kitten shit-testing a human. Hold frame and do not give in! 

So one public-spirited gentleman who calls himself retturd has a question for the alpha dudes of the Ask The Red Pill subreddit: Is volunteering seen as blue pill? Retturd assures the assembled color-of-pill experts that “I love volunteering and helping people in general.” He just worries that being so helpful might be seen as terribly beta.

The regulars assure him that volunteering is perfectly fine for alphas. As long as they’re careful about just who they are helping. Helping old dudes and learning from their old-school alpha ways? Perfect. Helping poor people? Not so much:

abdada 11 points 6 hours ago  All men should have a cause that they actively do but don't talk about.  I volunteer at an old folk's home 2-3 weeks every year. It isn't charity; I learn freely from hanging out with old dudes.  But having a cause that is your own isn't beta. Helping others can be construed as white knighting, so you have to define what your limits in charity are.  I won't help poor people most of the time because I don't see many of them changing. I define my limits on my charity because it is my time and it is my money (sometimes) I am investing in others, not just throwing around freely.

Also, helping kittens is right out, unless you’re Elon Musk. Or at the very least a sharp-dressed swole dude.

ghrelly 2 points 4 hours ago  No single action is either blue pill or red pill.  Red pill is all about people's perception of you.  If Elon Musk started volunteering at an animal shelter with kittens, people would not think any less of him cause his SMV is so high that they perceive his action in a positive light.  On the other hand, if you have a mediocre job, not social, dressed shittly, didn't work out, and volunteer to raise kittens, people will probably see you as a beta.

DO YOU EVEN LIFT KITTENS, BRO?

 

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Yes Artistically
Yes Artistically
9 years ago

I read a few comments on Paulie’s “article” and one commenter, Seax, says:

“I think this will help to end ‘..but what are you doing for men’? complaints.”

Made me laugh a little..so many of those commenters just can’t stop talking about feminism and feminists.

yutolia
yutolia
9 years ago

I’m not sure I’ve ever seen a population so concerned with what everyone else thinks about them (and yes, that does include the stereotypical/movie version of extremely insecure white teenage girls).

ktward
9 years ago

The user’s handle is retturd. On reddit. And he’s* asking Red Pill-ers (!) what they think about an activity that is generally considered a self-less act.

Anyone else but me suspect retturd is simply fucking with them?

*for all I know, retturd is a she.

weirwoodtreehugger
9 years ago

recommending divorce, complete with male scapegoat, as a cure all for women for whatever petty dissatisfactions they feel about their mates.

In other words, Paulie is really pissed off that women can leave their abusive marriages.

We need Dads to teach their sons, not “how to treat a woman,” but how to hold their own with them. We don’t need to teach them to “take care of their woman,” but to only accept one who demonstrates the character and integrity to be trusted, from the start.

MRA to English translation: fathers need to teach their sons how to abuse women and how to find a woman who is vulnerable to abuse.

Mizuki
Mizuki
9 years ago

I’m far too happily surprised that I knew the picture was of Winston Churchill. Like limesweet, I don’t know how I know that. Also who is Elon Musk? I’ve been reading this blog for a while and I don’t recall coming across him before.

wordsp1nner
wordsp1nner
9 years ago

Elam is also selling an ebook he cowrote that claims to tell women how to get rid of their boyfriend’s “crazy”* ex. Because MRAs think that even dealing with other people’s messy breakups is women’s work.

*I know women can be abusive and toxic, but the “crazy ex” is a misogynistic trope. Knowing Elam, he probably means a woman who wants child support.

weirwoodtreehugger
9 years ago

Usually when men go on and on about how crazy their ex is, it means he was acting like an asshole and she decided not to take it. Most of the men I’ve met who genuinely had an ex who treated him poorly are hurt and then move on. When men are discussing women, crazy is usually code for a woman who has her own opinions and doesn’t take to being pushed around. It usually has nothing to do with the actual state of her mental health.

EJ (The Other One)
9 years ago

Re “crazy exes”: I think it’s probably more likely a consequence of what sort of women Red Pillers choose to date and how they choose to treat them. If one gets involved with a vulnerable younger woman, terrorises her into codependence and then abandons her when she starts to assert herself / gets too old / breaks down entirely, then for her to act unreasonably is what you’d expect.

Fuck the Red Pill.

Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
9 years ago

Add to that the fact that larger mental health community has consciously divorced itself from any concern about how men are affected by things like divorce, parental alienation, abusive partners, false accusations and the like.

Yet all this has been rewritten with misandric ink. It has been revised by scholars who tell us men are bad, by psychologists whose main field of work seems to be recommending divorce, complete with male scapegoat, as a cure all for women for whatever petty dissatisfactions they feel about their mates.

*ticks off “Believes that psychiatrists and psychologists are evil” checkbox on the “Is this group a full-fledged cult?” list*

Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
9 years ago

“Crazy ex” also commonly refers to women who’ve been raped or abused in the past. Regardless of how she’s handled it or if she’s even mentioned it more than once.

Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
9 years ago

… Y’know what, “Misandric Ink” is the perfect nickname for my Inkling Girl Amiibo. Thanks, Elam, now I can play the DLC challenges!

Moocow
Moocow
9 years ago

Add to that the fact that larger mental health community has consciously divorced itself from any concern about how men are affected by things like divorce, parental alienation, abusive partners, false accusations and the like.

Unbelievable bullshit. I was abused by a woman who cheated on her boyfriend with me, went so far as to tell me she loved me and fantasized about living with me all while gaslighting me for being upset by the whole situation. If it weren’t for my psychiatrist, I’m not sure where I’d be today considering my group of (now ex-) friends all abandoned me and took her side.

@wordsp1nner

*I know women can be abusive and toxic, but the “crazy ex” is a misogynistic trope. Knowing Elam, he probably means a woman who wants child support.

Yup! My ex is not crazy, she is simply a morally- and ethically-challenged asshole who likes to rationalize away her problems (and has been on the receiving end of abuse herself). I despise it when assholes try to justify their misogynistic behavior as the result of ‘some crazy ex’.

zennurse
9 years ago

Sorry, this is OT but hadn’t seen it here.

Nobel prize winner and his problem with “girls” in the lab. Apparently they fall in love with you and then they cry. Condescending dinosaur.

http://freethoughtblogs.com/pharyngula/2015/06/09/being-a-good-scientist-doesnt-make-one-a-good-person/

Orion
Orion
9 years ago

I had to double-take to spot it, but Elam isn’t actually offering “counseling.” He’s offering “consulting.” Because alpha.

I can see it now. “See a therapist? No way man, therapy is for chicks. I’ll just check in with my mental health consultant.”

Binjabreel
9 years ago

And, holy crap, there’s already a “no emotions” and “provides practical solution-based advice” type of therapy- it’s fuckin behavioral-cognitive therapy.

He’s not even offering anything new.

sunnysombrera
sunnysombrera
9 years ago

MRA inconsistency number 3057:

“Men TRY to talk about their feelings, but women don’t let them!”

“I’ve got a consultancy service going but you can’t talk about your feelings because Real Men don’t do girly stuff like that!”

Granted Elam himself stayed consistent. The other AVFMers though, probably agree with his “No Emotions” policy, right after complaining that feeemales are the meeeean ones that pick on men for expressing themselves.

bekabot
bekabot
9 years ago

Here’s a flashy 18th century guy, lowering his SMV by sitting like a beta

He is not either sitting like a beta, he’s showing off his SMV by flaunting his thoroughbred flanks. That was an alpha move when George IV was King.

Game is not constant, any more than anything else. Today we play poker and not piquet and while the basic objective is unchanged (“let’s win”) the specific rules aren’t what they were in 1800. Ends versus means, after all. Even if this is a concept beyond the grasp and ken of most Redpillians, persons who are provided with an awareness that time passes may admit it into their consciousness without harm. Or so one would expect.

EJ (The Other One)
9 years ago

And, holy crap, there’s already a “no emotions” and “provides practical solution-based advice” type of therapy- it’s fuckin behavioral-cognitive therapy.

He’s not even offering anything new.

That makes me feel better than the alternative: that Paul Elam has invented, using his manbrain, a new and hitherto-undiscovered form of therapy that will totally work because of logics and evopsych.

Misha
Misha
9 years ago

Colour me unsurprised that Paulie’s offering his own ‘consultancy’ service. He even refers to it as ‘My practice’, and says it is ‘open to all men from all walks of life, including all members of the gay, bisexual and transgender communities’. Because AVFMers have such a fantastic track record of dealing thoughtfully and sensitively with the issues faced by these groups*

I think Elam used to be an alcohol and substance misuse counsellor, and came across domestic violence issues fairly frequently (on the part of the men he was counselling, from what I remember). Somehow his experience of working with abusers caused him to conclude that it was all women’s fault.

*Yes Janet Bloomfield, I’m looking at you: http://www.donotlink.com/framed?693786

sunnysombrera
sunnysombrera
9 years ago

Somehow his experience of working with abusers caused him to conclude that it was all women’s fault.

…he actually began to believe what his abuser clients were telling him? Fuck a duck, Paul was one shitty-ass counsellor.

Misha
Misha
9 years ago

Also, on the ‘Ear for Men’ page (holy crap, that name makes my day), there’s a screed on why it’s so important that AEFM remains a male only space, no women allowed, absolutely not, we need services designed specifically and only for men, this is a safe space for men, MEN ONLY. Then in the comment’s section someone gives a women’s name and asks if the policy applies to her. And Paul’s like, “Nope, she’s good. I like her” .

I find this unintentionally hilarious.

katz
katz
9 years ago

Ear for Men?

theluckyfrog
9 years ago

If you’re having alpha problems, I feel sorry for you son, I’ve got 99 problems and trying to determine what is “alpha” so I don’t look uncool to other losers on the internet who are the only ones who conform to this bizarrely limited and destructive worldview I’ve decided to adhere to instead of doing things that improve my life or make me happy ain’t one.

Jimmy
Jimmy
9 years ago

I can’t stand the “crazy ex” thing. How many times have I had to listen to some completely unaware monster complain on and on about their “crazy ex” only to hear this exact phrase while I sat there feigning sympathy at what they had to “endure.”
“Well, I only cheated on her ONCE!”
No kidding. That bomb ALWAYS dropped.

sunnysombrera
sunnysombrera
9 years ago

There’s always an underlying story when it comes to the tales of “My Crazy Ex”.

“My crazy ex used to start fights over every little thing!”

Translation: “I tried to control everything my ex did, from where she went to what she ate, and she would object and insist that she do what she wanted to do, then we’d argue. Bitch!”