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Pickup artist “Heartiste” seems to think the notion of “playing hard to get” was his idea in the first place

The combination of
The combination of “playing hard to get” and Dacron slacks once again proves irresistible to women.

Heartiste — the pompous racist shitbag and alleged pickup artist of great renown —  is feeling a bit boastful again.

In a post yesterday, he links to a two-year-old Business Insider post with the clickbaity title 12 Scientifically Proven Ways To Make Yourself More Attractive To The Opposite Sex. He’s interested in Scientifically Proven Way #8: “Men should play hard to get.”

The sciencey “proof” of this old saw comes from a 2010 study of, you guessed it, college undergraduates. As Business Insider’s Megan Willet summarized it, “the study suggested that if men hold back some of their feelings at the very beginning, and create some mystery, he’ll be more likely to hook a member of the opposite sex.”

The Business Insider piece also suggests eating fruits and vegetables, keeping your teeth white, and, if you’re a woman, wearing red lipstick.

Somewhat odder suggestions: women should talk in a higher voice and men should wear a T-shirt. That is, a shirt with a giant letter T on it. Apparently, according to some study from researchers at Nottingham Trent University that I’m not going to bother to read, women find men with giant T’s on their shirts “12% more attractive,” because the T creates the illusion of broader shoulders and a thinner waist.

In other words, as is often the case in such articles, the “scientific” advice is either trite, blindingly obvious or kind of silly.

But Heartiste thinks that this whole “playing hard to get” thing is quite the revelation.

He also seems to think it was … his idea in the first place.

The mainstream media have been reading CH. “Men should play hard to get.” Glad to see the Rude Word of Game is finally penetrating block-like skulls.

Yes, dude, I’m sure this two-year old article referencing a five-year-old study that seems to reaffirm a “Game” principle that probably dates back to prehistoric days is the result of people reading your idiot blog.

I mean, my fucking cats understand “playing hard to get.”

This isn’t the first time Heartiste has tried to claim some bit of conventional wisdom as a Heartiste Original.  I called him out a couple of years back for claiming he had “introduced”‘ the idea of sexual market value, which led to this highly edifying Twitter “debate.” (Sorry about the duplicate tweets; that’s just how Twitter handles embedding.)

I noted that the term “meat market” was a common way to describe singles bars, and pointed out that really, the whole “dating world = marketplace” equation was “a commonplace notion that no sensible person would claim they’d thought up or popularized recently.”

Ah, well, I amuse myself at least.

And speaking of amusing: I also just discovered this definition of Sexual Market Value on Urban Dictionary; not only is it much more entertaining than Heartiste’s version, but it was also posted a year before Mr. H claims he “introduced” the idea.

TOP DEFINITION     Sexual Market Value Ones Sexual Market Value can only be found by using this simple easy to use equation.   ((Attractiveness) + ((4x)Socal status) + (Style)) - ((Nose Length) + (Weight) + (C) + (-Height))= Sexual Market Value   When (C) equals car type  Truck = 30  Car = 20  Suv = 10  Hybrid = 300  Motorcycle = 0  Vespa = 600  Van = 25  Classic Car = 5  Dune Buggy = -42

After doing the calculations, I find that my SMV is 7.37482 pounds per square inch (of nose).

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Alan Robertshaw
9 years ago

David, just to let you know, in certain parts of the UK “ponce” is less than flattering slang for a gay man or a straight man that acts in what is perceived to be a stereotypically gay fashion.

AnAndrejaPejicBlog (@Lindsay_Irene)

One of Heartiste’s minions is “bjworthy69”? Yeah, you just keep trying to convince everyone that you’re getting all kinds of oral sex there, buddy. We totally believe you. *smirk* You’re not overcompensating or anything!!

So the BI article says that women should wear red lipstick to be attractive, but every goddamn “Don’t wear this ladies, men hate it!” article that shows up on the internet claims that men hate it. How am I supposed to know which clickbait to believe?

Jeff K
Jeff K
9 years ago

Thank goodness for SMV, I might have thought, foolishly, that self-acceptance and treating others with respect might make me attractive to others.

And there has to be a factor to add or subtract depending in the type of person you want to meet. You can’t tell me the average gay male won’t be happy to date a guy with a dune buggy. A submarine would likely break the grading curve.

freemage
9 years ago

I love that formula, particularly its lack of units, or measurement guide for any of the abstract values other than… your car. And of course, there’s no hint as to what a good or bad final SMV would be. If your SMV is 17, does this mean that you’re forever alone, or that you have men and women begging to buy you drinks?

Also, the fact that, if I read the formula right, the sexiest thing you can own is a dune buggy makes me giggle.

Diane F. Martin
9 years ago

I like when men play hard-to-get because it means they aren’t harassing me or trying to get in my business.

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
9 years ago

@freemage:

Actually, there’s a hidden minus sign, so the sexiest vehicle is actually a Vespa. A prius is a distant second, apparently.

Since there are no units specified anywhere, the only thing I can conclude is that the creator thinks the most important factor is social status. Well, imagine that; if people think you’re awesome, they’ll want to sleep with you.

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
9 years ago

@freemage:

Wait, crap, you’re right. Dune buggy it is.

Adam Pack
9 years ago

Due to my cherished ignorance of the PUA world, and the way we grade drawing implements here in England, I thought when you said ‘HB10s’ you were talking about unusually large pencils. Sadly Google has now disillusioned me.

Spindrift
Spindrift
9 years ago

B-bu-bu-but how can you calculate SMV without your wrist circumference?!

reymohammed
reymohammed
9 years ago

That article purporting to show “12 Scientifically Proven Ways ” to attract the opposite sex is right in only one point: clean, sound teeth are a sign of good health. Lipstick depends on both the face and the fashion. For my part, I have always found a spontaneously joyous, smiling man attractive. What is repellent is phony cheerfulness.

I have noticed it is the habit of North American women to pitch their voices about half an octave lower than a Brit’s. I put it down to our earlier exposure to dictaphones and answering machines, and our disgust at hearing the playback sound like Minnie Mouse.

sunnysombrera
9 years ago

Considering the size of the average woman’s head and the size of the average man’s belly, Heartiste is either a) very, very obese or b) lying. Or c) those HB10s are actually Barbie dolls.

AAAtheist
9 years ago

Somewhat odder suggestions: women should talk in a higher voice and men should wear a T-shirt.  That is, a shirt with a giant letter T on it.  Apparently, according to some study from researchers at Nottingham Trent University that I’m not going to bother to read, women find men with giant T’s on their shirts “12% more attractive,” because the T creates the illusion of broader shoulders and a thinner waist.

I sooooooooooo hope PUAs adopt this tactic so we can point at and laugh at them even more easily than we do now!

Maybe the giant “T” stands for tacky?  Who else wants to play?  XD

davidknewton
davidknewton
9 years ago

“I actually have three HB10s napping in the folds of my belly fat right this moment.” 😀 I admire your ability to shrug this stuff off – it’s amazing that this whole group never advanced beyond the debate tactic of calling people fat.

In keeping with British slang, “T” = “Tosspot”.

Falconer
Falconer
9 years ago

Psst … sunnysombrera … that’s David’s tweet, and I think he means his cats.

Falconer
Falconer
9 years ago

I’m in Tennessee, so I frequently see people walking around with giant Ts on their shirts. Unfortunately, it’s in a serif typeface, so it isn’t all that slimming.

proxieme
proxieme
9 years ago

This reminds me of when my kid declared that she had invented the games “spin around on your swing until you’re about to barf” and “don’t touch the floor – it’s lava!”.

She was 6.

It’s good to know that she’s since passed by the average PUA in her level of maturity and self-reflection.

fromafar2013
fromafar2013
9 years ago

Woo, I have a hybrid, so by SMV is somewhere around -300 regardless of the other values.

I’m guessing the hybrids are less ‘sexy’ than just regular cars because they’re part electric?

Okay, but what if someone has a Tesla Roadster? It’s fully electric, so it’s less ‘sexy’ than the partially electric hybrid cars, right? But it’s a roadster, and some newer Tesla models come with a mode that lets you go from 0 to 60 in a hair over 3 seconds, and that’s sexy, right? Plus all electric and most hybrid models have all of their (often impressive amounts of) torque available at all times at any speed (no need to ‘rev up’) so acceleration is super quick and very smooth, even from a stop, giving you a performance edge over similarly speced ICE vehicles. Soooo… what’s my SMV now!? I’m so confused.

Alan Robertshaw
9 years ago

@ David

It may well have that meaning elsewhere over your side of the pond. Over here it originally meant ‘pimp’ or any man who essentially mooched off of women. It’s still sometimes used with that connotation e.g if a bloke won’t get a job “You still poncing off your girlfriend?” etc.

dhag85
9 years ago

I actually love how obvious it is that you’re seriously bothering these people. The slightest criticism and their auto-response is “UR FAT!!!” Like babies.

Buttercup Q. Skullpants

It’s interesting to see how quickly Heartiste’s amused mastery disappears when he’s directly challenged. That wasn’t very alpha of him, regressing to the third grade.

Yeah, he didn’t invent or even popularize SMV. All he did was redefine it to benefit men, and then present it as evo psych gospel. If you look at that ridiculous quiz on his site, the standards for women are virtually unattainable (and go rapidly downhill from there), while all men need to do is show up and have a pulse. Any economist would laugh themselves silly at that model.

Lisa C (@hppykittystudio)

Oh, Fart-tiste…..you should never be allowed near a computer or singles bar :

Spindrift
Spindrift
9 years ago

@fromafar2013 “I’m guessing the hybrids are less ‘sexy’ than just regular cars because they’re part electric?”

If things being electric makes them less sexy that’s bad news for those MGTOW/incels and their sexbot dreams.

Monzach
Monzach
9 years ago

@Alan Robertshaw: I shudder to think what the English opinion on the Conquistador Juan Ponce de Leon is, then. :O

@proxieme: I thought I’d invented the game “swing on a swing-y thing in your yard and then kick the ball that your buddy throws at you” when I was 6, too. I quickly realized that other kids has copied my great invention. 🙁

As for the OP, I love how secure in his manly manliness he is, relying on all sorts of personal insults the moment that his “originality” is questioned…

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