So Susan Morris, the Conference Manager for A Voice for Men’s allegedly upcoming “Men’s Issues” conference this year. has posted a rather puzzling statement attempting to answer questions she’s been getting from AVFM readers “concerning there being fewer speakers on the programme this year and the ticket price being higher.”
Morris — described on the site as “a British woman, an experienced general and event manager in public service” — assures potential conference goers that, “contrary to the headline which I saw somewhere, the ticket price has not been set at $649!”
And that’s true. If you go to the conference’s website, you can see that, in fact, full price tickets to the event are only $645.
That is FOUR WHOLE DOLLARS LESS than the amount reported by the scurrilous press. And … by Morris herself, later in her post.
But hey, she suggests, only suckers will be paying the full $649.
The Early Bird Discount ensures that if you purchase your ticket by the 30th of April, you will only pay $399. Buy it between 1 May and 30 June and you’ll still get it at a good discount, at the price of $449. The price will increase in $50 steps until it gets to the buy-at-the-door price of $649 and we expect very few, if any, to do so. In fact, that price has been set to deter people from doing so, so that they don’t hold up those people who have been entered into the pre-registration system and only need to book in.
Morris also insists that
Contrary to the efforts made by our detractors to blacken our name, the ticket price is not aimed at making a profit but breaking even would be nice.
Yeah, it’s not like AVFM founder and chief donation-receiver Paul Elam ever said that he hoped to make some actual profit from the conference. You know, except for that time he said he “hope[d] to make some actual profit” from the conference.
So what’s to blame for the higher price? Apparently, it’s largely due to, er, time-traveling protesters from Detroit?
Last year, you may recall, a group of Detroit-area activists held a protest several weeks before AFVM’s conference was scheduled to happen in that city. There were no protesters at the event itself.
This year, the conference is being held in Elam’s hometown of Houston. But evidently — at least in the fevered imaginations of AVFM’s brain trust — that won’t stop last year’s protesters from driving 1300 miles from Detroit to Houston to protest this year’s event. At least that’s what Morris seems to be suggesting:
The protesters from last year have already vowed to shut us down this year and though we know they will not achieve their aim, they will still be protesting (as is their right, of course). Security and safety of our attendees, speakers and volunteer staff will always be of prime importance and so, to avoid a repeat of last year’s emergency appeal for funding, we have built into the costs additional but reasonable security cover.
Aside from “security cover” from time-travelling protesters, what will attendees get for their $649 — sorry, $645 — that no one is really expected to pay?
Fewer speakers!
“Last year,” Morris writes
in our naivety and enthusiasm, we overbooked the number of speakers for the two day event. During the conference it became clear that the programme was too full and did not allow sufficient time for decent length talks followed by full question and answer sessions. This year we have arranged ten speakers.
Greater punctuality!
And this year we will ensure that we start each session on time.
Longer lunch breaks! And afternoon breaks!
We have extended the afternoon break and the lunch time and we will be opening the doors each day at 8am. So, provided you arrive early, you will have over eight hours across the two days to mingle with other attendees and to network. And that’s not including the time spent at the evening events, socialising and networking with other like-minded people over dinner or pizza.
Dinner is an additional $20; Pizza is $15. But the time you spend eating is ABSOLUTELY FREE.
A larger number of unpaid staffers than you would think would be even remotely necessary for an event of its size!
Another factor which people tend to forget is the cost of flying in the speakers and volunteer staff and accommodating them all. Between speakers, panel discussion members and staff, we’ll have some forty five people there.
Free taxi service!
We’re arranging an optional taxi service to collect you from your hotel and take you to the venue and then to return you afterwards.
Wait, scratch that, the Taxi service will cost you an additional $15!
But talking to the cabbie is INCLUDED IN YOUR TICKET PRICE.
And finally, FREE ACCESS to an actual BRITISH WOMAN — namely conference manager Susan Morris herself.
I shall be flying in to Houston from the UK. It will be my first flight, a long one around ten hours and I can’t say I’m looking forward to it. But the end result will be worth it. I am looking forward to meeting as many of you as I can.
Because why not fly your conference manager all the way from the UK at the conference-goers’ expense? Sure, makes perfect sense!
I wonder if a single person has bought a ticket for the conference yet.
This really inspired me to finally commit to starting my own convention.
I hearby announce HarassCon 2016.
HarassCon will be the first convention to cater to the much maligned and neglected community of Internet Harassers. HarassCon will bring together internet harassers of all kinds in a friendly and supportive environment. Racist? Misogynist? Homophobe? Just a plain ole’ Hater? There is a spot for you at HarassCon.
Keynote Speaches:
“The Ethics of Death & Rape Threats”
“The future of harassment: Why our culture will not only survive but thrive”.
“More Effective Sockpuppeteting”
“Sending Better Threats : How to Up Your Harassment Game”
“The Real Harassment of the Anti-Harassers”
Note: HarassCon intends to be a Safe Space for Internet Harassers. We have a strict code-of-conduct policy that all attendees must abide by. Failure to do so will result in your ejection.
@rugbyyogi
Oh no. 🙁 Hugs if you want them.
I never know whether to think it’s depressing or funny that AVFM always has a bunch of women do all their work for them. Seriously, how am I expected to buy into the notion that men are superior civilization builders if none of them can get by without the (usually unpaid) labor of women to prop them up.
They completely prove feminist’s point. That women have always worked and contributed to society. We just got denied credit for it.
But we can’t forget that the only “real” work is the kind that involves a blue collar, work boots, using big, scary he-man muscles and sweating all day. Never mind that through history, a large portion, maybe even most, was not traditionally done by white men.
Darn….it’s that block quote monster. It was WWTH’s quote I used.
I highly doubt this. If there is one thing most people have realized since the last joke of a conference, is that MRAs are their worst enemy. Those people will crash and burn on their own. Which is better, IMO.
You are doing the right thing, rugbyyogi.
My mother has 5 divorces under her belt due to her insistence on marrying the same type of person. The general mindset of a MRA-type does not lend to rational and cooperative engaging. They think they’re rational, but they are not. Everything is about getting even, and they will use your good-faith bargaining against you. Every. Time.
Stay strong and trust your gut!
rugbyyogi: “I will one day leave him ‘without warning’. Soon, I hope. My life is a misery.”
Oh, no. I remember this all too well. I hope you are able to turn it around. When I got divorced I thought all this men and women are different stuff was hogwash. Now, I don’t.
Men don’t ‘hear’ the way women do. Words mean more to most women than most men, which is why if you just left he would be surprised. (I am convinced that men don’t even have the same vision that women do. They appear to have a much more holistic vision, whereas our vision is much more detail-oriented.)
If you want to gain a man’s attention, it must be done through action (or, in some cases, inaction) NOT words. When I was married as a young person, I made the mistake of trying to communicate with a man as if he was a woman. I tried very hard, but I was doing the wrong things. If you can shift your perspective, it doesn’t take as much effort. I didn’t have to do *more*; I had to do things *differently*. And so did he.
I really recommend all of Dr. John Gray’s books to get into all the details. Best of luck. Have courage and faith!
Uh…I’d take anything Mrs. Minter says with a grain of salt, rugbyyogi. She’s not exactly here in good faith.
Rubyyogi, I second Paradoxical’s comment. And best of luck to you. I was in a bad domestic situation before meeting my husband – fortunately, the man involved left on his own. His surprise came when he tried to come back.
@Kate Minter:
Uhhh… the hell? Men don’t “hear” or “see” the same way women do? Bullshit. You’ll find people across all genders who are more or less intuitive, or more or less observant, or more or less empathetic. There’s definitely a cultural influence that causes women to be required to care and listen to everyone around them, whereas men don’t get that same push, but it’s not some innate capacity. You do realize that Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus is basically just repeating modern stereotypes without any true validity, right?
…
Apparently not.
Good thing there’s a man like John Gray who can explain to other men how women think. 🙂
Kate, I’ve read some excerpts from his books, and I find him overwhelmingly reductionist and the way he describes the way women think/act is kind of…
… completely not me.
He only seems to describe a subset of men, but pretends he’s talking about a wide range. He’s not bad, but I wouldn’t hold him up as the epitome of “this is how all people need to communicate with their partners.”
Also, could you not pretend it’s only the wife’s job to adjust to the way her husband thinks? In a good relationship, I’d assume the guy would also do his best to try and understand the way his specific partner thinks and acts. You made a token acknowledgement of that with the “And so did he”, but you seem to imply that if rugbyyogi does as you did, their partner will also do the same.
There’s absolutely no guarantee that said partner will be anywhere near willing to try and do anything differently.
…or that he thinks like Dr. Gray thinks he does.
(Dr. Gray isn’t awful, just… doesn’t acknowledge that there’s more of a spectrum as much as I’d like. I mean, there’s not much of a spectrum even implied when your catchphrase for everything says men and women are from completely different planets in a time period where there aren’t little habitable colonies between the two where people can chill)
No wonder my husband is having so much trouble painting teeny-tiny skulls onto his chaos demons.
Ninja’d by everyone.
Katz, your husband sounds cool, for the record. Also, way more detail oriented than me.
Women are from Omicron Persei 7, men are from Omicron Persei 9.
I never really knew what Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus actually meant… Now I know. Gray argues that men are the actors, the doers, while women are the talkers, the passive receptacles. Apparently the vast percentage of the advice in the book is directed toward women, urging them to be compliant to their husbands.
Get it? Because Mars is the God of War, and Venus is the Goddess of Beauty?
(Source)
I figured it had to be something like that if Kate Minter was singing its praises.
There’s a shit ton of marriage advice books that are bad news. I’ve read more than a few. Men are from Mars..etc is definitely ranking up there. (Didn’t read it all) Yes, it gives men excuses and encourages the women to change, but it also infantilises men and gives women excuses to behave childishly, too – because they can’t help it, y’know. That’s stereotypes for you. Anyone who advises that book is gonna get the rest of their advice marked down accordingly.
But Kate Minter is right, he doesn’t hear me. Partly because he can’t see past reductionist, self-absolving shit like MRA or Men are From Mars. And he’s already knows bloody well that I don’t fit the stereotype of ‘typical woman’ (as if anyone does).
Like most of these MRA blokes he wants to have the upper hand, but can’t quite define what that means, and certainly won’t take the steps to actually be an equal partner, never mind a leader – like actually make a decision or do stuff. These guys are the ultimate ‘rights without responsibility’ whiners.
Anyway, Mars is too cold and Venus is too hot, but Earth, in places, can be just right.
@rugbyyogi sorry to hear that. Not a fun place to be. Hang in there. 🙂
@kate what @contrapangloss said. Nothing in there describes me, or my husband, very well at all. ie: the whole thing about ‘the cave’ is far more me than my husband (my sister is very much this way as well).
For anyone interested in Gray’s theorectum about ‘the cave’:
And don’t worry! Gray hasn’t forgotten about women with his cave metaphor! Men are intellectuals with caves to retreat to, women are cyclical waves with wells of emotion to drown in.
The “cave” thing is just saying “all women are extraverts, all men are introverts.” Which is not true at all.
Rubyogi,
Very sorry you are going through this and in misery. Sounds like you’re close. When u are ready, you’ll feel so proud and brave. I do know it’s the hardest thing to do. Sending strong thoughts.
Men are not some kind of alien species. They don’t have their own form of communication that women can learn to mime but never understand.
If a man is an asshole, the key word is asshole. Not man. Men are just as capable of “emotional intelligence” as women, and if a man chooses not to make an attempt at exercising his, that is a choice he is making.
We keep telling misogynist men that women are people and should be treated like people. The reverse goes as well: men are people, not aliens.
Tracy, I totally agree with you on the cave. I want the cave. The good doctor can take his wave and keep it where the sun shines bright, but I like my cave!
Also: Theorectum. I like this word very, very much. May I steal it?
rugbyyogi: Can you give an example of a small problem in your relationship and a big problem in your relationship?
Would you categorize the issue as “I can’t stand to be in the same room as this person/he drives me crazy/I don’t want him touching me” or is there adultery, abuse, or addiction that is going on?
What five things would you change about him if you could? Is there anything about yourself you’d like to change?