ATTENTION, MEN OF THE WORLD! More specifically, straight men. Even more specifically, straight men who are gigantic woman-hating douchebags.
Your boy Roosh Valizadeh, pickup guru and rape legalization advocate, would like to warn you about the impending end of the world, at least in terms of you being able to get into women’s pants.
Inspired by the DEFCON system used by the US Military to rate the level of military threat — DEFCON 5 means “chill out, we’ve got this” and DEFCON 1 means “holy crap we’re all gonna die” — Roosh has come up with what he calls the DEFCOCK system — get it? get it? — in order to give dudes “objective and standardized information” on how dude-friendly different countries are.
In countries currently at DEFCOCK 5 — that is, which have what he thinks as the healthiest environment for men — (straight, cis) men benefit from
Completely normal male-female relations in a patriarchal society that believes in a binary gender system of man and woman. Homosexuality is persecuted. Casual sex is difficult (if not impossible).
Countries at DEFCOCK 5 include Iran, Saudi Arabia and Pakistan. Strangely. Roosh has not himself decided to move to any of these countries.
He then works his way down the list. There’s DEFCOCK 4, which he claims characterizes countries like Russia, Turkey, and Colombia, and in which
Divorce rates may be high, but there is a low threat of divorce rape. A mixture of provider and clown game is needed.
There’s DEFCOCK 3 (Poland, Estonia, Brazil), in which
Women have gained masculine traits and delay monogamy to launch a meaningless office career while experimenting with over 25 local and foreign penises to understand how their vaginas respond to various bad boy stimuli. …
Huh. I didn’t look up numbers for Estonia and Brazil, but in Poland, according to one recent survey, the average number of lifetime sexual partners is 4.5. Not 45, not 25, 4.5.
And DEFCOCK 2 (England, Scandinavia, the good old US of A), in which
Non-heterosexual lifestyles are promoted as superior and major efforts are undertaken to destroy traditional marriage. Campaigns are launched to shame and criminalize consensual sex and masculine behavior such as flirting and bodybuilding. Divorce rape is common, with likelihood of imprisonment for missing alimony payments. Provider game is useless on beautiful women. Clown game is required for all men wanting to get laid.
Yeah, I’m pretty sure that roughly 0.00000% of that is actually true.
There’s only one level scarier than DEFCOCK 2 and that’s, you guessed it, DEFCOCK 1.
Severe threat of imprisonment for men displaying heterosexual or masculine behaviors. Roaming witch mobs actively surveil and monitor men who hint at having normal levels of testosterone.
ROAMING WITCH MOBS!
Women are elevated to goddess status while straight men appointed as their sexual servants through both legal action and media shaming.
GOVERNMENT MANDATED SEXUAL SERVITUDE!
Unsafe to live, fornicate, marry, or procreate; males must immediately vacate area for their own personal safety, both physical and mental
While Roosh notes that we haven’t yet reached DEFCOCK 1 anywhere on planet earth, he suspects that Toronto may be the first to go, and as soon as 2023.
Yep, that’s right: in less than a decade, Toronto males will literally be running from ROAMING WITCH MOBS intent on testing their T levels.
Bomb shelters can’t save you, fellas, so stay away from any place rated DEFCOCK 2, as it could easily slide into DEFCOCK 1 territory. Roosh’s advice:
find a city that is either in DEFCOCK 4 or just recently slipped to DEFCOCK 3, because once a decline accelerates, it may happen too quickly for you to leave before you wake up and see a nuclear cloud in the shape of a vagina right outside your window.
A NUCLEAR CLOUD IN THE SHAPE OF A VAGINA.
Now I am become Death, the destroyer of boners.
“You forgot “white” in there too David. Remember, to Roosh and the gang, “if it ain’t white, it ain’t right”.”
????????????????????
But Rooshie isn’t white ????????????????????????
Apparently, I need to move to Toronto… I feel “member of a ROAMING WITCH MOB” would make a nice addition to my bio
Is it just me, or does “Roaming Witch Mobs” sounds like a great black metal band name? And “Vagina Shaped Mushroom Clouds” sounds like a great Pornogrind band name, too. 😛
@Robert – I also immediately got that song in my head! I shall replace it with your version.
Please know that the citizens of Toronto are committed to being the first DEFCOCK 1 city in the world. As part of our Phase 1 implementation plan, we are in the process of assembling roving witch mobs to apprehend male bodybuilders, dress them as clowns, and force them to marry each other. We are also phasing out all straight male City Councillors, and replacing them with feral cats.
In Phase 2, we will replace Pride Week with Shame Week, in which straight, cis males will be paraded through the streets in cages and then pilloried and pelted with bon-bons.
Fear the Atomic Bombshell!
http://lucian.uchicago.edu/blogs/colloquium/files/2013/09/Miss-Atomic-1957.jpg
It’s telling that for Roosh, for all his obsession with getting laid, “completely normal male-female relations in a patriarchal society that believes in a binary gender system of man and woman” as a pro outweighs “casual sex is difficult” as a con. It really is proof that PUAs don’t just care about sex–what they really want is complete control over women.
Also “homosexuality is persecuted”. Yes, that is totally relevant to creating a safe environment for men. Besides upsetting the “completely normal” natural order, I imagine like lots of other straight male misogynists, Doosh is deeply afraid of being hit on by gay men, even though he encourages sexual harassment and even assault of women.
@Mitchel
The problem is – petition to who? Being a stupid asshole isn’t illegal, if his web host cared they’d have shut him down years ago and he’s not going to close his own site.
Bina,
I don’t see a vulva. I see a sideways hand giving the middle finger.
That’s even more appropriate.
weirwoodtreehugger-Sign men up, too!
No, he’s not. But he’s white-passing and racist as fuck with his “race superiority” nonsense.
Shit, forgot to respond to WWTH: Fuck yeah, let’s start a gang!
That’s quite an odd typo, Misseb. XD
A nuclear cloud…in the shape…of a vagina.
I think I Roosh has jumped the shark.
Can I be in the roving witch mob too? I mean, if the roving witch mob is going to:
…you’re going to have to have someone who can draw blood samples to monitor testosterone levels (because, c’mon, saliva samples aren’t near as accurate or terror-inducing), and I’m a pretty good phlebotomist. Plus I have my own witch hat.
Warlocks are welcome as long as they’re white knight mangina betas.
I have read the comments on this ‘article’ and one of them is quite telling of their collective ignorance – jared thompson “This article worried me, in that the DEFCOCK3/4 places are mostly not politically stable and have low wages, so not a place to live for most men.” It is a well know fact that you can predict and measure the advancement of a society with they way in which it treats its women and minorities. If a society routinely mistreats women and the minorities, it is likely to be politically unstable, technologically backward, with little healthcare, loads of poverty, crime, infant mortality and other such issues. It is also reasonable to expect that such societies will not advance or develop in any meaningful way if it doesn’t let of go this bigotry. Places like Iran, Saudi Arabia and Pakistan are prime examples of this. Saudi Arabia may be considered ‘rich’, but this is only due to its oil reserves. Roughly 75% of budget revenues and 90% of export earnings come from the oil industry. So without oil it will be stuffed. It is also strongly dependent on foreign workers with about 80% of those employed in the private sector being non-Saudieast. It also has a very poor human rights record and its legal system sucks (as we all know). It is also affected by high poverty, child abuse and inbreeding.
As you go further down the DEFCOCK ‘system’ the countries mentioned have better treatment of women, is more technologically advanced and has higher standards of living.
As for DEFCOCK 1, well it seems like they are aware of the how women received the wrong end of the stick for centuries. For example in the Dark Ages, women were treated like chattle, had absolutely no rights and millions of women were killed in witch hunts. Men were seen as superior in every way. Women in places like Suadi Arabia are subjected to almost exactly what Roosh has described. Under Shria law, every adult female must have a male relative as her “guardian” and she needs his permission e in order to travel, study, or work. Women face discrimination in the courts, where the testimony of one man equals that of two women in family and inheritance law. Men have a unilateral right to divorce their wives , while woman can only obtain a divorce with the consent of her husband or judicially. There are even religious police, known as the mutawa, who impose many restrictions on women in public. These restrictions include forcing women to sit in separate specially designated family sections in restaurants, to wear hijab. Women are also forbidden to drive.
Roosh and his ilk are not only afraid of losing their supremacy, but they are terrified that one day the tables will be turned and that men will be subjected to the very things that women were subjected to. Which is why they believe that female equality is actually oppression.
Ref:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saudi_Arabia
Paradoxical Intention- I know!! ^^; I am literally laughing so heard at myself right now that there are tears in my eyes! That has got to be the most ironic typo ever made! OOPSIE!!!!
Eerr. Sorry, I meant sign ME up. Men have already had more of their share of witch hunting. ^^;
DUH! Another one! I meant I am laughing so HARD. What is up with me today? Sorry guys! ^^;
Haven’t read the other comments yet so apologiesbif this is a repeat, but am I the only one who noticed that (other than the line about heterosexuality) DEFCOCK 1 is pretty much exactly what Roosh wants, just with the genders reversed?
Funny how what he sees as a hell to run far far away from women are supposed to agree to willingly.
Isn’t Roosh all about the casual sex? Why is he suddenly showing interest in countries making casual sex “difficult to impossible”?
Yeah, I think that if Roosh actually went to a DEFCOCK 5 country he’d probably lose his head (the one on his shoulders, that is. Not the one he thinks with).
“For example in the Dark Ages, women were treated like chattle, had absolutely no rights and millions of women were killed in witch hunts. Men were seen as superior in every way.”
I am sorry but that is simply not true. During the medieval era (from around 600 to 1200) belief in witches was seen as superstitious and several church councils actually forbade condemning anyone as a witch, and there was widespread effort to curb fanaticism about witches. The penalties for witchcraft were relatively minor (like excommunication or penance). It wasn’t until around the 1400s or so (the Renaissance era) that witch-hunting actually became a common phenomenon, and it lasted until the late 1700s. During that time, the number of condemned witches (both male and female, although there were more women) was somewhere between 35,000 and 100,000, nowhere near “millions”.
You may have your own opinions but you don’t have a license to make up your own facts and statistics.
Likewise, women’s standing in society was actually relatively high during the late medieval period, arguably more so than it had been during the classical Roman era. Partly this was because monasticism was widespread, and this institution provided an alternative pathway for both men and women. There were many female philosophers and poets who were nuns. It only began to decline again following the Protestant Reformation (since the Reformers dissolved the monasteries, thus forcing ALL women into marriage, and early Protestantism had a much more “patriarchal” view of marriage than Catholicism had ever had. In addition some of the reformers, like John Knox, were raging misogynists).
The Whig view of history simply doesn’t stand up to the facts.
Fun fact: In 1968-1969, the US actually did have a roving witch mob!
That’s the Women’s International Terrorist Conspiracy from Hell. And they were a real thing.
It almost sounds like you’re describing the United States there. : /
“while experimenting with over 25 local and foreign penises to understand how their vaginas respond to various bad boy stimuli.”
Im picturing them wearing lab coats, it’s not a proper experiment without lab coats! It should take place in a controlled environment like the Katie institute of vagina studies, so outside influences don’t contaminate the data. Their research will be vital, cause they’ll have to learn to split the “bad boy” particles to create the vaginuclear bombs that leave the vagina shaped clouds. Science!