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Karen "GirlWritesWhat" Straughan accuses ex-AVFMers of using nude pics to try to lure her away from AVFM

The We Hunted the Mammoth Pledge Drive continues! If you haven’t already, please consider sending some bucks my way. (The PayPal page will say you are donating to Man Boobz.) Thanks!

Congratulations, A Voice for Men! You’ve caused me to feel an actual twinge of sympathy for a woman who once declared, on AVFM no less, that “[w]omen are facing a very real and grave problem in our culture: They are obnoxious [plural form of vagina-related slur redacted.]”

The c-word-slinging woman in question is former AVFM contributor and YouTube micro-celebrity Diana Davison, a friend to and frequent collaborator with another former AVFMer, the infamous “JohnTheOther” Hembling. The two have been sniping at AVFM in videos for months, and getting sniped back at in return, and have both become entangled in the wider war between AVFM and what seems to be virtually the entirety of the Men Going Their Own Way movement.

As Davison’s video above makes clear, this war is getting pretty ugly, with some AVFMers apparently circulating nude photos of Davison in an attempt to shut her up with some good old-fashioned slut-shaming.

The drama escalated dramatically about a week ago, when blabby antifeminist Youtuber Karen “GirlWritesWhat” Straughan — a longtime AVFM ally and “contributing editor” — launched into Davison and Hembling in a series of nasty YouTube comments, accusing Hembling of using the nude pics of Davison in an attempt to seduce Straughan into making a video attacking Paul Elam.

No, really. Here’s the relevant bit of one of her comments. (You’ll have to dig through the comments here to find the whole thing, as well as an assortment of other, well, interesting thoughts on AVFM.) I’ve highlighted the important bits.

John the Other … asked me to if I’d be willing to film a clip of myself Chris Crocker style, sobbing, “Leave Paul Elam ALONE!!!” after I’d repeatedly told him I was staying out of his bullshit with Paul. I’ve seen his girlfriends tits exactly three times, which was three times more than I’d asked to see them, and each time I was shown them I was told, “you’re smart, like me and John, not stupid like Paul and Dean and Sage Gerard and all those other guys at AVFM…”

Oh, and BTW, I’ve seen Diana completely buck, ass, [vagina-related slur redacted] and all. Not because I asked, either, but because apparently they thought it would bring me to their side. I have yet to see Paul in the altogether, and have no real desire to. YMMV.

On that very last point, my mileage definitely does not vary.

In another comment, she wrote that

John the Other and his girlfriend attempted to convince me to attack Paul Elam by showing me her tits and then telling me how smart I am.  … [H]e’s willing to put his girlfriend on the buffet table to lure me in, and she’s willing to offer herself up as lunch. 

The idea that Hembling is using nude pics of Davison to lure Straughan away from AVFM is a bizarre accusation, and Hembling has what appears to be pretty conclusive evidence — in the form of Skype chat logs of conversations with Straughan — that it’s complete bullshit. (You can watch his rambling video on the subject here; the relevant stuff starts 3:24 in. Hembling, who was ejected from AVFM last year, sounds a lot like someone who has recently escaped a cult.)

Natually, the AVFM regulars have responded to Davison’s video with their customary tact and aplomb. Here’s AVFM “Assistant Managing Editor” and “Director, Disqus Moderation Team” Suzanne McCarley, in the comments to Davison’s video:

Suzanne McCarley 1 day ago   What's with the accusations of slut shaming? I have no idea whether or not you're a slut; for all I know you're just a tease who never puts out. What I do know is that you have attempted to use your sexuality to manipulate no less than five influential MRAs before you found one who would take the bait.   You weren't giving it away, you were selling it to the highest bidder. I think that makes you a whore, not a slut, doesn't it?" Reply  ·  15

Elam, responding to McCarley’s comment, offered a slightly different assessment:

Paul Elam 1 day ago   With all respect I have to dissent from your opinion. Actual, real whores, are pretty honest. They tell you what you are getting and for how much. There is an honor to the transaction.   DD (not talking about her chest) is just a personality disordered cunt who whores herself figuratively, not for money but for control over other people. She doesn't even have the integrity to be a whore. Or the consistency. I note that she is now crowing about the futility of engaging feminists from her Feminism LOL channel, because the change of attitude serves her personal agenda.   John the Idiot just happened to be the one guy at AVFM who was one blowjob away from turning mangina when the Queen of Auschwitz showed up to swallow.   I saw the pics (wish I hadn't). Fucking gross.

The comments continue on in this vein for some time, with AVFMers accusing Hembling of supporting yet another woman (who, like Davison, was embraced by and then tossed out of AVFM)  because, in Elam’s words, “he was toying with the idea of fucking her at the time.”

This isn’t the first time that AVFMers have brought up Davison’s “chest.” Several months back, you may recall, AVFM’s “Chief Operations Officer” Dean Esmay accused Davison of using pics of her “titties” to lure MGTOWers to the anti-Paul-Elam Dark Side.

Now, it’s true that Davison is an anti-feminist ideologue with appalling ideas and a nasty rhetoricial style. She ends most of her YouTube videos with rape jokes. She regularly attacks other women as “cunts” and “narcissistic twats.” She thinks that men commit crimes mostly in order to get more stuff for the demanding women in their lives. She thinks that any woman who goes to sleep next to a man in bed is thereby giving him permission to penetrate her in her sleep. By joining up with the MGTOW movement as a weird sort of Female MGTOWer she’s siding with some of the internet’s skeeziest and most obsessive misogynists.

In other words, she’s at least as bad, ideologically speaking, as the AVFMers she now regularly attacks.

Nonetheless, she doesn’t deserve this sort of shit from AVFM assholes attempting to use attacks on her sexuality as a way to shut her up. No one does.

But apparently those at AVFM think this is how “human rights activism” is done.

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flagalicious
flagalicious
5 years ago

That thread this is happening on reveals a lot more than Elam and Straughn’s malice. Good example of the political starting off by looking personal. MGTOWs are getting a good dose of AVFM tactics and their anti-MRA position is hardening like concrete on a doomed mobster’s feet.

Vanir (@Vanir85)
5 years ago

Always interesting to get news from the cesspool that is the “manosphere”. I suppose people who base their world-view on hate and dogma (women are bad – so sayeth the biotroofs) will often end up in conflict. It really IS like watching diverging extremist cults go at it.

And also:

I have no idea whether or not you’re a slut; for all I know you’re just a tease who never puts out.

– Suzanne McCarley

*Sigh!* There really IS no making these people happy, is there?

sparky
sparky
5 years ago

Driver Suz and GWW are jumping on that disgusting slut-shaming bandwagon like they won’t get the exact same treatment when they fall out of favor. Yeah, no one, not even Diana Davidson, deserves that kin of treatment.

WithAZ
WithAZ
5 years ago

I’m curious to know whether Hembling actually nude pictures of his girlfriend to try to seduce a gay woman. On the one hand, it seems like such an ignorant and oblivious move that it’s literally unbelievable someone would do this; on the other hand, MRAs have consistently surprised me over the years with actions so shitty I couldn’t believe them to be real. So yeah, that about evens out.

because reasons
because reasons
5 years ago

Because it’s not slut shaming if I don’t have concrete, video evidence that you are, in fact, a slutty slut McSlutterson!

because reasons
because reasons
5 years ago

Good Lord! I didn’t know who Chanty Binx was so I did a google search and was bombarded with graphic images and websites full of dudebro haterage. I didn’t even click on anything. The list and thumbnail images were enough.

because reasons
because reasons
5 years ago

Whoops, wrong thread.

contrapangloss
5 years ago

Wow. Such activisim. Much human rights. Very classy. Wow.

…that was sarcasm. AVFM, you lose yet more points for trying to be decent humans. No “meets minimum acceptable standards” cookies today. Not that you’ve ever earned any, but definitely not today.

flagalicious
flagalicious
5 years ago

I see Nurdy Dancing has quit AVFM. She calls AVFM a “cluster f**k”. I guess AVFM will quit putting up the article she wrote for themevery week, calling it a “classic”. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w6O8afBQpmU

Luzbelitx
5 years ago

Ewww at all the slut-shaming. Stop it already!

As for the AVFM vs MGTOW war, it’s kinda like watching groups of monkeys flinging poo at each other…

Only monkeys are cute (sometimes).

Nate
Nate
5 years ago

Why is anyone surprised? Hate groups always fall apart to in-fighting.

M.
M.
5 years ago

Which states are these people in? Revenge porn is very illegal in many states.

Binjabreel
5 years ago

Re revenge porn:
Actually this is true, for some reason it’s like the one thing that it seems like the legislatures lept at doing something about.

Maybe the congresspeople were all terrified that someone would publicize all the dick pics they’d sent to people. Holy crap, I bet that *is* why.

Bina
Bina
5 years ago

They all so deserve each other…and yet they can’t stand each other. Irony is delicious, and so is this popcorn.

Adam
Adam
5 years ago

Good lord, these fucking people.

Mike
Mike
5 years ago

David, the link in your first paragraph (link text ‘once declared’) goes to a page which doesn’t contain the quote you refer to. I think you meant to use another link?

Machine Gun Sally
Machine Gun Sally
5 years ago

There is just so much awful here.

What struck me is how their politcs always boil down to men just viewing women as sex toys.

Why did he take her side? For sex, of course. Why would anyone agree with her? Sex! Therefore her nude photos must be nothing more than an “argument” in the world’s strangest debate.

And then their views of her are all her fault and they will mock and shame her for it. Pure class.

Paradoxical Intention
5 years ago

Wait, GWW is gay? Holy shit. How can someone who hates women as much as she does live with being sexually attracted to them? (Most likely the same way that MRAs deal with it, I guess, except with more “I’m a Special Snowflake and none of this applies to me”?)

Jeez. So quick to rip out each other’s throats, aren’t they?

blanktie
blanktie
5 years ago

How are her boobs going to lure people away from AVfM? It’s not like boob pictures are a well-constructed argument or anything. How would that even go…? My head hurts.

Robert
Robert
5 years ago

It’s like a bucket full of crabs, except none of them are actually trying to crawl out; they just keep pulling each other down anyway.

They don’t seem like happy people

suffrajitsu
suffrajitsu
5 years ago

When I saw the headline I thought Straughan was accusing someone of blackmailing her with nude photos of *her*, and I was like, that would be really fucked up, no matter how reprehensible her opinions are.

But trying to lure her away with nude photos of someone else…wait, what?

Shalimar
Shalimar
5 years ago

I’m pretty sure somewhere in that long rambling comment section yesterday, I read Straughan refer to herself as bi, not gay.

Jackie
Jackie
5 years ago

Can the serpent survive by eating its own tale? Long enough for its shit to start to choke it, it seems.

I do agree that Davison shouldn’t have to deal with this crap, but I don’t know whether to feel sorry, pity or just roll my eyes because of course this was going to happen. I can do all three I guess.

proxieme
proxieme
5 years ago

I don’t…I don’t even fully understand what’s happening in that mess.

It’s like watching especially vulgar middle schoolers in a yelling match.

Thalia
Thalia
5 years ago

I keep trying to figure out what the pictures were supposed to accomplish, but I got nothin’. It’s just horrible people being horrible to other horrible people in some kind of bizarre horrible-off. Or wait, is what’s her name, Straughan, gay? So she was supposed to keel over with lust if she saw a picture of a naked woman or something?

Nope, it’s still completely ridiculous. It’s all very Stalin and the purges, no? I wonder if they’re going to start making propaganda films showing how their GDP of plastic skulls is the world’s highest.

Aunt Edna
Aunt Edna
5 years ago

Oh. no — trouble in paradise! (Tittigate?)

It always pains me to see good relationships ripped apart by petty squabbling. Luckily, this isn’t such case.

Moggie
Moggie
5 years ago

Is there suddenly a desperate shortage of boob pics on the Internet?

Aunt Edna
Aunt Edna
5 years ago

@blanktie:

“How are her boobs going to lure people away from AVfM? It’s not like boob pictures are a well-constructed argument or anything. How would that even go…?”

It’s not just boobs, but boobs combined with ego-stroking for added irresistibility:

“John the Other and his girlfriend attempted to convince me to attack Paul Elam by showing me her tits and then telling me how smart I am.”

It’s a classic CIA recruitment technique. 😉

Linux
Linux
5 years ago

Paul Elam is totally sexy naked….for sure

Thats why he call other people “gross”

This woman is not a slut, she is a victim of stupid assholes.

freemage
5 years ago

I keep trying to figure out if this would be weirder if Straughn’s claims are true or false. It’s a bizarre accusation, but these are all such bizarre people that it can’t be ruled out. I do feel for Davison being subjected to the disgusting bullshit of revenge porn, though.

opium4themasses
5 years ago

Of Paul’s blog, John and Diane ran from there.
Attempted to lure Straughan with pics of DD’s pair.
Said Elam with a frown,
“Now COCK’s now run out of town.
This mess did not come otter nowhere.”.

Bina
Bina
5 years ago

“you’re smart, like me and John, not stupid like Paul and Dean and Sage Gerard and all those other guys at AVFM…”

Sheer. Comedy. GOLD.

Yeah, Karen, you’re smart…about as smart as a moldy potato chip. But then, so are all the people you mention, so don’t give yourself too many airs.

Also, gotta love Suzy…she just jumps right in with the biggest dose of playground slut-shaming of all. If you’re not a “slut”, you’re a “tease who never puts out”. Suz, don’t forget, you’re a woman. If this gross slut/tease dichotomy is how you see your whole gender, then which of the two are YOU? That kind of shit-talk is a bit less shocking coming from a man like Paulie, because one expects no better of a misodge…but if I hear it from a woman, I’m invariably baffled as to just what mental gymnastics she’s doing there. Does she think she can just magically transcend gendered oppression by refusing to recognize it in her own world? There are no special snowflakes, no matter how hard one tries to be one.

And what a bizarre way to show one’s “independence” from feminism, too: by hanging extra hard on the worst kind of talk one hears from men. Yeah, Suzy, you don’t need feminism at all. When you can out-hate your own sex better than those guys who are all secretly hating you, too, where is there left for you to go…except under the bus when they’re tired of you riding along?

Shalimar
Shalimar
5 years ago

Davison apparently has very nice boobs, according to everyone other than Elam, who says they’re “gross”. I’m with everyone who doesn’t understand how this was supposed to tempt Straughan into anything. They could be perfect, and they’re still something almost every other woman has, too.

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
5 years ago

… Am I misunderstanding something, or is GWW accusing John and Diana of spreading Diana’s pictures when it’s the AVFM crowd that’s actually circulating them (and presumably dug them up from somewhere)?

Or is there literally an email with a photo attachment and a message body saying “you’re smart like us?”

I need to know so I know who to be disgusted at and how disgusted to be.

Mewens
Mewens
5 years ago

I think you can just be disgusted with all of them at a 7-9 out of 10, Kirby. Covers your bases and seems like it’d be more-or-less appropriate.

Lam
Lam
5 years ago

Can someone please help me?

I was recently sexually assaulted by my friend which opened a conversation with some people about another woman. In short, she was just talking to a guy at college and they to her dorm. At one point when they were talking he started groping her. She backed away and started saying they should go and talking about her bf but he didnt stop. She never said explicitly “no” or similar. Now to me it was clearly sexual assault and she was obviously uncomfortable. Everyone else disagreed with me and said since she didnt say no that it wasn’t molestation, EVEN OTHER FEMINISTS.

Now I’m feeling sick and confused even about my own assault (I woke up to being molested and my hand pressed to his crotch but I was too scared to say anything) does it really just stop being sexual assault because she didnt say no?

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
5 years ago

@Mewens:

Yeah, that’s probably about right. I’m kinda digging through the youtube comments where GWW said her piece, and christ… Makes me realize how isolated I am from these people both online and in real life when I have to keep reminding myself that these are real people that actually believe the things they believe.

It’s easier when it’s just petty sniping, but then they launch into a diatribe about the MRM and I have to remind myself that that bullshit is just as real as the sniping.

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
5 years ago

@Lam:

Everyone else disagreed with me and said since she didnt say no that it wasn’t molestation, EVEN OTHER FEMINISTS.

Then they are terrible people.

There is an open thread way back here if you want to talk about stuff in detail with folks. But long story short, consent requires a yes, not the absence of a no. That’s it.

But more importantly, assault doesn’t care about the words that were said. If you were not comfortable with what was happening, was not asked, are not willing, then that is assault. Nobody can invalidate your experience through what was or wasn’t said.

Lam
Lam
5 years ago

@kirbywarp thank you for the link

Paradoxical Intention
5 years ago

@Lam: Go talk to someone. Anyone. Get authority figures involved. Absence of a “no” is not consent.

Consent is a two things: Continued verbal agreement, and active participation.

Your friend kept talking about their boyfriend and how they should go (no verbal agreement, continued or otherwise), and they backed away and tried to break contact (this is actively trying to STOP the thing from happening).

Anyone who says it wasn’t sexual assault is a terrible person, feminist or otherwise.

Here’s a couple links to things that might help your case with other people.

Link one

Link two

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
5 years ago

@Lam:

No problem. It’s not very active at the moment, and I don’t tend to participate, but I’m sure if you post something people will respond. There’s a lot of great people who could probably offer awesome support.

Sorry about what happened to you. I hope you’re doing ok apart from the whole “people suddenly bringing out the random horrid beliefs” thing.

Now back to reading GWW explain how feminism is actually an extreme form of traditionalism.

… yeah.

Shalimar
Shalimar
5 years ago

Kirbywarp, from what I have read, deciphering all the back and forth bullshit and allegations, it sounds like John and Diana did give the pictures to at least a few friends. They don’t seem to have given them directly to GWW or Elam or the vast majority of the AVM assholes who are spreading them around without her consent.

It’s confusing, because Diana seems a lot more outraged about GWW lying and saying Diana and John gave them to her so she would leave AVM than about everyone passing around naked pictures of her.

sn0rkmaiden
5 years ago

I was reading through those comments last night and they kept going on about how Woolly Bumblebee got kicked of AVFM because she was appropriating money intended for the Earl Silverman fund? Does anyone know if there’s any truth to that? I thought she just fell from grace because she was upsetting the MGTOW?

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
5 years ago

@Shalimar:

That’s the sense I got as well. I haven’t watched Diana’s video yet, but if what GWW is saying is somewhat accurate, then Diana is mostly amused at the idea that her pictures are causing such discord and being blamed for bringing down AVFM.

What a bizarre bunch.

But yeah, to second David. “Nonetheless, she doesn’t deserve this sort of shit from AVFM assholes attempting to use attacks on her sexuality as a way to shut her up. No one does.”

freemage
5 years ago

Lam: One thing to include in future conversations, if need be: Many women will fear, justifiably, that saying “no” explicitly will cause their attacker to escalate. There’s a feeling that this will end ‘negotiations’, and just lead to physical force and harm. In addition, of course, there’s also the shock from having your trust violated by an acquaintance.

Both scenarios you describe are, in no uncertain terms, sexual assault. They would be nigh-impossible to prosecute in the current environment, and likely even in one that didn’t just suck like the one we have now, but that doesn’t change the fact that they represent a violation of consent and boundaries that SHOULD be inviolate. I’m sorry that happened to you, and to your friend, and hope you both have some sort of support available to you.

contrapangloss
5 years ago

Lam, I am so sorry you went through that.

What you’ve described is totally and completely sexual assault.

Paradoxical Intention dropped some nice poetic links, that folks should read at least once, and Kirby did the nice succinct thing. If you want more resources, I can try to dig up a few.

Drop a line on the open thread (because trolls aren’t allowed there, and trolls can be awful) if you want them.

In the interim, can I offer you a floofy fox that wants to be your best friend?comment image

Or kitty hugs:
http://1funny.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/11/46297__pic.jpg

Linax5
Linax5
5 years ago

Are they adults or 10 years old whiny children?

Poor woman….this is the true face of AVFM, they re shaming women they disagree with.

Spindrift
Spindrift
5 years ago

@Lam
Chiming in with everyone to say what you described was totally sexual assault, and those people who said it wasn’t are aweful people. I’m sorry that happened to you.

suffrajitsu
suffrajitsu
5 years ago

@Lam

I’m very sorry this happened to you. Consent is the presence of a “yes”, not an absence of a “no,” so yes, you and she were sexually assaulted. California, in fact, recently took legislative action to make “yes means yes” the official legal model for consent instead of “no means no.”

Are you in college as well? If you don’t want to report your assault (which is entirely understandable), you might want to see if your school has any counseling services for survivors. My college campus has several group counseling services, including one support group specifically for survivors of sexual assault.