The far right racist douchebag-o-sphere has been warning us for some time that Cultural Marxism works insidiously to destroy Western Culture and make women all frumpy and shit. Well, you’ll never guess just how sneaky these Cultural Marxist plotters really are: apparently they have the power to cause women to repeatedly drop their iPhones.
In a new post on Roosh V’s Return of Kings site, some dude called Theodore Gumbril dissects what he sees as the increasing “Degeneracy Of London’s Women.” The four signs of this ongoing Lady-pocalypse?
1) Cracked iPhone screens
Gumbril reports with horror that “London is full of iPhones with broken screens, the majority of them owned by women.” Why? Brace yourself: it’s because these women use their iPhones a lot, and therefore also drop them a lot. No, really — one of them actually ran into Gumbril on the sidewalk, quite literally, as he was walking along minding his own business and pondering just how degenerate London women are becoming.
Even in busy areas of London, British women are walking around intently staring into their iPhones, earphones in, oblivious to all around them as they bathe in Facebook likes and Tinder swipes from thirsty male supplicants online. A girl doing this walked into me on Tottenham Court Road a few weeks ago. I was chastised with an indignant yelp of protestation. It is, of course, men’s duty to move out of the way promptly when this happens.
Yeah, it’s not as if dudes ever march down the sidewalk oblivious to the world around them. Never ever seen that happen. Nope.
Oh, but it gets worse:
2) Women wearing sneakers with business suits on the way home from work
Nothing betrays a Sheryl Sandberg-clone femcunt like sports shoes with business attire. In London, this is the exclusive preserve of Anglo women who have brought into the myth of office-cubicle empowerment. I have yet to see this ghastly mismatch of styles in women from Eastern Europe or Russia.
Huh. I’m pretty sure women in the US started wearing sneakers — known in the UK as “lorries” — on their way home from work way back in the 1980s. You might think they did this because their feet hurt after wearing uncomfortable heels all day, and because they didn’t feel obligated to dress up for random schlubs on the subway. You would be wrong. It was Cultural Marxism all along!
3) Women wearing leggings as pants
“This fashion trend,” Gumbril declares, “is a Chernobyl-level disaster in the field of female attire, and an egregious affront to all decency.” Why? Because this shameless immodesty is a disgrace, an assault on all decent men, at least when the women’s butts are, you know, fat.
4) Increasingly androgynous women (who won’t give Gumbril their phone numbers)
After lamenting “the distinct and often brash lack of femininity” of today’s London women, Gumbril tells this horrifying story of what happened when he tried to pick up one of these women, for some reason:
Over the weekend, I had an unpleasant experience opening an Audrey Hepburn lookalike.
I’m just hoping he means he “opened” her in the pickup artist sense and not in the serial killer sense.
What struck me about this distasteful set, aside from the the snarky disdain and aggressive, relentless shit testing, was the fashion—high cut bangs, a formless cream coat, boy trousers, and boy shoes.
The style is an instant erection killer, and (unfortunately) increasingly common.
Er, quick question: if you think the existence of women like these are a sign of the Cultural Marxist apocalypse, and if the sight of them causes your permaboner to shrink, WHY DID YOU TRY TO PICK HER UP? You’re not actually obligated to start a conversation with anyone or anything you can, at least in theory, put your penis into.
Anyhoo, this dire state of affairs, Gumbril tells us, is all the fault of Cultural Marxism and the evil elites promulgating it, who for some reason benefit when women wear sneakers with business suits.
Similar to the Soviets’ New Socialist Man, the New Feminist Woman is a grotesque pastiche of anti-femininity, Kurzweilian automation, and repugnant narcissism taken to depraved extremes. The men who have to come to terms with these women must deal with androgynous, unfeminine women who are addicted to their iPhones and who live at the centre [of] a CERN-like attention vortex driven by real life and social media validation.
So I guess the only solution is for Gumbril and other dudes who think like him to stop giving these women their attention.
Somehow I suspect this proposal will be acceptable to the women of the world as well.
NOTE: Sneakers are not actually referred to as “lorries” in the U.K. I was just making a joke. They are actually known as “spotted dicks.”
ScarletAthena | March 11, 2015 at 2:39 pm
There is an interesting article that men (and some women) in the US are using cracked iPhone screens as a sign of status. Kind of liked ripped jeans, it’s a sort of “rebel” trend. (I don’t know if it’s still in style, as I don’t own, nor do I want to own, an iPhone, but eh.)
http://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/style/beat-up-cellphones-with-cracked-screens-are-point-of-pride-for-some-young-people/2013/05/17/0334ebe0-be36-11e2-89c9-3be8095fe767_story.html
Add another tick to “Do as I (a man) say, not as I (a man) do, feeeemales!”.
And we can add another tick to “[Number] Fashion Trends Men Hate!”
And another to “My boner comes before your comfort/safety/well-being/emotions!”
And another to the long list of transphobia.
British people sure talk funny all right. I mean, they call the trunk of their car a boot, and they call their boots Wellies, obviously they have no leg to stand on when they complain that we Yanks drive on our parkways and park on our driveways.
“… They walk on all fours?”
I know, total nerdfail, right? People in the know know that the two-legged walking tanks in Star Wars are AT-ST’s.
With me being a Londoner, living in the Eastend he’s obviously a bloody tourist, five minute schlepping round with our crappy potholed pavements and you need hikies not trainers (I hope it stays as I spelt it)
“Wait, I thought “spotted dicks” referred to PUAs.”
Just to Roosh.
I second that it’s hilarious he found an Audrey Hepburn lookalike and said her style was terrible!!
This is the woman acknowledged to be one of the great style icons of the last century?
Judging from some of the manosphere fashion tips of the recent past, their idea of truly feminine – dangerously high heels, long hair, tight clothes, nylons, chiselled physique and hyper-feminine – is what the rest of us might identify as ‘drag’.
Who the hell gets this worked up about strangers’ attire in a busy, crowded street?
Nobody is supposed to look directly at anyone else in London anyway. Stupid fucking tourist.
Off topic, but speaking of whiny oppressed white guys, the comments on this article are a gold mine.
http://gizmodo.com/the-great-internet-debate-over-not-reading-white-men-1690376231
@Friday,
They also call their pants ‘trousers’ and their underwear ‘pants’. Some of them call a sandwich a ‘butty’… which makes sandwiches sound not very appealing, to be honest, at the same time they call their garbage trucks ‘dustcarts’, which makes them sound like something adorable.
Kind of like calling their industrial dumpsters ‘skips’. It sounds so… cute.
Then again, they probably think a lot of Americanisms are weird.
Heck, I think some Americanisms are weird (and I’m an American)
What is with you lot and your insistence on calling snowmachines ‘snowmobiles’? They’re snowmachines, darn it.
It’s incredible how much they care about clothing, even their own. They have such a rigid view of how everything should be, and anything that departs from that rigid ideal is a sign of degeneracy.
Also, that ideal is set about 50 years in the past.
Also boggling is watching them talk about people as if their “nationality” (by looks, anyway) were their species. “British women” do this, “Russian women” do that, anyone who isn’t observably British in London is automatically a foreigner independent of how long they or their families have lived there, and foreigners are bad because reasons.
One commenter described the restaurants in an area as ” immigrant take out places.”
I mean… huh?
It’s like he pictures people as Risk figures marked eternally by their country of birth, and views every movement of people from one place to another as an invasion.
It’s screeds like this that make you realise that, for all their pretention and grandiloquence, these guys at RoK can’t write for shit. What in the same of All-Holy-Fuck is a CERN-like attention vortex? What properties does it have in common with CERN? So, it’s an attention vortex that’s like a widely respected scientific institute?
I get that he’s referring to the LHC, the particle accelerator built by CERN that had the alarmist media in a tizz over the completely imaginary possibility of creating a black hole and destroying the universe, or something, but if you’re going to compare a thing to another thing, you have to make sure that those things have a thing in common.
As a guy who has lived in London for over thirty-five years, I don’t recognise this town he’s talking about. EIther he’s from an alternate reality, or he’s referring to London Ontario. I wouldn’t put it past those sneaky Canadians to have a Tottenham Court Road there, just to confuse people further.
Useless trivia time:
The trend of athletic shoes with business ware started in the early 80’s (I believe) in New York (IIR) when there was a big transit strike. Commuters had to walk to/from work so women would wear sneakers and change into their dress shoes, predominantly heels, at work. Once the strike was over, comfort kept the trend going.
@Lisa C:
The judgement seems to be: terrible, awful things that should have never been invented, unless the women wearing them is hot. Like… literally, one of the commenters said he couldn’t fully condemn yoga pants because some women look attractive in them.
“CERN like attention vortex”???
Incomprehensible Manosphere simile of the day!
Also, “femcunts”? Pretty sure most actual vaginas are female. Was that for emphasis? As in, ‘I’m definitely talking about female genitalia? One wonders where these garbage humans learned to use language. In their own echo chamber of the jerks, I suspect.
Sometimes I walk over my lunch break and I keep my heels on because they are comfortable and I don’t feel like changing. Once a man stopped to tell me that “we need to get you some walking shoes!” So either he’s a mangina or they can’t make up their damn minds about what we are supposed to do.
@Emmy Rae
It’s the latter. We’re supposed to dress sexy but not reveal any physique. Butts oppress men so make sure yours are well covered, ladies! But seriously if your appearance doesn’t please boners you are worthless. Bear in mind though that it’s unfair to wear a top that displays a crack of cleavage and expect a man to control himself around you, so don’t wear that top. T-shirts for all females! However you must be visually appealing at all times and wearing a T-shirt makes you look like a man, so don’t wear them. Remember to dress slutty but not look like a slut. Kthxbai.
Errr – Audrey Hepburn totally rocked slacks (trans from UK English – Pants)
See this site http://fashiongear.fibre2fashion.com/fashionculture/index.aspx?articleid=2174&pageno=3
I’m worried that the steelcap boots I wear to work aren’t sufficiently unfeminine. Can someone advise? It’s just that I live in the bush and need to hike to the train station to get to my office job, and heels are problematic on unsealed mud roads.
I can guarantee I don’t wear leggings, just black jeans and a black t-shirt. I don’t have an iPhone, but my phone is cracked, because my toddler tossed it across a room – is that an acceptable cracking?
I know some people who think this is hip:
http://laughingsquid.com/stickers-that-make-an-iphone-or-ipad-look-like-they-have-a-cracked-screen-by-thinkgeek/
Well, only about 60km from London, Ontario, there’s also a Stratford which happens to sit on the Avon river and which has a large Shakespearean festival every year. The early 1800s settlers in Ontario really loved their English place names. (York, Windsor, Oxford County, Middlesex County, Essex County, Northumberland, Durham, Uxbridge… I could keep going for a long while.)
That said, no, I don’t believe London, Ontario has a Tottenham Court Road.
So, wait… the *women* are driven by social media validation? Hmmm. Ummmmmm. Huh.
That sounds like a really uncomfortable and inefficient way to get around. I guess it’s good that mesmerizing the male gaze is not my primary goal when I leave the house. I usually have shit to do.
This also makes me feel even better about the lovely burgundy hiking boots I bought today. They were definitely not designed to mesmerize anybody. They were designed to get me up mountains. (Sorry for the detour about boots. I have a hiking trip planned for next month and I’m already super excited!)
“Er, quick question: if you think the existence of women like these are a sign of the Cultural Marxist apocalypse, and if the sight of them causes your permaboner to shrink, WHY DID YOU TRY TO PICK HER UP?”
Those grapes are ever so sour..
If he had come across a heavily made up woman in a skirt and heels I’m sure he would have gone on a rant about how women are attention-starved whores.