In his must-read GQ story on A Voice for Men’s conference last summer, Jeff Sharlet detailed an unsettling encounter between his friend Blair and AVFM’s “collegiate activism director” Sage Gerard, who, Blair told Sharlet, crudely propositioned her and gave her “the most unconsensual hug I have ever known.” (I wrote about it here.)
Now Gerard has offered a rebuttal of sorts to Sharlet’s article and, well, it’s nearly as creepy as the incident itself. Gerard admits that he was indeed flirting with her and that, yes, “[m]y talking to her included a reassuring knee pat and a hug.”
He also claims that Blair was literally hired by GQ in order to flirt with men at the conference and lure one or more of them into raping her.
Gerard starts off by declaring, with no evidence whatsoever, that Blair was a “plant hired specifically to flirt with men and get GQ a story.”
Then his accusations get even uglier:
Blair’s job was to get raped.
Jeff [Sharlet] wanted that to happen, not MHRAs [Men’s Human Rights Activists]. Blair would play Seven Minutes in Heaven if it got Jeff a rape story. She was there to confirm a presumption that MHRAs, MGTOWs or other red-pill folk are incapable of self-control and are ready to rape at a moment’s notice.
Happily for Gerard, he writes, he was able to see through this subterfuge in time, I guess, to keep from raping her.
Unfortunately for Jeff, I have an ability to detect manipulation, and I do not think with my dick. He calibrated his bear trap to clamp shut on a hug-trigger, which meant he could try to make me look like a pervert even with totally appropriate physical contact. Since he was obviously desperate to catch prey, his trap misfired and merely ripped my jeans without biting me to a standstill. Having narrowly evaded pseudo-journalistic “capture,” I can easily show you that Blair was, indeed, a trap.
He then proceeds to “show us” absolutely nothing that backs up this accusation. After briefly describing his conversation with Blair, which (aside from the “reassuring knee pat” and unconsensual hug) dealt with a friend of Blair’s who claims he’s been falsely accused of rape, he wrote.
I never intend to sleep with strangers, but Jeff framed this interaction as me using Blair’s pain as an excuse to eat her out.
I have no idea where that last bit came from either.
He follows this with a bunch of rape jokes I won’t bother to quote.
I’m not quite sure how Gerard expects that writing this creepy-as-hell post will somehow make him seem like less of a creep.
http://media0.giphy.com/media/KZvT5AWF4ADAI/200_s.gif
I feel a little dirty reading this. Poor Miss. Blair.
At this point, I’m convinced that nothing will get these socially unsocialized nerds to acknowledge any sort of wrongdoing. I have never, ever, seen a single one of them admit to having been in the wrong unless it was to frame themselves as nice guys caught up in some sperm-stealing harpy’s web.
And, again, the MRAs go out of their way to prove that they are not gross, rapey creeps by…acting like gross, rapey creeps.
And, for fuck’s sake, it doesn’t matter what you think of the “appropriateness” of a hug, if she doesn’t want it, it’s not appropriate. Fucking period full stop end of the line all change fucking DONE.
I read his article to get the best sense of context possible, and it definitely sounds like he’s saying that the only reason that he didn’t rape her was because he figured out that it was (allegedly) a trap. I realize that that’s not how he meant to make it sound, but that is how it sounds.
He also seems unaware of why the hugging and knee-patting were not perfectly appropriate gestures. Here’s his version of what happened. (Spoiler alert: it’s exactly the same as the GQ version of the story.)
So, according to Gerard, he, not Braverman, asked to go talk in private. Not seeing where she laid her supposed trap here. (If she did indeed lay a trap, it was probably to see what they’d say about false rape accusations.)
His suggestion here sounds exactly as stupid and unhelpful as it did when Shartlet reported it.
Except in Gerard’s world, a knee pat is a “mixed signal” when a woman does it to a man, not a gesture of comfort. He can’t suddenly turn around and spin it into a comforting gesture, especially when there are plenty of people, including me, out there who consider leg-touching to be an inappropriately sexual gesture when done by someone with whom I do not already have a sexual relationship. and feel uncomfortable when someone does it. As for the hug, it is generally considered a weird invasion of space to hug a stranger, and many people do use the gesture to get physically closer to people to whom they are attracted without being overtly sexual. Furthermore, given that Blair described the hug as feeling non-consensual, I would guess that she probably gave off signals of discomfort that Gerard ignored as he was going in to hug her.
THERE ARE OTHER WAYS OF COMFORTING PEOPLE THAT DON’T INVOLVE TOUCHING THEM, YOU DIPSHIT!
Right. Because getting her to compose a poem is really going to help her friend. So much better than giving her advice on how to be a good character witness if his case goes to trial or something that could, ya know, actually help a man potentially falsely accused of rape.
I’m just baffled as to why these people are so incepredibly obsessed with rape. Why?
http://ct.fra.bz/ol/fz/sw/i48/5/2/12/fbz_3948f066c54214b9b2252ed900eea064.jpg
This is how I feel just reading his creeptastic mind-horror. I can’t imagine how Blair must have felt during his “reassuring knee pat”… I want to scrape off my knees just thinking about it.
What a creepy creepy person.
Grumpy deer doesn’t approve of unwanted hugs!
http://www.thecutereport.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/cute_animal.jpg
I think that ‘Sage Gerard’ is probably the least socially aware person ever. Pats on knee and ‘reassuring’ hugs to virtual strangers are never a good idea, and has been pointed out, he was the one who sought privacy, so the whole trap thing is rather redundant, unless he is claiming that Blair manipulated his thoughts with her amazing psychic powers.
And that photo makes him look SO strange, does he not see that the weird half smile and staring eyes are NOT helping?!
These guys have a disturbing fixation on the idea of this Blair woman getting raped. Somehow they can’t seem to joke about her, flirt with her, accuse her of shit, or explain their behavior around her without it being about her rape. Now where would anyone get the idea that red pill folk are creepy as fuck if this is right where their mind goes (and apparently stays) upon meeting an attractive woman?
Oh MRAs. It seems there is absolutely nothing you can do to make your movement not look like a threat to society. Every time you open your mouths you dig deeper and deeper.
alaisvex:
QFT. Even if Jeff Sharlet had specifically hired Blair to flirt with men at the AVFM conference (which is highly, highly, highly unlikely), then expectation that rape is a likely outcome of that flirtation is just so many layers of wrong.
Is this guy the reason they invented the “christian side hug”?
@sunnysombrera
It’s like watching them try to extinguish a fire by violently throwing barrels of kerosene at it.
“He calibrated his bear trap to clamp shut on a hug-trigger”
“He calibrated his bear trap to clamp shut on a hug-trigger”
“He calibrated his bear trap to clamp shut on a hug-trigger”
I can’t get over this phrase. I’ve never seen the English language do that.
“his trap misfired and merely ripped my jeans without biting me to a standstill”
I hear this in Eminem’s voice for some reason.
Those Guys appear to be total creeps….
Accidentally clicked on the link to the full post. OH MY GOD THE HEADER IMAGE WHY.
Fucking hell. “Her job was to get raped” implies that there’s something she could do to somehow trick them into raping her. New rule: if you’ve ever looked at a woman and thought “she’s trying to get raped”, you need to report yourself to the authorities immediately, because you’re almost certainly a rapist.
No longer surprised at the lengths they will go to to be utterly creepy.
At the risk of stating the obvious, if your hug doesn’t reassure the person you’re hugging, it’s not a reassuring hug.
Now that they’ve invented this scenario out of nothing, how long until MRAs start debating if a hired rape victim is really being raped?
This is definitely the most literal “she was asking for it” defense imaginable. Icky to the max.
I…I feel the need for some fire.
I just… what kinda accusation is that?! Her job was not “to be raped”! Holy–! I CANNOT! NOPE! NOPE!
*headdesks for eternity*