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A Voice for Men Paul Elam and pals rebut GQ article depicting them as creepy misogynists by acting like creepy misogynists

"Pretty girls" are always up to something
“Pretty girls” are always up to something

If you’ve read Jeff Sharlet’s magnificent GQ account of his lost weekend amongst the “Men’s Human Rights Activists” at A Voice for Men’s conference last summer (or my take on it here), you know that some of the creepiest moments his account involved his friend Blair, a twentysomething writer who came along for the ride and ended up, by her account, being groped and propositioned by AVFM’s “director of collegiate activism” Sage Gerard.

Sharlet never mentions Blair’s last name, but Elam outs her in a AVFM post with the lovely title “GQ’s Jeff Sharlet pimps out Blair Braverman for clickbait.”

Braverman, like her friend Sharlet, is a writer. As in, a real writer, someone who’s won awards, whose work has been included in a number of anthologies, and who has a book coming out soon from Ecco/HarperCollins.

Elam must be aware of this – he links to her website, where all of this information is easily found – but for some reason doesn’t mention it. Perhaps because Braverman, less than half his age, is being published by, you know, an actual big-name publishing house, while Elam will never be published by anything more prestigious than Paul Elam Press? (Sorry, Zeta Press. Because Paul is a Zeta male, a term he made up to describe the best kind of male.)

Whatever the reason, Elam is content to portray “pretty young Blair,” whom he refers to repeatedly as a “girl,” as little more than a sort of journalistic honey trap brought to the conference in order to lure the men there into, I guess, acting like the predatory creeps they are?

He also writes that Blair, who trains and races sled dogs, “is into dogs, but I want to make it perfectly clear that I don’t mean that in a sexual way.”

Brilliant, Paul. You’re attempting to rebut a GQ piece that reveals you and your male followers to be a bunch of misogynistic assholes who are constantly saying inappropriately sexual things about (and to) every woman they find attractive …  by being a misogynistic asshole saying inappropriately sexual things about a woman you find attractive.

Unexpectedly, Elam’s comrades at AVFM, in their comments on his article, eschew crude sexual comments and focus on substantive points.

Just kidding! They’re worse. Including the women.

Tara Palmatier, a clinical psychologist who has affixed herself firmly to AVFM and who co-hosts a regular Youtube show with Elam, writes of Braverman in something other than clinical terms, describing her as “a disingenuous doe-eyed (one eye slightly smaller than the other and just a smidge crossed) wannabe double agent,” adding:

Yo, MSM, next time you want to employ a “honey trap” to infiltrate the MHRM conference, spring a few more bucks for a more tempting and believable honey trap. Think Julian Assange grade.

AVFM’s “activism director” Attila Vinczer – we’ve met him before – pipes up with a weird and exceedingly creepy, er, appreciation of Braverman that may well make your skin crawl:

I sure recall Blair Braverman joining us in the lobby sporting her dark short shorts, shifting legs crossing one over the other and back again, rosy cheeks, blushing. Flirtatious? Hmmm. What other behaviour should she have had, being warned she would be raped?

One must wonder, just what exactly was their collective intention? Well, judging by the pathetic Jeff Sharlet hack article, it is clear, they were looking for that sizzle. What better plan than bring a young woman, dressed and behaving seductively provocative, to lure some unsuspecting guy like a pretty nerium oleander. We recognized the poison this pretty flower had in store and sent her packing.

Apparently all young women wearing shorts in June, and having legs that occasionally move, are trying to seduce creepy misogynistic assholes twice their age.

Dean Esmay, AVFM’s “managing editor” and “chief operations officer,” adds his two cents:

I remember noticing Blair and thinking she was an eye candy distraction whose job was to flirt with guys, and then thinking “nah don’t be sexist, she’s just nice.”

My bad. She was there specifically to be a distraction

A young woman being a young woman in the presence of Men’s Rights Activists – a clear case of entrapment!

Longtime AVFM regular “Andybob” had some questions.

I wonder how Sharlet prepped Blair Braverman for her role – apart from brushing the dog hairs off her person and instructing her to lose the goats. Did he coach her on how to drop a variety of rape jokes and references into conversations, or did she come up with it all on her own?

I’ve seen no indication that Braverman was prepped, or made any rape jokes, or attended the conference as anything other than a curious (and ultimately quite horrified) visitor. (The bit about goats is a reference to one of the photos AVFM filched from Braverman’s Facebook page and used to illustrate the article.)

GQ’s Sharlet – you know, the actual author of the piece that has the AVFMers so enraged – got some criticism as well. AVFM regular ManWithPlan referred snidely to Sharlet’s alleged “fat rolls.” Palmatier, a bit more creative, wrote that

Sharlet-tan gave me the heebie jeebies from his first cold, slimy amphibian-like approach. (Are slugs amphibians? That’s what he reminded me of.)

Oddly, none of the AVFMers accused Sharlet of trying to seduce them by crossing and uncrossing his legs.

NOTE: Yeah, I used that cartoon once before. But. come on, it’s awesome.

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RaikonL
RaikonL
9 years ago

My favourite part is actually the confused dude who thinks Slugs are amphibians.

Lea
Lea
9 years ago

Own goal.

Again.

teuthic
teuthic
9 years ago

Is it just me, or does Attilla Vinczer write like he’s trying to ape Lovecraft? He has the same retrograde beliefs, too.

Also hello! Shut up, Woody.

M.
M.
9 years ago

Sadly, the only surprising thing about this is that Elam didn’t post her address and phone number.

Lea
Lea
9 years ago

Dear MRAs,

When you are wrong it doesn’t matter if the people who tell you you’re wrong are fat, young or even female. You’re still wrong.

Jarnsaxa
Jarnsaxa
9 years ago

Well of course they’re all Admiral Ackbaring and screaming “It’s a trap” baloney, because she’s a woman. They think all women are traps, cis hetero lesbian transwomen and everyone else too. We’re all evil to them.

sheehank
9 years ago

Sauce on that comic please.

Charles RB
Charles RB
9 years ago

So it was a hack job for a journalist to repeat exactly what people say to a known journalist.

Alrighty.

loganbacon
loganbacon
9 years ago

Ugh. What a bunch of disgusting pigs. Paul doesn’t catch on that guys who actually get laid don’t feel the need to brag about how much they get laid. Because I don’t for a moment believe that a guy with his personality actually attracts real women.

Aunt Edna
Aunt Edna
9 years ago

For a psychologist, Dr. P behaves in a brazenly unprofessional way.

That seem to be the standard, I noticed, among the (so-called) mental health professionals who associate themselves with TRP / MRA. They say things that are not only wildly inappropriate for someone in their field and position, but make one sincerely doubt their expertise (as well as their grasp of reality).

If state boards of professional regulations and professional organizations took their jobs (such as they are) seriously, they would at least admonish these individuals and remind them of their responsibility when speaking out in a professional capacity on public forums.

Alas.

Lea
Lea
9 years ago

I’m still reeling.
Did Elam and crew really just suggest Blair had it coming? That the rape jokes were hers and she was there to seduce them into groping her? If a young attractive woman was bait, exactly what do they imply she was being used to catch?

They’re blaming her for the rape jokes, the “proposals”, the proposition and the unwanted touching?

They are blaming a woman for men’s treatment of her and saying it is what she “really” wanted.

They actually brought up her clothes as if seeing some thigh excuses them being super creepy.

They aren’t even saying that they didn’t skeeve all over her. They’re just blaming and shaming her.

The guys who claim 12 yr olds shouldn’t be able to “ruin men’s lives” when those men rape them.

The guys who so often claim that false accusations of rape, harassment and domestic violence from women and girls are epidemic and has happened to quite a few of them. It seems to have happened far more than stats imply they should. Either the stats are wrong or…

My mind is having trouble with how they could write that and not notice that it sounds like every other “She had it coming” they’ve spewed.

Aunt Edna
Aunt Edna
9 years ago

@Charles RB:

“So it was a hack job for a journalist to repeat exactly what people say to a known journalist.”

Yes, it is the hackiest of them all. It is like forcing them to look in the mirror — with predictable results (anger, and denial, and then some).

Flying Mouse
Flying Mouse
9 years ago

Y’know, the stuff that happened to Blair and in her presence was foul, and she’s a braver woman than I’ll ever be (both to endure that mess and to let Jeff Sharlet include her in the piece). But according to the article those fellas weren’t exactly on their best behavior even when a pretty lady wasn’t around. Even if Sharlet hadn’t had a “trap” in the form of a woman in shorts, he would have come away with plenty of horror stories. I think the only clickbaiting going on is at AVfM. We all know how much those fellows love taking a woman down a peg or twenty.

Sarah
Sarah
9 years ago

Wait, she *blushed*??? … the whore.

I find it fascinating the resentment with which they talk about a woman being attractive.
They hate what they deem unattractive women for not dying to please them, but I they absolutely loathe those who dare be attractive in their eyes and not offer them sex (they’d also hate those who sleep with them and call them sluts). It’s like the ultimate offence. How dare they exist oblivious of men’s boners’ rights.

Fnoicby
Fnoicby
9 years ago

The most fascinating and revealing part of the whole GQ article to me was Blair sitting in the stairwell with “nice guy” Sage Gerard. And not even the groping part. Him trying to “teach” her how to write poetry – as if she was a child. Such incredible disrespect in his attitude towards her during the whole exchange. The only possibility in his mind seemed to be that she was of a far inferior intellect than he. He didn’t gather his from talking to her. It made my skin crawl.

Lady Mondegreen
Lady Mondegreen
9 years ago

We recognized the poison this pretty flower had in store and sent her packing

When did this happen? After the after-party she attended? As in, they sent her packing after the conference was over?

Whatever. They totes “sent her packing”! In their minds. After they found out her friend’s write-up wasn’t complimentary.

Hey, dudes, remember that time the Lizard People attacked the conference, and you were all like, “GET OUT OF HERE LIZARD PEOPLE WE ARE ALPHA MANLY MEN GRRR” and the Lizard People were like, squealing in fear and they ran away and hopped in their multi-dimensional space ships and hightailed it out of there? That was good, too.

Lea
Lea
9 years ago

Did Elam ever state clearly that 12 yr olds should not feel grateful to old pedos because old pedos are probably better lovers than other children?

Because I’d have said that waaaaay before I made a bestiality joke were I writing that rebuttal.

Lea
Lea
9 years ago

We recognized the poison this pretty flower had in store and sent her packing

He thinks he’s Sam Spade.

Ellesar
9 years ago

If Blair had worn a loose floor length skirt they would have criticised that too – let’s face it these men look for every single possible way they can blame women for everything.

She was there with a journalist, and even then they couldn’t stop themselves being creeps!

But I expect they thought that they were totes treating her like an equal – treating her as crappily as they would anyone who is not there to benefit them!

davidknewton
davidknewton
9 years ago

Just imagine being Paul Elam for a moment. Now stop. Wow, that was terrible. Let’s never do that again.

lkeke35
lkeke35
9 years ago

So, it’s not Braverman’s article. All she did was show up and look around and they’re vilifying her in the comments, rather than the Journalist, who actually wrote the article.

How many of you wanna place gets that they’d have badmouthed her, no matter what she was wearing? A spacesuit, a burka, a circus tent? It doesn’t matter. The point is that she’s a feeemale, I guess.

ParadoxicalIntention
9 years ago

I am a good witch and I took a vow of no curses. I am a good witch and I took a vow of no curses. I am a good witch and I took a vow of no curses.

*deep breath in* … *long exhale*

Yes, how dare a beautiful woman exist in your fucking presence and want to have a conversation with you about your beliefs because she was genuinely curious. How dare she have moving legs and blood in her face and shorts on in the summer.

You know, if AVfM thinks that they’re going to somehow spread their word across the land, maybe they need to stop being so hostile to other people first. I mean, no one will listen to you if you’re so goshdarned mean to people who are just asking questions! No one will listen to you if you’re rude either! You must be polite and considerate at all times and answer all of my questions when I ask them, because how else am I going to learn what you suffer through on a daily basis?! Google?! Pshaw.

fruitloopsie
fruitloopsie
9 years ago

MRAs (aka Misognists Rapey A-Holes)
http://youtu.be/tLPZmPaHme0

frances
frances
9 years ago

Creepy! Stuff like this is going to make their seminar about how rape culture doesn’t exist a lot harder to defend.

PussyPowerTantrum
PussyPowerTantrum
9 years ago

@fruitloopsie Ahaha love the video. Also love how they included a woman creeping on men and called out the rampant objectification and fetishization of black men.

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