So over on Roosh Valizadeh’s terrible, horrible, no good, very bad Return of Kings blog a gentleman named Blair Naso has penned a weird paean to Barbie (the doll, not the Nazi war criminal), suggesting that she is a perfect “inspiration” for girls today.
I suppose it isn’t all that shocking that the kind of men who frequent Return of Kings would be fond of an imaginary woman who doesn’t talk and can’t defend herself.
Naso starts off his post by ridiculing feminists for criticizing Barbie. In his mind, they’re just jealous:
For feminists, what bothers them is that Barbie is beautiful. Feminism is an ugly ideology that overtly seeks to glorify both inner and outer ugliness. …To them, Barbie represents a vile standard of beauty.
In Naso’s mind, Barbie is both a Nietzschean Übermensch (no, really) and the embodiment of a Greek goddess.
Barbie is an over-man to little girls. She transcends reality and inspires admiration. Like Theseus for the ancients and Batman for today’s boys, Barbie goes beyond what a normal person can do. Barbie is not a standard; she is an ideal. She inspires aspiration, not imitation. Barbie is the modern Aphrodite.
Here’s a famous statue of Aphrodite from back in the day. Despite being, you know, a literal goddess, her proportions are a bit more human than Barbie’s.
Naso really seems to have a thing for Barbie:
If characters like Indiana Jones are the apex of masculinity, then Barbie is the same for femininity. She is beautiful, intelligent, domestic, social, gorgeous, hard-working, wealthy, attractive, outgoing, healthy, confident, pretty, talented, lovely, has great tits and hair, accomplished, alluring, charming, elegant, unblemished, graceful, and committed to only one man.
Apparently Naso, like Barbie herself, hasn’t caught on to the blindingly obvious fact that Ken is gay. Also, what about Allan, Brad, Curtis, Todd, Steven, Darren, Derek, Kurt and Ryan? Everyone knows that Barbie is riding the smooth flat crotch area carousel.
As Naso sees it, it’s men, not women, who are the real victims of our “fascist beauty standards.”
Men have to grow muscle, which is a journey that is painful, expensive, and filled with misinformation. And if he’s under six feet tall, his chances with women are drastically cut no matter what his other characteristics.
Women on the other hand have to buy an exercise video and keep their hair long. I suppose make-up can be time-consuming, but fashion is not nearly as expensive as women like to claim.
And if some women develop eating disorders trying to live up to the beauty ideal, well, they have no one but their own inferior female selves to blame.
It would be both mentally and physically unhealthy for a man to obsess about achieving the impossible body of Beowulf. So if Barbie and Aphrodite inspire women to turn to unhealthy practices (like eating disorders or fad diets) in a way that He-man doesn’t to men, then what does that say about women?
Either it is a lie that strict beauty standards cause women to obsess at the risk of their own health, or it is manifest that women are mentally and emotionally inferior to men.
Anyone who really wants to be a hottie needs to work for it.
Both anorexia and fat pride are shortcut cheats to beauty. Mature adults achieve what they want through hard work.
Naso does acknowledge that beauty standards are more “stringent” today. In a spectacularly ludicrous leap of logic — the intellectual equivalent of Evel Knievel’s famously failed jump over the Snake River canyon — he blames this on … ugly women.
My guess why beauty standards are a little more demanding today than they were 100 years ago is because today women are ugly. They are overweight, they have bad hair, they lack social grace, and they think hideous products are fashionable by sole virtue of their popularity. Women and little girls know this instinctually and over-correct through their fantasies.
Perhaps little girls love Barbie and Ariel so much because they see how frumpy mommy and their teachers at school are.
And it is the evil feminists who are keeping these little girls from living out their over-corrected fantasies dreams.
Women just want to be beautiful and have a beautiful life. Barbie gives them the inspiration to achieve their dreams. Then feminism sweeps along and tells them to remain stagnant.
In case anyone here needs inspiration, this song should help.
You could get her a Lammily.
@Fronlcby
Get your niece one of the Dolls of the World Barbies http://www.barbiecollector.com/showcase/category/dolls-world. Still problematic, but at least they have diversity and can help a little girl learn about other cultures.
XD I always wanted one, even the Mexican charro Barbie looked cool to me, and usually I don’t like charros 😛 At least she didn’t have a sarape, a donkey and some cacti.
>_> In fact, I keep hoping Barbie will get out a Tuareg Barbie so I can buy it and finally understand how the dresses work…
…Wow. Check out Japanese Ken.
http://www.barbiecollector.com/files/imagecache/product_detail_main/products/main/V5005_0.png
Doesn’t it logically flow that if little girls are looking up to being Barbie, then they’re looking for potential mates to be Ken? Does that not worry the PUAs a little? Ken, perfect smile, perfect hair, perfect body, always in Barbie’s shadow, helping her silently and endlessly, not a hint of sexual tension.
Not to mention, steampunked, Ken wipes his behind and plucks his nose hairs. How can the PUA’s keep up with that?
Ken implicitly* wipes his behind and plucks his nose hair. They’ve never really addressed that. He seems well groomed, that’s all.
@katz
I see your samurai!Ken and raise you a sultan!Ken http://www.barbiecollector.com/shop/doll/tales-arabian-nights-giftset-50827
There’s also a Morgan and Merlin gift set which I hunger for like WOAH!
Trust MRA types to grab Barbie and focus on her boringest characteristics. There have plenty of good arguments in her favor here. Not to deny the criticisms that make lots of sense, about body and gender roles, but there’s plenty to salvage I think.
@paradoxicalintent–
Yeah, women’s clothes are feh. My major frustrations with plus size clothes are that they are almost always made of horrible fabric (rayon! rayon for days!) and they assume plus size women have no shape–everything is cut wide and round, like a tube. Oh, and the designers seem to assume that all plus sized women have short arms and legs. If I get an XL in standard sizes, I can leave the long sleeves down on a button front shirt. Not so on plus size 1X–the sleeves always hit an inch or so above my wrists.
Re: JudgyBtch–
Is it just me, or does anyone else read everything she writes in Professor Umbridge’s voice?
@katz – ah, Lammily. Besides the unfortunate name, she’s got her own issues: http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/6188746
@ire – those world Barbies are SO. COOL. But they are still the same stereotypical male fantasy body, just with different hair/eye/skin colours.
@Fnolcby
:O Maybe a subscription to a magazine like Cricket would be better, if the World Dolls don’t convince you. Still fun and informative and your niece will keep receiving her gift long after you bought it.
One of my mom’s friends gave me her kids’ old issues and they were tons of fun. I still have them to this day.
What the hell is it with these guys and women with long hair, anyway?
@WatermelonSugar – It isn’t just you, ahaha, but I did think it was just me!
JB accused David of supporting child porn? This from the woman who called sexual abuse victims “whores?”
My favorite Barbie growing up was a Japanese Barbie. She had a red kimono with a yellow obi. I gave her a stylish bob. I guess that’s probably misandry, preferring a Barbie who doesn’t have long blonde hair!
“My guess why beauty standards are a little more demanding today than they were 100 years ago is because today women are ugly. They are overweight, they have bad hair, they lack social grace, and they think hideous products are fashionable by sole virtue of their popularity.”
Yup, every woman in the past was gorgeous with a perfect 36-24-36 figure. Never mind the smallpox, syphilis, tooth decay, fleas, lice, and body odor. Or what having six children will do to any woman’s waist line.
weirwoodtreehugger | February 19, 2015 at 6:55 pm
Of course, she’s referring to that article from 1994, and of course, it’s totally okay for them to dredge something like that up and try to say David hasn’t changed a bit from who he used to be and he still believes every word of something he wrote over a decade ago! [/sarcasm]
The whole thing reeks of circle-jerking and “You’re doing it too!!!!”
And of course, she even denied that Elliot Rodger was an MRA. He may not have been a card-carrying member of the club, but he held your ideals, JB. He was an MRA through and through, even if he wasn’t one by name according to you.
Pretty sure that David can use this to legit sue AVfM, or at the very least JB. This is libel, after all.
Yeah, I’ve seen that article, but I didn’t find it very convincing — it just says “Lammily doesn’t go far enough, so it’s a complete failure,” which isn’t very good logic. There are a lot of factors she doesn’t take into account, and generally I get the sense that she would reject anything that wasn’t her personal dream doll.
My personal favorite Barbie is the “The Birds” Barbie based on Tippi Hedren in the Alfred Hitchcock movie.
Have you all heard of Queens of Africa? They’re outselling Queen B in Nigeria: http://www.npr.org/blogs/codeswitch/2015/01/20/376967233/barbie-has-some-royal-competition-in-nigeria
On the topic of multiculturalism, happy Chinese New Year, everyone! <3
Not to mention the corsetry that caused fainting fits and organ displacement, and probably resulted in more than a few charming, fashionable ladies snuffing it before their time, and medical doctors — mostly male! — calling for radical dress reform to halt this life-destroying madness. Also, eating disorders and diet fads were definitely a thing, 100 years ago; read Louise Foxcroft’s book, Calories and Corsets, to see just how much of a thing they were. Surprise, the Edwardian era had fat ladies too, and ones who struggled just as much as today’s yo-yo dieters!
And if they think 1950s housewives had an easier time of it, I can assure them that such was NOT the case. Girdles, anyone? They were the “modern” cousin of the old killer corset. And diet pills, loaded with addictive amphetamines, were also a popular prescription for bored housewives who had to watch their figures so Hubby Dear didn’t stray. So were sleeping pills, because after a day on Dexedrine, you had to come down somehow. And since the saying went that you could never be too thin, anorexia was a rare diagnosis, even though the problem most certainly existed, and killed women on a regular basis.
And in all eras, there were women who literally killed themselves to look “good”, whatever the “good” look of the day might be.
But women of today are SO UGLY, amirite boyzzzzz?
My parents (mid 90s) didn’t want to get me a Barbie, but we were returning something and mom said she’d get me a replacement toy… well.
Mostly I just like undressing and redressing them. My sister stripped them naked and played with them in the tub, and one developed mold.
I also had a mess of stuffed animals and a chest of play clothes that got more love.
On the related topic of princesses… if there is one thing that Frozen has proven to me is that the obsession with princesses among girls (and women… I own it on Blu-ray, I can’t talk here) is not about the prince, otherwise Elsa wouldn’t be getting the love she does. You can criticize the anti-democratic and pro-consumerism aspects, but, you know, that is only human. It isn’t like little boy’s fantasies aren’t filled with very expensive stuff either.
I have long, dead straight hair. The only way I am able to grow it long without hideous damage is by wearing it in a braid most of the time–when it gets really long, I sleep with it in a braid.
So long hair = pretty, but high maintenance, and I can’t do the down-the-back most of the time without seriously damaging it. Even a ponytail leaves more tangles to comb out the next morning.
In order to look like Barbie, I’d have to surgically lengthen my legs (I have a long torso and short legs), always stand on my tippy-toes after they’ve been fused together, remove my nipples, have my liver and intestines moved somewhere (probably up to the boob area), and get intradermal silicon injections to make a lace-shaped pattern of bumps on my skin over the groin and buttocks. I’d also have to become white.
@WWTH: I had a Japanese Barbie too, but with a different colored kimono. I found it odd that even on that one, the feet were stuck in the tippy-toe position for high heels.
I remember as a little girl getting kind of happy when I saw a commercial for a Skipper doll that wore sneakers and whose feet could go flat against the ground. It’s this commercial, except in English.
19th century fad diets could be even more terrifying than today’s.
http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s–VB9OOZY9–/c_fit,fl_progressive,q_80,w_636/18s0b4arlb0xsjpg.jpg
I never understood dolls.
I mean..never.
By the time I was 3 my parents had warned relatives not to give me dolls, cos I ignored them.