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#gamergate a voice for men antifeminism evil fat fatties gross incompetence gullibility imaginary backwards land irony alert kitties lying liars misogyny MRA none dare call it conspiracy paul elam

Unable to accept that my site's been getting more traffic than his, AVFM's Paul Elam takes a swim in denial

This cat: Not impressed by Paul Elam's obvious bullshit
This cat: Not impressed by Paul Elam’s obvious bullshit

The first stage of grief, Elisabeth Kübler-Ross famously postulated, is denial.

So it’s hardly surprising that Paul Elam and his gang of flunkies and fans at A Voice for Men have responded to the news that my site is besting AVFM in traffic by trying to claim that my traffic is somehow … fake.

Elam’s “evidence” for this assertion? He poked around my site for a few minutes and couldn’t find any posts that felt really “viral” to him.

He explained his, er, logic in a post yesterday. (You’ll have to excuse his terrible prose; he’s apparently running out of ways to call me fat.)

The gynecomastia plagued mammoth hunter’s sudden, meteoric rise into alleged relevance can only be explained by one thing. There must have been a stratospherically viral article (usually meaning more than two paragraphs) penned by the Wizard of Wallow that must have been picked up by every major media outlet in the mainstream.

Trouble is, we could not find it. A complete search of his website for something that coincided with his liftoff into the upper echelons of Alexa rankings, only turned up more of his usual fare. Quote mining, distortions, lies, poorly written snark and hundreds of comments, most of which have nothing to do with the OP and everything to do with kittens.

I’m not sure how one is supposed to be able to tell how much traffic a post has generated just by looking at it; it’s a bit like trying to tell how fast a car can go by looking at it parked.

But using some methodology of his own, apparently based not so much on what is true as on what he desperately wants to be true, he concludes that I bought the traffic using some of that sweet sweet cash I apparently get from the Femilluminati overladies.

So, that leaves us with only one other conclusion about David’s strut-worthy presence on Alexa. He paid for it. Yes, for those who cannot create real traffic, it can be purchased. Of course, purchasing a fake Alexa ranking is, well, fake. But what better tool for web presence could there ever be for a fake writer, with fake ideas waging a fake war against fake enemies for the approval of fake allies?

Also, I’m a big fan of fried chicken. (How did he know?)

A fake Alexa ranking fits on David Futrelle like a day old bucket of fried chicken fits in his lap . And it will probably last about as long given it requires regular financial maintenance.

Elam’s preoccupation with Alexa is a little weird. I didn’t even mention Alexa in my post comparing my traffic to his. Alexa’s numbers for my site and his are based on estimates — extimates that I’m pretty sure are something less-than-reliable, at least when it comes to my site.

No, the reason I know that I’m getting more traffic than A Voice for Men – or at least that I was getting more when I wrote my post on the subject – has nothing to do with Alexa rankings. It’s because Elam posted a screenshot of his actual traffic stats. Which I was able to compare to the traffic stats I get directly from WordPress. (You can see my screenshot and his in my post om the subject.)

The closest thing to “evidence” Elam has to back up his false accusation that my traffic is “fake” is based on something called Google PageRank, a zero-to-ten ranking that provides at least a rough representation of a site’s importance in the internet world. (Zero is totally obscure; ten means you’re as popular as Google.) Unfortunately, Elam’s internet research skills leave something to be desired, and his “evidence” isn’t actually evidence of anything real.

Elam reports that when he typed his site’s url into a site that tracks PageRank it got a rating of 5. He typed WeHuntedTheMammoth.com into the same page and it gets a PageRank of … zero.

Which would be pretty damning, except that it’s meaningless.

You see, the real URL for this blog is manboobz.wordpress.com; that’s the URL that WeHuntedTheMammoth.com redirects you to. And if you type manboobz.wordpress.com into that same PageRank site that Elam used, you’ll see that my site has a Google PageRank of … 4, pretty close to that of AVFM.

Seriously, Paul, try it yourself if you don’t believe me.

So, no, Paul, I didn’t buy traffic or whatever it is you think I did to get “fake” traffic for my “fake” writing.

You want to know the real secret behind the increased traffic to my site? Well. I don’t know if you realized it, Paul, but last year was kind of a breakout year for online misogyny. You remember that whole GamerGate thing? I wrote a lot about that, including a number of posts that collected together a lot of information that other people found useful.

If you look at my most-read posts from the past year – here, here and here – you can see that a lot of people did in fact find them useful: each one was shared on Twitter and Facebook literally thousands of times, as you can see by scrolling down to the bottom of each post. (Or did I fake those too?)

Also, I started writing more than one post a day. All else being equal, more posts means more traffic.

The flipside is that all this misogyny and all this writing kind of burned me out, and I’ve been taking a bit of a breather for the last few weeks, writing fewer posts and taking some days off. So my traffic has slowed a bit. Heck, my traffic may have dropped back down to AVFM levels.

But I’m not worried, Paul. As long as terrible and ridiculous people like you keep saying and doing terrible, ridiculous things, I’m not going to run out of things to write about. And as long as people are interested in hearing about people like you, it seems likely that I’ll continue to get enough traffic to reduce you to tooth-grinding rage.

I can only hope you’re able to work y0ur way through the other stages of grief until you finally reach acceptance. Because right now your desperation is so obvious it can probably be seen from space. It’s not a good look for you.

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grumpyoldnurse
grumpyoldnurse
9 years ago

She’s very beautiful, cupisnique. Thank-you so much for sharing her picture.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
9 years ago

It takes a while to heal. I found that getting another cat actually helped for me, but everyone is different, and you’ll know when you’re ready.

pallygirl
pallygirl
9 years ago

Be especially kind to yourself while you’re grieving. No “I should” thoughts!

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
9 years ago

I signed up just to say that is one heck of a grumpy cat.

Sorry I don’t have anything of any more value to add. Only came across this site recently and everyone is making all the necessary comments far more articulately than me. You’re doing a great job.

That is a grumpy cat though.

proxieme
proxieme
9 years ago

Cupisnique – Don’t feel bad about taking the time you need. My husband (the blurry fellow a page back) took years after the cat that he’d nursed back after she’d been found as a stray with staples in her tail passed.

Then little Motley (now chubby Mott-Mott), the kitten in the pic, ingratiated herself to him 😀

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
9 years ago

What kind of asshole puts staples in a cat’s tail? Ugh, some people.

cupisnique
9 years ago

Yeah, she was my first pet (not including family pets), and I rescued her myself off of the street all the way from Peru. She was a tiny kitten abandoned and forlorn. For 6 weeks I dealt with figuring out all the bureaucracy to get her back to Canada with me. Which actually wasn’t very difficult it turns out, just a pain to figure out exactly what you need. I work at home every day reading and writing for my PhD exams so I spent 6 months with her every day. We were inseparable. I’ve never had an animal depend on me so much, I would have done anything for her. I’m just glad she had a happy life even if it was short, she deserved so much and more.

kittehserf - MOD
kittehserf - MOD
9 years ago

Cupisnique, I am so, so sorry! All the hugs, if you want them.

N’thing what everyone else said: take as long as you need, you’ll know when you’re ready to have another kitty. She’s beautiful, I’m so sorry she’s gone. More hugs.

M. – well sucks to those people attacking you for your spiders. Losers. I’m sorry to be wrong about that. Should have known that assholes will pick on anything at all.

kittehserf - MOD
kittehserf - MOD
9 years ago

She was still only a baby, Cupisnique?

Damn, damnation.

ktrantingredhead
9 years ago

Typical men’s rights mindset. Someone else has what I want. I can’t get what I want. It is someone else’s fault. It is not my fault that I’m pathetic excuse of a shit bag. I deserve to have everything I want and no one else does. If someone else has something I want it’s because they stole it or made it up or lied about it.

alaisvex
alaisvex
9 years ago

Cupisnique, so, so sorry. That poor, beautiful kitten.

cupisnique
9 years ago

Yeah, it was the worst day ever. I took her to get spayed and her heart stopped after they finished the operation. According to the vet she had an abnormal heart and would not have lived very long. There was nothing that they could have done to fix it even if we had known about it.

My friend James has agreed to scour the streets where we found her the next time we are in Peru together in search of her potential relatives 🙂

kittehserf - MOD
kittehserf - MOD
9 years ago

Oh gods, what a horrible shock!

Miss Andry
9 years ago

Aww, cupisnique 🙁

*hug*

wordsp1nner
wordsp1nner
9 years ago

Cupisnique–that is so terrible! I’m so sorry for your loss, but I’m glad you were able to give her a good life for the time she had.

Tracy
Tracy
9 years ago

@Cupisnique I’m so sorry! We lost one of ours not long ago and it really does hurt. Sounds like she had a lovely life with you, and that you in turn were lucky to have been with her. We find the cats we need, I think (or they find/pick us)

@dudeinthewoods I want your life. Berkshires!

@Paulie, since you’re likely reading – wow, sour grapes. Super-puckery sour grapes. Maybe stop trying to be popular and start trying to be… I dunno… helpful to men?

http://i.imgur.com/M45o9.jpg

Tracy
Tracy
9 years ago

Also: @David, thanks so much for all you do! Hope you’re having a restful break.

And @Miss Andry, I’m really enjoying your blog! It’s good stuff 🙂

grumpyoldnurse
grumpyoldnurse
9 years ago

I approve of Cat of Disapproval!

kittehserf - MOD
kittehserf - MOD
9 years ago

I just peeked at your blog, Miss Andry – love that Separated at Birth pic of Roosh the Douche. 😀

grumpyoldnurse
grumpyoldnurse
9 years ago

I don’t know, kitteh, that seems pretty insultng to the caveman…
(I can’t resist teh low hanging fruit)

weirwoodtreehugger
9 years ago

It’s so sad when kitties die young. My dad and brother had a cat that passed away at only about a year old. He had a UTI that just kept coming back and finally his bladder burst. Even though I never lived with Charlie it made me sadder than the deaths of Clio and Bijou two
of the family cats I grew up with because both those girls lived long lives. Nothing was more devastating than when Whiskers died though. He was my special kitty. I got him as my 7th birthday present and he was with me until I was 24.

I’m so sorry for your loss Cupsinique. Same to anyone else who has lost a pet recently. No matter what anyone says, they’re family members too.

Miss Andry
9 years ago

@Tracy and kittehserf

Thanks! I appreciate it! 🙂

gillyrosebee
gillyrosebee
9 years ago

Oh, cupisnique, my condolences on your loss. She was a beautiful baby and she looked so happy in your arms. You did the very best thing for a little stray cat, you gave her a home and filled her life with love.

kittehserf - MOD
kittehserf - MOD
9 years ago

I don’t know, kitteh, that seems pretty insultng to the caveman…
(I can’t resist teh low hanging fruit)

True, true … I think I owe that caveman an apology!

Miss Andry, ya welcome!

cupisnique
9 years ago

I wonder if I can show you guys this video of her. It’s probably the cutest thing ever.

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