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Are men oppressed by women who put their hair up in buns?

Heartiste's worst nightmare?
Heartiste’s worst nightmare?

Pity the poor pickup artists, who have suffered so much at the hands of modern women.

Just consider the many cruelties that these malicious females have inflicted on these long-suffering men: Women insult and horrify men by getting tattoos, developing self-esteem, and being fat. They have the temerity to sleep with men that aren’t pickup artists. They force would-be Casanovas to take showers and even wipe their own asses in order to appeal to their fickle female tastes. Sometimes they even say “no” to sex.

And then there is the hair thing: believe it or not, some women actually cut their hair short in an obvious attempt to destroy the boners of modern man.

But it turns out women don’t have to get pixie cuts to oppress men with their hair. They can also put their long hair … in a bun.

Our old friend Heartiste is on the case:

Here, by the way, is the example he give of one of these manjawed, bun-headed you-know-whats:

hairbun

One of Heartiste’s fans suggests that the real problem isn’t the bun but her excessively Jewish glasses:

Just a reminder: the dudes having this, er, conversation seriously think of themselves as the Great White Hope for western civilization.

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kittehserf - MOD
9 years ago

Magpie – a pork pie hat’s similar in size to a trilby, but it’s flat across the top. Goes back earlier, too, it’s early 19th century.

contrapangloss – or they played Foyle and Milner

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2013/03/23/article-2298004-18E0F052000005DC-542_634x496.jpg

or Thursday! 🙂

http://assets.whatsontv.co.uk/whatsontv/live/styles/large/s3/media/ENDEAVOURll_EPISODE1_01.JPG

(Roger Allam was quite shattered when his hat got wrecked while filming series 2 of Endeavour. He said the new one they got him was too spiffy for Fred Thursday.)

closetpuritan
9 years ago

Yay, misandering success! I rarely leave the house without putting my hair in a bun.

lith
lith
9 years ago

Louise:

Well, most men do find long hair on women more attractive than short hair. i have yet to see a woman whose appearance is actually improved by cutting her hair. tattoos are hideous on women and on men as well.

I’ve actually commented on a number of occasions – when a woman has gone from long to short hair – that it suits them. And it’s generally someone on television so it’s not just being polite.
I think honestly it’s just a conditioning thing – people think that women are supposed to have long hair so they can’t handle a woman having short hair, it just doesn’t fit the ‘woman’ box. It’s okay, they’ll get it eventually as it and other dreadful lapses in decorum become more common. I expect there’ll be a chorus of increasingly loud but thankfully fewer voices dissenting but I don’t think most people are truly bothered by such things, more puzzled, and that’s easy enough to get over given time and exposure.

Newt
Newt
9 years ago

Clearly, I can misander in my sleep.

– Dougal, you know you can oppress a man with sleep?

– Can you, Ted?

– Yes. It’s a way of reminding him he had a tiring day.

– God, there’s lots of ways you can oppress men, isn’t there, Ted?

lith
lith
9 years ago

At a guess, most straight guys, looking at that photo, would not be thinking “hm, manjawed lawyer bun, intellectual glasses, NOPE”.

I believe there are a large number of people that actually like the librarian/bookish look which those glasses convey.
Yep, google image search for “sexy librarian” definitely suggests that’s a thing.
Personally I think the glasses suit her and these guys may be slightly over-reacting to some glasses. And a hair-style. Even if they really don’t like them. So yes, I agree, they are making excuses for why they aren’t getting laid, either that or they’ve gone so far on the ‘What makes a woman a 10’ train they really can’t see a woman without rating them on some mental checklist.

Quick question – “Peak Manjawed Lawyercunt” – errr, what’s this? Should I know? I… what?

Are they saying she has a man’s jaw? I looked really closely and I’m sure it’s just her own. If it’s to do with the hairstyle then I’m lost.

Plaatsvervangende Schaamte

@lith,

I think he’s saying we’re currently seeing the highest amount of strong-willed women working in the field of law with face shapes that don’t appeal to his broner, and this is unacceptable.

So yeah, four maximum-strength doses of misogyny in three profoundly stupid words.

Miss Diketon
Miss Diketon
9 years ago

@Newt: OMG. I totally read that in Father Ted and Father Dougal’s voices. Well done indeed.

I’m oppressed by the fact that all men don’t sound like Alan Rickman when they speak. Someone needs to do something about that soon.

lith
lith
9 years ago

@Miss Diketon:

I’m oppressed by the fact that all men don’t sound like Alan Rickman when they speak. Someone needs to do something about that soon.

Hahahaha 🙂

@Plaatsvervangende Schaamte:

I think he’s saying we’re currently seeing the highest amount of strong-willed women working in the field of law with face shapes that don’t appeal to his broner, and this is unacceptable.

So yeah, four maximum-strength doses of misogyny in three profoundly stupid words.

Condensed misogyny, in a can. It doesn’t even…
Just… oh why am I trying to make sense of it, of course it’s ridiculous, pointless and bizarre. I just feel like… like there should be some point I suppose. Oh no, women are working, how sad for you – also they have DNA from their parents making them look vaguely similar, again, how very sad for you.
He must be very lonely.

Newt
Newt
9 years ago

I totally read that in Father Ted and Father Dougal’s voices. Well done indeed.

I can’t take credit for that – I barely changed the actual dialogue from the episode.

weirwoodtreehugger
9 years ago

The nobody likes short hair thing is so silly. Twiggy got big after getting a pixie cut. Linda Evangelista had short hair for the entirety of her supermodel career. The industry that sets beauty standards and fashion has deemed short hair attractive many times.

Falconer
9 years ago
Bina
Bina
9 years ago

Yes, that’s a fedora. They’re supposed to have wider brims.

Buttercup Q. Skullpants

Quick question – “Peak Manjawed Lawyercunt” – errr, what’s this? Should I know? I… what?

Well, you see, women having jaws is unnatural, because they’re not supposed to talk. Or eat.

Heartiste really does freak out when the peas accidentally touch the mashed potatoes, doesn’t he? “This woman has a thing that’s on my private list of Segregated Male-Only Traits! Euwww yucky!”

Emmy Rae
Emmy Rae
9 years ago

Nice of you all to chime in with your preferences regarding men and their appearance but what if they get confused about whose standards to meet?

lith
lith
9 years ago

Buttercup:

Because I laughed, I then had to explain that (and the background to it) to my 7yr old son (apart from the 7yr-old-inappropriate bits) – he tells me there’s no such thing as a man’s jaw or a woman’s jaw, it’s just a jaw.
Also I’ve been meaning to watch Toys for ages and the peas thing is just another reminder that I must show it to the kids.

I know how to describe my confusion now – it’s like in The IT crowd when Richmond goes into a flashback and starts talking to the camera, and everyone in the room is trying to work out what he’s looking at. When I read the crap they write I feel like that:

sunnysombrera
sunnysombrera
9 years ago

Achtung manner!*

Since you feel that women should have zero hair down below, I think it’s appropriate to regulate your facial hair. Don’t get me wrong, sometimes the smooth look just doesn’t suit some men and that’s fine with me. However your beards must be no longer than 1.5 centimetres, five day stubble is the ideal. Hop to it chaps! Buy a trimmer immediately!

And under no circumstances must you have a neckbeard or bum fluff. It’s against nature itself. And Paul Elam, please get rid of that monstrosity around your mouth and chin. It makes you look like you have vagina envy but I’m pretty sure you actually do.

Love, your friendly neighbourhood feminazi.

(my phone won’t let me do the dots above the a, sorry for butchering such a great language).

contrapangloss
9 years ago

Awake and at work, now. Falconer and Kittehs have found four acceptable exceptions to the “Dead before 2000 or Indiana Jones” rule of Fedora pulling off.

Honestly, I think it’s the old style suits that makes it work for them, though. Except the doctor, because the fourth doctor could probably pull off a giant pink sombrero and I’d still think he was wonderful.

Because… Key to Time.

Bina
Bina
9 years ago

And under no circumstances must you have a neckbeard or bum fluff. It’s against nature itself. And Paul Elam, please get rid of that monstrosity around your mouth and chin. It makes you look like you have vagina envy but I’m pretty sure you actually do.

>chanting<

Paulie's a mangina! Paulie's a mangina! Nanny nanny boo boo!

ParadoxicalIntention
ParadoxicalIntention
9 years ago

Emmy Rae

Nice of you all to chime in with your preferences regarding men and their appearance but what if they get confused about whose standards to meet?

They’re supposed to meet all of them all at once, silly! If they don’t, then they are simply unbangable (due to them not being perfect tens, obvs), and are met with instant scorn, complete with mockery!

How DARE a man not meet all our standards for masculine sexiness?! We’re not asking that much! Only complete perfection and compliance with contradicting standards!

(I can’t believe I’ve pulled off this much sarcasm right after waking up, holy shit.)

Myriad
Myriad
9 years ago

Ha ha ha! Paridoxicalintension beat me to it. My hat is off to you.

hambeast (formerly twincats)
hambeast (formerly twincats)
9 years ago

I don’t have any myself, but that’s mainly because I haven’t been able to think of anything breathtakingly lovely and original that I cared so much about that I’d want to have it permanently inked into my skin.

This is where I am. Maybe a coffee cup with “Death before Decaf” below it?

There is nothing inherently “good” or “bad” about chocolate chip cookies, it’s just differences in personal taste.

I’m with you here, pallygirl. I’ve always thought that the chocolate chips got in the way of a nice cookie so one time I baked the recipe from the chip bag w/o the chips. That wasn’t quite right, either; it was missing something. So I’ve given up on chocolate chip cookies.

sunnysombrera
sunnysombrera
9 years ago

I’ve never understood jelly bean cookies. Why, just…why?

Buttercup Q. Skullpants

I like chocolate chip cookies, but am not fond of chocolate chip ice cream. It’s a texture thing. The hard rock-like chips interrupt the creamy nirvana.

It’s like listening to “Adagio for Strings” with someone honking a clown horn in your ear every few seconds.

skiriki
9 years ago

@grumpyoldnurse:

Oh, wait! I forgot (silly me) as a woman over 40, I’m invisible to them.

F***. Soon. SOON I will have my own invisibility cloak.

Just to check — is 40 enough, or do I have to be 41?

kittehserf
9 years ago

hambeast –

Maybe a coffee cup with “Death before Decaf” below it?

Don’t do that! You’ll have to explain it endlessly if you end up having to drink decaf or not have coffee at all (may you be forever free of the curse of acid reflux).

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