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Are men oppressed by women who put their hair up in buns?

Heartiste's worst nightmare?
Heartiste’s worst nightmare?

Pity the poor pickup artists, who have suffered so much at the hands of modern women.

Just consider the many cruelties that these malicious females have inflicted on these long-suffering men: Women insult and horrify men by getting tattoos, developing self-esteem, and being fat. They have the temerity to sleep with men that aren’t pickup artists. They force would-be Casanovas to take showers and even wipe their own asses in order to appeal to their fickle female tastes. Sometimes they even say “no” to sex.

And then there is the hair thing: believe it or not, some women actually cut their hair short in an obvious attempt to destroy the boners of modern man.

But it turns out women don’t have to get pixie cuts to oppress men with their hair. They can also put their long hair … in a bun.

Our old friend Heartiste is on the case:

Here, by the way, is the example he give of one of these manjawed, bun-headed you-know-whats:

hairbun

One of Heartiste’s fans suggests that the real problem isn’t the bun but her excessively Jewish glasses:

Just a reminder: the dudes having this, er, conversation seriously think of themselves as the Great White Hope for western civilization.

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ceebarks
ceebarks
9 years ago

Yeah, I think the “bun” trend has been over for a couple years now. People still wear them, but I’d say we passed Peak Bun in maybe about 2011ish. Doesn’t heartiste claim to live in a big city and spend a lot of time with 20somethings?!

How are these guys always so amazingly behind the times? lol

I remember Athol Kay railing about how ugly and outdated bangs are: women should grow them out posthaste, he didn’t want to hear excuses about “face shape” or whatever other irrelevant bluepill blathering the ladies might think up to counter him.

Anyway, I knew right then it was definitely time to cut them back in, b/c Athol is exactly the kind of guy who pronounces things “out” the minute they’re back in fashion. 😀

Bina
Bina
9 years ago

At a guess, most straight guys, looking at that photo, would not be thinking “hm, manjawed lawyer bun, intellectual glasses, NOPE”.

More likely it’s “hello, pretty librarian, please shush me!” Or, to misquote Sir Mix-A-Lot, “My anaconda don’t want none unless you wear a BUN, hon!”

Also, I put my shoulder-length hair up in a knot before bed, to keep it from getting tangled (ponytail elastic looped three times ’round, with the hair pulled only halfway through on the last loop). Clearly, I can misander in my sleep.

Binjabreel
Binjabreel
9 years ago

It’s bizarre: these guys’ worldview needs attractiveness to at least have a large objective component. Women have to be easily sort-able on a simple linear scale because if there’s disagreement on who’s a 10 and who’s an 8 then the whole system breaks down.

But the entire fucking premise of pickup artistry is that you can put on a particular character that women will find attractive- I.e., that there is a large subjective component that you, as a not-conventionally attractive man, can learn to exploit.

Honestly, these are the schmucks with the rationalization hamsters.

Binjabreel
Binjabreel
9 years ago

Re:ikanreed
Hah! Maybe a braid is Jom crow, since it’s enforced, but a ponytail is like modern de facto segregation.

Binjabreel
Binjabreel
9 years ago

wtf autocorrect?! JOM ISN’T EVEN A WORD!!

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
9 years ago

@Binjabreel

Where you’re going wrong is in thinking that women are people, rather than interchangeable sex-dispensing dolls that operate like a video game. Anyone who takes the time to learn the boss’s attack pattern can defeat it, and if you have the cheat code you don’t even have to do that much.

wtf autocorrect?! JOM ISN’T EVEN A WORD!!

Is it wrong that I laughed?

Puddleglum
9 years ago

I’ve started growing my hair out as, having reached the magical age of 40ish, I am invisible to these guys and can do what I want. Okay, I’m actually growing it out because I’m bored. Not sure if I’ll be able to do buns, though; my hair is very thick and coarse, so after a certain length, buns would be too heavy and large. Hmmm. May have to redo the undercut if I want to do buns…

AltoFronto
AltoFronto
9 years ago

When I saw that photo, the first thing that popped into my head was that she looks like she’s cosplaying the “Living With Chronic Bitchface” cartoon that made the rounds amongst amongst feminists I know a while back.

http://www.hiphipgingin.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/Chronic-Bitchface-by-Krisatomic.png

If so, there would be a kind of poetic justice to it, in that it would add another layer of misandry to the message of “She’s not there to look pretty for you, douchebros.”

freemage
9 years ago

Yeah… That woman in that picture is stunning, the style looks gorgeous on her, and I can’t even…

Ugh.

Wait, no, no, I get it! These guys are stuck in a 1980s teen rom-com! You know, where the unpopular girl has a friend who pulls the girl’s hair out of the ponytail and takes off her glasses and suddenly the ugly duckling is a gorgeous swan?

Criticaldragon1177 | January 8, 2015 at 10:32 am

David Futrelle

Interestingly enough, Princess Leia’s hairstyle isn’t even possible in real life.

Mythbusting Princess Leia’s Hair

http://skepchick.org/2010/07/mythbusting-princess-leias-hair/

I guess women who want to be Princess Leia for Halloween are going to be oppressing men with their fake hair, now.

Okay, that article was enlightening. I am now convinced that the women of the Royal Family of Alderaan have a symbiotic relationship with an alien race that simply resembles human hair, in the same way Ewoks resemble teddy bears.

Vanir (@Vanir85)
9 years ago

Likely the same motivation as GGers whining about women with colored hair. Anger that women simply don’t give a **** about their preferences. Frustration over not being in a position of power where women HAS to indulge their preferences.

Arrogant men who feel entitled to something they are not getting. Like impotent beasts roaring “submit and obey” – with no one caring.

brooked
brooked
9 years ago

I checked out Truth Warrior’s twitter feed because I’m a masochist and not the fun kind. Wow, white supremacists share MRAs’ love of poorly conceived shouty ugly ass memes. The racism is vile enough to be worse overall than nightmarish graphic design but it’s reassuring that shitbag bigots are this talentless.

Also, amid Vdare’s slogans (A racist is someone winning argument with a leftist – Peter Brimelow), a Big Red video clip and much, much worse things, I saw a Brit Hume retweet. Way to keep it real, racially, Brit.

Falconer
9 years ago

Speaking of doing your hair up, this is DC’s new Power Girl:

http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s–zMgkf5hK–/c_fit,fl_progressive,q_80,w_636/xevnmbth9kp3w5nynjiy.jpg

No boob window, but there’s a golden-brown-colored spot where the boob window was on the last model Kara.

Falconer
9 years ago

wtf autocorrect?! JOM ISN’T EVEN A WORD!!

Jom Kork, Captain of the Storshep Entorprase, and his stalwart First Officer Speck.

brooked
brooked
9 years ago

I love love love gators failed attempt to turn their hate on for dyed hair into the anti-SJW version of fedora jokes because it’s so forced, hamfisted and mean spirited. They don’t seem to realize it’s not going to catch due to it’s complete lack of charm and humor. They’re just going to keep railing about dyed hair and wonder why the rest of the internet won’t join in on the no fun.

brooked
brooked
9 years ago

@Falconer

Not to be a cynic, but the big boobs, the window and blond white woman will likely be right back in a few years.

contrapangloss
9 years ago

What I really don’t get is how you can always see superhero’s bellybuttons through the spandex. It doesn’t make sense.

It happens all the time, but I don’t get it!

weirwoodtreehugger
9 years ago

Ceebarks,
These guys are still complaining about Sex and the City which went off the air a decade ago. It’s not a surprise that they’re two years behind on hair trends.

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
9 years ago

Not only a fake boob window, but also fake underboob, what with the color contrast positioned where it is.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
9 years ago

How do manbuns fit into this theory? They became a thing at one point and still haven’t quite gone away. Are the men who wear them oppressing themselves, gay men, or nobody?

Falconer
9 years ago

@brooked: I saw someone arguing that, from a legal standpoint, Marvel and DC can’t kill characters off dead and leave them dead, because that would not be managing their properties for the best benefit of their investors and might open them up to lawsuits. So yeah, Big-Boobed White Woman (Kara Zor-L) is probably going to be back soon, just like they couldn’t leave Captain America dead. All we can do is enjoy Tanya Spears while we have her, I guess, and advocate for new characters of color.

proxieme
proxieme
9 years ago

Have you read the new Ms Marvel?

Luzbelitx
9 years ago

Arrogant men who feel entitled to something they are not getting. Like impotent beasts roaring “submit and obey” – with no one caring.

Then it all crashes down
And you break your crown
And you point your finger but there’s no one around
Just want one thing
Just to play the King
But the castle’s crumbled and you’re left with just a name
Where’s your crown, King Nothing?

Myriad
Myriad
9 years ago

AltoFronto LOL! I can so relate to that cartoon. For better or worse, that’s meh face.

Falconer
9 years ago

@proxieme: No. I admit I don’t read actual comics much these days. I do check news sites like The Mary Sue and io9 pretty regularly, so I sound like I’m up to date.

I do like what I’ve seen of Ms. Marvel.

Miss Andry
9 years ago

@Binjabreel

Jom Crow is the fictional oppression suffered by MRAs and PUAs by women and feminists.