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Pickup artist Roosh V wins Most Unfortunate Metaphor of the Year Award, may not know how babies are made

Oh, you're a model? You mean, like a tentacle model?
Oh, you’re a model? You mean, like a tentacle model?

Pickup guru Roosh Valizadeh is not only a terrible, terrible person. He is also an abuser of language.

In a post entitled Culture War Predictions For 2015, Roosh forecasts great things for the “manosphere” in the coming year. Or perhaps the coming 9 months?

Prepare yourself for the most belabored (heh heh) pregnancy metaphor the world has ever seen:

In 2013, we saw a large increase in manosphere readership that began to ejaculate our ideas onto the mainstream. In 2014, these ideas became the morning sickness that left the enemy unprepared and unwilling to respond with logic, reason, and facts. In 2015, you will see the birthing on our side of semi-formalized alliances between various groups that use more organized action to deal crushing blows upon panicked feminists and SJW’s. Media owners will reconsider their usefulness. At the same time, our mob will grow to a frightening size after growing big and strong on breast milk, and they will be lustful for blood.

Obviously, there is nothing in that paragraph that isn’t awful. But I’m a little hung up on that first sentence. Roosh: I know you probably watch a lot of porn, dude, but you are aware that in order to make a baby, you need to deposit your sperm into a woman, not onto her, like certain kinds of squid.

Actually, I’m a little confused about exactly what happens, with the squid in any case; their sex parties get pretty freaky. But I am pretty sure that to make human babies the sperm needs to get inside the woman somewhere in that whole region down there.

Could it be that Roosh learned everything he knows about reproduction from Men in Black?

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Lea
Lea
9 years ago

More hugs for Shawn- (((Shawn)))

Skye
Skye
9 years ago

Shaun, that’s just awful. I’m so sorry

Grumpyoldnurse, please don’t underestimate your response. You did what you felt able to do, no one can ask more of you

kmcorby
9 years ago

Right, they claim to adopt these supposedly “masculine” traits of logic and reason, but they’re actually the biggest bunch of pants-pissing little crybabies you ever saw in your life. God, they’re all just so pathetic. They don’t even realize this “war” they’re fighting exists only n their pointy little heads.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
9 years ago

I dunno, do we actually believe that they believe the things they claim? I think that on some level they know they’re full of shit, and that’s part of why they’re so petulant and defensive.

thebewilderness
thebewilderness
9 years ago

They lie, and because they lie they thimk everyone lies. It is just a matter of how big the lie they tell themselves.

gillyrosebee
gillyrosebee
9 years ago

Did anyone hear that tl;dr piece where they interviewed Alanah Pearce, who tracked down a bunch of the guys sending her rape and death threats, only to discover that a bunch were adolescent boys? And she promptly told their mothers what they were up to?

cupisnique
9 years ago

@lordpabu

I still totally watch Supernatural even though I am aware of it’s many flaws. I consider it one of my feminist guilty pleasures, although I don’t actually make excuses for it, I just choose to enjoy watching the show despite it’s many failings.

Skye
Skye
9 years ago

Gillyrosebee, I read about that. It was awsome

Skye
Skye
9 years ago

*awesome

/ahem

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