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"My seed has too much dignity to be in the company of the rest of useless humanity" and other insights on marriage and sperm from Infowars.com

Gosh, who would ever have expected that this guy might prove popular with unhinged MRA types?
Gosh, who would ever have thought that this guy might prove to be popular with unhinged MRA types?

So while poking about the manosphere today I followed a link from an obscure Men’s Rights blog over to Alex Jones’ Infowars site — specifically to the comments on a news article about a study that claims internet porn is destroying marriage.

Jones, as you may know, is essentially the king of the world’s conspiracy theorists, so naturally I expected his commenters to be pretty unhinged. What I didn’t realize is that they would also all be Men’s Rights Activists.

Well, maybe they don’t all call themselves that, but they certainly think like MRAs; several even linked to a site for Men Going Their Own Way.

Most commenters agreed that porn was a better deal than a wife; after all, as numerous wits declared, porn won’t steal half your money in a divorce.

But alongside such familiar, indeed cliché, sentiments there were also some pretty inspired mini-rants. Here’s my favorite, which received several dozen upvotes from the regulars, making it one of the most popular comments in the 373-comment thread.

 EinNietzscheStein • 4 days ago  My body, my choice. Been woman free for 3 years now, and at least $60K richer for it. Also realized I can live off under $10K a year, and thus under the tax exemption bracket, meaning I don't need to suffer tax extortion to pay for the indoctrination of breeders kids in collectivization concentration camps called school. I can move to where the jobs are, I can travel the world and if need be, rent woman for just a night. And even if they shut down porn or the internet, they will never ever be able to locate or confiscate years of downloaded material. I will proudly be releasing my sperm down the bathtub drain rather than down any the throat of some duplicitious broad who is a threat to my personal sovereignity, wealth, and sanity. I've had my share of women, and checking out. Thanks for nothing, you empty shells. You are the true polygamists, married to the state, married to your smartphones, married to your burdensome eggs, and good men will only occupy that very tiny space you left for him. My seed has too much dignity to be in the company of the rest of useless humanity that has no dignity or principles of its own.  24 • Reply • Share ›      Avatar     Another Apostle EinNietzscheStein • 4 days ago      Well said Brother!     3     •     Reply     •     Share ›         −     Avatar     chris EinNietzscheStein • 4 days ago      Amen brother. Eloquently stated...

But there were other comments that were nearly as, er, inspired as this one. Take this righteous comment from one of Mr. EinNietzscheStein’s biggest fans:

 Another Apostle • 4 days ago  I thank our Lord and Savior for Comment Sites like this. It has finally allowed men to get there feelings out toward what is going on. I hope this grows into a maninism movement to reclaim our God Given right to lead the family, the workplace and set our women back where they belong. There are some very afraid feminists out there right now realizing that their little ploy is no longer on track; men are not the big dumb clods that they have taken us for. Gentlemen, let's get our dignity back. Anyone who agrees with me, upvote this comment and I will lead the way into a new tomorrow. Quit sitting back and taking it. This is why they have got so far, it's because we never really took them seriously. I wonder how many billions of dollars in male assets the feminist movement has aquired in their war against men in the last forty years or so.  11 • Reply • Share ›And who could forget this fellow’s intriguing theories about female sexuality?

 WEREFEAT010 • 4 days ago  The promotion of feminism and homosexuality, plus the woman's ability to get a divorce for any reason, keep the house and the children adds to the fact that women are weak and will cave in when put under stress. The typical American woman is unsure of her feminism and is looking for another woman with a man's body who will obey her, cook and do housework. Eventually the woman in a man's body becomes optional, and a woman in a woman's body is acceptable.  This is Cultural Communism in action. The goal is to destroy the Family unit.  New movie: "This is Where I Leave You." In the movie, we have gentiles who wish to be Jews, and Jane Fonda AKA "Hanoi Jane" apparently announcing that she is now lesbian. She is "turned" in the movie's plot. I'd call that divine justice.  3 • Reply • Share ›

“Hanoi Jane.” Hadn’t heard that in a long time. Really brings you back, doesn’t it?

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kittehserf - MOD
9 years ago

That’s one of those “sleep with one eye open” things.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
9 years ago

“At some point I will figure out how to wriggle out of this humiliating outfit, human, and then you will pay.”

skiriki
9 years ago

Oh dear, getting a Sphynx is probably not a good idea, considering the latitude where I am, and nature of winters. That poor thing would get very cold. 🙁 Which is also one of those “do Savannah Cats need above-normal room temp or what” questions that pop to my mind. 🙁 Devon Rexes are quite lovely, though.

M. the Social Justice Ranger
M. the Social Justice Ranger
9 years ago

I tried to get a picture of Levi in a Santa hat to post here, but when I turned around to get the camera he shredded it completely. Guess he wasn’t feeling festive.

Devon rexes are amazing cats (I used to be owned by a grey tabby Devon, Nefertiti, but she passed from old age years ago), absolute lovey-dovey snuggle-bugs despite what their grumpy expressions would suggest. The fact that they don’t shed nearly as much as other cats is a nice bonus, but they have very sharp claws even by kitty standards, so be careful there! The scars are my Devon badge of honour. =P

Lea
Lea
9 years ago

Threadrupting to make sure folks know that kitties need organ meat if they get a raw diet.

I raw fed my critters for a while. They were no healthier, it was messy and time consuming. But it made them very happy.

OccupyMedic
OccupyMedic
9 years ago
cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
9 years ago
Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
9 years ago

@Nathan

Some cats can have pretty high-maintenance personalities. Mine has spells where she crawls all over me all the time and isn’t happy at all unless I’m actively petting her. If I leave for the day (to work, say) she won’t leave me alone the entire time I’m home. It makes it really hard to do anything else, even playing video games or reading. A ex-friend of mine has a cat who literally will not eat until she is being petted at the same time. Neither is an only cat.

Neurotic cats like that aren’t common, but they happen. So if this is your first cat and you need a cat who isn’t going to have neuroses, go to adopt an adult cat instead of a kitten. Kittens may not show their weird quirks for a year, but you’ll know quickly if an adult cat has a personality that is incompatible with your needs. Also: adult cats are harder for shelters to adopt out, so it’s a win for everyone.

gillyrosebee
9 years ago

Seconding the ‘adopt an adult cat’ suggestion. Kittens are cute, and lots of people think they want one, but they are like puppies in that they will be more energetic and challenging (in general, obviously individual differences remain) than a cat past their kitten stage. Until my most recent two, I’ve always gotten cats as older rescues, there are always too many older cats looking for homes.

I used to have a rule that I would never adopt kittens, but my two girls chose for me. I wasn’t even there to see them, but Evie crawled into the pocket of my coat and cried piteously when I tried to pull her out, so she came home with me, and since she and her sister were so closely bonded, Adora came too. Wretched little scamps! 😉

Nathan Hevenstone
9 years ago

I hadn’t actually decided whether I want a kitten or adult cat, but it sounds like adopting an adult cat would be better, so I guess I’ll go that route when I do finally do this.

And don’t worry y’all… I will never dress up a pet. I have never understood pet clothes and costumes, and I still don’t. Sure, maybe it’s cute from a human perspective, but that poor cat! That poor dog!

What are the opinions of catnip, here? Cats seem to adore it, but what are the negatives? Besides… you know… everything in moderation…

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
9 years ago

What are the opinions of catnip, here?

I’ve had only one cat who got high from it. That was pretty funny. I’ve had two cats who got interested and would roll in it, but never got a visible high. The others cared nothing for it.

Catnip can be kind of expensive if you don’t grow it yourself, so there’s a negative for you. LOL It’s not like heroin or anything, mainly because the only dealer is you.

If you were to get a sphinx, you would need to teach the cat to wear sweaters and such, so dressing up an animal is not invariably bad.

gillyrosebee
9 years ago

As far as I know there are no negatives to catnip (except that it makes some cats, like mine, really aggressive). I like to put down a pinch or two of dried nip once a week or so before I do the cleaning. The girls roll around in it, eat some of it, chase each other around the house at a running gallop and then collapse, exhausted, in their baskets.

Then I do the vacuuming and we’re all set for another week.

Nathan Hevenstone
9 years ago

I do know that Dad adopted Ace as soon as he was ready to be adopted, because my parents told me that we had to handle all of Ace’s first check-ups and shots. We had to get him spayed and neutered as well. So My brother, Ace, and I kind of grew up together.

My dad did tell me how angry he got when the vet suggested declawing. We used those rubber claw covers, instead, as well as the most humane form of claw-clipping that existed at the time. Lots of brushing was involved, too. Ace had all manner of scratching posts, at different heights. I plan on the covers, as well, plus, obviously, scratching surfaces galore.

I do find kittens adorable, but adult cats are at least as adorable, and I’m not looking to adopt purely because of adorableness.

Nathan Hevenstone
9 years ago

Catnip can be kind of expensive if you don’t grow it yourself, so there’s a negative for you. LOL It’s not like heroin or anything, mainly because the only dealer is you.

I can grow my own catnip? Hm…

If you were to get a sphinx, you would need to teach the cat to wear sweaters and such, so dressing up an animal is not invariably bad.

Oh. Interesting. I hadn’t thought of that. If that were the case, though, I’d look more for the cat’s comfort than anything that makes them look “totes adorbs” (like those Santa costumes above… they’re adorable, yes, but that poor cat and dog look like they want to run into a hiding place and never come out again 🙁 ).

katz
9 years ago

I wasn’t even there to see them, but Evie crawled into the pocket of my coat and cried piteously when I tried to pull her out, so she came home with me, and since she and her sister were so closely bonded, Adora came too.

Bebop crawled into the hood of my sweater!

http://cboye.files.wordpress.com/2014/03/img_8386.jpg

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
9 years ago

You can not only grow your own catnip, you can make a delicious tea (for yourself) out of it.

gillyrosebee
9 years ago

Funny, I’ve never bought catnip – a little packet of it has come with every scratcher I’ve ever bought, and I go through it so slowly that I always seem to have some lying around. I do grow some of my own, as my girls LOVE the fresh stuff (they come running from anywhere in the house when I cut a leaf off of the indoor plant, or bring in a sprig from outside.

And, side note, squirrels seem to get really high on catnip, or at least the squirrels around me seem to love rolling around in it and nibbling on it, and tend to be less coordinated (to the point of actually falling out of trees) after they have been partaking.

Yay for Soft Paws! My last cat was an enthusiastic upholstery destroyer, so I kept her claws covered most of the time. My current two grew up with cardboard scratchers, and so developed the expectation that anything cardboard belonged to them. They’ve never taken much interest in the furniture as a result. Occasionally they will destroy some piece of cardboard that I leave lying around, but I figure that was my fault and not theirs, as I’m the one who broke the deal.

gillyrosebee
9 years ago

Bebop crawled into the hood of my sweater!

*melts into a steaming puddle of AWWWWWW from such intense cute*

And how could you resist those eyes? That boopable nose?

Seriously adorable!

samantha
9 years ago

Au contraire, they are the ones being cruel.

Urm… what I meant was that the folk who wish to turn kitties and puppies into vegetarians are the cruel and goofy ones.

GrumpyOldMan
9 years ago

I tend to support the idea of adopting an older cat, at least for your first one. You’re not committing yourself to as long a “sentence” if it turns out that being owned by a cat doesn’t work so well for you. (The drawback is, of course, that you’ll lose your devoted friend a lot sooner.) Older cats are harder to find homes for, so you can be close to certain that however you turn out as a Furrinati servant, the cat will be better off with you than in a shelter (and that’s assuming it’s a no-kill shelter — I’m sure I don’t have to draw a picture of what might happen to an older cat that remains unadopted too long at a shelter that is not no-kill). An older cat will probably have more medical issues so the insurance might be a good idea. Older cats have more settled personalities, so you’d have a better idea of whether a given cat fitted your situation, and they do tend to be less over-energetic than young cats and thus better suited for lying lazily around an apartment — as long as you put the lease in their name.
Nathan, it is my sense that you may be overthinking things a bit. A large majority of cats get along very well with at least one person — much better than they get along with other cats, in fact. Humans are extremely social by nature; cats tend to be loners … with one exception (their human servant). To them, other animals seem to fall into just a few hard-wired categories: large animal = predator, small animal = prey, kitten = kitten, other cat = competitor, and larger animal that feeds me and grooms me = Mother!!! In other words, the cat to human bonding seems to be based on the kitten to mother cat bond. In my experience, it is fairly rare for this kind of human-feline bond not to develop unless the cat is feral or semi-feral. On the other hand, cats do have individual personalities and don’t always follow generalizations. But I think you can be 98% sure that you’ll be a quite adequate Furrinati servant. The other 2% — well, nothing in life is certain. But cat/human relationships have a much higher success rate than human/human.

M. the Social Justice Ranger
M. the Social Justice Ranger
9 years ago

In my experience, it is fairly rare for this kind of human-feline bond not to develop unless the cat is feral or semi-feral.

And even if the cat is feral… My mum recently (well, within the past few years) took in two scrawny feral toms that she found lurking around her farm, and I can’t remember the last time we spoke on the phone without the now-desexed, vaccinated, fat and happy pair meowing their hellos from her lap!

(There are no guarantees with ferals, of course, but Ginger Tom and Tuxedo Mask are adorable, if saddled with the world’s most unimaginative names. =P)

GrumpyOldMan
9 years ago

My late sister fed a family of (apparent) ferals almost every day for over a decade. When she had to move she continued to feed then at her old apartment until a friend decided to trap them and bring them (inside) her new apartment. Even though she had fed them (and their parents and grandparents) for years, they hid in a corner under a table and wouldn’t come out to eat if she was in the room. It may be that it makes a lot of difference if they were house pets when young — a feral vs. a stray.

Amnesia
Amnesia
9 years ago

Good luck on your aspirations of servitude to cat-kind, Nathan!

Echoing the recommendation for getting a full-grown cat rather than a kitten. Also, wherever you get a cat, try to go in with the idea that the cat has to choose you. I mean, by all means, take into account your allergies and situation and even aesthetic preference (can’t help but love me ginger fluff-bombs myself) but if you don’t get the impression you’re what any given cat wants or needs, leave them be.
Some further advice from experience, don’t check out cats that aren’t immediately available for adoption. It turned out all right in my case, but only after a shitton of heartache. Never again.

Would fostering be an option worth considering? Asking fellow Mammotheers who’ve done it, cause I never have.

mildlymagnificent
9 years ago

As for cat “personality”. We got a salutary lesson from now-departed Pearl. She was one of three cats we had for years. We always thought of her as the cattest cat of the three. The other two spent a lot of time with the kids, sleeping on/in/under their beds, always looking for attention. She seemed more self-contained, self-sufficient … unless there was some element of competition, when she turned into a must-win-at-any-cost demon. This usually happened when we arrived home and all 3 were outside. She found all sorts of ways to be first — whether it was through the door or into the kitchen or head down in foodbowl — but she had to win.

Then they died off, one after the other, and she was the only cat. Within 2 days of the death of the second one, she’d had a complete personality “change”. Much more contented and affectionate. But it wasn’t really a change. We worked out that she had never wanted to be first, she wanted to be only. And it allowed her to show a different side. Now she wanted to sleep on our bed with us, to the extent that she’d stand in the doorway of the bedroom and call us to bed at the time that she had decided on.

I don’t know how easy that sort of thing is to pick on a simple viewing. I think of it as some cats preferring to be lone ranger tigers or leopards, and others happy to be part of a group, like lions.