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How A Voice for Men's Facebook memes inadvertently reveal the deep sexual insecurities underlying the misogyny of the Men's Rights movement

Detail of a perhaps inadertently revealing A Voice for Men meme
Detail of an unintentionally revealing A Voice for Men meme

The We Hunted the Mammoth Pledge Drive continues! If you haven’t already, please consider sending some bucks my way. (And don’t worry that the PayPal page says Man Boobz.) Thanks!

From time to time I like to check in on the Facebook page for A Voice for Men, to see how that eminent men’s human rights organization’s program to advance the human man rights of human men through badly designed and even more poorly conceived graphic “memes” is going.

Well, I can report that this program is going, and going, and going, a bit like a famous battery-powered bunny.

Looking through them today, I couldn’t help but notice the weird sexual undertones — and overtones — of many of the memes, and realized that, while none of the memes tell us much about the world, they do, in an altogehter accidental way, offer some pretty interesting insights into the ids of those making and “liking” them on Facebook.

You don’t have to be a trained psychoanalyst to see the not-very-well-hidden straight male sexual insecurities that lie behind a large number of AVFM’s memes — both the ones they create themselves and the others that seem to have arrived on the AVFM page after being forwarded via email from someone’s cranky misogynistic uncle. Let’s take a look at some of them.

1) AVFMers have apparently convinced themselves that the history of mankind is the story of nice guys being nice to snooty women who won’t date them.

 

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2) The straight men who make up the bulk of AVFM’s audience are pretty much terrified of women.

 

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3) A lot of these guys seem to really enjoy fantasizing about women being forced into crappy jobs and/or sex work.

 

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4) One of AVFM’s meme makers, the fellow who goes by the name of “John Galt,” has trouble distinguishing between the real world and certain (perhaps unacknowledged) sexual fetishes he appears to be a little obsessed with.

 

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5) Straight cis male AVFMers hate fat women who don’t please their boners, and are angry at feminists for convincing at least some fat women not to hate themselves.

 

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6) These AVFMers evidently prefer women who are very young, very thin, and photoshopped into anatomically implausible proportions and positions. But they simultaneously hate these women for giving them boners.

 

(Slightly censored version of the AVFM original.)
Perfect woman, or photoshop disaster? (Slightly censored version of the AVFM original.)

 

8) AVFMers really, really hate male feminists — and pretty much every man who doesn’t hate and fear women like they dO — and not-very-subtly project their own sexual insecurities onto them.

 

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9) They also really, really, really hate me.

 

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But I think that’s probably because they’re jealous that I have that second pair of arms.

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kittehserf
9 years ago

Some trivia I just read about Andre the Giant: as a child he was driven to school by Samuel Beckett, who was a neighbour.

Bina
9 years ago

About the meme in number 9, I don’t get the “no mum I’m busy” part. Obviously David is successful as the Managing Editor of a tabloid, so why would that be the title of his memoirs (I’m assuming it was an insinuation (and attempt at shaming) that he lives at home with his mother)?

I’m guessing that it’s actually the troll who made the meme who’s constantly saying that, because his mother constantly catches him wanking. Plus, the “mum” part would suggest that the troll is a Brit, which David is not.

Some trivia I just read about Andre the Giant: as a child he was driven to school by Samuel Beckett, who was a neighbour.

Yup!

http://www.themarysue.com/samuel-beckett-andre-the-giant/

And the wonders don’t end there:

http://www.vanityfair.com/vf-hollywood/2014/09/princess-bride-andre-the-giant-drinking-tales

Shiraz
Shiraz
9 years ago

Worst attempt at gaslighting ever. He’s all, “You’re all a bunch of meanies because I say so! No, I don’t know what feminism is — what’s your point? I don’t know what the term straw man means either, but that doesn’t stop me from using it! Meanies, I’m gonna flounce! You’re all so mean.”

Given the lack of sophistication, I’m going to guess Man Walk is 15 and already embracing misogyny as a hobby, ’cause getting to know women as humans is so very very hard. It’s easier to watch porn, yeah? Then to explore the internet and see women miffed at sexism? It must hurt his fragile eyes. Why are women always complaining, right, Man Walk? And why are they always denying the misogynistic stereotypes and the accompanying weirdo fantasies are good and true?

Kid, you’re hanging out with the wrong online crowd. Go outside. Join a book club. Take a history class. Life’s too short to adopt sexist bitterness as a religion because every woman you’ve ever met in real life doesn’t act like a one-dimensional character from a male dominated comedy film.

Shiraz
Shiraz
9 years ago

Also, the badly drawn meme above, where the ghost-like male figure is placing a coat over a puddle so a woman can walk over it without wetting her feet. Um, in what universe does that happen at all?

kittehserf
9 years ago

Bina, that will be a cool book to read when it comes out!

Poor Andre suffered acromegaly; that’s a hell of a rotten condition to have. No wonder he had to drink to numb it.

booburry
booburry
9 years ago

Lea’s comment

Manwalk your ass right back out the door.

had me cracking the hell up for some reason.
Much funnier than Dudewalk’s “Jeff Foxworthy goes after feminism” jokes. “If you dye your hair bright colors and rage against the patriarchy, you might be a feminist…hur hur”

weirwoodtreehugger
9 years ago

I’m watching the episode of Criminal Minds about a serial killer who is a PUA. I’ve seen the episode before but what I did not remember was that the killer was WEARING A FEDORA! Perfection! The episode was from 2008 before fedoras had become synonymous with misogyny. Very prescient.

The episode is called “52 Pickup” and it’s from season 4. Everyone needs to watch it. It’s on Netflix. At least the American Netflix. It’s glorious.

M. the Social Justice Ranger
M. the Social Justice Ranger
9 years ago

… I had to read all the way up to the silly walk posts before I realised that his name was ManWalk, not ManWank. Oops.

ManWank would be more fitting.

weirwoodtreehugger
9 years ago

I keep seeing “man wok” and imagining little cartoon MRAs simmering in a wok.

Kim
Kim
9 years ago

Lol. You sure are stupid ManWalk. You think MRA memes are super awesome, but you fail at basic reading comprehension when it’s simple sentences instead.

I hope this has made clear to you how people here feel about you and your meme, so you won’t continue to think anyone is being positive toward you.

Anarchonist
Anarchonist
9 years ago

I sort of liked him too, in a “toddler having a tantrum” kind of way. It’s still annoying that he failed to give a proper response. I wanted to laugh some more. Oh well.

In case you’re still reading this, WalkMan, remember that words mean things. Criticizing your comment is not the same as criticizing you as a person*. It is not anti-male to point out that your opinions are awful. On the internet, we have nothing but your comments to go by anyway, since we can’t see you as a person.

That is also why anti-feminists fail miserably whenever they go to feminist spaces and pretend to be women or minorities. They think this will shield them from criticism, as surely feminists would never criticize the comments of “one of theirs?” Wrong. It doesn’t matter who you are, if you’re saying something awful, you’re saying something awful. It’s not misogynistic, racist, homophobic or transphobic to point out that a position is hateful and wrong. Opinions are not people, and people are not opinions.

Look at the MRM’s video game oriented little brother, the #GamerGaters and their #NotYourShield bullshit. They seem utterly incapable of understanding the difference between criticizing a movement for its actions and criticizing a movement for the race and gender of some people involved in it.

It’s the online equivalent of hiding behind other people’s backs while you shout obscenities. It’s cowardly, and it shows that you don’t actually have a leg to stand on in a debate.

*For the record, yes, we mock you because your comments show that you’re an idiot.

Also, screencapping your opponent’s comment is only useful if 1) there’s a chance that the comment in question will be deleted. As said above, this is not 4chan. Comments generally stay, unless the mods and David deem them too awful (as the comment by a victim blaming MRA might be). 2) it’s so vile, so hateful, so astoundingly terrible that it should be saved for future reference. For instance, many of the comments and articles David highlights on his blog. Many by Paul “some women are damn near begging to be raped”/ “if I was on a jury, I would vote to release the rapist even if I knew he was guilty”/ “beat her to a pulp and make her clean up the bloody mess” Elam. You will find nothing on this blog that is so unbelievably evil as the things the head of AVfM says on a regular basis.

So screencap away, Dancing Monkey. I’m sure it will do you a world of good if you show the screencaps to anyone who doesn’t already have an axe to grind with feminists.

alaisvex
alaisvex
9 years ago

Who made the hateful, anti-male comment that made ManWalk flounce? Was it Lea saying, “ManWalk your ass out the door?” I’ll bet that it was that one.

kittehserf
9 years ago

I wonder if FallingOverHisOwnFeetMan has twigged that some people on this blog are men.

kittehserf
9 years ago

It was the very mention of male tears, I think, alaisvex.

M. the Social Justice Ranger
M. the Social Justice Ranger
9 years ago

I wonder if FallingOverHisOwnFeetMan has twigged that some people on this blog are men.

I’ll never get over just how few trolls realise that even though the Dark Lord is named DAVID and it says so on EVERY PAGE.

kittehserf
9 years ago

LOL! And the ones that do nearly drown in their own drool, spluttering about him being a mangina, traitor, etc, etc.

sunnysombrera
9 years ago

I’ll never get over just how few trolls realise that even though the Dark Lord is named DAVID and it says so on EVERY PAGE.

IKR. And yet they still come crashing in all “You evil hamster feeemales are making us look bad lol u r dumb also ow my manfeels! :(“

Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
9 years ago

Given the lack of sophistication, I’m going to guess Man Walk is 15 and already embracing misogyny as a hobby,

That makes a certain amount of sense. Only somebody still in high school would think the “overqualified person works at McDonald’s, would you like fries with that hurr hurr” joke is fresh and original.

The cycle is so predictable.

1. Publish hateful meme or comment bullying women
2. Sensible people point out that this is unacceptable
3. “WAAAAAAH! YOU’RE MEAN MEANIE BULLIES!”

It’s exactly like a three year old getting angry at Mommy for telling them to stop hitting their sister and smearing poo on the walls.

Pointing out bad behavior =/= said bad behavior. I’m so sick of manospherians and right-wingers in general doing this. “You called me racist? Oh yeah, well, you’re the racist for playing the race card!” It’s because they literally have nothing else to deflect attention away from their own cruddiness.

There really should be a “playing the victim card” card.

M. the Social Justice Ranger
M. the Social Justice Ranger
9 years ago

Don’t forget the classic “Why aren’t you tolerant of my lack of tolerance?! You’re a bigot against bigots!”

sunnysombrera
9 years ago

It’s exactly like a three year old getting angry at Mommy for telling them to stop hitting their sister and smearing poo on the walls.

Reminds me of a paraphrased quote by Amanda Marcotte that goes “If you scratch the surface of an MRA you find a guy who is upset that someone’s keeping him from beating his wife and kids whenever he feels like it.”

Source: http://freethoughtblogs.com/almostdiamonds/2011/09/22/mra-says-yep-were-domestic-abusers/

sunnysombrera
9 years ago

Also, “women do it to men too!” Like that’s supposed to shut down the discussion somehow. IF it’s even true.

DJG
DJG
9 years ago

@ WWTH – I remember bits of that episode of Criminal Minds, mostly the interactions of two of the team with the Alpha PUA who gave classes; did he emerge partially discredited?

gilshalos
9 years ago

*sulks* Netflix only has the Criminal Minds spin off here. Not the original 🙁

gilshalos
9 years ago

Though Forrest Whittaker is good in it!

Bina
9 years ago

Bina, that will be a cool book to read when it comes out!

Poor Andre suffered acromegaly; that’s a hell of a rotten condition to have. No wonder he had to drink to numb it.

No effin’ kidding. He was only 46 when he died of it, too. Damn shame, because André sounds like a great guy.

‘nother piece of trivia: When between takes on The Princess Bride, André used his big hand to keep Robin Wright’s head warm, because it was freezing cold out and she was shivering. Also, he made frequent trips to France for the food, and brought some back for everyone. Yum!

…oh shit, I’m forgetting to misander properly, ain’t I?