The Alpha Dogs on the Red Pill Subreddit are totally taking “text game” to the next level.
You know how it is when a Hot Babe 8 texts you and you start typing out a reply because, you know, that’s what people do when they get texts, and then you get ready to click “send” because that’s how you send texts? DON’T DO IT! SENDING TEXTS WHEN YOU WRITE THEM IS TOTALLY BETA.
Instead, show her who’s boss by scheduling your text to be sent later. THEN SHE’LL THINK YOU REPLIED LATER BECAUSE YOU’RE SO COOL AND BUSY AND ALOOF and totally not desperate to get in her pants or anything!
And your phone makes it easy! As noahbish explains:
She’ll be like, why didn’t he answer me, maybe I’m ugly and he’s too SUPERCOOL for me, and totally not someone playing stupid high school dating games by scheduling his response for later because, really, who would even do that.
Truly, there is nothing more alpha as fuck than scheduling your texts so you won’t seem beta as fuck.
Also another totally cool thing you can do is to text “370HSSV 0773H” to people and when they ask what it means tell them to turn their phone upside down. Ha ha! OWNED.
Ellesar,
They believe that women are incapable of rational thought and their brains are analogous to hamsters running on a wheel.
I can only imagine what kind of wonderful women these kinds of men end up ensnaring– women so self-loathing and devoid of any shred of self-esteem that they put up with this kind of B.S. I mean seriously, they realize that strong, intelligent, emotionally stable women see through this in and instant and move the fuck on? Perhaps we should be thankful that they’re upfront about their misogyny, it keeps most women from wasting their time with these ass-hats. It really is a vicious cycle- their unshakable belief that all women are stupid, shallow and over-emotional causes them to treat all women this way, thus driving away any woman that doesn’t fit their stereotypes. And when the poor souls that do allow men to treat them like trash remain- this only reinforces the idea that this is how all women really are.
I don’t text and I don’t answer the phone unless it is a number in the address list. Actually, not even if it shows up as a name. I hate phone calls.
Late night texts… I don’t actually sleep anywhere near where I put my phone at night. So I generally don’t see late texts till sometime the next morning. Does that make me ultra alpha? Does it increase my randomly assigned numerical value?
On the other hand, I now know I can schedule texts! I am going to have fun with this; my eldest now has a text-only phone, and I can schedule annoying texts to zir even when zie is busy. Mwahahaha.
Oh what a tangled web we weave. These alpha dudebro can’t never be honest, is really is sad.
Puddleglum, you are an evil genius.
Puddleglum: I sleep near my phone but texts don’t wake me up.
I’d be annoyed if a guy would only text back late at night after I’d texted him first thing in the morning, a wait of what, 16 hours? The fact that he hasn’t forgotten my text entirely tells me he’s just putting it off to the end of the day and that communication with me is lowest priority on his list. Surely he’s not so busy that he can’t spare a few minutes to patter out a few words with his thumbs. So I’d assume that he was doing it because he didn’t really care. Or he was playing mind games with me. And in the case of a PUA, both things would be true.
I love how they think “tools” are needed to help them gain mastery in relationships. Hey, it worked for cavemen banging on rocks, it’ll work on 21st century women!
Putting texts on a time delay is all about controlling the conversation, to the point of not actually having one. Never mind that for most people, “bs chatter” is what turns initial attraction into something more. Red Pillers want to be able to just point and grunt, like they’re in a candy store.
Twist ending: girl is actually an insomniac, she receives the text at night and is delighted to see he’s up, so she calls him to chat until she can get sleepy again, waking HIM up in the middle of the night.
Also what do they do if they meet a woman who doesn’t have a cellphone?
Scheduling texts is going to be almost as much fun as when we had two remotes to the tv (‘why is the mute still on?’ hits button to turn it off, it magically turns back on, ‘I think the tv’s broken’). Good times.
Lea – I knew my husband was a keeper on our second date. We walked into what we thought was a pub – turned out it morphed into a noisy club on weekend nights.
We stood around for a about a minute looking uncomfortable, and then I yelled into his ear, “Do you want to stay here?”
“No!”
And then we went to a diner that served craft beer and talked until they threw us out.
I guess that was, like, the most beta thing ever to an MRA.
My phone is also my pager; due to the nature of my work, my patients can contact me 24/7 in case of emergency (luckily, this is extremely rare in the job I have now). But everyone (patients, friends, family) knows not to call or text after 10 pm because they WILL wake me up, and I WILL be grumpy if it’s not an emergency. No one likes me when I’m grumpy.
And the award for Best Turn of Phrase of the Year goes to…
Lea, for
Congratulations! You win a kitty-shaped scented candle with a complimentary jar of bonbons.
@puddleglum:
Or when cars first started getting the electronic locks and horn button remote things.
A never-ending parade of counterproductive techniques. The pickup crowd is self-reinforcing by being self-defeating.
This is just freaking ridiculous. So, instead of just talking to a woman, they’re going to put a whole lot of time and effort into pretending to talk to a woman?
And you can’t just put the word “game” after something and it magically becomes some kind of super-dooper dating strategy. Purposefully waiting to reply to a message from someone with the intent of “keeping them on their heels” is passive-aggression manipulation, not some great manly-man alpha male strategy.
I guess I am uber-beta, which I suppose is a gamma or deta, possibly epsilon male as I send my texts before I compose them.
Same. I put my phone on the charger in the living room. A call will wake me but the ping from a text of e-mail will not. It’s almost like I don’t really feel the need to answer any messages that come in while I sleep. I AM ALPHA AS FUCK!!!
Off topic: Target in Australia is pulling the latest Grand Theft Auto because they got complaints about violence against women. Boy are the gamer bros throwing tantrums over it. Just read the comments section. Or don’t if you don’t want a desk shaped dent in your forehead. http://kotaku.com/target-australia-pulls-gta-v-due-to-depictions-of-sexua-1666096131/all
Funny how feminists aren’t allowed to criticize games because businesses can do whatever they want. But when a business does something they don’t like, they throw a fit.
@Dodom
That’s a really awesome twist ending. Headcanon accepted.
What do you mean, I can’t have headcanon about nonsense dating strategies? NONSENSE! 😀
Nobody I know is a prompt texter unless you catch them at a quiet moment when they’re by their phone. Mostly they’ll be off doing something and the phone will be charging or just chilling on a table in the next room. I’m pretty much the same. And quite often, as I’m sure happens at the other end as well, I’ll get a text when kinda in the middle of something, I’ll read it and think “this isn’t urgent, I’ll reply when I can sit down and focus on it properly.” Then sometimes I forget until late at night, so I make a mental note to reply with a quick apology the next day because you never know when you’ll be disturbing someone. Obviously if I get a text saying “I’m in a shop buying a thing, would you also like a thing?” or “are we still on for dinner tonight?” I’m prompt, same with everyone I know.
I don’t know……how does this concept fly over people’s heads?
That said I’m a member of a casual sex site purely for the lulz (there are many) and too often I sign in to find a load of message chains like:
Bob, 17:12
Heyyy love your pics, want 2 chat?
Bob, 17:17
Hello?
Bob, 18:12
Ignore me then
Bob, 18:42
Stuck up bitch!
…motherfucker I was out! Do you sit online all fucking day every fucking day? What is wrong with these people?
Ha, cue chorus of whiners equating Target not selling it in Australia to it being banned in Australia.
Let’s not forget that it just isn’t the need to look totally aloof, but by spacing out your replies until after she’s in bed, you add that whole control dimension of Sleep Deprivation…which is sooooo Alpha
I’m sure the women appreciate being spared your “bs chatter” as well, alpha bro.
I would like a scientific breakdown of just how successful these guys who spend all their time scheming about women on Reddit are in their dating lives. They remind me of doomsday preppers in the sheer amount of time and money they’ve sunk into a mockably useless pursuit.
@Plaat
My guess would be not too successful. The time you spend on one thing is time you’re not spending on another thing. It’s not like the Internet and an active social life are mutually incompatible, but there is a direct trade-off in time, and the guys who spend hours on Reddit are not spending those hours on all the fun dates they claim to have.