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Hey GamerGaters, do you even lift?

No, weightifting in Grand Theft Auto doesn't count.
No, weightifting in Grand Theft Auto doesn’t count.

Before he decided to attach himself to the #GamerGate “movement,” Breitbart writer and all-around douchebag Milo Yiannopoulos took a certain pleasure in baiting gamer “nerds,” a demographic he once described as a bunch of “pungent beta-male bollock-scratchers and twelve-year olds.”

He’s not the only self-appointed #GamerGate savior who doesn’t seem to have much respect for the group he’s ostensibly championing. Over on Reaxxion — the atrociously written pro-GamerGate game site run by pickup guru and non-gamer Roosh — one writer implores fellow gamers to quite literally put down their controllers and pick up weights.

In 5 Reasons Why Gamers Should Life Weights, Alexander Anderson urges gamer nerds to become gamer jocks, and not just because regular exercise is good for your health. In Anderson’s mind, weightlifting nerds can also challenge the stereotype of gamers as “socially awkward, passive, uncool, and physically unappealing” nerds by not, you know, embodying the stereotypes so completely themselves.

Go to a gaming gathering event and pay attention to the other people around you. Look at how they dress and how they communicate with each other. Pay attention to their body language, tone of voice, mannerism, and what they talk about. Then go to a sporting event and repeat the process. Which group of people would an average person prefer to be around?

HINT: You’re supposed to pick the sports fans.

The solution? Lifting, bro!

If all gamers start lifting weights, it will help combat the public perception of gamers as unsociable cave dwellers.

And even if Anderson can’t convince every World of Warcrafter to hit the gym, at least those who do lift will have “an edge over other gamers.”

Humans subconsciously prefer the company of those who are bigger, stronger, and smarter than the rest. You will stand out among your gamer friends if you are the only one in the room with muscles. Your social standing will increase, your health will improve and you will gain more confidence from regularly exercising.

Huh. I thought GamerGaters wanted gaming to be a “safe space” for nerds, not another arena in which jocks get to lord it over them.

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ParadoxicalIntention
9 years ago

PocketNerd

Why do I get the feeling Milo Yiannopoulos telling gamers they are flat-out inadequate and need to change themselves will generate far less hate than than Anita Sarkeesian or Brianna Wu suggesting games could be better?

Because Milo’s a bro who understands bros and gamer bros look up to him.

Anita and Brianna are silly wimmens who don’t understand gaming because their hormones get in the way of logical reasoning, obviously. [/sarcasm]

But mostly it’s just the hypocrisy that’s already present in their movement.

“We’re inclusive!” (posts neo-nazi propaganda of women who disagree with them, harass and threaten women, call anyone who disagrees with them a “SJW” or a “feminazi”, then turn around and say that “no true GGer” does such things)

“We’re not sexist!” (only targets female developers, and leaves their male critics pretty much alone)

“It’s about ethics in game journalism!” (only talks shit about small female-driven indie games instead of the bullshit that the AAA devs do on a regular fucking basis)

C.S.Stowbridge

I’ve talked to a number of GGers about this and everyone I’ve talked to has forgiven him for this, because he claimed he said it before he knew what gamers were really like.

Of course they did. Anita and Brianna know what gamers are like, but fuck them. Milo is just learning and he “didn’t know what we were like back then! Take it easy on him!”

Blind devotion is a dangerous thing.

sunnysombrera

Community Question: if you could be great at any sport, what would it be? I’m torn between rock climbing and kitesurfing.

I’m torn between pole dancing and belly dancing. I have a friend who has done the latter, and she says it’s REALLY fun. Her and her sister both do it, and they both look fabulous! (I blame the amazing costumes they get to wear while dancing and the fact that they’re both really pretty.)

And I would like to attempt pole dancing because it looks really fun too. (That, and your upper body strength needs to be amazeballs, and I think my upper body could use a little more attention.)

Though now that Pallygirl mentions it, parkour looks cool too. : /

So many choices…

Bina
9 years ago

Why do these people always fixate on lifting? Why is it never “If you want to get popular, become a long distance marathon runner or yoga expert”?

Because that’s not Alpha Male Shit™. Belch, fart, grunt.

kittehserf
9 years ago

ParadoxicalIntention – my bff is in a belly dancing troupe, and she loves it. It’s really hard exercise, but lots of fun.

ParadoxicalIntention
9 years ago

AltoFronto

If I could just tap in a cheat code and be awesome at something, those are the stats I would pick, though.

*quickly Googles “how do I open up the command console on Life the RPG?”*

Pocket Nerd
9 years ago
Reply to  A Wolverine

Thus Spake ZaraA Wolverine:

I’ve assumed that in a apocalyptic scenario Gold would become mostly worthless.

Its heavy as hell and has almost no inherent value aside from being a good conductor of electricity

I’ve tried explaining this to survivalists and goldbugs. The usual response is waffling about “inherent value”. Because gold is magic, apparently.

Catalpa
Catalpa
9 years ago

Not to say that sporty people can’t have interesting conversations or be sociable, but generally people enjoy hanging around others who have similar interests to them. Jocks can absolutely have nerdy interests, and nerds can have sporty interests, but hedging your bets would be to go to a gathering of people you KNOW have similar interests to you, rather than going to a group where they might all talk about things you have no interest in. So if a nerd goes to a gaming store and then to a weight lifting competition, chances are they’d enjoy socializing more in the former than the latter.

Of course, if you’re looking to expand your interests and learn, getting out of your inner circle is a good idea, it’s just not always the most comfortable process.

beegees
beegees
9 years ago

Awww, Mr. Anderson, does it make you feel bad about yourself when see guys that don’t look like sculpted Ken dolls feel good about themselves? Does it remind you of the flaws and inadequacies that you hide behind LIFTING? Too bad you won’t be able to dodge bullets like Neo if you focus on is looking good to the exclusion of functional strength and balance.

If I could be magically good at one sport it would be basketball. I’ve always loved playing, and I’ve always sucked.

Wetherby
Wetherby
9 years ago

Parkour can look cool if done properly. But sometimes it isn’t.

Sarah
Sarah
9 years ago

I love this thread!

Wow, this guy is super invested in the idea that having massive guns will somehow make you a more interesting or sociable person.

LOL

Yeah, come on, gamers. Stop being misogynists in the privacy of your darkened bedroom and go be misogynists at the gym and the bar, like us PUAs. How will women ever know how much you hate them if you don’t get out more?

ROFL
Yeah it’s like it’s a site set up by a PUA not-gamer to tell gamers to stop being gamers and become PUAs.

Meanwhile, most of the geeks I know are into really awesome stuff like table-top gaming, battle re-enactment*, hilariously awful sci-fi B-movies, roller derby, and crafting.

Do we know each other?

Community Question: if you could be great at any sport, what would it be?

HANG GLIDING!!!
(the community isn’t great and the equipment is bulky and heavy but you get to FLY)

Also @Luzbelitx, did you see the “la corpo fichinera” article in the latest “suplemento no” of pagina/12? http://www.pagina12.com.ar/diario/suplementos/no/12-7382-2014-11-27.html
(for the rest, it’s an article in a supplement of a -supposedly progressive- Argentinian newspaper with a not even wrong pro-gamergate article that I wanted to share with Luzbelitx)

beegees
beegees
9 years ago

 “Okay, so you’ve got steel-reinforced doors and a hidden room with a cache of assault rifles — what are you going to eat? A few bites of gold bullion a day?”

Don’t you see? Farming is sooo beta. Alfas like them use their assault rifles to steal what they want because alpha males never lose a fight, get hurt, or even break a sweat. It’s been proven in movies!

I am slowly building up a small supply of food and water because the last time a major storm came through I spent a week without electricty and it sucked. I had to go to two different stores the day before the storm to find bottled water. :/

If you really want to “prep” you should start planting fruit and nut trees now as many types of fruits and nuts take years before they produce a good harvest. Also, many online prep stores sell sealed containers of heirloom veggie seed that will be viable for decades. They breed true so you can save the seeds from the veggies andget the same veggie plants next year.

Sarah
Sarah
9 years ago

There’s already plenty of overlap between people who like nerdy stuff and people who like sporty stuff. Why do manospherians always view people as one dimensional high school movie characters? Most people actually have varied interests and different personality facets. I suppose because PUAs are incredibly shallow they think everyone else is too.

Yeah… I’m a more than fairly nerdy type and was totally out-geeked by this awesome roller derby skater (really really athletic girl) friend of mine at Halloween when she came with a costume I didn’t recognise and she was like ‘do you even play video games’? I loved it 🙂

Fabe
Fabe
9 years ago

WOW,more proof of what a joke the whole gamergate movement is. All you have to do to become a hero to these guys is to claim to hate woman and they’ll worship the ground you walk on no matter how many times you insulted them. As for the Community question I would like to be really good at snowboarding and disk golf.

Michael Healy (@MichaelHealy18)

Hey remember this? http://www.donotlink.com/framed?592582

“We won’t tell you to go to the gym and live in Eastern Europe to sleep with thin women, behaviors that I currently engage in.”

So much for that eh?

kittehserf
9 years ago

Pocket Nerd:

I’ve tried explaining this to survivalists and goldbugs. The usual response is waffling about “inherent value”. Because gold is magic, apparently.

Especially when it’s LIQUID FUCKING GOLD!

bspencer (@vacuumslayer)

They’re cool with it so long as the jocks hate women, too.

Rabukurafuto
Rabukurafuto
9 years ago

I am slowly building up a small supply of food and water because the last time a major storm came through I spent a week without electricty and it sucked. I had to go to two different stores the day before the storm to find bottled water. :/

If you really want to “prep” you should start planting fruit and nut trees now as many types of fruits and nuts take years before they produce a good harvest. Also, many online prep stores sell sealed containers of heirloom veggie seed that will be viable for decades. They breed true so you can save the seeds from the veggies andget the same veggie plants next year.

Apparently the earliest survivalist types were hippies who wanted to go “back to the land” in case there was an environmental catastrophe. It sounds like they would have understood this sort of thing better and outlast the guys who just want to stockpile guns and gold in case there ever was a situation like this.

Cyberwulf
Cyberwulf
9 years ago

“Community Question: if you could be great at any sport, what would it be?”

Jiu-jitsu. I’m working towards my black belt at the moment.

Also I’d like to travel back in time and get laser eye surgery and become a camogie all-star.

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
9 years ago

Pallygirl and Sarah got my two picks for sports. Flying or free-running would be awesome to be great at, parkour especially since it comes with a whole host of fitness-related things.

Rock climbing would be another pick for me.

Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
9 years ago

Why do these people always fixate on lifting? Why is it never “If you want to get popular, become a long distance marathon runner or yoga expert”?

Because yoga isn’t useful training for dominating and terrifying women. Massive biceps are better at controlling your female sex-dispensing unit and warding off competition than Downward Facing Dog.

Besides parkour, I would like to be really good at surfing. Because that would mean I’d be living in a beautiful tropical location with warm breezes and white sandy beaches. (People do surf around here, but the water is chilly and the beaches are rocky. Sometimes we have epic three-foot waves.)

Tracy
Tracy
9 years ago

Community Question: if you could be great at any sport, what would it be? I’m torn between rock climbing and kitesurfing.

Joining with the parkour chorus – looks so amazing to just run and jump around like that. Also gymnastics and white water kayacking. I’d also love to do amazing feats of strength, like the human flag, because – wow, just the feeling of mastery over your own body. Plus, it would give me something to show off during Festivus, after the Airing of Grievances.

I lift weights for strength training purposes – getting stronger, improving bone density, and because it’s fun to me. I love it. But I’d recommend a source like Nerd Fitness, where they talk about things like figuring out your role-playing profession and have a Nintendo Cheat Code workout, over douchey-bro sparkle-gym my-ego-benches-350 Anderson here. (I bet he clangs his weights, hogs the squat rack for bench presses, and never wipes down equipment after he uses it. The bastard!)

Tracy
Tracy
9 years ago

@Buttercup Q. Skullpants I think you’re right, and also because for them it’s not about being strong so much as it is about being BIG… which is also something they can lord over other men. It’s not difficult to tell who’s at the gym because they’re working on their own, personal goals and who’s there for bro reasons.

Also there’s this idea that yoga is ‘for women’, I think, and of course yoga doesn’t GET U BIG BRO RAWRR. Getting strong and healthy (for it’s own sake) is not a priority for them, and you have to be pretty strong to do this:

http://www.doyouyoga.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/Pungu-Mayurasana-Wounded-Peacock-Pose.jpg

http://www.doyouyoga.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/Eka-Hasta-Vrksasana-One-Handed-Tree-Pose.jpg

proxieme
proxieme
9 years ago

In more heartening gaming news:

http://www.themarysue.com/dai-krem/

fruitloopsie
fruitloopsie
9 years ago

This reminds me of the point and click games douchebag beach, douchebag life and others too.

Mizuki
Mizuki
9 years ago

For the sports, I would pick either gymnastics or martial arts. I did a bit of gymnastics at camp and I would love to be good at it (it would encompass a lot of skills as an added benefit.) I have always loved martial arts, particularly Aikido, so being a master at it would be amazing.