So you waited until the last minute to pull together your #GamerGate Halloween costume. And you’re lazy as crap.
Well, you’re in luck! Here are seven totally half-assed, no-effort #GamerGate costumes you can pull together in a few minutes with stuff you have around the house!
1) Milo Yiannopoulos, #GamerGate’s favorite “ethical” journalist
Download the pic at the top of this post, print it out (choose “fit picture to frame” so it’ll be the right size), cut it out and cut out the eyes, attach it to your face somehow, and ta da!
For added realism, pepper your conversation with complaints about feminist “bullies,” expound on why you think poor people are genetically programmed to steal things, declare Malala Yousafzai a frumpy bore, and explain to anyone who will listen why white middle-class men are the REAL persecuted minority these days.
2) An angry, hour-long YouTube video about Anita Sarkeesian
Cut a YouTube-video-shaped hole out of a piece of cardboard, draw some crap on the front of it with red and black markers to make it look like a YouTube page, hold it up in front of your face, and start droning on incoherently about how Anita is a scam artist who totally made up all those threats and when you played Hitman you didn’t make a pile out of dead strippers who would even do that anyway Anita no one that’s who what a liar I don’t condone the threats against her but she plugged her book on Twitter after that shooting ok it wasn’t her book but I bet she got a kickback because that’s just the sort of person she is also she’s trying to hypnotize me with adverbs.
3) A confusing infographic.
#GamerGaters love making ridiculously convoluted and confusing infographics, often featuring assorted screenshots carefully annotated with red arrows drawn in MS Paint. Now you can be one of these infographics! Just print out the pic above and tape it to the front of your shirt. (Thanks to @lindsay40k on Twitter for designing this lovely faux infographic.)
4) A sockpuppet
Take a sock from your laundry hamper, attach some googly eyes to it — or just draw some on with a sharpie — and ta da! Now you’re ready to post comments online as someone else — or win the costume contest at a Halloween party!
5) A Twitter account with three followers and a stock photo of a woman and/or person of color as the profile picture
Are you a straight white cis dude who’d like to do some #NotYourShield-ing on Twitter? Now you can! Find a stock photo of a woman and/or POC, print it out, and tape it to your shirt. Whenever anyone asks who that is in the picture, tell them it’s you!
6) A non-serious death threat
Everyone knows that death threats sent over the internet shouldn’t be taken seriously — everyone, that is, except the silly Social Justice Warriors who get them! This Halloween, you too can be a totally non-serious death threat! Just write “I am going to kill you” on an old t-shirt. Then make silly faces all night so everyone knows not to take you seriously!
7) A gigantic piece of shit
It goes without saying that many if not most #GamerGaters are huge pieces of shit. Now you can be one too! Find a piece of brown cardboard, cut it into the shape of a piece of poop, cut a hole in the middle to stick your head through, and ta da! You are #GamerGate, personified. Or should I say poopsonified.
Happy Halloween!
Bah. I have to work tonight so I’ll be going as a nationwide craft store chain employee again. But if anyone asks*, I’ll totally tell them that I’m ethix in vidya game jernalizm. So, thanks Shaenon!
*Totes won’t happen; there’s few places in the world more deserted than the craft store on Halloween night!
@david: loved the photos. My favourite is you as Jordan, you captured existential dread really well in that one.
@DStunt Rocker:
Maybe because they are extremely invested in scaring the little girl?
I love the Youtube video costume. If I ever get invited to a fancy dress party, that’s what I’m going as.
I was going to wear a black top and black slacks, and go as “A Night.” But now, I think I’ll go as The Encroaching Doom of the Most High and Sacred Hobby. a.k.a, a Gamer Girl.
HCK – FIFTEEN THOUSAND DOLLARS!!!
You cracked me up.
““Actually, I’m ethics in video game journalism.””
Oh, my gosh! I busted a gut laughing! I love it!
Also, those pics of “Jordan” and “Aurini” are wonderful!
The only problem with dressing up for Halloween tonight is that I have to pull myself away from my game to do it. It’s Double XP Weekend on Runescape, y’all!
I’m going to a wedding tonight, and the dress code is wear black and a mask. I have a cat mask but I’ll tell people I’m actually the cat in charge of ethics in video game journalism.
I went to work today cunningly disguised as a nurse, as did most of my colleagues. Except for one supervisor who went as Annoying Orange.
No one dressed as crippling self doubt again this year? Henri will be disappoint.
Traffic cone, am I. But actually, it’s about ethics in game journalism.
I dressed as Chell from Portal and escorted my little trick-or-treater around.
One candy bar and my baby boy is up til 11. Lightweight.
Chell! Yay, Chell.
David, those pics are awesome and terrifying.
MaudeLL, Itkessler, & Anastasia, nice!
Also, all the ethics in games journalism costumes rock.
Falconer, my sympathy. Ours had two fun size candies…I shudder to think of the effects a full candy bar would have.
No Halloween fun for me tonight 🙁
I had to work and have to get up early to work tomorrow. I’m in the midst of a 9 day work week because it’s the final days until the election. But at least I get paid a full day to attend a short meeting and then go to a work party on Wed. and after that get 6 days off. Can’t wait!
Sorry, no, it was a fun-sized Nestle Crunch.
We are having our big Halloween party tomorrow night. But tonight we got a fair number of trick-or-treaters, more than last year.
I had a wee werewolf and a wee cowboy show up at my door, and nobody else. I gave them criminal amounts of tiny chocolate bars.
Here’s a pretty good article http://rhrealitycheck.org/article/2014/10/28/talk-guy-friends-threatening-rape-murder-women-internet/
The comment section however, is even better. I think some of those troll busting commenters would make excellent mammotheers.
I think my cat is annoyed that I wouldn’t let her go outside and play with the kids, but a. she’s not an outdoor cat and b. she’s a tuxedo, and people sometimes do horrible things to black cats at Halloween.
The kids are adorable though.
All night I tried to convince our black cat to sit in the window and she refused. Typical.
Being 1 November, the local stationary shop had a large remote controlled black widow spider on sale for half price. We have been amusing ourselves chasing the cats with it. Basically, this: http://www.dx.com/p/remote-controlled-simulation-black-widow-spider-toy-4-x-aaa-139158#.VFTBx8m2Tgk
It runs on wheels underneath, but the legs move a bit as it runs along. The cats aren’t too sure of it.
I took my older son to see “Ouija”, which is technically a horror movie. It was actually his idea. Still getting used to the idea of him wanting to leave the house, but it was great going with him. I can tell how much of a parent I’ve become when the detail that challenges my suspension of disbelief is how neat and clean a teenage character’s bedroom is.