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advocacy of violence attention seeking domestic violence doubling down empathy deficit entitled babies men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny MRA paul elam why can't men punch women?

Paul Elam responds to critics of his phony White Ribbon page with reasoned argument. Kidding! He had a tantrum

Paul Elam: U mad?
Paul Elam: He seems mad.

Paul Elam, the maximum leader of hate site A Voice for Men, has responded to the first wave of media coverage of his phony White Ribbon site with a truculent little rant.

Salon.com, Thinkprogress.org and the ever intellectually flatulent David Futrelle have rage-written on this issue barely 24 hours after we launched the site.

How does he know about the flatulence? In my defense, I’m still recovering from Dollar Taco Tuesday.

I was also just interviewed by Cosmopolitan Magazine, being asked such incisive questions as, “Do you think it is ever OK to hit a woman?”

I imagine that Cosmo was just trying to get a reaction from him, since it’s fairly well-known, at least among those who follow the Men’s Rights set,  that Elam’s answer to the hitting women question is yes, yes, a thousand times yes! Indeed, Elam can barely restrain himself on the subject, having penned a short story, an allegedly “satirical” post and a serious, non-satirical post all laying out his case for punching women, and not only in self-defense.

Elam pauses his rant for a moment to make the whimsical assertion that his phony WhiteRibbon.org site is an “attempt to insert empiricism and genuine expertise into the discussion of violence in the home” before setting forth what he calls “a few facts” that he thinks will answer all questions.

One, White Ribbon Campaign is not trademarked by anyone. Deal with it.

Sorry, Paul. I don’t think this is the get out of jail card you think it is. The real White Ribbon campaign could assert common law trademark rights. It’s been around since 1991.

His other facts are kind of boring, so let’s just move on to the heart of the tantrum:

I have a message for Salon, ThinkProgress, Futrelle and anyone else bashing us for presenting valid research on a very real social problem. It is a message I will not use to sully the pages of WhiteRibbon.org.

This message is this: Go right straight to Hell you gang of bigoted, lying scumbags. That is, if Hell will even have you pieces of shit. …

That’s it. Write motherfuckers. Whine. Complain. Cry in your fucking Cheerios. The only thing you will ever accomplish is helping us spread the truth.

U mad bro?

I think he’s mad.

Oh, and one last thing. Send your lawyers. We will be happy to ride them for a while just for the fun of watching you pay the fucking bill.

Uh, who exactly are you talking to here? I’m pretty sure that neither I nor Salon nor ThinkProgress will be sending any lawyers. Someone else might, though. I guess we’ll have to see how that works out.

P.S. And while we’re talking about the spiteful immaturity of AVFMers, here’s an AVFM post from the YouTuber blabber “Mad Shangi” in which he actually boasts about acting like an obtuse diskhead in an, er, “debate” with me on Twitter.

More proof that it’s pointless to actually try to discuss anything with people who are either terminally thickheaded, or posting in bad faith, or, as seems to be the case with Mr. Shangi, a bit of both.

 

 

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samantha
10 years ago
Reply to  freemage

Wow. I generally despise Cosmo–they just do way too much gender policing and bad sex advice (as in, “Never tell a man what you want, make him guess because only Slutty McSluts use their words”) to be treated as anything but a bad joke, but that article did a nice job of ripping through Elam’s bullshit.

Thank you, Cosmo writer Jill Filipovic, for the wonderful article. And thank you, freemage, for putting up the link. You have made my day!

Verux
Verux
10 years ago

Gasp! A domestic violence website… with information about MEN being abused? Paul Elam must be stopped! How dare he try to fight domestic violence against men? Wehuntedthemammoth.com, you show him whose boss. Teach him a lesson for trying to fight domestic violence against all genders equally instead of saying only women are victims and (as we all know) men are barbaric savage abusers from their birth.

Oh my god are you joking? Sarcasm aside, what is so bad about when a Men’s Rights website tries to handle such a terrible crime without sexism and neglecting one group’s suffering? A Voice for Men is about gender equality and combating gender discrimination and abuse on a 50/50 scale whereas your precious feminists encourage violence against men. Paul Elam is simply trying to fulfill white ribbon,’s ultimate goal of ending domestic violence. If this feminist – joke – of – a – site is too foolish to understand that men can be victims too and the feminist cult’s ideas aren’t the one and only answer, that’s fine, there are people out there with below average I levels (a sad reality). Just don’t insult the movement that is helping men AND women alike or its benevolent leader who is helping out domestic abuse victims.

Before you whine about a man helping victims of a tragic experience, actually do something about domestic abuse instead of insulting, shaming, and neglecting it’s victims AND the people who are actually helping them. You ought to be ashamed of yourself, encouraging violence against men and women but attacking them people who try to help them

Sincerely, A Man with Principles and Honor.

M. the Social Justice Ranger
M. the Social Justice Ranger
10 years ago

Shut up, Verux.

pallygirl
pallygirl
10 years ago

Before you whine about a man helping victims of a tragic experience, actually do something about domestic abuse instead of insulting, shaming, and neglecting it’s victims AND the people who are actually helping them. You ought to be ashamed of yourself, encouraging violence against men and women but attacking them people who try to help them

Dudebro, it’s not our side doing this. We’re not the ones promoting toxic masculinity where women “deserve” to be hit or raped, we’re not the ones trying to online hijack a well-known charity.

WTF has AVfM actually achieved for men, apart from lining Paul’s pockets and making the Honey Badgers feel like special snowflakes (apart from if any of them step out of line, then excommunication like Woolly Bumblebee)?

Skye
10 years ago

Verux, since you’re here. I posted this in the previous thread:

Um…even if someone believed the WRC was bigoted/one sided/whatever, how would donations that only pay for a website offer “the possibility of real solutions”? What solutions would those be, pray tell? No money is going to be used for shelters or hotel rooms or therapists or counseling or even a DV phone line. How does anyone fall for this?

You claim Paul Elam is trying to help all DV victims. Please enlighten us as to what help is being provided

thebewilderness
thebewilderness
10 years ago

The money he cheats people out of goes to nobody but him. You can look it up. He brags about it on his web site.

grumpyoldnurse
grumpyoldnurse
10 years ago

@ Verux – didn’t notice the “Resources for Men” links at the right side of the page, did you? How about the “Resources for All” links? Only one of them is directed exclusively at women. Want to tell us all again how us nasty feminists are “encouraging violence against men and women but attacking them people who try to help them”?

Falconer
10 years ago

Okay, I checked my 5th Edition Monster Manual and I was wrong — a shambler is created by a lightning strike on an otherwise inoffensive swamp plant. Somehow this makes the plant strangle the life out of all the plants near it, then uproot itself and saunter around looking for more things to eat.

One of the paragraphs is titled The Weed That Walks, which made me think of Swamp Thing when I read it, so that’s where that came from. Sorry.

Probably they could be totally from people dying in a swamp, if the DM wanted them to be. It’s just not in the official book.

In other news: Flumphs and piercers are back in. Flumphs are psychic vampires, slurping metal energy from psionic monsters. The list specifically includes mind flayers (evil, brain eating), aboleths (evil, brain controlling), githyanki (evil, don’t care about brains), and githzerai (neutral, don’t care about brains). The energy the flumph absorbs carries emotions and knowledge with it, which often gives the flumph a sad because they’re beings of such good. The solution, of course, is to point the next group of heavily armed strangers at the monsters that gave them the sad, in the hopes of avoiding future sads.

Piercers are still ineffective. They look like stalactites, and crawl slowly along the ceiling, and drop onto whatever passes below, hoping to impale it and then eat it. If they miss, they’re very little threat because they move so slowly. But if they are successful enough, they grow up into ropers, which are 10 feet tall and have tentacles (called filaments) to snag prey with.

No flail snails, though.

weirwoodtreehugger
10 years ago

What Skye said. How does diverting money to AVFM’s website help DV victims?

Shut up, Woody.
Shut up, Verux.

Falconer
10 years ago

@andiexist:

@Falconer

If she’s already having sex, now is probably a bad time to stick penises in her. Unless, of course, it’s a threesome.

…a threesome with the penis-sticker. Not just a random threesome.

Hu zu bu wuh

I’m sorry, I don’t follow — which of my comments were you responding to?

katz
10 years ago

So an ex-gf and I were talking about D&D items that so LD be stand ins for vulva/vaginas. (Long story about mishearing Boots of Whomping as Boobs of Whomping)

So I joke “portable hole”. She replies “coin purse”. I ask if I can make a deposit. She says “I can’t offer any interest.”

We both about died laughing.

And then there’s the Rod of Lordly Might.

samantha
10 years ago
Reply to  Verux

Sincerely, A Man with Principles and Honor.

Oh, Verux. It is obvious that you have NO understanding or knowledge of the history of feminism. The entire purpose of feminism can be summed up in one, simple sentence. Feminism is the radical notion that women are people. Period.

If women wanted to end men, as your Fearless Leader claims, why did we march and protest during the Vietnam war to end the senseless deaths of men, ours AND the Vietnamese? Why is it that you will find women at the front of every peace movement the modern world has ever seen? Why do YOU think that feminism teaches that masculism, violence and suppression of women is bad for everyone? And why, when there was the possibility of bringing back the draft, did feminist women try to make it apply to us, as well? After all, if the draft can make men fight and die, it is only fair that women take the same risk…even though many of us would choose not to have wars in the first place.

I could go on, but I seriously doubt that anything I say would make a tinker’s damn of difference to you or your profoundly violent and immature master.

Also, a man with principles and honor, as you claim to be, would not align himself with the vicious, woman-hating, lying sack of excrement who steals the name and look of ANY other organization for the sole purpose of diverting attention and, most importantly, money from it to himself.

So I end this with the following: Shut up, Verux, and learn to read some history. And stop being the tool and sheep-like follower of someone who really does not give a rat’s ass about you.

Falconer
10 years ago

Careful with that Flame Tongue, there.

Staff of Power.

Snake Staff.

Wand of Charm Person.

Falconer
10 years ago

It’s 1:12 and, after three weekly sessions, my group is just about set to enter Castle Ravenloft.

Next week everyone’s doing Trunk or Treat. The perfect time to beard an ancient vampire in his lair, and everyone has to spend the evening with their kids. Boo.

Anyway, good night.

katz
10 years ago

And of course Orcus, who can usually be found on his throne, “one bony hand clutching his terrible rod.”

Anarchonist
10 years ago

Gasp! A domestic violence website… with information about MEN being abused? Paul Elam must be stopped! How dare he try to fight domestic violence against men? Wehuntedthemammoth.com, you show him whose boss. Teach him a lesson for trying to fight domestic violence against all genders equally instead of saying only women are victims and (as we all know) men are barbaric savage abusers from their birth.

Stop your sad attempts at sarcasm. It does not become you, seeing that you have no actual understanding of anything involved in this.

I do agree that Paul Elam must be stopped, though, for trying his hardest to sabotage the good name of actual charities, all in the name of his selfish grifting.

Oh my god are you joking? Sarcasm aside, what is so bad about when a Men’s Rights website tries to handle such a terrible crime without sexism and neglecting one group’s suffering?

Yeah, thing is, they’re not actually doing anything about the suffering of anyone. That’s sort of the point. How about stopping that praying at the altar of AVfM for a while and actually read the posts you’re responding to? Think you can do it? Or are you just trying to prove yourself as ignorant and blockheaded as Woody, our resident Paul Elam fanboy troll?

A Voice for Men is about gender equality and combating gender discrimination and abuse on a 50/50 scale whereas your precious feminists encourage violence against men. Paul Elam is simply trying to fulfill white ribbon,’s ultimate goal of ending domestic violence.

Uh-huh. Be honest here: Is it actually about ethics in games journalism?

The projection sure is strong wth this one, it’s a wonder he has not caused some sort of nuclear reaction by now.

If this feminist – joke – of – a – site is too foolish to understand that men can be victims too and the feminist cult’s ideas aren’t the one and only answer, that’s fine, there are people out there with below average I levels (a sad reality).

Below average “I” levels? What the hell is an “I” level? Is it a measure of one’s egotist tendencies? Well then, yeah, I agree, there are many, many, many people with lower “I” levels than anyone associated with the self-serving, rape and abuse apologist hate site AVfM with its violent, misogynistic rhetoric.

Okay, okay, I’m assuming you mean IQ levels, which is hilarious in and of itself. IQ is, by the way, a terrible indicator of many of the various aspects of intelligence, which is a spectrum and not a straight line.

Just don’t insult the movement that is helping men AND women alike or its benevolent leader who is helping out domestic abuse victims.

I’ll just leave a few of these here. No further commentary is necessary.

https://www.wehuntedthemammoth.com/2014/06/28/antifeminist-dv-guru-erin-pizzey-if-you-are-not-in-fear-of-your-life-you-are-not-suffering-from-domestic-violence/

https://www.wehuntedthemammoth.com/2013/03/03/mens-rights-redditor-if-women-want-equal-rights-they-need-to-learn-how-to-take-a-punch/

https://www.wehuntedthemammoth.com/2013/02/21/hitting-women-is-it-a-mans-right/

https://www.wehuntedthemammoth.com/2012/10/14/new-mens-rights-hero-the-cleveland-bus-driver-who-punched-and-choked-a-female-passenger/

Oh, and here’s a piece on what your “benevolent leader” thinks about violence against women:

https://www.wehuntedthemammoth.com/2014/08/07/paul-elam-if-a-woman-five-feet-tall-and-110-pounds-soaking-wet-hits-me-i-am-going-to-hit-her-back/

Bonus content! Here he admits what happens to the money you suckers keep sending his way:

https://www.wehuntedthemammoth.com/2014/07/08/paul-elam-all-your-donations-are-belong-to-me/

Yeah, you’ve really been betting on the right horse here, buddy. Good job.

Before you whine about a man helping victims of a tragic experience, actually do something about domestic abuse instead of insulting, shaming, and neglecting it’s victims AND the people who are actually helping them. You ought to be ashamed of yourself, encouraging violence against men and women but attacking them people who try to help them

Oh my god. You really haven’t got the tiniest smidgen of self-awareness, do you?

Sincerely, A Man with Principles and Honor.

No, clearly you don’t.

Mary
Mary
10 years ago

You ought to be ashamed of yourself, encouraging violence against men and women but attacking them people who try to help them.

What?

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
10 years ago

If Verux wasn’t just a drive-by troll, I’d like to give them a challenge. They claim Elam’s site is dedicated to fighting domestic abuse for both genders equally. Point to one article hosted on whiteribbon.org that focuses on domestic violence against women. That is the entirety of the challenge.

hellkell
hellkell
10 years ago

Verux: so you’re in favor of PaulE’s fraud? So much for honor and principles.

kittehserf - MOD
10 years ago

Woody’s going to be really jealous of this new fanboy getting through.

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
10 years ago

Before you whine about a man helping victims of a tragic experience, actually do something about domestic abuse instead of insulting, shaming, and neglecting it’s victims AND the people who are actually helping them

A) Elam is not actually helping any victims. The website specifically says all donations go to maintaining the website.

B) Elam is insulting, shaming, and neglecting female victims of DV by posting article after article about how women’s shelters are harmful, or domestic violence against women isn’t all that bad, etc. He is attacking the people who are actually helping DV victims of all stripes, the true white ribbon campaign, by hijacking their name with political bullshit.

Before you complain about what you think other people are doing, take a look in the frikken mirror.

binjabreel
10 years ago

Just gonna ignore that ugliness since it seems pretty well handled and focus on the nerdery…

Anyway, I’m gm’ing the 5e campaign with some friends to see how it works and I really hoped i’d been doing a better job of keeping up with the new rules- keep having “crap which edition was that” moments. At least I managed to pull up that random irrelevant esoteric detail.

Misha
Misha
10 years ago

“A Voice for Men is about gender equality and combating gender discrimination and abuse on a 50/50 scale whereas your precious feminists encourage violence against men. Paul Elam is simply trying to fulfill white ribbon,’s ultimate goal of ending domestic violence.”

Uh-huh. Be honest here: Is it actually about ethics in games journalism?

Bwahahahahaha!

Paul Elam is simply trying to fulfill white ribbon,’s ultimate goal of ending domestic violence.

Aw, is he really trying to reach out in solidarity to the aims and values of the White Ribbon Campaign? Extending the ‘figurative hand of friendship’ so that together they may work toward a common goal?

Oh, and please keep sending people to our pages, where they can learn the difference between a fucked up, bigoted campaign to address family violence, and a campaign that relies on solid, proven information which offers the possibility of real solutions.

See, to me Paul Elam’s quote above does not suggest that. It actually suggests that Paul Elam is just another manipulative, angry asshat who senses his original attempt to co-opt the White Ribbon campaign may come under serious legal fire and is now trying to slur the name of the preexisting campaign, for whatever good that may do.

Woody is going to be so, so jealous.

saphy
saphy
10 years ago

Shut up Woody.

Puddleglum
10 years ago

Oh, and please keep sending people to our pages, where they can learn the difference between a fucked up, bigoted campaign to address family violence, and a campaign that relies on solid, proven information which offers the possibility of real solutions.

Well, the average person going to Paulie’s fake site and comparing it to the real one is certainly going to be able to do this, just not in the way Paulie thinks. Which makes this statement all the more delicious.