So I was idly perusing Janet “JudgyBitch” Bloomfield’s Twitter yesterday, and I came across an alarming tweet. It seemed as though Bloomfield had somehow penetrated the 47 levels of security protecting the Feminist HIgh Council to discover incontrovertible evidence of Operation Wicked Succubus. You know, the feminist plan to eliminate all men (except for me).
https://twitter.com/BloomfieldJanet/status/523458962704699393
Her followers were aghast:
And naturally one of them brought up #GamerGate.
There were a few others, but you get the idea.
It never occurred to any of them to, you know, try to find out just who the bald man advocating killing all men was. Or who exactly he was talking to.
So I decided to do some serious investigative journalism to see what I could uncover. I typed out “‘eliminate men as a gender’ security” into a little known internet “search engine” called Google, and boldly clicked on the first result.
This led me to a Tweet with a URL in it. Bravely, I clicked on that URL and found myself looking at a video of a presentation at something called Monitorama PDX 2014 — clearly the code name for one of the Feminist Conspiracy’s conventions.
I looked it up in Google and discovered a web page for the event, which had been held in May. It was described as an “An Open Source Monitoring Conference & Hackathon.”
Ah, clearly a clever Feminist code name.
And then I decided to look up the name of the speaker: James Mickens. Turns out the guy works at Microsoft, one of the companies at the center of the Misandrist Conspiracy. Mickens is also the author of a number of papers, with titles like “Pivot: Fast, Synchronous Mashup Isolation Using Generator Chains” and “Mugshot: Deterministic Capture and Replay for JavaScript Applications.”
Obviously, some high level feminist theorizing.
Then I decided to watch the video. And I was shocked!
Because it wasn’t a speech about killing all men after all. It wasn’t even a feminist speech. No, it seemed instead to be a highly technical talk about internet security issues, illustrated with a lot of silly slides. Like this:
And this:
I must confess that I didn’t get the overwhelming majority of his jokes. But he audience seemed to find these slides, and much of what he said, hilarious. So if you ever need to hire a comedian who can joke about Synchronous Mashup Isolation Using Generator Chains, Mickens is your guy.
So where does the whole “kill all men” thing come from?
Well, I skipped ahead a bit in the video until I found a section in which Mickens talked about the dumb things people do that can undermine even the most sophisticated security setup.
His example: gullible, horny men who are tricked into “friending” hackers on Facebook posing as hot babes — even when there are pretty obvious indications that the hot babes aren’t really hot babes at all.
Things like: saying they graduated from Central University, even though there is no school by that name in the US, or spelling the name of their profession wrong.
These are all good clues, he said, that the hot babe you just friended on facebook was really this guy:
Given that men are regularly duped with simple tricks that play on their horniness and gullibility, Mickens joked, maybe the real goal for people trying to design secure systems should be the elimination of all men.
So that’s where the slide comes from.
And by the way, that whole bit of his killed — not as in “killed all men” but as in “got giant laughs from the mostly male audience.” Expecially the part about killing all men.
If you want to see the whole bit, starting with Mary and ending with “eliminate men as a gender,” it starts at around 20:40 in the video.
Men’s Rights Activists: more gullible than guys who friend Mary from Central University on Facebook.
NOTE TO EXTREMELY LITERAL-MINDED MRAS: That bit about the feminist plot to kill all men (except me) at the start of this post was a joke. Feminists don’t really intend to kill all men (except me).
Or do they?
Because I like knitting socks, I will do black and white intarsia socks with skulls. Knee high. And I will wear an over-the-knee skirt so they can be seen and I can make MRAs puke because I’m over 25 (actually, over 40).
http://www.knitpicks.com/cfPatterns/Pattern_Display.cfm?ID=10264220
Excellent choice!
PICTURES I DEMAND PICTURES
pallygirl, what excellent socks! They make me think of the skull and crossbone tops and mittens Jackie McKinley wore on Time Team – JM being an osteoarchaeologist. 🙂
David, what in Lucifer’s beard is happening to JB? Her temper tantrum and meltdown is pretty disturbing, even by JB standards.
What i’m wondering is; who is sending JB this stuff? She’s too lazy to watch that whole video to screencap it herself. But she’ll take the credit for it.
FWIW I don’t think she’s having an actual meltdown at all. I think she’s realised getting banned from twitter has only increased her status among a group of people who think social cooperation is for beta manginas, and she’s seeing how far she can push it. I also wouldn’t be surprised if she was capable of much worse.
Wouldn’t surprise me, humourlessRadicalFeminist. It’s all about the attention and getting pats on the head from the chucklefucks in the MRM for her.
@humourlessRadicalFeminazi I noticed the one of the original twitter comments that had that screen grab came from Mattie Brice who is one of the games writers that the GGers hate, along with Leigh Alexander. I assume they are watching her and her friends’ twitter feeds and saw the tweet but obviously didn’t bother to figure out the context. Not that they care about the context anyway.
By the way, I have to have AdBlock disabled to see all the stuff that David puts in his posts, so if you have AdBlock running you may not be able to see that the very first picture on this post comes from Mattie Brice’s twitter feed where she retweets the screen grab in question and adds Kill All Men #ThreeWordsWomenWantToHear.
@Chris Wilson.
well, if that’s how they came by the image, that’s just depressing. It’s like other humans are just figments of their imagination, to be used however they like.
My death squad uniform has Dworkin and Solanas quotes embroidered with glitter coated cat fur on the front and a giant silkscreen picture of Lena Dunham on the back. It really scares the shit out of the manospherians. No matter which angle they see me from.
You know, that Anil Dash story furthers something I’ve noticed about this whole gamergate thing recently. They love to talk about how much they don’t condone bullying and abuse and harassment lately. But for all they like to talk about how much they condemn harassment, I’ve yet to see any of them condemn an actual, specific case of harassment (unless you want to count their one convenient scapegoat from outside their movement). As soon as they’re confronted with actual threats made against their opponents they start equivocating. They want to be threatened so they can play the victim or they made it up so they could play the victim or they did something bad too so it’s okay. That one tweet in the article is really apt; it’s like they think they can donate to an anti-bullying charity and buy themselves some sort of bullying credit.
That should have been Kill All Men #ThreeWordsSheWantsToHear which is, of course, a joke (we feminists want to hear Kill All Men rather than I love you). I can’t believe that JB didn’t realize Mattie Brice was riffing on misandry in a humourous way. I think JB did know, but just didn’t care because her rabid followers would eat it up regardless of whether it’s a true representation of how Mattie Brice thinks or not.
And that is what I hate most about the leaders of the MRM, the way they knowingly distort the truth and twist appearances in order to froth up their followers.
Yes, and after we Kill All Men (TM), we will dance wildly around scented candle bonfires like a bunch of slutty penguins. Then we will dye seals a lovely lavender color, but not before we bathe in male tears.
Feminist death squad member here, British division sah! *salutes. My uniform alternates with seasonal public holidays. Right now it has talking pumpkins that shout feminist rhetoric at passersby and cry Male Tears™. In december it will be covered in very special snowflakes.
@David’s links, wow. Wow. Cross-referencing another thread, I am now going to buy the ‘How To Even For Dummies’ handbook. Because right now I don’t even.
I read through some of JB’s tweets and honestly, all I heard was, “I’m saying offensive things! Pay attention to MEEEEEEEE!!!!!”
The only thing I saw that even remotely related to men’s rights was that “women have legal rights men don’t have.”* No links, no sources, no call to action. Just empty words.
The thing is, she’s not necessarily wrong. There are situations in the legal system where women are favored, but writing it on Twitter won’t change anything and it doesn’t cancel out the thousands of other ways women are discriminated against every day.
If you do go have coffee with JB, don’t bother wearing kevlar unless you’re wearing seriously heavy ceramic plate reinforced stuff (Which I think they call level 4 these days?). Arrows shear and tear, so they go straight through most kevlar because instead of deforming on impact like bullets they start parting the fibers.
You’re better off finding a hard suit of material, like, say, plate armor and wearing that. Against bows, which it seems she’s using, that might be your best bet. Google tells me you can acquire a suit of full gothic plate armor for 3000 usd. A bucket of white paint from home depot costs, what, 10-20?
That way, once you do show up wearing your full set of white plate armor, and she starts calling you a white knight and threatening you with your likeness to grouse, you can simply reply:
“Verily, it is so”, given that you are, in fact, wearing a full set of white plate armor.
I still wouldn’t take my chances with a full on archer unless you could find a way to fit some extra chainmail in there under the armor and a gambeson, but at least you’re better off than just wearing strict kevlar.
In other news, yes, yes she did indeed just threaten to murder you with a bow, if somewhat obtusely. Greatest human right’s movement of the 21st century.
literally advocating the murder of their opponents using medieval style equipment.
Sort of says it all, really.
That dumbass would probably end up smacking herself in the face with her own bowstring if she tried, anyway. She often seems like she’s drunkposting, probably not the best idea for her to try operating any sort of equipment.
David, how can we be sure you haven’t been trading sexual favours for good reviews of all those video games you develop? You haven’t specifically come out in denial of it!
(note, I don’t know how to make tweets not embed, so if that embeds, err, feel free to delete or edit or whatever).
I, for one, am shocked that MRAs would jump the gun to insult feminism and thus justify why nobody should trust their judgement. SHOCKED.
Oh, please. You need strength to use a bow, and by JB’s own creed she’s a fragile wimminz and will have to call Paul Elam to do it for her. Of course, knowing how Paul Elam feels about doing things for women… *grabs popcorn*
Shouldn’t they be questioning how, in their minds, a woman can simply say something and have a man arrested. You know, the ‘guilty until proven innocent’ thing?
The way Bloomfield talks, they ought to be wondering why David hasn’t been taken in by the Navy Seals.
Or is she not a woman? The Ladies of AVFM seem to talk as if they weren’t.
JB is so intellectually slipshod. Anyone that careless I would not want for an ally.
That’s because he’s protected by the Feminist Lavender Menace of SJW Approval Seal .
Ah, but you see Toolbox, David is a mangina ally of the Feminist Gynocracy. He is protected from “guilty until innocent”.