So I was idly perusing Janet “JudgyBitch” Bloomfield’s Twitter yesterday, and I came across an alarming tweet. It seemed as though Bloomfield had somehow penetrated the 47 levels of security protecting the Feminist HIgh Council to discover incontrovertible evidence of Operation Wicked Succubus. You know, the feminist plan to eliminate all men (except for me).
https://twitter.com/BloomfieldJanet/status/523458962704699393
Her followers were aghast:
And naturally one of them brought up #GamerGate.
There were a few others, but you get the idea.
It never occurred to any of them to, you know, try to find out just who the bald man advocating killing all men was. Or who exactly he was talking to.
So I decided to do some serious investigative journalism to see what I could uncover. I typed out “‘eliminate men as a gender’ security” into a little known internet “search engine” called Google, and boldly clicked on the first result.
This led me to a Tweet with a URL in it. Bravely, I clicked on that URL and found myself looking at a video of a presentation at something called Monitorama PDX 2014 — clearly the code name for one of the Feminist Conspiracy’s conventions.
I looked it up in Google and discovered a web page for the event, which had been held in May. It was described as an “An Open Source Monitoring Conference & Hackathon.”
Ah, clearly a clever Feminist code name.
And then I decided to look up the name of the speaker: James Mickens. Turns out the guy works at Microsoft, one of the companies at the center of the Misandrist Conspiracy. Mickens is also the author of a number of papers, with titles like “Pivot: Fast, Synchronous Mashup Isolation Using Generator Chains” and “Mugshot: Deterministic Capture and Replay for JavaScript Applications.”
Obviously, some high level feminist theorizing.
Then I decided to watch the video. And I was shocked!
Because it wasn’t a speech about killing all men after all. It wasn’t even a feminist speech. No, it seemed instead to be a highly technical talk about internet security issues, illustrated with a lot of silly slides. Like this:
And this:
I must confess that I didn’t get the overwhelming majority of his jokes. But he audience seemed to find these slides, and much of what he said, hilarious. So if you ever need to hire a comedian who can joke about Synchronous Mashup Isolation Using Generator Chains, Mickens is your guy.
So where does the whole “kill all men” thing come from?
Well, I skipped ahead a bit in the video until I found a section in which Mickens talked about the dumb things people do that can undermine even the most sophisticated security setup.
His example: gullible, horny men who are tricked into “friending” hackers on Facebook posing as hot babes — even when there are pretty obvious indications that the hot babes aren’t really hot babes at all.
Things like: saying they graduated from Central University, even though there is no school by that name in the US, or spelling the name of their profession wrong.
These are all good clues, he said, that the hot babe you just friended on facebook was really this guy:
Given that men are regularly duped with simple tricks that play on their horniness and gullibility, Mickens joked, maybe the real goal for people trying to design secure systems should be the elimination of all men.
So that’s where the slide comes from.
And by the way, that whole bit of his killed — not as in “killed all men” but as in “got giant laughs from the mostly male audience.” Expecially the part about killing all men.
If you want to see the whole bit, starting with Mary and ending with “eliminate men as a gender,” it starts at around 20:40 in the video.
Men’s Rights Activists: more gullible than guys who friend Mary from Central University on Facebook.
NOTE TO EXTREMELY LITERAL-MINDED MRAS: That bit about the feminist plot to kill all men (except me) at the start of this post was a joke. Feminists don’t really intend to kill all men (except me).
Or do they?
Life is short, take your pleasure where you can.
@ kirby
Honestly, I’ve seen paint drying that was more interesting than anything this dude has said so far, and he’s unlikely to get any more interesting as time goes on.
@cassandrakitty:
True, looks like he’s back to just repeating his assertions as if the last couple hours of comments never happened. Ah well. Time to finally start making dinner!
Funny that he claimed not to have a side, to be an outside observer simply troubled by abstract ethical ideals, before proceeding to recite talking points from thunderf00t and dismiss concerns about MRAs because he doesn’t have to care about ethical violations concerning them since he doesn’t sympathize with them.
He may not be a very good troll, as trolls go, but he is dancing as fast as he can.
14!
I’m pretty late to the party here and I’m still catching up, but I saw these lines by SittiKitty-
“Also, I’m not the one scrawling through twitter to find shit to back your shit up. You made the statement, you find the evidence.”
-and I wanted to comment that a Gator actually got me to do this once, out of sheer frustration. I just found a bunch of shit that exposed his ‘movement’ for the garbage it is and linked him back to it. Served him right for not doing the research himself on his own movement.
I think he’s a return troll. A very Steeley troll with bad boundaries.
Gamer gator gated! HA! Excellent.
15
“Funny that he claimed not to have a side, to be an outside observer simply troubled by abstract ethical ideals, before proceeding to recite talking points from thunderf00t and dismiss concerns about MRAs because he doesn’t have to care about ethical violations concerning them since he doesn’t sympathize with them.”
I do care about the ethical violations concerning them, but I do not sympathize with them because they are very unethical persons themselves. It’s a bit like caring about the conditions of a prisoner, but not sympathizing with their heinous crime.
Thunderfoot, as far as I know, hasn’t done anything worse than exposing Sarkeesian and mocking her on his channel and Twitter account. Again, if you know something I don’t, please let me know, and I will change my mind.
Kirby, I’m enjoying watching you poking.
Sadly, I lack the time to do any serious poking myself. Work to do, and all. Plus, I’m still slightly miffed that dearest darling troll thought I was being sarcastic!
I mean, sarcastic? Me?
Never.
You keep calling me troll when all I want is a meaningful discussion. I am more than ready to change my mind if you prove me that thunderfoot actually threatened someone with violence.
I’m not really reading his comments, but I’m sticking around in the hopes that he’ll do something entertaining.
Katz: since you like cats and want to entertained, here’s the Game of Thrones themse sung by a cute little cat: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vEg4SEch27w
Ooh ooh ooh! “GamerGator!” I totally had this idea for one of those black-and-white political-cartoon-type-dealies but I have no drawing ability so I was wondering if anyone wanted to take a crack at it.
Picture a zoom-in of a swamp with a little doll of the gamergater mascot anime girl sitting on the water surface. She’s saying the usual crap like “We just care about corruption in game journalism. We aren’t harassers. #NotYourShield.” Meanwhile, panel by panel, a big alligator rises from the water and opens it’s mouth to consume the 4th wall, and you can see the doll is sitting on top of the gator’s head. The last panel is completely black, except for a final voice bubble along the lines of “We just care about ethics in journalism.”
We no curr, dude. Run along now.
Yeah, there is a certain Boston Baby feel here.
“Yeah, there is a certain Boston Baby feel here.”
I’m not an American. English isn’t even my first language.
LOL at trollboy wanting a meaningful discussion. Pull the other one, kid.
*fidget fidget*
*fidget fidget*
Grah! Dammit Chockanga, it’s not like I want to argue with you or anything!
@Chockanga:
The argument is about your standards for ethics and how daft they are, not about if your bizarre standards are being met. Your mind isn’t changing at all if you just use your system to come to a different conclusion.
Words mean things. You have given no indication that you want anything but your ego stroked and a “win” in a “debate.” You demonstrate no capacity for rational thinking and no ability to maintain a single argument. You have stated no clear thesis – this permits you to shift the goalposts whenever you like, and don’t think that anyone is unclear on your motivations for this.
Words mean things, and your words have conveyed nothing remotely like a desire for meaningful discussion.
16!
Is there some troll-by-the-numbers book out there? Now he’s claiming English isn’t his first language. Uh-huh. Troll, you English too good for any of us to buy that one.
Instead of calling me a troll you could actually reply to my comments for a change.
I am replying, I’m calling you a troll. Too bad it’s not the response you feel you deserve.
Yep.
Finished failing school yet?