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Dirty laundry! Was John Hembling booted from A Voice for Men for criticizing Janet Bloomfield and Stefan Molyneux?

Longtime observers of A Voice for Men have been wondering for some time why John “The Other” Hembling has vanished from that site. Hembling, once the site’s Editor in Chief and number two figure, was not at AVFM’s much ballyhooed conference this summer, and his name has mysteriously vanished from the masthead. AVFM has not, to the best of my knowledge, ever offered a public explanation for the falling-out with Hembling.

Now, after months of silence on the topic, Hembling is telling his side of the story.

In a video posted yesterday — and embedded at the top of this post —  Hembling claims he was tossed overboard from the good ship AVFM because he was publicly critical of some of AVFM’s staffers and allies – in particular Janet “JudgyBitch” Bloomfield, AVFM’s truth-challenged “social media director,” and Stefan Molyneux, long-winded YouTube “philosopher”and leader of the Cult of Stefan Molyneux.

Hembling starts off the video by challenging the “rumor” that he was kicked out of AVFM because he was planning on showing up to the group’s conference with a giant inflatable penis, a reference to Community Organized Compassion and Kindness — COCK – a group that he started with his girlfriend Diana Davison and which seems to count only the two of them as members. I have no idea if this is a real rumor, a joke, or something he actually was planning. I mean, this is a guy who runs a “human rights” group called COCK. In any case, he insists in the video that he had no such plans.

The real reasons he was “disinvited” from the conference and from AVFM itself? According to Hembling, it’s largely because, he hasn’t been shy about criticizing other AVFMers, as well as various articles on the site, including one from a trans man that Hembling thought was “bullshit,” and published only because AVFM was trying too hard to be inclusive.

But apparently his biggest crime in the eyes of Elam and other AVFMers was his criticism of AVFM PR maven Janet Bloomfield – not for being a liar with a propensity for calling her opponents “whores,” but for being … a stay-at-home mom.

When Hembling joined AVFM, he notes, the site was harshly critical of traditionalist conservatives, seeing the traditional roles of men as providers and women as stay-at-home wives and mothers as offering little more than “slavery” for men.

Indeed, Hembling quotes from one 2011 post by AVFM founder and big kahuna Paul Elam warning of the danger posed to men by, in Elam’s words

‘traditional” woman’… offering fellatio in exchange for indentured servitude, and reveling in her ‘traditional power,’ as a woman. … Traditionalism is the driving force behind male slavery. It is the psychological machine that socializes men into becoming fodder and into becoming lapdogs disguised as guard dogs.

But now, Hembling complains, AVFM has not only abandoned its disdain for traditionalist women, but has also appointed a traditionalist woman – Bloomfield – to serve as its PR representative. (Though Hembling doesn’t mention is, AVFM also brought traditionalist conservative Suzanne Venker to speak at its conference.) And when Hembling brought up this seeming contradiction while he was at AVFM, he says, his “relatively mild critiques” were seen as “blasphemy.”

“What happened, Paul,” Hembling asks. “Did your brains fall out?”

As Hembling sees it, the “final nail in my coffin at AVFM” was his criticism of Molyneux, a woman-hating libertarian “philosopher” with a cult following (literally) on YouTube who was one of the more memorable speakers at AVFM’s conference. (I highlighted some of the horrible things he said in that speech in a Misogyny Theater video here.) Hembling doesn’t specify what exactly he criticized Molyneux for, but insists that it was mild criticism compared to what the “philosopher” hears from others online.

Hembling adds that he also called MRA elder Warren Farrell “Professor Fuzzy Face. I think that might have ruffled some feathers too.”

So are these the real reasons Hembling was exiled from AVFM? Isn’t it possible that he was actually shitcanned because he’s a loose cannon and compulsive liar that no legitimate organization would want to have anything to do with?

He is, of course, all of those things, and if we were dealing with any entity other than AVFM I would assume this was the true explanation. But the plain fact is that AVFM is overflowing with loose cannons and compulsive liars, from the man at the top of the heap down to the footsoldiers in its Twitter army.

And, as hard as it might be to believe anything that someone as habitually truth-challenged as Hembling has to say, his explanation of his fall from grace is completely plausible. Elam is an egotist and an opportunist, and he’s not someone who likes being second-guessed by his followers. To have the ostensible number two at AVFM calling him out publicly for his hypocrisy and poor judgement? Well, I can’t imagine he was terribly happy about that.

Will Elam respond to this video with an “explanation” of his own? I can only hope so.

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maistrechat
10 years ago

@freemage

What’s bizarre to me is that he keeps totally dismissing Clarissa. It’s the first show I think about when that era comes up, and I never watched Sabrina. It’s probably just the circles I run in, but I rarely hear people talk about Ren & Stimpy anymore.

He does this weird “Clarissa doesn’t matter because it’s mostly women writing about it” thing too.

The way he treats race is just as bad, too. Totally reinforces the “white is default idea” (A character should only be nonwhite if there’s an explicit reason for them to be so!)

Also I hated Ren & Stimpy then and I still can’t stand it.

That guy is just unpleasant, period.

maistrechat
10 years ago

Best comment on that article:

As for diversity, the guys dead right.
I mean, why DOES an Indian person have to be Indian? I mean its weird right.
And woman, why DO they have to be female? They are kinda forcing it no?
I’ll go ask my wife why she choose to be a woman.

Also, its kinda obviously you should never write a character unless your exactly like that character. So no females unless your female, no Indians unless your Indian, and no dogs unless your a dog.

maistrechat
10 years ago

Also by the guy from that interview:

This absolutely horrifying book:

http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/18366319-rag-doll

I apologize for inflicting it on y’all

ceebarks
10 years ago

I think what they want is a relationship with women in which they have all the power and the woman has none; the form this takes doesn’t matter that much to them.

They are right that a “traditional” marriage in this day and age is *not* generally that relation: even a lowly housewife may get fed up and leave, and be legally entitled to take her share of the family’s assets with her. (conversely, if she fails to tickle the boner, the husband also can’t just pitch her out with nothing but the shirt on her back!)

Scenario A fills them with that kind of sputtering rage MRAs are so famous for, and a lot of them are so insecure they think Scenario B never happens (or at least only ever happens for damned good cause), therefore, traditional marriage should mean being-owned-and-liking-it; it’s only hypergamy or the feminine imperative or whatever that causes/d women to resist this scheme.

fruitloopsie
fruitloopsie
10 years ago

WWTH
Women is misandry

Leela
Sums up how awful it is to have no life but ruin people’s lives.

Shut up woody

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
10 years ago

@maistrechat

OMG. I love the blurb. “This guy is SO COMPLICATED, because he has a madonna/whore attitude toward women, and wants to sexually humiliate women he hates.” That’s … not a complex character, blurb-writer. That’s bog-standard.

hellkell
hellkell
10 years ago

Poor Klickstein. Born on the third base of life and thinks he’s really on first. What a fucknut.

hellkell
hellkell
10 years ago

His book sounds like a pile of hot garbage/him getting his issues all over the place.

Fibinachi
10 years ago

Why does someone who’s making something about a black person need to be black? Why does someone making a show about an Indian person need to be Indian? Why does someone making a show about women need to be a woman? If you’re making something about an alien, you don’t need to be an alien to do it. That’s ultimately what it comes down to: They will connect with the character no matter what.

But the people who are making it are not. Look, I love the Bob’s Burgers people, I just don’t understand why they feel that they need to do that. Why not have it be Indian creators doing it, and have it more about the Indian culture and Indian-American culture?

…. Errr, what?

leftwingfox
10 years ago

AVFM: Stop being horrible to our terrible people.

JtO: Stop being inconsistently terrible in your policies when hiring horrible people.

Us: http://replygif.net/1243

leftwingfox
10 years ago
freemage
freemage
10 years ago

Fibinachi: Yeah, the fact that he can’t even be consistent in being awful really puts the icing on that particular turd-cake.

And yes, it was the way he tries to explain that nostalgia for white Peters (sorry, I couldn’t help myself) is totes awesome and heartwarming, but nostalgia for a girly show with a girl star thatis still talked about by girls (and women!) is just branding because the lead actress was actually talented enough to have a career after that one program.

weirwoodtreehugger
10 years ago

Most of the enthusiasm for Nickelodeon shows came from the girls. At least where I’m from. Clarissa is relevant because a huge chunk of the network’s fanbase, if not the majority were girls and we all loved that show. I watched some episodes recently and it holds up just as well as Ren and Stimpy or Pete and Pete. Alex Mack was another big show that was quite good.

M. the Social Justice Ranger
M. the Social Justice Ranger
10 years ago

@freemage

I… Holy SHIT.

And some assnugget in the comments called another commenter a “Social just warrior” for calling out the white-supremacist rape-fantasiser for being a white-supremacist rape-fantasiser (and in much more restrained words than what I’m using). It’s official, “SJW” doesn’t mean anything at all anymore.

… Well, not that it ever did, but y’know.

M. the Social Justice Ranger
M. the Social Justice Ranger
10 years ago

*Justice, not just. D’oh.

katz
10 years ago

The infighting of groups you don’t like is such an irresistible guilty pleasure.

contrapangloss
10 years ago

Dear dude who is protagonist in silly book:

If you find a comatose young woman in an alleyway, call a blooming ambulance, you ignoramus!

Also, you do not get a meeting minimum standards as a human cookie.

Thank you, Mr. TotallyNotComplexNiceGuyWithBehaviorProblemsTM.

Puddleglum
10 years ago

That nickelodeon article was… ugh. I mean, he circles around an important issue (are minorities brought into shows to be more inclusive, or to just meet a visual diversity quota), but his reasons for questioning it are dumb.

Not that I ever watched any of these shows. Nickelodeon was never a ‘thing’ where I grew up. The only show I’d heard of that he mentioned was Ren & Stimpy, which I know because it had a song on MuchMusic many moons ago. Like, thousands of moons ago.

@leftwingfox: that tumblr was perfect!

Puddleglum
10 years ago

I have to admit, the thought of Woody’s response to this post makes me smile. Am I a bad person?

Kate
10 years ago

Is it “traditional” for a woman to swear so much? Standing up to one’s own side is more difficult than attacking the opposite views, so, even though I’m not familiar with this man, I respect that he had the guts to do it.

hellkell
hellkell
10 years ago

Oh, no! Women fucking swearing! END TIMES.

JtO is totally noted for his guts. Yep.

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
10 years ago

Indeed. That brave, brave man, radically standing up for the status quo in a world that totally supports and subsidizes the status quo.

Puddleglum
10 years ago

so, even though I’m not familiar with this man, I respect that he had the guts to do it.

Hahahahaha.

Puddleglum
10 years ago

@Leela, that article made me feel equally sad and enraged. Thanks for sharing it.

Puddleglum
10 years ago

Is it “traditional” for a woman to swear so much?

No fucking idea.