An open thread for personal stuff, continuing from here.
As usual for these threads: no trolls, no MRAs, no I’m-not-really-an-MRA-buts, don’t be mean.
Categories
We Hunted The MammothBucking the Backlash
We Hunted The Mammoth
Good luck POM and welcome back Marci!
So, I just confessed that I used to have an eating disorder to my mom tonight. I actually thought she knew but she didn’t. We had a few drinks so she cried a little. I felt bad. Maybe I shouldn’t have told her at all, but I was trying to get her to understand why I’m not super confident and that being just okay with myself is an accomplishment. I feel bad that I made her feel bad because it’s not her fault. I just have a shitty brain.
Did she feel bad in the sense of not having known, or sorry for you having it?
I think it’s important to watch those situations where you were the one who suffered and had (or have) a problem, and you nevertheless find yourself comforting someone else. It’s not automatically illegit, but it’s a weird dynamic that merits scrutiny.
She felt bad that she didn’t notice and didn’t help me. She wants me to be happy and felt bad that she couldn’t make me be so. It’s not her fault I’m a good liar though. I really am very good at hiding my feelings and behavior. People with EDs are usually very, very deceptive.
I don’t feel so bad about the ED now because I’ve been OKish for years. For her it was a surprise. Add in the drinks and it’s not a surprise she was emotional compared to me.
Good luck POM! Surgery can be scary.
Just had to share – today’s nanowrimo pep talk was from Tamora Pierce!!!! Guess I should try and catch up on my novel now…
WWTH, I guess it’s the way things go when one has an illness/disorder where deception is part of the package. Does it make sense to say I’m relieved that your mum was unhappy at not knowing/being able to help, rather than being upset/annoyed that you told her? She had the reaction of someone who cares, and yeah, because you care, you’re going to be upset at doing that.
Got to love this: a Liberal staffer has had to quit the party after they found out he used to be in a Neo-Nazi group.
Says it all, really.
PoM, sending all the support and hugs if you want them, hope you’re doing ok. And sorry to hear about the cost, I often forget how difficult it must be for folks outside of the UK to access affordable healthcare. Very grateful for the NHS.
Arty question! Which d’you think works better – colour or black and white?
http://i.imgur.com/DjLFGRa.png
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http://i.imgur.com/Pktl1xP.png
I like the color one. You guys are having fun!
Colour. 🙂
Good luck with the surgery, POM. When I have local sedation, I get a benzo to basically make me not care. I like not caring when people are doing surgery on me with a local, in particular the dentist or periodontist.
WWTH: good luck with the ongoing relationship with your mother over this. And congrats on getting better, eating disorders are notoriously difficult to work through.
I used to lie to my parents throughout my childhood and teenage years about my depression. Not that I knew it was depression, and maybe it wasn’t to start with. I just knew that there were periods where I felt really unhappy for no reason, and couldn’t stop crying.
It was kinda in self-defense though. If I told the truth, as I did at first, they assumed I /was/ lying to cover up bullying or something from them and kept on at me about it.
So I started saying I was reading a sad bit in a book, or something on tv or in a film had got me down, so all I got was a short talk about not letting fictional events upset me too much.
Thanks, katz, pallygirl!
I wasn’t sure about the colour one. The grass looks so dry and I’m not wild about the way the background’s faded out in the original pic, and trying to fix it didn’t work. Summer at Home is a lot greener than that. We see enough grass that looks like toast here.
We are having fun. Just being on a picnic with Mr K pretty much guarantees there’ll be fun of some sort. Probably several sorts. 😉
#feministprincessbride
That is all 🙂
My latest “work of art”
http://wheresthecatat.tumblr.com/post/102695177633
Your works of art are fantastic. 😀
Kim, that’s marvellous!
Poor Cleopatra, no help from the kitty.
I’ve been on a bit of a Captain Hook kick for the last few days – purely the Jason Isaacs version, beware of imitations – and reading a fair bit of fanfic, which I’ve rarely if ever done before. Never read Peter Pan or seen any of the films, because the idea of that brat killing the pirate captain turned my stomach since my primary school days.
So, with this little diversion going on, Someone decided to join in … and I can only say that this is way, way more fun.
That looks really cool. Honestly, velvet improves any outfit.
Thank you!
Hook’s wardrobe in that film was just magnificent. Mind you it’s hard to go wrong with something based on 1680s – 1690s fashion.
I had pre-op today. I thought I’d been told that I would be speaking to the anesthesiologist, but I reckon I misunderstood something because I actually spoke with a series of nurses. I don’t think any of them were anesthetists. I did tell them about the SVT and one of them did an EKG (which can’t have been hideously abnormal because they let me leave). I also told them about the abnormally extreme reaction I had to sedation last time, and that was noted.
Apparently I will have my choice of how much sedation I want. They are going to do a nerve block, and I can be anything from totally awake to totally out depending on what I prefer. That is so weird and I never imagined such a thing.
Thanks to everyone for the good wishes! Surgery is on Friday. Still nervous but maybe less so based on this new info.
Best wishes, Policy of Madness!
Good luck!
Hope it all goes well, PoM!
Good luck! Please check in with us when you can, we’ll all be positive thoughts for you.