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The Fart Gap: Why Red Pillers think that women should never fart — or fart-shame their flatulent men

Owner of a lonely fart
Owner of a lonely fart

Ladies, we need to talk. About farting.

It has recently come to my attention that women sometimes fart. And that some of you even do it in the presence of men – including the men whom you allegedly love.

This is a gigantic no-no, a sign of disrespect for your man’s manliness. Also, never criticize his farting, because that too is a sign of disrespect for his manliness.

At least according to the douchebags of the Manosphere and the women who love them, farts and all.

In a brief post the other day titled She’s saving her farts for you, the Christian Red Pill blogger Dalrock let rip at a writer on a woman’s site for suggesting that “a man who lets you fart around him” is better marriage material than “a man who is grossed out by female functions.” Men in the latter category are ok only for a bang.

Dalrock sniffed:

Sure all of those other men banged her when she was younger and hotter, but you get something special.

Apparently hot, alpha-cock-carouseling women in their twenties never fart, saving all their flatulence for the betas they later rope into marriage after they hit the wall. Alpha fucks, beta … gets farted on.

In the comments, many of Dalrock’s readers agreed wholefartedly with his analysis.

“Anyone still doubt my assertions of Open Hypergamy now” asked Rollo Tomassi, the blogger at The Rational Male.

Earl let the farty ladies know that he was on to them:

The general thought process behind these comparisons is:

 Marry: A man already comfortable in his emasculation.

 Bang: A man who either isn’t or decided not to be emasculated.

 I hate how marriage has become basically a one way ticket to emasculation in this day and age.

TFH — also known as The Fifth Horseman, and considered one of the leading intellectual lights of the Men’s Rights movement – attempted to put the Fart Question in historical context:

‘Feminism’, far from helping women, has instead exposed the full extent of female shortcomings (moral, mental, intellectual, spiritual, economic, civic) far more visibly than could ever happen before ‘feminism’.

Traditional customs taught women that if they farted openly, their chances of receiving a provider would go down. This allowed society to package women into something that men thought was unrealistically noble. ‘Feminism’ has exposed the truth.

And a stinky truth it is. No wonder TFH is looking forward with such eagerness to virtual sex and the ultimate replacement of farty human ladies with virtual ones, as he predicted in his Misandry Bubble manifesto.

Casey instructed any women reading to

Ignore the advice of other women, particularly feminists.

Marry young, marry pretty, give your husband your youth; not your flatulence. 

The Brass Cat, meanwhile, recommended that men “of the gassy persuasion” use their farts as a way to show what totally dominant alpha dogs they are. This, he explained, was Fart Game.

Think of your fart as a primitive territorial marker; everything it touches is yours. When you feel the pressure building up, walk into the kitchen where your wife is (best be makin’ me a sammich!), deliver your payload, and walk away (to a safe distance) while laughing. And while you’re laughing she’ll discover what you just did. She’ll react like “Oh gross, I can’t believe you did that! That’s awful!” You should maintain the laughing and own it–no apology–and say something like “Oh man that was a good one!”

If you did it right she should walk over to you, say something like “You drive me crazy!” then kiss you.

Apparently Fart Game is an actual thing. Because, a few days after reading Dalrock’s thoughts on farting, I discovered a similar discussion in the Red Pill Women subreddit – an online hangout for mostly traditionalist women who want to snag themselves an alpha.

One aspiring Red Pill Woman posted a complaint – now removed by the mods – about her husband’s habit of farting in her presence, which she sees as disgusting and he apparently sees as hilarious.

Well, the farted-upon wife got an earful from the other gals there, who made very clear that it was her job as a Red Pill wife to learn to love her husband’s flatulence – and not be a “horrible, prissy bitch” about it, as one heavily upvoted comment put it.

Moggymojo noted that

I have never willingly farted in front of my partner (I leave the room), though occassionally one sneaks out (where upon I will apologise).

But her husband? He’s a farter, and she’s decided to roll with it. And she thinks that the fart complainer needs to do the same:

I don’t shame him or criticise him for farting …

You might prefer a different method but you have a partner who is being playful – if you respond to that angrily, in disgust etc then you will be rebuffing not only the farting but other light hearted playfulness, openess and ease which should be part of a LTR.

Fart shaming is misandry!

“A man who has a woman who laughs appreciatively at his farts is a happy man,” declared homo_homini_lupus, adding, in a followup comment directed at the fart complainer, that

the more a man is allowed to be a man in his home the happier he will be. If you don’t appreciate his humor you are communicating maternal lack of approval and signalling lack of love. It won’t kill you …

you , however, should not engage in fart and toilet humor, just laugh when he does.

So the Red Pill consensus is clear: Women, you should never fart. Nor should you ever criticize your husband’s farting, because that’s bitchy and emasculating and, well, just not ladylike.

To that I can only say

EdoFart4

EQUAL FARTS FOR ALL!

H/T — The Blue Pill

161 Comments
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Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
10 years ago

Someone could write a whole dissertation on the immaturity double standard. Men can fart and belch and scratch freely, like toddlers, with no social consequences, but when a woman does it, it’s the most disgusting thing ever. Women are expected to transcend crudeness and maintain control over their biological processes. How does this fit in with the manosphere narrative that women are children and men are grownups?

Also, I love how they demand that women emit naught but tiny puffs of gossamer spun sugar, borne aloft into the firmament on the wings of seraphim, and then they turn around and complain how women are up on pedestals.

Bina
Bina
10 years ago

On another note, this reminds me of Melissa Gorga’s memoir, Love, Italian Style. In addition to hand waving things like her husband occasionally “taking her” after she said, “No,” because “it’s important for Joe that we connect physically,” she also reveals that, if she has to poop, she doesn’t use the house bathroom. She goes down the street to use Burger King’s. http://jezebel.com/real-housewife-melissa-gorgas-new-book-advocates-mar-1371722729

I remember that. Marital rape is “love”, but a woman pooping in her own home is MISANDRY! Because her lawfully wedded encumbrance might smell it and be too grossed out to rape her tonight. That argument has more loops than a Six Flags rollercoaster.

Bina
Bina
10 years ago

Also, I love how they demand that women emit naught but tiny puffs of gossamer spun sugar, borne aloft into the firmament on the wings of seraphim, and then they turn around and complain how women are up on pedestals.

I feel like writing a new fairytale for them. I think I’ll call it “The Princess and the Poo”.

Bina
Bina
10 years ago
proxieme
proxieme
10 years ago

My 2-year-old actually claims other people’s farts and burps.

“I did dat! I fahted!”

It’s good to know that the misandry is flowing through to the next generation.

marinerachel
10 years ago

I love Matt Inman so much.

marinerachel
10 years ago

Hi analysis of farts vs. sneezes made me chortle:

http://theoatmeal.com/comics/sneeze_vs_toot

Michelle C Young
10 years ago

My brother is an airplane mechanic, and he says that farting is part of the culture at his workplace. He is very proud of his extra-stinky farts, and bragged about how he cleared the cockpit, by letting a quiet one rip, then asking, “Do you smell popcorn?”

However, when he’s at home, he uses the bathroom for its intended purpose, which includes saving your family from nasal distress.

See? Even a manly man, fart-contest winner can be polite about it at home, without bottling it all up and being uncomfortable.

He still makes fart jokes at home, but nobody minds, because 1) they are generally funny, and 2) he doesn’t give a demonstration.

sparky
sparky
10 years ago

…And they’re writing about farts, and describing “fart game.”…

Dude, that’s not “game.” That’s normal human bodily function. Everybody does it. Literally, everybody. That’s not “alpha.” That’s being a human being with normal bodily functions.

My dog actually tries to blame his farts on me. Whenever he lets one rip, he jumps up, looks at his backside in dismay, then gives me this really dirty look, like “What did you do?”

BlueTuesday
BlueTuesday
10 years ago

Farts?

What? Are they like eight or something?

No wait, my 8-year is waaaay more mature.

grumpyoldnurse
grumpyoldnurse
10 years ago

LOL, sparky, at your dog trying to blame you!

Fnoicby
Fnoicby
10 years ago

If you did it right she should walk over to you, say something like “You drive me crazy!” then kiss you.

It’s things like this that make me think these men have had very little interactions with actual women in their lifetimes. What active imaginations they have.

Bina
Bina
10 years ago

“Matt, I want a divorce!” — said no farted-upon woman, ever.

baroncognito
10 years ago

A full three halves of the women I’ve farted on have immediately responded with “Matt, I want a divorce.”

And my name is Michael.

baroncognito
10 years ago

So, when my friends are driving around in a geo metro, roll all the windows up, and fart, are they fart gaming everyone in the car? Is that an attempt to get sex?

alaisvex
alaisvex
10 years ago

I don’t think that fart gaming is about getting sex. I think that it’s about establishing dominance through (what they hope will be) humiliation. Actually, that’s really what all Game is about, with sex coming as a by-product.

kittehserf - MOD
10 years ago

A full three halves of the women I’ve farted on have immediately responded with “Matt, I want a divorce.”

And my name is Michael.

LOL!

grumpyoldnurse
grumpyoldnurse
10 years ago

Misandry update, everyone! I am cooking curried lentils for dinner tonight! Mwhahahahahahahahahahahaha!

(surely this will get me back in the good graces of the Feminist High Council? ALL HAIL BOOTSY!)

kittehserf - MOD
10 years ago

Curried lentils?

RUN FOR YOUR LIVES

grumpyoldnurse
grumpyoldnurse
10 years ago

Oops. My nine year old son saw the picture of the guys farting. Maybe I better take lentils off the menu for the next decade or so…

alaisvex
alaisvex
10 years ago

Curried lentils?

GO OUT IN PUBLIC AROUND ALL THE ALPHAS!

genedaniell3
genedaniell3
10 years ago

Traditional:
Where e’er thou be,
let thy wind blow free.

In church or chapel,
let it rattle!

In my mother’s version it was the epitaph on a tombstone and the second couplet was:
For holding on to one
Was the death of me.

brooked
brooked
10 years ago

you, however, should not engage in fart and toilet humor, just laugh when he does.

I’m surprised a TeRPer lady felt the need to write this out, everyone know only men are allowed to make jokes and women should always laugh at all of them to maximize male ego massaging.

baroncognito
10 years ago

It’s not to massage the ego; the fear is that if you don’t laugh, he’s going to try to explain the joke.