Men’s Rights Activists love to chastise feminists for allegedly dealing mostly with “first world problems,” trivial annoyances that pale in comparison to the REAL issues faced by women (and men) in the rest of the world. So it’s a good thing that MRAs only get themselves worked up about life and death issues.
Like COOKIE MISANDRY.
Let’s let Men’s Rights Redditor kizzan explain this insidious danger to modern man:
As Martin Luther King might have said, “A cookie delayed is a cookie denied.”
Well, he might not have put it that way exactly. But having to wait literally seconds for a cookie is pretty much the definition of justice denied.
In any case, as the 80 upvotes and 60 comments to his post suggest, Kizzan is not the only one outraged by this blatant oppression of men.
![p3ngwin 20 points 1 day ago chivalry when they like it, sexism when they don't. and yes, it's often called "benevolent sexism" by assholes, as if that justifies it. permalink save give gold [–]Revoran 8 points 1 day ago "Women and children first" as the men stay behind on the boat to drown. "Benevolent" sexism... not so benevolent if you're a man who gets the short stick.](https://i0.wp.com/www.wehuntedthemammoth.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/09/titanic.png?resize=508%2C202&ssl=1)
Clearly waiting a few seconds for a cookie is equivalent to giving up a seat in a lifeboat on the Titanic so that some dumb lady can live.
ParanoidAgnostic blamed feminism and its “ladies first” agenda.
Exactly. Who can forget Mary Woolstonecraft’s 1792 manifesto “A Vindication of the Rights of Woman to Cookies Right Now Give Me the Goddamn Cookie You Filthy Man?”
Our old friend GenderNeutralLanguag [sic] suggested that these insidious misandrists be confronted for their terrible hypocrisy:
Mr. GenderNeutralLanguag [sic] must be fun at parties.
Khal534, meanwhile, reported on some important human rights activism he did on this very issue and that totally happened just like this uh huh:
Not everyone agreed that cookie misandry was the most important issue of all time.
Happily this cookie misandry denier was rightly chastised with downvotes for his manginaism.
Below, see a famous chick singer demanding that men and boys wait for cookies. At least that’s what I assume she’s singing about, from the song title. I really have no idea what the hell she’s saying.
NOTE: In case any MRAs think that I agree in any way with this clearly misandrist cookies-for-ladies-a-few-seconds-before-cookies-for-men agenda, let me just say that I firmly believe that cookies should be given to me first. And if there are any left the ladies can fight for them. Seems fair to me. In any case, that’s my Cookie Policy, and by accessing this website you have agreed to it.
H/T — r/againstmensrights
@kim:
Nah, I’m in the US. MA if anybody’s curious. The australian thing just happened to top the google search list when I was looking for the density of timber, and I thought it was amusing.
@Policy of Madness
Yay ^.^ Also, I love new recipes. Also also I just told my partner about these, and his jaw dropped. You made his day just like ‘A Wild Old Lady’ made mine, and I say thankya (been reading way too much Dark Tower, sorry).
@ryeash
If you’re happy, and/or your partner is happy, then I’m happy. 😀
I asked for molasses once and Doad brought home carob molasses. What a delicious mistake.
Cookies are a sometimes-food, but pancakes are an every-day-you-want-to-make-them food.
@Policy of Madness
Aw :-). Well, we certainly appreciate it. I’m going to try to translate it into Swedish pancakes, because that’s his favorite and I was too broke to get him a bday present :- I made him Swedish pancakes and a peanut butter cup cheesecake on his bday, but the Swedish pancakes were my first try at a recipe from the internet, and the cheesecake was also for my brother (they have close birthdays). The pancakes turned out dry, so I had to make some adjustments. The cheesecake, however, turned out to be one of the best I’ve made. I was actually able to make a peanut butter cheesecake creamy and melty instead of stiff and sticky.
If anyone wants a good cheesecake recipe that can be adjusted for any conceivable flavor, let me know.
@ ryeash
Alas, for me, cheesecake is The Dessert Which Shall Not Be Named. However, I would appreciate any recipe which uses whole lemons (including zest). Every year I wind up with excess lemons.
@Policy of Madness
I’m not sure how you feel about lemon bars, but they’re one of my favorites when they’re done well. My mother also loves them, so I’ve been meaning to try them out for awhile. Once I get things just right, I’ll send the recipe your way 🙂
Also, what did cheesecake do to you?? Do I need to kick its ass?
Mm, thanks for the recipe, Policy of Madness! I’m going to try it out.
There’s a local brunch place that serves gingerbread pancakes with lemon syrup. It’s a rapturous combination.
@ryeash
If you can attest to your lemon bar recipe, I would like to have it.
LOL it did nothing to me except make me nauseated 100% of the time I have tried it. I don’t know what disagrees with me, but it seems innate to TDSSNBN. All of them do it, without exception. I have no explanation.
:: raises hand ::
I would also like ryeash’s lemon bar recipe. My new favorite desert.
By about 10 years, yup. These dudes are all in their Terrible Twos. And they’re STILL not potty trained either, by the sounds of things.
I will most certainly pass it along once I perfect it. That’s officially my next project.
Sorry folks, my recipe doesn’t exactly exist quite yet. I need to bake them again and figure out what I can do better. Last time I baked them was a friend’s recipe, and I was helping her with Christmas stuff. So it was pretty much “whip this together, throw it in, next!”
@ryeash
Hey, I understand. When it’s perfected, do pass it along!
RE: desserts
Hubby and I have a vegan chocolate wedding cake that is really easy and DELICIOUS, if anyone wants that!
RE: kirbywarp
Nah, I’m in the US. MA if anybody’s curious.
Welp, if you’re in the Boston area, I might be at MICE this weekend! I already hope to meet up with emilygoddess, it’d be awesome to meet you too!
@Policy of Madness
Will do!
Vegan chocolate cake? I need to know this. LBT, please, please, please tell us this magic!
I usually make cookies following the chocolate chip bag instructions. Only, I sub half of the vanilla for pepermint extract. Peppermint chocolate chip is delicious.
This cookie misandry reminds me of a friend of mine. Whenever people said they couldn’t imagine her being evil, she would say “Oh, I can be evil. I could bake cookies and not give you any.” Clearly she is an evil genius.
Lemon? Suddenly reminded me. Daughter was trying out recipes for the dessert table for her wedding reception. (They had the caterer supply everything else, but sweets were “a selection of slices and biscuits from the CWA cookbook cooked by bride and her sister”. Daughter super pleased with herself because the venue is now offering that as an option itself, though I think the selection would be from the Barossa or the Maggie Beer cookbooks.)
One she tried, but didn’t use because it was too crumbly to cut and transport and still look appetising, was a shortbread slice with lemon butter filling. It was delectable.
Have you made lemon curd/ lemon butter? It’s worth doing a few different batches with different recipes with higher/lower proportions of zest. Some smooth and sweet, some bitey and powerful. They’re all nice. The only problem is the keeping time – it’s only 3 months refrigerated according to all the recipes I’ve seen.
Depending on your preferred cooking styles, making a couple of big jars of Moroccan style preserved lemons can use up a couple of dozen without too much trouble.
Lemon bars? Yes, please. I’ll trade you a chicken teriyaki recipe.
RE: contrapangloss
Your wish is our command! Here is the recipe!
Thank you! I shall be making something chocolate and delicious this weekend. Bwahahaha!
I honestly think I made that post specifically for the last time Mammoths wanted to know the recipe!