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Let's play Richard Dawkins Twitter Meltdown Bingo!

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With Richard Dawkins rapidly accelerating his schedule of Twitter meltdowns recently, it’s clearly time for some RICHARD DAWKINS TWITTER MELTDOWN BINGO!

The rules are simple:

  1. Follow Richard Dawkins on Twitter.
  2. Make sure you’re following the correct Richard Dawkins. This one. While this other Richard Dawkins might seem indistinguishable from the real thing, don’t be fooled! He is merely a stunningly convincing Dawkins impersonator.
  3. As soon as you notice Dawkins — the real Dawkins — saying something, you know, really really Dawkinsish, pop over here to generate your own randomized DAWKINS TWITTER MELTDOWN BINGO card, because, I guarantee you, a meltdown is immi
    nent.
  4. Sit back and wait for the BINGOS to roll in.
  5. Profit?

Oh, and just so you know, I can edit the list used to generate the cards, so if you have any ideas for new squares, or if you think I might have gone a little overboard with the roadkill cannibalism thing, or you think it needs more “dundridges,” post your thoughts in the comments below.

All the items in my DAWKINS TWITTER MELTDOWN BINGO list — even the roadkill cannibalism thing — are based at least loosely on things he’s actually said on Twitter, or in the little essays he’s written defending his behavior on Twitter.

Oh, so you don’t believe me about the roadkill cannibalism thing? Here he is talking about it with his actual mouth.

And that honeypot thing? Here you go.

I told you never to doubt me.

EDIT: For more context about his meltdowns, this piece is a good intro. And thanks for the suggestions! I’ll be adding some more squares about Christina Hoff Sommers and his now-deleted penis Tweet.

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redpoppy
redpoppy
10 years ago

Also, shiba inus are so damn adorable!

kittehserf - MOD
10 years ago

Urgh, that reminds me of the way a friend lets her kids treat their dog. The dog’s a Brittany setter, good natured enough but dumb as a box of rocks, and the kids are allowed to tease and tease him, then shriek at him when he jumps to head-height at them. Don’t think he’s a biter – or wasn’t when I saw them a couple of years ago – but damn, no discipline with the kids and none with the dog, that’s a bad combination.

redpoppy
redpoppy
10 years ago

I’ve heard horror stories of dogs getting put down because a child ended up getting bitten from a lack of parental supervision. Kids and pets must be supervised at all times. They also need to teach the child how to PET the dogs and treat the dogs. Some dogs are very gentle and patient but I can only assume every one of them must have a breaking point. The deaths of these dogs are entirely on the heads of the idiot parents.

gilshalos
10 years ago

I am so glad I inherited enough to buy a house

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

That’s what I’m worried about with the Shiba, that the kid is teaching it to behave in a way that will result in either a child or another dog being mauled, and then the Shiba will be the one blamed rather than the obnoxious child and his irresponsible parents.

kittehserf - MOD
10 years ago

There’s a dog I see being walked past my place quite often – don’t know what breed, maybe a young Chow Chow? Dark brown and MEGA fluffy, but less than knee height. It’s nice to see zir owner, an older guy, is careful when little kids want to pat the dog; he’ll let them, but he has the dog on a short lead and tells the kid how it’s done.

blahlistic (@blahlistic)

As long as I’d remember to take them down before house inspections! Our lease has one of those “nothing on the walls, no pictures, no bluetak, no suction cups, nothing” things in it.

BLECH!
That sucks!
…Poster on the fridge, I suppose…
Small plaque on a shelf…Paint a solid door cupboard?

blahlistic (@blahlistic)

One of my dogs is VERY lovey dovey….too lovey.
As in he will jump up on people and slobber all over them.
I would have trained him not to do that…but…sigh, the neighbors, due to a series of bad circumstances, use my water spigot every day.
And the lady hugs the dog, lets him climb all over her….*facepalm*.
So I just let him run into my knee when he tries that on me, and he’s like “Oh yeah, mom doesn’t let me do that.”
I taught him if he wants petted, he has to sit…but I call him ADHDog for a reason.

katz
10 years ago

Ugh, irresponsible pet owners grind my gears.

kittehserf - MOD
10 years ago

Well, we have lots of kitty fridge magnets, there is that! 😀

kittehserf - MOD
10 years ago

I am shocked, shocked I say.

Mum suggested to Fribs that she could finish what’s in her bowl instead of demanding a refill.

MISCATRY!

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

The first time I met my neighbor’s Malamute he jumped up on me and nearly knocked me over. Dude was so embarrassed, he’d just recently gotten the dog and hadn’t trained him not to do that yet.

I mean, I’m fine with it, I like happy excitable dogs (and I know that my reacting with “aw, cute” and lots of petting is not necessarily a good thing when the owners are trying to train the dog not to do things), but it really is a good idea to train them not to do that with strangers, because someone who’s scared of dogs would be terrified. Neighbor’s dog is much better behaved in public now.

blahlistic (@blahlistic)

North American deer and elk are increasingly succumbing to a related prion based disorder called Chronic Wasting Disease so I’m off that now, too, seeing as I’m already at risk.

And now for something completely unrelated:
Dogs(and by extension, wolves) are immune to prion diseases.
http://www.technologyreview.com/view/424487/prion-disease-secret-of-immunity-revealed/
So…my guess as to why Chronic Wasting Disease is spreading?
It was always there in the population, but those animals with the prion disease would be preferred targets of wolves just as soon as they became slightly impaired. Thus providing a natural cull of infected animals, and limiting the incidence.
Well…We’ve had about 150 years or so since we pretty much eliminated the wolf from the West.
…And people still want them eliminated. The wolf presence negatively impacts hunting and ranching in the immediate present. Even if it’s saving it for the long term

Telling them that not bringing back wolves means the spread of CWD, more importantly the spread of CWD into sheep, goats, and cattle and thus into human commercial food chain…Well, I expect them to not listen until it happens.
Because humans are like that.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

Ethically speaking I prefer to argue that humans have no right to exterminate another species for our own convenience, but on a practical level it’s not a bad idea BUT, do Americans even realize what prion diseases can do to humans once they reach us well enough to be scared into action by the threat of them? I was still in the UK when that mess was unfolding there, so I know how scary those diseases are, but I get the feeling that people here may not really get it on a visceral level.

blahlistic (@blahlistic)

Ethically speaking I prefer to argue that humans have no right to exterminate another species for our own convenience

I agree, but welfare ranchers, renting publicly-owned land for a song, do not.
They have political pull. Hunting is also big business, and people pay big bucks to hunt a big trophy elk with a great big rack of antlers…and Gods forbid the wolves might happen to put that lovely walking rack of antlers on the menu.

I get the feeling that people here may not really get it on a visceral level.

Nope. Not until the feces well and truly hit the fan will they compute. And then there will be no ranching in parts of the west because the grazing has prions in it.

I dunno that people are quite this muleheaded in every country, we seem to specialize in this.

kittehserf - MOD
10 years ago

Seen what Gobshite Scumbag Dawkins’s latest effort is? So much for his phoney apology for Dear Muslima.

Even worse for rape victims, in some societies women are blamed, shunned & even prosecuted for BEING RAPED. No wonder they don’t report it.

https://twitter.com/RichardDawkins/status/512992215191531520

Can’t let an opportunity pass to show his xenophobic, misogynist arse, can he?

There’s a good reply to it from linkshund:

I know mate. You live in/perpetuate one

kittehserf - MOD
10 years ago

Damnation, I also didn’t realise copying a twitter URL pasted the thing here.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

So, does he mean societies like the UK? Because that’s where I went to university, and some of the reports of what happens to victims who do report that you read about in sociology and criminology classes will turn your hair white.

Oh, wait, he was just using his distaste for religion as an excuse to be racist again. Never mind.

(Helpful reminder – men like Dawkins and their sexist pontificating are one of the reasons why it’s so hard for women who report in the UK. There are many men in the UK who are not part of the problem, but Dawkins? Definitely part of the problem.)

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

And I agree that letting the prion diseases spread further in the US is a terrible idea, but I’m not convinced the bullheadedness is unique. Look at our friend Dawkins above, for whom it appears to function as a substitute for religious beliefs.

The whole mindset of hunters is so completely baffling to me that I’m not even going to pretend to understand it. Like the Sierra Club has lots of them, so apparently some of them are interested in protecting the environment, but how that desire intersects with their desire to have majestic animals to go shoot for fun remains unclear to me.

redpoppy
redpoppy
10 years ago

kitteh, I lold too much at gobshite. Fancy overseas slang words make me happy. Though, I do actually know what gob is. I find regional slang to be a fascinating study. But as for Rear Admiral Gobshite, it’s maddening to hear him go off on that shit again. Apparently he doesn’t think “the west” has the same issues as Muslim countries. We do. If you fucking bother to pay attention. Critical thinking my ass.

redpoppy
redpoppy
10 years ago

Also, what the HELL is a dundridge? I make up words, too. But mine sound better. Because I’m more clever. 😛

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

Whenever he uses that word he reminds me of a particularly bad tempered teacher I had at boarding school. So basically he sounds like what an old curmudgeon sounded like in the 80s.

redpoppy
redpoppy
10 years ago

Ah, yes. The “get off my lawn” type of teacher. I’ve had a few of those. I wonder if the word he’s thinking of is dunderhead?

kittehserf - MOD
10 years ago

LOL redpoppy, I like regional slang too. I latched onto gobshite as an insult of choice first time I heard it. Can’t recall where it was, but it was probably some show set in the north of England, most likely Auf Wiedersehen, Pet.

kittehserf - MOD
10 years ago

Holy shit. Seen what that rape apologist – no, he’s gone past that, he’s a rape advocate these days – has followed this with?

Exactly. If you want to drive, don’t get drunk. If you want to be in a position to testify & jail a man, don’t get drunk.

So, women and girls, don’t ever drink anything in male company ever, because if he gets you drunk and rapes you, it will be Your Fault.

http://freethoughtblogs.com/entequilaesverdad/2014/09/19/dear-richard-dawkins-your-hypothetical-is-still-rape/

Anyone know how to contact Vetinari? Because I suspect he would like to use sarcasm on Dawkins before locking him in a dungeon. Or a scorpion pit. Or handing him over to Vimes.

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