[NOTE: The original video on Davis Aurini’s YouTube channel was taken down shortly after the post went up. So I’ve embedded the version that is, as of this moment, up on the director’s YouTube channel. I”d recommend that you download this for your permanent collection.]
Ok, so I’ve been working on a post about the latest ridiculous doings of our friends Davis Aurini and JordanOwen42 — the not-so-dynamic duo who’ve been desperately begging for money to make their Totally Serious documentary about how evil Anita Sarkeesian is. But then I watched this, and it’s too good not to post on its own.
This is Lust in the Time of Heartache, a short “philosophical” film written and produced, and just posted on teh Interwebs, by Mr. Aurini. I’m pretty sure it’s not supposed to be a comedy, but I was laughing at it from beginning to end.
There’s nothing about this film that’s not terrible and ridiculous, from the choice of fonts in the title sequence to the names of the characters as revealed in the closing credits.
Where even to start in criticizing this mess? The, er, “acting?” The pretentious, pseudo-philosophical voiceover, delivered by Mr. Aurini himself? The shrill, frantic — yet somehow also meandering — music that plays almost continuously from beginning to end? The ludicrously unconvincing fight choreography? The ill-fitting suits? The evo psych? The dawning recognition that this whole thing is meant to depict how Aurini sees himself in our “fallen” world?
The fact that this ten minute film credits a “parkour consultant?”
I’m going to borrow a couple of lines from Pauline Kael’s famous review of the legendarily stinky 1970 film Song of Norway because they offer a pretty fair assessment of this one as well:
The movie is of an unbelievable badness. … You can’t get angry at something this stupefying; it seems to have been made by trolls.
She means “under the bridge”-style trolls, not the modern kind.
Oh, and the sound is awful, too. NOTE: Dialogue is supposed to be louder than the background noises.
Anyway, just watch it. It’s only ten minutes long. And definitely stay for the final credits. You’ll see why.
But hey, don’t take my word for it. Read this glowing review, from some dude on YouTube:
Excellent writing that encompasses the transitions from one cinematic style to the next. At first I was concentrating on the technical problems and lackluster performances, however, after about 5 mins in, the pacing kicked up a notch. Well done, sir.
Dark Enlightenment sounds like a great title for a Doctor Who novel.
May I suggest a troll challenge? When we get an evo psych troll, can we force hir to end all sentences with “the mammoth”?
Okay, so….
I watched it with sound off, but captioning on. This… helped, in the sense of seeing the butchering process ‘helps’ identify Mystery Meat.
The cowboy scene is what happens when no bar will let you film your crap inside their establishment. The women are obviously meant to be “Sex and the City” types, because that’s still relevant (in MRAland). They get approached by a stranger–the cowboy–who is meant to be a stand-in for all the “Nice Guys” (one of them even uses that phrasing) who get taken advantage of by women who have no intention of fulfilling their sexual obligations that come from allowing someone to buy you a drink.
The fight scenes, though, are actually quite adept as an accidental visual metaphor for the way MRAs and other anti-feminists argue online. They make a post that seems to have the structure of an argument, but none of the actual logic, and which ignores the context, then expect their enemies to just fall upon it.
I thought corruptella was what you called nutella you left open too long…
I was going to do a point-for-point mockery of the troll from Page 1, but he probably won’t be back to see it. (Typical boring drive-by pooper!) So, instead, I think I’ll just drop in another fine piece of filmcraft from Western Canada:
Actually, this has it all over that…THING…up top.
I made it to four minutes. Diabolically bad.
@bodycrimes:
http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view5/2618106/diabolical-acting-o.gif
Hey, there’s some good humour to be had with pig Latin 🙂 (nil illegitimi carborundum)
I guess when you use forms like ‘masochistae’ then you’re actually trying to be serious and failing, though.
Well, yeah, there’s a difference between, say, Pratchett going Quanti canicula ille in fenestra and some deepity douchebag being all I AM SMARTER THAN YOU.
Fibinachi – that was a glorious takedown, and I’m in love with “ragesaurous wrathplex”. I’m so going to find opportunities to use that, if you don’t mind.
Well, sure, but don’t go making up imaginary struggles! Focus on REAL struggles and try to make change happen. Don’t go around hating on women and call that a “struggle”. THAT IS NOT A STRUGGLE. Tackling your own racist or sexist biases, hell, even walking around handing out a small plastic bag of wet wipes or snacks to the homeless…but no. That would be too hard and you don’t get the glory of being a hero.
Two people didn’t – Bench Dude who was begging and Pick Up Hick Dude who was hitting on those chicks with faux southern charm.
I’m with you there…hopefully it will so full of fail, it turns out amusing.
This made me LOL, no lie.
THANK YOU! I couldn’t think of why that phrase pissed me off so much and that’s exactly it!
Oh my. Oddly grateful for Aurini. If you can’t laugh at all this—the crazy-making upside-down-ness of it—you can spend an awful lot of time crying. Thanks, David Futrelle, for the whole zeitgeist of this blog.
Wow, is Aurini silly.
This dude went to college. Did he graduate? If so, what was his grade average?
Canadian taxpayers: demand your educational dollars back.
Ehehe, dude wants to talk, “two sides of the same coin”?
I work in the sex industry, so I hear guys going on all the time about how they (“they” just being the dudes who get off on it, I’m under no illusion that this is some universal male fantasy a la what men always say women want) desperately want a beautiful woman in heels to take advantage of their desperation and smack them around and insult them and so on, specifically because they’ve internalized that stereotype about women but have turned it into an indulge-on-the-side fetish (and, I can only hope, mostly conduct their day-to-day life without the same impression of all their female peers) instead of…this
But this had me laughing super hard because oh my goodness, it’s really the exact same thing, with the intense obsession over women being cackling exploitative bitches. ~Two sides of the same coin~
I think the character “Profuge” is my favorite. I can’t point him out to you, but apparently, he’s a professional fugue!
Good grief, this is awful and pretentious. Thanks, David!
OMG, Wordspinner! That creepy PM is HILARIOUS!!!
Yeah, victim and victimizer are NOT two sides of the same coin. One is the piñata and the other is the dude with the stick. You want two sides of the same coin? Try Nice Guy™ and douchebag.
@Fibinachi – I salute you!
@C.B. – Welcome! Please enjoy your welcome package. http://artistryforfeminismandkittens.wordpress.com/the-official-man-boobz-complimentary-welcome-package/
….
Ahahahaha! That was good! It made me laugh. It was supposed to make me laugh, right?
Wait…
It’s like watching The Room with Tommy Wiseau. It would have been better if he was in it.
Oh. Dear. God. As a Canadian, I feel obligated to fulfill the stereotype and apologize for this. I am so sorry.
One the bad (snarkily bad) things with these guys is they have ruined fedoras. I actually used to like them. (Oh god. Am I ostracized?)
Also, O/T, but is it true that ketchup chips are not really sold in the US?
RE: canuck with pluck
What on EARTH are ketchup chips?
http://www.canadianfavourites.com/mobile/product.aspx?ProductCode=lays212&404;http://www.canadianfavourites.com:80/Lays_Family_Size_Ketchup_Potato_Chips_270g_p/lays212.htm=
They are sinfully delicious. Although, I was eating the ketchup mini rice cakes.
Ketchup-flavored potato chips…yuck. (Admittedly, I have a thing against ketchup, and yes, I’m Canadian too.)
D:
OH GOD WHY DO THESE THINGS EXIST WHAT UNHOLY ABOMINATION
A) I can guarantee they taste nothing like actual ketchup
B) I guess you guys don’t want to hear aboot the maple flavored ones…(I haven’t actually tried those yet, though. Chips are a rare indulgence for me)