[NOTE: The original video on Davis Aurini’s YouTube channel was taken down shortly after the post went up. So I’ve embedded the version that is, as of this moment, up on the director’s YouTube channel. I”d recommend that you download this for your permanent collection.]
Ok, so I’ve been working on a post about the latest ridiculous doings of our friends Davis Aurini and JordanOwen42 — the not-so-dynamic duo who’ve been desperately begging for money to make their Totally Serious documentary about how evil Anita Sarkeesian is. But then I watched this, and it’s too good not to post on its own.
This is Lust in the Time of Heartache, a short “philosophical” film written and produced, and just posted on teh Interwebs, by Mr. Aurini. I’m pretty sure it’s not supposed to be a comedy, but I was laughing at it from beginning to end.
There’s nothing about this film that’s not terrible and ridiculous, from the choice of fonts in the title sequence to the names of the characters as revealed in the closing credits.
Where even to start in criticizing this mess? The, er, “acting?” The pretentious, pseudo-philosophical voiceover, delivered by Mr. Aurini himself? The shrill, frantic — yet somehow also meandering — music that plays almost continuously from beginning to end? The ludicrously unconvincing fight choreography? The ill-fitting suits? The evo psych? The dawning recognition that this whole thing is meant to depict how Aurini sees himself in our “fallen” world?
The fact that this ten minute film credits a “parkour consultant?”
I’m going to borrow a couple of lines from Pauline Kael’s famous review of the legendarily stinky 1970 film Song of Norway because they offer a pretty fair assessment of this one as well:
The movie is of an unbelievable badness. … You can’t get angry at something this stupefying; it seems to have been made by trolls.
She means “under the bridge”-style trolls, not the modern kind.
Oh, and the sound is awful, too. NOTE: Dialogue is supposed to be louder than the background noises.
Anyway, just watch it. It’s only ten minutes long. And definitely stay for the final credits. You’ll see why.
But hey, don’t take my word for it. Read this glowing review, from some dude on YouTube:
Excellent writing that encompasses the transitions from one cinematic style to the next. At first I was concentrating on the technical problems and lackluster performances, however, after about 5 mins in, the pacing kicked up a notch. Well done, sir.
Boo, I clicked the play button and it said the video is private.
Lust in the Time of Heartache
Hey!
He made it private. Has he developed self-awareness?
He made the vid private. Always d/l their shit before you post about it. It’s been a rule of mine so that when they get called out and then try to hide it I can reupload the video on another site.
It’s private. Guess Anton LaPUA doesn’t want us to see his cinematic mast…urbation.
Can Gabriel García Márquez’s estate sue him for this shit? Talk about bringing someone’s name into disrepute.
Made private already?
Wait, is this a copy of it?
http://youtu.be/uJSGc2ylZe4
The credits suggest it is. I’d download it, but I’m too lazy to find Youtube downloading software.
Mr C went to film school with a few incompetent and yet comically pretentious fools like this. It’s one of the reasons he quit. Having to sit through their, um, efforts in class was just too painful.
I gave up a couple of minutes in, it was just too boring.
I believe this is the video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uJSGc2ylZe4
I have to say, the fight choreography really is something to behold. It really is nice of the villains to attack his sai, so that he can just hold it out while they bang their swords and sticks against it. I wonder what he’d do if they attacked… oh, I don’t know, any other target.
That was absolutely awful.
WHAT MEN NEED TO KNOW:
You are disposable.
Women make the future slaves.
Whatever power you have as a man will be stripped from you via laws and policies.
It’s never OK to hit a woman in self-defense. Self-protection for men = self immolation.
Only your wallet matters. You as an individual don’t count.
You’re a disposable resource.
“My body, my choice” = men’s wallets and men’s future destruction.
You have zero reproductive rights.
If there’s a war, the patriarchy becomes the most important entity in existence.
Women like to marry up. Men are worthless if they don’t present an opportunity for women to marry up.
If there’s a war, feminism evaporates.
To overcome men’s natural strengths, they must be emasculated via policy and law.
Marriage for men now equals self-immolation. Only the most desperate pour the gas and strike the match. The rest suffer in agonizing silence. They’re neither seen nor heard. They die a slow, brutally painful death of deep regret.
Most women are narcissistic sociopaths. If they don’t appear that way to start out, marry them and then give them a reason to be disappointed. Ever wonder why a woman can’t pass a mirror without reflecting upon herself? Now you know.
It has been said that the surest way to a happy marriage is to always make sure your wife is happy. Translation: Kiss her butt and you’ll either end up divorced or wish you were dead.
Our society thrives on the disposability of men. What happens when men choose not to be disposable? Ever more misandric laws and policies. Women make the future slaves.
You’ve all read it before, but I’ll post it again for posterity:
The worlds shortest fairy tale – Once upon a time, a prince proposed to a princess. The princess refused the proposal. The prince lived happily ever after.
Is the cartoonishly pleasant city they’re filming in Canadian? It’s amusing to listen to his florid pseudo-existential voice-overs describe all this doom and despair in a place that looks completely safe and very comfortable.
Lol, if you can’t watch the whole thing, at least watch it from 6:40 – 7:22 for the not quite synced sound effects. Who knew nunchaku sounded like helicopters in the distance, but only some of the time?
Yay, a troll that knows how to use paragraphs! Not that I read it, but still! Paragraphs!
@Viro Dianc: Holy shit, that is some bad trolling. Seriously, this is possibly the most pitiful attempt to troll I have ever seen. 0/10, would not be trolled again.
What men need to know – if you get involved with the MRM you might end up like this Viro guy, running around posting confusing, off-topic rants on feminist blogs and calling it activism, and being totally confused as to why nobody seems to want to be around you.
Don’t be like Viro, kids.
U mad bro?
In all seriousness, this is gibberish.
What’s a land rapper? Do they dress in map of the world sweaters and rap about ecologically friendly farming techniques?
Since the guy put down a Canadian $20, I googled the name of the deli in the opening shot; it’s Calgary.
WHAT WOMEN NEED TO KNOW:
Men, like vampires, are not reflected in mirrors.
@Viro Dianc
This gets my vote:
I got bingo on the MRA Bingo card!
Trolling? Is that what that was?