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We cannot let women take over the tech industry. Because cats.

Typical female pretending to work
Typical female pretending to work

So here’s a new perspective on the whole “should we allow women to take over the tech industry or any other industry” question, courtesy of the Pro-Male/Anti-Feminist Technology blog. Yes, women, if you want to run a business or an industry you apparently have to check with the dudes at the Pro-Male/Anti-Feminist Technology blog first.

In a post titled “Why We Don’t Want Women Taking Over Tech Or Any Other Industry,” the ironically named “Reality forever” explains that women shouldn’t be allowed to run anything because, well, women are terrible and apparently love making everyone go to meetings:

[M]en are afraid of women in the workplace because all they bring is misery, low morale, lawsuits based on false accusations, insanity in general, never ending useless meetings and all around stupidity and dysfunction and low productivity.

Also, cats:

Even women hate working with other women. Put several cats in a small cage together and you’ll get the picture.

Huh. As sensible as Reality forever’s argument has been so far, I have a couple of slight objections to make here. Human women are not, to the best of my knowledge, cats.

Also, I’m pretty sure the issue here isn’t the cats so much as the whole small cage thing. Basically, if you put any animal – or person – in a small cage they’re going to be a bit grouchy, particularly if you stuff another couple of animals or people in there with them.

I mean, your uncle Ted might be the most affable fellow in the world, but if you throw him in a tiny cage with, say, your other uncle Brian, there’s going to be some friction. Toss in some cats, or perhaps a hyena or two, and you’re really asking for trouble.

Let’s let Reality forever continue, just in case his argument gets better.

But we can all give a sigh of relief because women will NEVER dominate any industry and there are specific reasons why. The reasons are contained in female nature. Any female above admin in any corporate office can barely even show up for work on any consistent basis.

I think he’s on to something. I sometimes see women walking around the streets in the middle of the day. They probably left to go to work in the morning but just got lost. Or distracted by a shoe sale. Women love shoes, amirite fellas high five.

I know this sounds insane, but we [have] thousands of clients and the vast majority of the companies wherein we have female contacts are rarely ever in. Many have taken off for a year at a tine.

You may not realize it, fellas, but women can just wander off on a break and not come back for a year.

It’s like this well hidden, but giant secret that no one talks about and I don’t think a lot of people are even aware of because women are so stealth at covering up their deviance and so many people will cover for them.

It’s true. If you look closely at many of the so-called women who work in your office you will discover that a lot of them are actually mannequins, carefully disguised to look like your female co-workers – who have probably been sitting on a tropical beach somewhere eating bon bons for the last 8 months with no one suspecting a thing.

In fact I’ve been trying to find other people who have seen this who deal with a large number of companies like I do.

They take off huge chunks of time- months even a year at a time then refuse to be at work before 11am and are gone by 2pm and never work on mon. or fri. then suddenly quits after a short time. Forever. Not just that job- all work completely.

It’s the dirty secret of the corporate world: most full-time women employees work only 12 hours a week, if that.

Women really only want to work part time if at all – they just like the idea of work and a status title and do not want to make any commitment to anything or anyone- especially women now.

It’s a little-known fact that Sheryl Sandberg’s official title at Facebook is “Pretty Princess of Operations” and that she only works three hours a week.

That is their flaky nature. And yes, they are ALL like that- 98% of them. And they’re lazy and don’t want to ever try harder or get out of their comfort zone or take risks. Women are their own worst enemies.

Oh, don’t be modest, Reality forever. People like you are their worst enemies.

In the comments, Reality forever expands upon his thesis.

I … work for a telecom and I’m in sales – so we have clients in virtually ALL industries and/or go to pitch potential clients in all industries. And I’ve been at it for 6 years total and with any females who have an actual title like IT Manager, VP or any kind of administrative anything, they are extremely clever at barely putting in any hours – I know because it’s my job (unfortunately) to have to deal with so many of them on a daily basis and communicate with them.

They’re extremely flaky, moody, never want any responsibilities at all to make any decisions, barely ever come into work, are as useless pedals on a wheelchair, spiteful, condescending, vindictive- the most horrible people I have ever had to deal with have all been women. And the vast majority of them are all the same in their patterns.

They’re overemotional about everything so they come off even creepy a lot of the time! With the men, it’s about 2-5% of them are jerks, flip that for women to about 2-5% of them are decent. That’s just been my experience dealing with all these women in virtually every industry there is.

And they are always just… OUT. Whether it’s ‘not in yet’ ‘already left for the day.’ Not in ‘today.’ ‘Out till next week.’ If I had 25 cents for every time I’ve heard ‘she’ is ‘out’ I would be wealthy, and no, they’re not just trying to avoid me and lying- they’ll actually be out, you can hear the sincerity in the voice of whoever’s telling me this that day. …

And I would expect it’s their being allergic to work that has kept them from really achieving anything across the board. And it’s ironically BECAUSE of Feminism that made them this way- everyone needs to make special ‘concessions’ for them and bend to them, not them needing to bend to fit in and join the work flow. …

Feminism, everything women are up to now, all of it, is mostly just a fraud and illusion and I’m telling you this thing of women being OUT all the time is real! Go to any company website in any industry, go to the staff directory, or go to Data.com connect and look up the staff directory for any company, then call and ask for any of the females above admin on that list and they will just happen to be out that day!

And it’ll be like Tuesday at 11am. It’s this phenomenon that I’ve been trying to tell people about for years, but they just don’t believe me or don’t understand what I’m talking about.

Huh. It must be true. Because I can’t think of any other reason women would want to avoid taking a call from you.

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Michelle C Young
10 years ago

@cassandrakitty

Or at least more likely to go “Ugh, that guy, the one who always rants about how terrible women are? Just tell him I moved to the Bahamas”.

Once up a time, years ago, there was a vendor, whom my boss just hated. So, instead of just saying, “No,” to put the vendor out of his misery, I was instructed to string him along. Yeah, it was mean, and I would have much rather just said, “No,” and ended it. After all, it was wasting MY time. But my boss wanted this guy to suffer.

I have no idea what that vendor did to deserve such a fate. Hmm. Maybe he vented some awful sexist screed about female executives?

I’ve worked for several executives over the years, in many different companies and industries, and they all have something in common: They don’t really like talking to vendors.

Michelle C Young
10 years ago

@HowlOwl

“as useless [as] pedals on a wheelchair” = because you’re only allowed to use a wheelchair if can’t move your legs/have no legs -_- Wow, sexism and ableism in one go! Do you think he was worried he wouldn’t fill he quota of awful for the day?

I know, right? Because no one has ever used a wheelchair because they’re just so darned weak from the chemotherapy, or dialysis, or what-have-you? Or maybe because they have dizzy spells, and use a chair to avoid falling down and injuring themselves. Or maybe they’re just dealing with a hip that keeps falling out of its socket, but their ankles work just fine. Maybe their knees function, but don’t support their weight.

Nope, the only reason to use a wheelchair is if you’re a paraplegic. Obviously.

Silly me. I guess that time I rented a chair was just a figment of my imagination. And the time my Mom rented a chair at Disney World, and then just shuffled herself along with her feet, because it took too much upper-body strength to work the wheels herself – that was my imagination, too.

You know, pedals would have been AWESOME! Someone needs to create a pedal-operated wheelchair, please!

Michelle C Young
10 years ago

No, it’s not a bicycle. Bikes, and even trikes, are forbidden in many areas where a wheelchair would have access. For example – Disney World. No biking through the parks.

But a pedal-operated wheelchair, for those who could use it, but still require the support of a chair? That’s a fantastic thing!

ridley40
10 years ago

We quite often say senior staff are ‘out’ when salespeople call. Because they’ve got better things to do.

brooked
brooked
10 years ago

@kittehserf – Ahem. Yes. Excuse me while I quietly vomit after viewing the meme, but yes. Have you read “God under Howard” by Marion Maddox? That, together with “The new puritans” By Dr. Muriel Porter, are a really, really good look into how US style religious politics was imported to Australia.

Sorry Australia. (Yet another one added to the list of countries I feel the need to apologize to for the my country’s sad antics.)

Syburi
10 years ago

@ vaiyt – Estrogen and bio-truths. Not because we were sick of straight, old white men telling us what to think, in their interest, at our expense. Nope. Not at all. Never.

kittehserf - MOD
kittehserf - MOD
10 years ago

I reckon we’d have come up with those shitbags even without the US influence, brooked, so no need to apologise. Gawd knows we’ve got enough to apologise for ourselves.

Michelle C Young
10 years ago

@Kittehserf – Thanks. Yes, and no. I’m better enough to get online for an hour, but not really better. However, I FINALLY have the doctor’s referral! YAAAAY! So, things are looking up.

I have to get off, now, though. But I did enjoy reading David’s writing, and the comments here.

Y’all really brighten my day!

Syburi
10 years ago

@brooked – Well, it came to you from Britain. And it came to Britain from Switzerland. And they caught it from the former Holy Roman Empire… Colonialism. What is it good for?

aebars
10 years ago

Hey, David, I just heard about this on LiberalAmerica.org:

http://www.liberalamerica.org/2014/09/16/this-book-teaches-us-all-about-raising-boys-feminists-will-hate/

Have you ever heard about this? Read it?

If not, for God’s sake, do! And write a post about it!

kittehserf - MOD
kittehserf - MOD
10 years ago

And it came to Britain from Switzerland.

Bloody Calvin!

/stillfightingtheWarsofReligion

Syburi
10 years ago

@kittehserf – And economics. It was Calvin who decided it was okay to charge interest on loans. Right about the time of the start of modern banking.

Alisha
Alisha
10 years ago

I’ve done the job this guy does, and he does have a point about women being unreachable. The issue is not that they aren’t working, it’s that they’re smart enough to avoid conversations with sales guys. People in these positions get hundreds of calls per day from someone wanting to sell them something. Telephony is a nightmare to sell because companies only buy phones about every 15 years. Speaking with every sales rep trying to push something you don’t need is very time consuming and keeps you from focusing on your REAL job – evaluating products you DO need. Basically, this man is complaining because the men he works with aren’t as good as women when it comes to blowing off unsolicited calls. Also, part of this guy’s job would be to build relationships with potential clients. I have a feeling he has a problem developing report with females. I wonder why…

saphy
saphy
10 years ago

@aebars

I saw that the other day!! Isn’t it amazing? I especially love the cover image. Is it Aslan? Considering how he treated Susan, it probably is.

vaiyt
10 years ago

Parent, if you have a young son and you want him to grow up to be a man, then you need to keep him away from pop culture, public school and a lot of Nancy Boy churches.

So, basically, raise your boy like a fundie? *shrug*

Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
10 years ago

and are gone by 2pm and never work on mon. or fri. then suddenly quits after a short time. Forever. Not just that job- all work completely.

There is no such thing as work once you leave the corporate 9 to 5 world. Houses spontaneously clean themselves, yards never need mowing and pruning, community and volunteer work does itself, children don’t require any parental effort whatsoever, food just mysteriously shows up on the table fully cooked. Once you quit your job, it’s 24/7 hammocks and soap operas.

It’s like this well hidden, but giant secret that no one talks about and I don’t think a lot of people are even aware of

We’re all too busy covering up contrails, government-poisoned snow, the Siri Apocalypse, and the fact that Denver International Airport has a FEMA camp underneath it and is actually a secret portal to Hades. It takes an enormous amount of work not to talk about these things in front of people who aren’t in the know.

Oh sorry, I forgot: work is something you only do in a cubicle on weekdays from 9 to 5.

Many have taken off for a year at a tine.

Fork you.

kittehserf - MOD
kittehserf - MOD
10 years ago

@kittehserf – And economics. It was Calvin who decided it was okay to charge interest on loans. Right about the time of the start of modern banking.

Arrrrgh! *&^%$)!

Many have taken off for a year at a tine.

Fork you.

BWAHAHAHAHAHA

Aitch
Aitch
10 years ago

@Syburi

@kittehserf – And economics. It was Calvin who decided it was okay to charge interest on loans. Right about the time of the start of modern banking.

I thought before that, Christians were using the Jews as bankers, because the Catholic church prohibited interest? (Which gave rise to a metric fuckton of anti-Semitic ‘greed’ stereotypes). So I guess that could be ‘sorta’ progressive, at least they weren’t relegating one religion to one function in the economy anymore?

On the ‘work morale’ thing, I rarely believe anyone who says they can focus purely on their office job and be available for all requests for eight hours straight.

grumpyoldnurse
10 years ago

@ Syburi –

It annoys the fundies no end that a disabled, educated grandma Witch takes them on over shit like this.

You so cool!!

Cassie's Major Domo
Cassie's Major Domo
10 years ago

OMG, all the women in my office came into work today!

It’s the apocalypse!

DOGS AND CATS LIVING TOGETHER… MASS HYSTERIA!

grumpyoldnurse
10 years ago

@ Buttercup Q. Skullpants –

We’re all too busy covering up contrails, government-poisoned snow, the Siri Apocalypse, and the fact that Denver International Airport has a FEMA camp underneath it and is actually a secret portal to Hades. It takes an enormous amount of work not to talk about these things in front of people who aren’t in the know.

Way to spill the beans! I’m telling Gloria Steinem on you!!

Kevin K
Kevin K
10 years ago

work for a telecom and I’m in sales.

Translation: Cold caller. Trying to get people to switch their service. Or “upgrade” to something they have absolutely no need for or interest in.

Yeah, I used to be one of those people that got inbounds from maroons like this all the time. Trust me, I was sitting in my office, doing what I was paid to do. “Out” means “get a clue.”

Never, ever, ever, ever let someone like this know your direct line. Never.

Shaenon
10 years ago

This guy is of course a very special level of hilarious, but he’s not the first MRA I’ve seen trying to claim that selling consumer electronics makes him a STEM professional. Honey, I worked at a phone bank too. It sucks, and you have my sympathy, but cold-calling about cell phone plans doesn’t make you “in telecom” any more than conducting political surveys made me the President.

Also

feeeeeeeeemaaaaales

Shaenon
10 years ago

FEEEEEEEEEEEEMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALESSSSSS

AbsintheDexterous
AbsintheDexterous
10 years ago

Dude. They’re avoiding you because they don’t want to waste their precious time listening to a sales pitch for something they already know they don’t want. Or they don’t want it from YOU.

I never understood this, actually. Before the job I have now, I worked on a service desk. Occasionally we’d get a call from someone (usually male) asking to speak with someone in charge of something and you could TOTALLY smell “unsolicited sales call” in their speech. The company I work for is a largish company – what on earth would make them think that we’d even consider buying from them!? We have all of the possible vendors that we need, and if we did decide to change, a lot of research will go on and it certainly won’t be based on some guy’s sales pitch. It’s like they didn’t understand how corporations worked. I always found out who the assistant was and transferred them into the assistant’s voicemail.

The funny thing is, it didn’t matter if the VP of Whatever was male or female, I wasn’t going to transfer those calls to anything but the assistant’s voicemail. Sure, Random Sales Dude, you play golf with the VP – that’s why you had to call the general service desk number and not the VP’s cell phone. Oh, I’m sorry – I only have internal extensions and can’t give you a direct number or outside extension. I’m sure the assistant will call you back…