There are a lot of good reasons why the words “creepy” and “expat” end up together so often. But sometimes the word “creepy” really isn’t strong enough.
Take the latest post on Random Xpat Rantings, the blog of an especially creepy 50-something expat living in Bali. “Xplat’s” posts are almost always skin-crawlingly awful, but he’s really outdone himself with a sexually explicit ode to cross-generational, er, “romance” titled “The value of being the center of religious devotion.”
He’s not big on self-awareness, this guy.
He starts off with this doozy:
Many people, men included, can’t seem to wrap their minds around why on earth a man would date a teenager 30 years younger than himself.
No, I think pretty much everyone knows why you’re “dating” a teenager – in a country with a per-capita income one-fifteenth that of the United States.
An 18 year old is capable of extreme crushes, and can be brought into a religious reverie of constant devotion towards her man.
Like I said, he’s not big on self-awareness.
Especially if she’s given regular doses of intense sex. Intense physically, erotically, emotionally, violently, romantically, exhibitionously, and any other ly. Just intense experience in which it feels as if you share the same emotional and physical worlds.
Exhibitionously? (Not a real word.) Violently?
After some vaguely Buddhist pseudo-profundities on the nature of “love,” he launches into a grotesque and explicit discussion of how the young woman he calls “N18” pleasures him sexually “with frenzied devotion.” We’ll just skip past that and move on to this:
I am the center of her world, and when we are together you will see her spend all her attention on trying to make me happy. I don’t dole out love constantly, but she relishes each burst of it, and patiently waits around for the next dose.
His hot-and-cold approach to doling out “love” is of course a classic abuser tactic.
This is not just a matter of blow jobs on command. This is loving devoted passionate blow jobs.
That’s why an older man would date an 18 year old. Because they make excellent devoted sex slaves.
I’m speechless.
Even after four years of writing about the “manosphere” I’m still amazed and appalled by the ways these guys manage to outdo themselves in awfullness.
“I’m too insecure and self-loathing to ever trust another human being to satisfy my desires if I don’t dominate them into doing it. I’m so pathetic that I’ve built my whole life and identity around having access to people that I can easily control into putting up with my banal narcissism because the very thought of being in a relationship with anyone with any power absolutely terrifies me.”
*shuffles in*
>>>And, as Granny Weatherwax reminds us, evil always starts with treating other people as things.<<<
Best quote ever.
*shuffles out*
I’d call myself a Feminist, and I’m very sex-positive. I’ve defended BDSM-type stuff before (not a practitioner myself), because as icky as a lot of it may appear to outsiders, many bottoms/subs genuinely feel empowered by their role.
Perhaps more controversially, I’ve also defended “May-September romances” (or whatever you may call it), because while it’s usually healthiest to date people your own age – love works in mysterious way, etc.
But THIS SHIT? Jesus Christ. This shit is abuse, plain and simple. This shit is evil.
And I bet this asshole is *really* proud of himself for not raping underage girls, even though his… behavior is only marginally better. What a pathetic, insecure little man.
Is this pre-emptive due to the recent threads we have had on victim-blame?
Or has someone already played the victim-blame card in this thread?
As a Manboobz-reading feminist, my experience is that my fellow expats are no more creepy than the population back home. (Certainly the handful of bloggers I’ve met IRL have set off my creep-dar more often than expats…) There are some exceptions – certain parts of certain countries in South-East Asia attract a lot of icky types, such as Cambodia, Thailand, Burma and the Philippines. But even when I visited Cambodia, all the expats I met seemed totally normal. I suspect a lot of the predators don’t mix with other foreigners, knowing they’d be quickly ostracised.
Ugh. The dehumanizing aspect really bothers me too, and it’s something I see a lot on these manosphere blogs. The fact that these women/girls are routinely referred to as “N18” and “HB9” really ups the creepiness factor for me. I get why they don’t want to use their names (probably for fear of repercussions), but a numbering system? Yuck. It makes me think of assigning numbers to prisoners. Of course, this goes hand in hand with their belief system that women are not individuals and are public property.
By “love”, dude means MONEY. There is nothing else that could persuade an impoverished teenager to put up with his shit.
Brain bleach first, then I’ll read the rest:
@Michael McG – It’s preemptive. Hopefully, the mods will delete any such posts, but they do seem to be inevitable. Or at least ubiquitous.
Totally OT, but my kitty just made me take off my long-sleeved shirt before she would cuddle with me. She only likes bare arms (she likes to lick and suck, as close as possible to my armpit), and kept nudging at the sleeve, as if to make it go away. As soon as my arm was bare, she was happy as the proverbial clam.
Mittens is so weird. I love her.
@strivingally – I think that kitten is dreaming of ping pong.
Gross.
Does this asshole really equate his little Stockholm Syndrome scenario with actual devotion? And how fucking narcissistic do you have to be to think that “religious devotion” from a partner (I use the term extremely loosely) is a preferable situation to sharing your bed with someone who can actually relate to you as another real live person?
ALL THE NOPE. Time for some more Laci Green. 😀
AAAAHHHHHH NO WRONG LINK
Thanks for the Laci Green! That first video – the 5 problems with victim blaming, really was spot on.
Ew, petitioning whatever god exists to drop a meteor on this guy’s head. Or maybe the earth could just open up and swallow him up, so long as this person falls off the face of the earth I’m not picky.
My sister lived in Indonesia for a year on a high school exchange. Just the fact that these girls are only two or three years older than she was is really disturbing. I don’t think I’m going to be sharing any of these expat articles with her. She’s knows someone that could have ended up in the same position as this girl, and that just makes it worse.
I’ve said this a million times as I’m sure everyone else here has as well: I don’t want to live on this planet, anymore. Someone point me in the direction of Kitten Planet.
@Alex
The Human Botfly. I would prefer Myiasis to sharing a planet with this creep.
Why does society refuse to see these RedPill types as the sexual predators that they are? It’s really getting disheartening. -_-
This thread needs more Dean Winchester. Take it away, Dean:
http://replygif.net/147
Why u no embed, gif? Huh.
proxieme:
QFFT
Alex:
(TW: creepy insect) The house centipede, aka the “thousand-legger.” They’re creepy, and they move fast, and they have a habit of darting out of drains without warning. But they eat other bugs so they’re actually pretty beneficial.
I spent some months in French Polynesia in the late 80s. I met American expats just like this. Rare, truly rare, but they were there, and not at all trying to hide themselves.
he’s likely lying about his “companion” being 18; usually they are 14-16. they often trick the girl’s parents into thinking that allowing their daughter to be with them will give them access to the US, money, or some other way of increasing their potential.
I listened to them speak about it, they having not the slightest remorse about their behavior in the slightest. to them, it was as normal as getting drunk on a saturday night.
still shudder when I think about it. The horrendous reality of it. That people can just turn off their entire sense of morality, ethics, and even empathy. It was fascinating, like a dead body in a car crash.
I do want to stress though, that I have never seen this any other time or place in my travels, so it’s not a feature of expats in general, just to be clear.
Hi, Icthyic!
On the OP, I haven’t anything to add but this.
http://www.reactiongifs.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/nope.gif
The response to Xplat and all who would defend him that immediately pops to mind comes from RoboCop: “Listen pal, your client’s a scumbag, you’re a scumbag, and scumbags see the judge on Monday morning!
I spent a few years working in Thailand and I met many dirty old sex-pats. Creepy is not the word. They exist in a world of wrong. Because I was undergoing a mid-life crisis myself at the time (I bought an electric ukulele for heavens sake, WHY????), I decided to try and find out what made them tick. I wrote a collection of short ‘Roman a clef’ stories about them and they came off rather tragic. The results are pretty horrifying, grotesque but also quite ridiculous.
*poof*
Hey all, quick reminder that we’re playing Go on the KGS server pretty soon. Go here for details.
*unpoof*