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Exciting new meme: #ConfusedJanetBloomfield AgainstFeminism

JBconfusedcat

When I saw this quote from our old friend, A Voice For Men’s repeatedly-banned-from-Twitter Social Media Director Janet Bloomfield, it seemed to me to be so extravagantly confused that even the most confused cat against feminism would be embarrassed to have said it. So I made a new meme for it. Ta da!

Here’s the whole paragraph the quote comes from:

I am often accused of simply not understanding what feminism IS when I dare to criticize it, especially on Twitter. Get a dictionary, blah blah blah whatever. See, here’s the thing: I know exactly what feminism IS and the claim that feminists stand for gender equality is not only outright laughable, I’m beginning to see it as a calculated, deliberate, malicious lie. Feminists damn well know they are seeking superiority and the wholesale destruction of society as we know it to be replaced by a brutal matriarchy in which all women and the remaining men will be subject to totalitarian controls that would make Stalin green with envy.

Not all the remaining men! I have been assured I will be guaranteed a spot in Women’s Country with the other male servitors.

Anyhoo, if anyone else feels inspired to do any meme-ing, there are certainly any number of quotes about feminism from MRAs that might work well for similar graphics. No need to stick with cats. There are any number of animals that might better symbolize confused MRAs, from dung beetles to snakefish to bat guano. Ok, that last one isn’t strictly speaking an animal, but you get the idea.

 

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Emmy Rae
Emmy Rae
6 years ago

@fruitloopsie Your skit made me LOL.

GrumpyOldNurse
GrumpyOldNurse
6 years ago

@ fruitloopsie – google snurt yaktak brik brak. Also, bonbon! And purse!

idledillettante
6 years ago

@ frootloopsie I like this skit. She really does act that way, like because she succeeded in insulting you she’s got the higher ground somehow.

Funnier is how she acts like being suspended 2x from Twitter actually helps promote men’s rights because of “the censorship”; then asks for right-wing journalists to contact her to try and “get the message out.” Almost like she’s looking for some more attention now that it’s apparent Twitter is not going to give her back her more valuable accounts, the one with 10,000 followers

GrumpyOldNurse
GrumpyOldNurse
6 years ago

orrySay ontrapanglosscay! ayI unkedflay atinLay niay oolschay.

(I never get to be one of the cool kids ::snif::)

idledillettante
6 years ago

Actually it was more like 77.7K but who’s counting? Janet Bloomfield sure isn’t, at least if you ask her.

GrumpyOldNurse
GrumpyOldNurse
6 years ago

@ idleddillettante – I just wish I could figure out what the Hell her message is supposed to even be. Honestly, she just sounds like a disaffected, bored crank!

fruitloopsie
fruitloopsie
6 years ago

Henchmen find fndnnjenfnen jenchenchfn mend fndnnjenfnen jenchenchfn dj jsndnjdenj jenchenchfn dj jenchenchfn Jenna jenchenchfn he dj kaka ism fun jamend wild fndnnjenfnen for jenchenchfn jencnskdj jamakdjrnkd jsndnjdenj ienfjjsfmje ienfjjsfmje iwmdksmfmrm ken firm mend kaka of f MGM ienfjjsfmje isms,s weed and dj room ask dj that hf pkjg had the dj dhenncdn hd funny jfhfhdnc jenchenchfn Jam poo di. Jenchenchfn smd dj handbag fhebndj

Translation: thanks everyone

contrapangloss
6 years ago

Hey! We could be dorky and use fictional languages from matriarchal cultures!

Shlu’ta Usstan inbal miulk’ars whol doerin phor xuil nindol ishwi inth?

fruitloopsie
fruitloopsie
6 years ago

Contrapangloss
Please teach us master!

vaiyt
6 years ago

Honestly, she just sounds like a disaffected, bored crank!

Hard to sound like anything else when that’s what she is.

Bogdan
Bogdan
6 years ago

Feminists damn well know they are seeking superiority and the wholesale destruction of society as we know it to be replaced by a brutal matriarchy in which all women and the remaining men will be subject to totalitarian controls that would make Stalin green with envy.

Yay for more transparent fear mongering.

marinerachel
marinerachel
6 years ago

Did you see our new baby orca, contrapangloss? Two days old and sooooooper cute!

And that’s why we like orca: MATRIARCHY! BONBONS! APEX PREDATOR!

contrapangloss
6 years ago

For the curious, translation of previous: “Can I have minions for coming up with this brilliant scheme?”

I tend to default to drow as the stereotypical dudebro’s worst nightmare of a matriarchical culture. Seriously, though, drow society would never work. Nope. Not at all.

But, their language is kind of fun! It’s like a odd mixture of tolkien elvish and dwarfish, with respect to pronunciation, with a tinge of tolkien spiders thrown in for good fun.

If I were to translate the above, the closest I could get would be:

Usstan thugrin mumbaro ulu ilythiiri ‘zil l’waela jaluk rivvil’s sslith ramoth d’natha jalil nau’thalus tekartas. Akntoa, d’elezz, ilythiiri tekartas orn’la neitar xund. Nobe. Naut a jal. Jhal, nind xanalress zhah valyrin d’jivvin! Ol zhah saph natha vec’end seib’n d’Tolkien k’shish lu’dwarfish, xuil bel’lain ulu ul’trin, xuil natha ul’trin d’Tolkien orbben luthk wun whol bwael jivvin.

You can totally cheat and find a translator, though. When I’m lazy, this link does a pretty good forward translation.

I haven’t tried it for back translating, though.

GrumpyOldNurse
GrumpyOldNurse
6 years ago

Wow, contrapangloss! May I please be one of your minions? I have many practical skills, and if anyone gets hurt, well, I am a nurse! I can totally call 911!

pallygirl
pallygirl
6 years ago

I am alarmed at the picture. I blame the movie Mars Attacks.

marinerachel
marinerachel
6 years ago

THAT’S WHAT IT REMINDS ME OF!!!!!!!!!

contrapangloss
6 years ago

@marinerachel:

BABY ORCA!!!! Indeed, sooooooper cute. Are we thinking of the same baby whale? Samish’s baby?

SEAK’s pods haven’t seemed to have had quite as rough a last few years as WA and BC’s three, particularly J, but baby orcas! THEY ARE CUTE AND GOOD AND WONDERFUL!

roguepixie
roguepixie
6 years ago

Once we take over the world, can we finally get an evil space ship? (My vote goes for The Narada.)

Shaenon
6 years ago

Did that guy read what he typed!? Has he even spoke to actual woman before!?

Did you even read his post? He’s had female coworkers! One of them was a lesbian, which proves something. Many of them worked tech or labor jobs, but don’t let that fool you, because 95% of women are secretaries. When the apocalypse comes, these women will be helpless because they don’t know how to do anything but sit around typing on computers. They’ll be forced to suck up to the new rulers of the planet: men who don’t know how to do anything but sit around typing on computers.

Then we’ll all be sorry we were feminists!

To be honest, this is one of the less sad MRA comment sections I’ve seen. At least they seem to have some hobbies outside of complaining about women.

cloudiah
6 years ago

The magical chant that would bring about our long-desired, brutally oppressive matriarchy:

“Why are we here today?”

“To make revolution,”

“What kind of revolution?”

“The Cultural Revolution,”

“And how do we make Cultural Revolution?”

“By destroying the American family!”

“How do we destroy the family?”

“By destroying the American Patriarch,”

“And how do we destroy the American Patriarch?”

“By taking away his power!”

“How do we do that?”

“By destroying monogamy!” they shouted.

“How can we destroy monogamy?”

“By promoting promiscuity, eroticism, prostitution and homosexuality!”

I kind of love it. Especially that very last line, which I’m going to be chanting under my breath all day.

cloudiah
6 years ago

Another magical anti-patriarchy talisman:

http://i.imgur.com/hWTnXce.gif

Robert
Robert
6 years ago

The idea of Unitarians performing human sacrifice is strangely amusing. Reminds me of when I was running the D&D campaign, and had the party encounter some pilgrims from the Cult of the Ichor God Bel-Shamharoth (Reformed). The pilgrims turned out to be on their way to the Spring Picnic and Jumble Sale, and were innocuous to the point of being ridiculous.

Now I’m trying to imagine Satanist Unitarians.

fruitloopsie
fruitloopsie
6 years ago

Sheanon
Yes I know. it’s something that he could predict the future and using ‘science’ about the downfall of civilization after seeing a couple women at his work place.

Falconer
6 years ago

You can totally cheat and find a translator, though. When I’m lazy, this link does a pretty good forward translation.

Awkward naked Poser-rendered drow chick for the win.

Falconer
6 years ago

They mentioned it to their parents, who reacted by saying, almost word for word, that it was

a communist pseudo-church service where they all chanted to destroy the american family by promoting promiscuity and homosexuality.

They also claimed in all seriousness that Unitarians practice human sacrifice.

Wow, we Unitarians sound really hard core. Like Bubbles.

contrapangloss
6 years ago

@Falconer…

Yeah, totally didn’t notice that. Whoops!

I kind of have tunnel vision on web pages, and sidebar thingies float right past me…

My bad.

Eep.

What has been seen can no longer be unseen.

contrapangloss
6 years ago

… I also tend to use the mini-popup one, at this different link, with no artwork? If you don’t want to see the why the heck is this nonononono awfulness that means I’m probably never visiting the main link ever again?

http://www.eilistraee.com/chosen/language_mini.php

This one is clean.

This is what I get for googling instead of hunting through bookmarks.

My apologies.

contrapangloss
6 years ago

Nevermind. New link not clean. It goes to the same page, as soon as you hit translate.

I’m going back to my excel dictionary that I created in fiction nerd phase in HS… I’ll emerge if I ever get a translate program of my own up and running without terribad art.

Falconer
6 years ago

The idea of Unitarians performing human sacrifice is strangely amusing. Reminds me of when I was running the D&D campaign, and had the party encounter some pilgrims from the Cult of the Ichor God Bel-Shamharoth (Reformed). The pilgrims turned out to be on their way to the Spring Picnic and Jumble Sale, and were innocuous to the point of being ridiculous.

Now I’m trying to imagine Satanist Unitarians.

I’m sure there are some. Like all Satanists, I imagine that UU Satanists try not to hurt anybody.

Our local chapter has several witches. They tend to hold ceremonies at solstices and equinoxes. Every service begins with the congregation turning to the four winds. The closest we’ve gotten to hate was when that jerk attacked services at the Knoxville chapter and shot a couple of people. A niece of one of the dead people came to our memorial service and obviously felt compelled to witness to us. She had tears in her eyes as she told us that her aunt was now in Hell and we were wrong and would follow her aunt. I felt an odd mixture of it is unbearably horrible that your aunt is dead and really? go fuck yourself.

I’m only barely a Unitarian: I’ve been to a few services and some potlucks, and a couple of parenting group meetings at the local branch. When my devout Presbyterian cousin asked me if we had a “home church,” I said we’d been attending the local Unitarian outfit because I could smell a hard sell coming.

Falconer
6 years ago

Aw geez, contrapangloss, no harm done to me. It sounds like you’ve been inconvenienced, and I’m sorry for that.

Cassie's Major Domo
Cassie's Major Domo
6 years ago

Our local chapter has several witches. They tend to hold ceremonies at solstices and equinoxes.

During the times when I sometimes attended a local Unitarian chapter (I never really got the hang of the Sunday Services things, so despite really liking what the stand for, I stand can’t officially join them) we had a very large Pagan segment in our church. I don’t remember them doing any special ceremonies however.

My mother has told me that in the church she grew up in, they were regularly told that Catholics sacrificed babies in secret. I later learned that this bit of anti-Catholic propaganda is quite widespread.

Kevin K
Kevin K
6 years ago

Satanist UUs have the human sacrifice…but without the humans. They substitute lemon squares and a pot luck.

maistrechat
6 years ago

I think their logic went something like this

I)People will do anything that is not explicitly forbidden
II)UU lacks a formal creed

Therefore Unitarians practice human sacrifice since they don’t have a rule explicitly telling them not to

leftwingfox
6 years ago

Falconer: You cannot fool me, I’ve seen the manifesto of Unitarian Jihad firsthand!

http://www.sfgate.com/entertainment/carroll/article/JON-CARROLL-3324002.php

Cassie's Major Domo
Cassie's Major Domo
6 years ago

@Falconer

I remember something that particularly infuriated me in the wake of those Knoxville killings was that conservative pundits started to shout that this was an example of the persecution of Christians. The hypocrisy was unbelievable, since these are the same conservatives who regularly dumped on UU as… well, see all of the above slurs. They didn’t want to recognize the obvious, which was that the church was targeted, according to the killer, “because of its liberal teachings and his belief that all liberals should be killed because they were ruining the country.”

Heather
Heather
6 years ago

Am I the only one befuddled by “all women and the remaining men will be subject…”? So, under feminism women are being oppressed as well as men. Ummm…well, I guess she means the women who aren’t feminists, and that there will be a select few women who call themselves Feminists who control the rest of the women, brainwashing them to hate men. Orwell did a much better job on the toilet.

And by “remaining men” she is inferring that many if not most of them will be gone. Does she mean dead? Do the feminists kill them all? I don’t see what else “the remaining men” after the Great Feminism Coup could mean! This is sick!

The thing that gets on my nerves the most about these antifem women is that they are quite proud of the fact that they make no sense. And I mean, they don’t even try to. It wouldn’t make sense for them to make sense, being that they are women themselves. Their diatribes are just words put together, like a poem that doesn’t make sense yet has an emotional affect. At least the antifem women of old put some thought into their arguments, even just a sprinkling, and didn’t have to resort to being foul.

opium4themasses
opium4themasses
6 years ago

@Cassie’s Major Domo What I find particularly NAD is their co-opting of religious persecution of Christians in non-Christian nations to justify using the levers of power to support or enhance their goals in the US. Not getting to have their values enforced on others is apparently persecution of them.

opium4themasses
opium4themasses
6 years ago

Uhh. I mean bad not NAD. That was a weird autocorrect.

strivingally
6 years ago

@opium4themasses:

I still can’t believe they managed to get SCOTUS to support the idea that an employer negating part of an employee’s health benefits is “protection of religious liberty”. I mean, WTF. If you ever want proof that the US Christian Right isn’t facing any kind of persecution, that’s it right there – that a superficially ludicrous argument that a 7-year-old could pick apart is now the law of the land.

Still waiting for the same people to lose their shit the first time an Islamic-owned business tries to invoke exactly the same law.

marinerachel
marinerachel
6 years ago

Nope contrapangloss, not Samish’s calf. I don’t think she’s had a calf since 2009 (though she had a grandcalf in 2012.)

Did you mean Surprise? Because, yeah, L86 popped another one! Took her nine years since the last calf but the population is doing so badly you can’t blame her.

By the end of his life J1 was siring way too many calves in that population with whales way too closely related to him. It sucks that the population has no future due to it’s lack of genetic diversity. They’ll either disappear entirely or the leftover whales will engage in abnormal behaviour and breed with different populations they cross paths with. Either way, they’re not sticking around. We’ve done too much damage.

This is one reason I focus on the northern residents and the Biggs’ of BC and SE Alaska. Less depressing.

marinerachel
marinerachel
6 years ago
kirbywarp
kirbywarp
6 years ago

*poof*

Minor distraction! I’ve decided on a first pass at a time for another Go learning/playing session. See here in the last open thread for details, and to let me know if you want to join in and what times would work out for you.

*poof*

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
6 years ago

@strivingally:

I still can’t believe they managed to get SCOTUS to support the idea that an employer negating part of an employee’s health benefits is “protection of religious liberty”. I mean, WTF. If you ever want proof that the US Christian Right isn’t facing any kind of persecution, that’s it right there – that a superficially ludicrous argument that a 7-year-old could pick apart is now the law of the land.

Even better, they did so without one word about the religious liberties of or the harms caused to the employees. If nothing else proves SCOTUS just tries to find ways to justify what they already believe rather than figure out what the true best ruling should be, Hobby Lobby does.

grumpycatisagirl
grumpycatisagirl
6 years ago

Satanist UUs have the human sacrifice…but without the humans. They substitute lemon squares and a pot luck.

Ha ha. I’m UU and I love this.

contrapangloss
6 years ago

Yeah, I meant Surprise.

Whoops. I saw the S, and was a little over hopeful. L pod makes more sense, though. The Southern Rezzies are the most depressing of populations, but that might just be because we know enough about them for them to be depressing.

The LA pod is still mysterious and awesome. I have no clue how they’re doing.

But… The little tyke is SO cute!

Who’s an adorable baby orca! YOU ARE!

opium4themasses
opium4themasses
6 years ago

Plus there is the ancient UU joke.

When the church is on fire, Catholic priests run in for the cross, Baptists run in for the Bible, and UUs run in for the coffee maker.

contrapangloss
6 years ago

Marinerachel…

You wouldn’t have happened to hear any news of the LA pod, would you?

Last update I had was 2009, with a potential group spotted of 5 unknowns in 2013 that didn’t match any known LA pod members.

marinerachel
marinerachel
6 years ago

I like that they’re swimming kinda crooked alongside their mom.

J pod actually outbred L pod 3:1 in 2009. Hopefully they get back into it. Maybe poor K pod will pop another baby in the next couple years.