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Of all the loopy manifestos that this whole #GamerGate fiasco has inspired, I think this loopy manifesto, posted several days ago to the Men’s Rights subreddit to a smattering of upvotes, is probably my favorite.
Take it away, trudatness:
Think about what really went down in gaming journalism – not on the micro level, but on the macro level.
The most left-wing journalism companies happily filled the gaming journalism void. Think about it…
The most virulent lavender menace feminist laced industry on the planet began covering an industry whose target audience was comprised of somewhat socially awkward young men.
Hey what could go wrong?
Answer: Everything.
Woah, hate to be a stickler for stuff that actually makes sense, but if you’re going to use a homophobic slur to describe your opponents, make sure you pick the correct homophobic slur. The phrase “lavender menace” originated as an insult aimed at lesbians in the feminist movement; the term was later reclaimed by lesbian feminists. Whether as as a slur or as an honorific, I’m pretty sure the term is not a terribly apt description of the dude-dominated world of video game journalism, as dudes cannot actually be lesbians.
The video game online journalism industry hates gamers. They made no bones about that fact when they coordinated a drop of nearly a dozen articles eulogizing the gamer.
Er, a eulogy is “a speech or writing in praise of a person or thing, especially a set oration in honor of a deceased person.” I think what you meant to say is that there were a bunch of articles proclaiming the death of the traditional self-described “gamer.” Most of these articles were not full of hate for games, or for people who play games, but only for self-proclaimed “gamers” who want gaming to be a preserve of adolescent (and overgrown adolescent) dudes.
If you hate gamers, then why cover gaming?
Answer: There’s only so much money you can make covering gay pride parades.
Not true. It’s a little known historical fact that John D. Rockefeller Sr. made his fortune covering gay pride parades.
Wait, I am being told that John D. Rockefeller Sr. actually made his fortune by founding Standard Oil, and that there weren’t actually any gay pride parades anywhere until decades after he died.
I need to stop getting all my information from IncorrectGayOPedia.
So these twisted totalitarianists decided they were going to take an industry – a humble hobbyist collective that had grown into a billion dollar industry – and simply evict the current tenants with bullying, shaming and sexual coercion. They were going to move in, via takeover, bringing all their talentless cronies in with them.
THE LAVENDER TOTALITARIANISTS ARE COMING FOR YOUR GAMES!!
What better way to deal with the gamers you hate, by shaming them into subservience? These 3rd wavers wanted to co-opt gaming and turn it into their vehicle of propaganda, dictating to designers what is to be produced.
Apparently mentioning that many games contain sexist elements is the same as ordering designers to replace Call of Duty: Black Ops with Call of Duty: Kill All Men.
Who the fuck do these people think they are? They truly intended to force gaming hobbyists into kowtowing and accepting their dogmas.
This is what feminism does.
It’s true. Feminism has always been about fucking with hobbyists. Who can forget Mary Wollstonecraft’s famous A Vindication of the Rights of Women to Force Dudes to Play Sissy Facebook Games Like,You Know, Farmville or Some Shit?
Egalitarianism? Hardly? More like Machiavellianism. They want to control the masses and superimpose their value system onto people by force.
That’s right: Anita Sarkeesian has actually been using her Kickstarter money to fund the training of an elite core of feminist commandos who will soon be dispatched to mother’s basements across the nation to pry copies of Grand Theft Auto V from the hands of true gaming heroes.
They cannot let the truth of their message speak for itself.
Hard to do when all you do is front out lies. …
Look at the so-called game reviews… They aren’t game reviews. They are social justice critiques. Does the game get the feminist lavender menace seal of SJW approval?
I would actually love to see a Feminist Lavender Menace Seal of SJW Approval. Could someone draw me one?
Tsk, tsk, tsk… Those women have too big of boobs… Not enough “realistic woman” protagonists… That’s Sexist!
Pretty soon all games are going to require that all game characters are lesbian or trans-gendered and run around fighting the patriarchy or some dumb shit like that.
Yep. Soon all red-blooded young men will be forced to play all games as Lesbian Lara Croft.
Do you want to kill some zombies or get lost in an RPG fantasy? Play a little PvP? I hope you like tumblr-style fat-acceptance friendly avatars.
Make that FAT Lesbian Lara Croft.
This is the twisted fucking world they live in – and they want to make every single gamer out there accept their worldview.
It’s time for the tail to stop wagging the dog.
It’s time to full on evict SJWs from the gaming world.
Not if we sit on you first.
EDIT: Ok, ok, I fixed the terrible typo in the headline. But speaking of LAVENDER menaces, Leocigale has provided us with this wonderful Feminist Lavender Menace Seal of SJW Approval, which will now go in the sidebar. (There were several other excel
lent Seals of Approval submitted, but this one has an actual adorable seal it it!)
Is the jug maybe meant to be orange juice? I guess she could be craving it, since she’s pregnant and all.
I suspect it’s supposed to be milk and it was hastily cobbled up from some base model that was probably a fuel can or bleach bottle or something. I mean, it’s not like that pizza slice resembled any pizza slice I’ve seen…
Well, otoh, since she’s holding the pizza pepperoni side against her shirt she’s going to need the laundry detergent, so…
Was McTavish upthread spoofing what a gamer dudebro sounds like? It’s hard to tell. In any event, I read it with Charlie Sheen’s voice in my head.
Cementing your public image with non-gamers as violent sexist assholes who want to kneecap a woman you don’t even know for cheating on her boyfriend = winning?
Does this mean I need to give up my hobbies? Do I have to stop crafting? Give up my collections? GUIDE ME, FEMINIST OVERLORDS!
MacTavish is right about exactly one thing (and only one thing):
It is. Thanks to people like Anita Sarkeesian.
Shiraz: Either that or he posts from Bizarro world. O.o
And oooooh, we have TWO seals of approval.
Here’s a seal that approves of that:
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2012/01/12/article-2085835-0F6D781400000578-455_638x689.jpg
Gotta disagree with Reddit. I take more of a Jewish standpoint on virtuous behavior; even if virtuous behavior is compelled, it is still virtuous behavior. Otherwise, we’d never recognize fire fighters and such as heroes; after all, they’re just doing their job, right?
Hoooorseshit.
Since we’re already in the arctic, have a penguin too.
http://agelfeygelach.tumblr.com/post/90502825028/roachpatrol-tastefullyoffensive-science
I recognize the back of that jug as a brand of milk. Garelick Farms, maybe? AFAIK Hood has the square jugs (although the artist can’t draw skinney, snap top milk caps ><), but the main point dude-bro is going for is that in the US, red caps/border symbolizes whole fat milk instead of blue, green, or yellow, that symbolize 2%, 1%, or skim milk.
A woman eating pizza and drinking whole milk; truly a gamer apocalypse. Damn those women and their strong bones!
I can’t even see pregnant, she just looks inflated. Like she plugged a helium tank into her belly button.
LOL @ the gamebro here going, “You’re bullying us by not approving of us bullying [insert person/group].”
These guys are way beyond “you need to take your moral compass in for repairs” and into “just accept that it’s broken and get a new one”.
When MacTavish (who I naturally imagine as a red-faced shouty Scotsman in a kilt) says “The games industry is changing for the better”, what does he actually mean?
Because he sounds very much as though he’s representing the side of the argument that couldn’t be more fervently against any kind of change.
RE: Brittersweet
LOL @ the gamebro here going, “You’re bullying us by not approving of us bullying [insert person/group].”
Obviously, the true morally superior position is to never do anything and feel smug about your total inaction, because that way you can do no wrong! (And no right either for that matter, but ssssh. The universe is already perfect as it is; getting involved would ruin everything)
http://imgur.com/KptP9ki
Changing = moving backwards to just before women and POC started pointing out the problems with a lot of games, apparently.
@LBT: to be fair, that game DOES have a dubstep gun that lets you shoot things with the power of music. OMG SJW CONSPIRACY
@Wetherby: it makes sense if you think of it instead as “it could hardly get any worse”.
Nuking thefappening after a week just adds more evidence to the “never deletes shit unless it gets us bad press” heap.
Just like they haven’t touched the subreddit that replaced creepshots and the myriad of other ethically bankrupt shitholes they host.
Yeah, I mean is it any wonder I thought this was someone doing a gamebro impression?
They have the intellectual dishonesty down pat:
“The demands of the legions of gamers angry at the corruption of games journalism will be met.”
Yes, this is all about journalism. Wait, no it’s not. You guys have been spoonfed biased reviews for years. You’re only mobbing now because it gives you a reason to hate a woman.
But this part made me smile:
“The games industry is changing for the better…”
Because it is, but not in the way you think, duder. In fact, your kind will probably make these changes happen faster. There are other players out there who don’t belong to your demo, and companies want their money and interest too. Can’t risk alienating those potential consumers. Also, you give game a bad name. There are guys out there so fucking sick of assholes like you. And finally —
“… and we don’t care if we have to drag you assholes kicking and screaming to make it happen.”
Gaming has been catering to duders for a long time now, but poster never realized this? He thinks the industry can do better for sexist bros everywhere? What would be next? Firing every and any woman working in the industry then taking her out back to tar and feather?
I’m also amused by the idea that, say, Nintendo used to be a hobbyist collective rather than a profit-making corporation.
RE: leocigale
Welp, I know when I’m beaten.
A seal of approval that is actually a seal.