An open thread for personal stuff, continuing from here.
As usual for these threads: no trolls, no MRAs, no I’m-not-really-an-MRA-buts, don’t be mean.
Categories
We Hunted The MammothBucking the Backlash
We Hunted The Mammoth
@blahlistic, thanks 🙂 I still count her as my best friend and we talk about everything else, so tbh I don’t feel like I’ve lost a lot. It feels like it must be more painful to have to ignore and push away sexual feelings all the time.
Khittehserf: Once I knew what was going on, I was more relived than anything. My reproductive system had done nothing but make me miserable for two thirds of my life, surgical menopause was not likely to be worse. Plus, I had a robot assisted procedure and that was just cool as hell. NephewB was very impressed and asked if the robot has a chain sword and elbow rockets like Gypsy Danger in Pacific Rim. (love that movie to death, but they could have come up with a call sign without an ethnic slur!) He was disappointed to learn that the da vinci system can’t multi-task.
Kathleen: Hooray for being free of the reproductive system that was causing you so much trouble! And thank God you got doctors who were actually willing to do it and weren’t all “but you must protect your reproductive ability at all costs.”
katz- REALLY OMG SQUEEEEEE that just makes me happy. I’ll probably start off volunteering (if they do that) before thinking about fostering. I would have to have a big discussion about it with the husband. But I definitely would love to join. Thank you!
So glad you go the treatment you need Kath, I had a constant headache for about a year, it was miserable. Definitely nowhere near that though.
Katz: The hormones (Provera) that are the normal treatment for hyperplasia turned me into a stereotypical PMS monster. MrB didn’t want to be around me, the cats didn’t want to be around me, I didn’t want to be around me. Given the risk of leaving it be, and the fact that I had made it clear that kids were not an option, the only thing they could do was the hysterectomy. Being 36 and visibly freaking out at the thought of being pregnant probably didn’t hurt though.
I found this on the web and I didn’t know where to post it, so maybe this thread is the right onw. I hope the kitty-lovers will find inspiration!
http://www.earthporm.com/25-awesome-furniture-design-ideas-cat-lovers/
Adorable. I especially love that desk. The idea of sitting at a desk and reaching down and finding a kitty just seems like the best discovery ever. That and maybe the cat won’t be on the keyboard. 😛
dorabella, so much SQUEEEE for that cat furniture!
I can see I’m going to have to casually show these to Mr K next time he has the urge to do some carpentery.
Congrats on feeling good again KathleenB! I know I felt only total relief and joy when it was confirmed I’d had a (really) early menopause. Some men don’t understand it, but since it doesn’t affect them..tough 🙂
Is it normal to hear music ? I mean the one time it was blatant I knew I was bad, but…hearing it now.
Testing new gravatar.
Dammit.
And now it’s working. Yay!
Ooh! Nice gravatar!
I have to agree, that’s a great gravitar.
Welp, I did it. The letter’s been sent off. Dunno what our granny will do, but I can bet safe money on our parents being utterly furious. I’m just tired of holding all the family secrets and never discussing anything that happened while we were in their care. Let them be angry; fuck them all.
RE: relationships
Since our early life was so heavily dominated by rape, I fully intended on being single and celibate my entire life. Mac just happened to be so awesome I recanted my stance, for him and him only.
Now, Miranda and Falcon are the only sexual system members still single, and neither of them front much. Falcon would likely be utterly repulsed and horrified at the idea, while Miranda has stated that it’s not worth the logistical effort. For her to date someone corporeal would require a full system agreement, fronting roster shift, a lot of tests… very few people are worth that effort from the get-go, and very few people are willing to put up with that.
I actually take a perverse pleasure in knowing that I will likely never have to deal with another romantic or sexual relationship again. They are so irrevocably intertwined with rape for me that it feels protective and loving to say no to that shit. Also, to be blunt: we’re undatable. Mir and me are both monogamous, but our tastes are such that I can’t IMAGINE us being able to agree on and share a corporeal partner. (And that would violate our monogamy as well!) Also, our vessel is visibly trans, which instantly axes us from a lot of people’s dating pool.
(Eesh. I sound really negative about relationships here. I love my husband, and I love the relationship I have with him. But seriously now. He is the only person I’ve ever seen as worth the sheer effort.)
LBT – Congrats on getting the letter out takes a lot of chutzpah to actually put that sort of thing into action. 🙂
LBT, yeah, even without all the horrible things done to you, trying for relationships with outer people when you’ve only one vessel to use – gah, no, I’d be with Miranda on that one too.
Kudos on sending the letter!
seraph, that’s a gorgeous gravatar indeed.
gilshalos, hearing music? As in hearing it physically though nothing’s playing, or having an earworm?
Aitch, thanks for asking about the job interview. I’m afraid I don’t feel very good about it at all. Having had just found out I didn’t get the other job the day before, in what I thought was a strangely sterile and unfriendly manner from the institution I already work for, I don’t think I was able to overcome feeling demoralized and, er, un-confident. Those are not helpful things to be feeling if you want to do well in an interview. Tried to keep anxiety at bay but it attacked me once I walked into the interview room and I know it was obvious.
Anyway, I haven’t heard back yet but I’m not optimistic. There’s no other life situation I am so different from my usual self than in an interview, which kind of ends up defeating the whole purpose. Maybe I need to look into anxiety meds. I have such a involuntary physical response to feeling anxiety and it affects the way I talk and answer questions.
But I did have a great day doing my actual (subbing) job today. So tonight I feel heaps better, at least for now.
@ LBT….in passing you mentioned the cousin who fell from grace and became pregnant at a young age…Um…Have you ever been in touch with her?
Glad you’re feeling better, Kathleen, and crossing my fingers for granny’s reception of LBT’s letter. Hugs offered to all who want them.
I love the cat furniture. I wonder if my actual cat would like any of it.
Auditory hallucinations aren’t exactly a common experience. However, I note that you are aware that the music is being played inside your head and not your actual environment.
I started having those again for a brief time in 2008. The original time was when I was 6 and a lot of Bad Stuff was happening.
Anyway, I thought about it, and then started directing the hallucination. It’s coming from inside my head, right? This was upon waking, so for 20-some odd minutes I was lying there, pleasantly directing and listening to KLSD radio.
(your ALL HALLUCINATION STATION!)
More hugs to anyone who wants ’em!
@grumpycat, Sorry you weren’t very happy with the 2nd interview. Anxiety is one of those things our jerkbrains do to us sometimes. I don’t know if your institution is like mine, but sometimes the sterile/unfriendly vibe comes from HR trying to make sure they don’t give any unsuccessful candidates ammunition to claim unfairness or discrimination. Our HR won’t even let us talk to candidates after the interviews; we have to refer all other communications to HR people who’ve never even met them. I worry that it comes across as unfriendly to people that we really liked, even if we hired someone else because they had more relevant experience or whatever.
Also, keep in mind that they probably wouldn’t have even interviewed you if you didn’t look like a strong candidate, which actually says something pretty good about you. You’re good enough to get an interview, and eventually you’re going to find a match and get paid to be an awesome person full-time.
If you don’t mind sharing your email address, I can put you in touch with her.