I don’t usually bother to read the comments on Chateau Heartiste; making it through Heartiste’s own florid yet turgid prose is exhausting enough. But after skimming a recent post of his on the increasing historical fatness of British women, I happened to glance down at the comments, only to see a discussion of the comparative anatomy of female humans and deer that was so odd and creepy I felt obligated to bring it to you all.
Brace yourself, because the following might just ruin your breakfast:
Ewwwwww.
I’m pretty sure that guy’s hunting license should be taken away from him. And if there were sex licenses for human beings, well, all three of these guys should lose those as well.
Yeah, 19 inches seems super tiny. When I was a skinny 110 lb size 2 14 year old my waist was 24 inches.
L Frank Baum’s stories were a response to how violent and creepy fairy tales were. He wanted to tell kid’s stories that had the wonder and adventure but without the darkness.
I call BS on the 18″ and 19″ waists.
Here are children’s waist sizes from a clothing store: http://www.childrenssizechart.com/ Note the waist sizes for 3 months and 6 months.
Here is an accessible PDF from the CDC, you want Table 18 (p.22): http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/series/sr_11/sr11_252.pdf I did the conversion from inches to cm, 19 inches is 48.26cm. According to that table, the mean waist measurement for 3 year old girls is larger than 19″/48.26cm.
So BS on the the grandmother and mother waist sizes being healthy or typical.
NEVER HAS THE “EMPLOYEES MUST WASH HANDS BEFORE RETURNING TO WORK” POLICY HAD SUCH POWERFUL RESONANCE.
Seconded, pallygirl. That size waist isn’t achievable without a lot of dedicated training and a willingness to alter your ribcage and funnel your internal organs elsewhere.
https://thepragmaticcostumer.wordpress.com/tag/little-house-on-the-prairie/
Even my skinny two-year-olds, who can’t keep 2T pants from falling down, have 18″ waists.
You know, admitting that you’re into bestiality isn’t really the most effective way to prove your alpha-ness or make the ladies sad that you have forsaken us.
Dude. Don’t just cut and paste the description that you got off the back of your favorite porn video into internet comments sections, that’s creepy AND uncreative.
Bigger boobs make more milk. It are a biological fact.
Luckily, I’ve never been a breakfast guy, unless you count coffee and doughnuts.
Still, that dude’s description of accidentally slipping his finger into a deer’s vagina somehow struck me perversely funny, in the same way as watching an old Ed Wood movie on MST3K.
No doubt these clowns consider any woman whose ribcage isn’t clearly visible — that is, not Gwyneth Paltrow — to be a “fat chick”. I blame Hollywood, at least partially.
I like big butts because misandric government programs forced my college to fund the women’s lacrosse team? MRAs are weird, y’all.
How do you get to make a boppy pop song from that line, @cassandra? Because misandric is the only part that fits the tempo of the next line.
Fun fact: It’s actually possible (although you have to perform fairly specialized exercises) to make your waist bigger through physical exercise. If you pump up the normally tiny muscles at the side of your waist, an initially tiny waist will become wider. Mine used to be more narrow when I was out of shape.
Indeed. And hopefully they have the nice chloroxylenol soap there to cover the smell… X.X
Wow, Two things to note, The first one just how funny it is to see someone admit they are a aroused by fingering a deer. Two, the stupidity of a MRA who makes his live off of woman, who spend there “husbands money”. Doesn’t that make ourdeer lover the equivalent of at tobacco executive in MRM land?
QFT, Karak! I actively don’t want men, or women for that matter, finding me attractive. Skeeves me the hell out.
I’m of the Shit That Never Happened school of thought on prevailtolegend’s deer-groping claim. I’m betting he didn’t quite dare, even on the House of Fartiste, to say he fantasises about fucking dead animals.
Out here I’d say he works for RetraVision or JB HiFi.
Which might explain why one went bust and the other’s on the way.
@Cassie’s Major Domo
You should read Bee Maja. It’s hilariously old fashioned and the Wasps are basically stereotypical Hussars.
Is that the same thing as Maya the Bee (which I just looked up now)? It does sound interesting. I have close relatives with little kids who live in Germany, I should ask them if they know about it.
That persons grandmother was Scarlett O’Hara fer sure!
Objectively skinny lady here, and I can’t even get my waist under 24 inches without sucking in my gut and pulling the measuring tape ridiculously tight. 18/19 inches? Not possible for most full grown women, and most likely not at all healthy when it is possible. Those are practically CLAMP-sized waists.
That is what corsets are for. To disfigure our body so men will admire it.
It puts me through PHYSICAL pain to have to see them fuck up both biology AND history. I bet they also believe packaged, sugar coated sweets were available in the 12th century. And the beauty standards then are the same as they are now. And Europe never had famines or disease. It was a tit paradise, ya’ll. Because, science/history.
Also, Guinness record for smallest waist is 15 inches CORSETED.
Well, that was layers of disturbing upon layers of disturbing.
‘Sex licences’, hah!! Good plan, David; can we get the ball rolling on that one? Love your work, as always.
My waist was 24 inches when I was a scrawny little 13-year-old who ate all the food, wasn’t eating-disordered, and still couldn’t gain weight. Coincidentally, that was the same year I read all those Little House books and learned about the torture that is corsetry. Calling BS at the top of my lungs on the wife/grandma story.
Also, just thought I should say that I cleaned the cat litter box a few minutes ago. Fishing poop nuggets out of there was less repulsive by far than reading these guys’ maunderings about how far short the average real-life woman falls of some stupid, arbitrary ideal. If I make THEIR boners sad, then that’s more than all right with me. Last thing I need is some leering creeper from the housewares department at Crappy Tire making doe eyes at me.
From what I’ve read, the stepmothers in the fairy tales were based on a historical fact. So many women died in childbirth that widowers remarrying was more common than it is today. The stepmothers knew that the children from the first marriage would feel no obligation towards them if the father died, so having (and favoring) their own children was a survival tactic.
Hence the description of second marriages representing the triumph of hope over experience – it had nothing to do with divorce.