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D'oh! A deer, a female deer

I don't even ... what?
I don’t even … what?

I don’t usually bother to read the comments on Chateau Heartiste; making it through Heartiste’s own florid yet turgid prose is exhausting enough. But after skimming a recent post of his on the increasing historical fatness of British women, I happened to glance down at the comments, only to see a discussion of the comparative anatomy of female humans and deer that was so odd and creepy I felt obligated to bring it to you all.

Brace yourself, because the following might just ruin your breakfast:

 

FuriousFerret  Well at least tits are bigger now. That’s one silver lining.      on August 26, 2014 at 12:12 pm | Reply CH      not even. big tits on fat women aren’t attractive. they hang like deerskin fur canteen bladders and are about as flat.          on August 26, 2014 at 12:20 pm prevailtolegend          One time I was skinning a doe deer in the field and when cutting out the rectum and thus the entrails, my finger accidentally slipped into the vagina. I sell home consumer goods and there are women I encounter every day, spending their husbands money, that are so large they would have me less aroused.

Ewwwwww.

I’m pretty sure that guy’s hunting license should be taken away from him. And if there were sex licenses for human beings, well, all three of these guys should lose those as well.

 

 

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Arctic Ape
Arctic Ape
6 years ago

tl’dr = Too long, didn’t read.
Get it? Teal deer.

It took me ages to get this.

Not being a native English-speaker, I used to assume that “teal” was an obscure word meaning something like “butthurt” and “deer” would be derived from condescending “dear”. So teal deer would be kinda like drama llama.

kittehserf
6 years ago

Vaginal flora makes me think there are flowers lurking in there.

Prolly just as well they’re not, I don’t imagine the vagina dentata is herbivorous.

Fibinachi
6 years ago

So Dr Greg, does fucking a dead deer qualify as exercise?

You know, I admit to being a bit confused.

They didn’t exactly seem to have run out of horses, I guess.

kittehserf
6 years ago

Fibi, I don’t even dare ask what that means!

::hides under desk::

sunnysombrera
6 years ago

Kitteh: brings new meaning to the term deflowered? I should investigate the origins of that word in its context. Probably comes from Shakespeare, almost everything does.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
6 years ago

Some flowers have thorns. Ouch.

sunnysombrera
6 years ago

According to the Grammarphobia blog, to deflower in the sense of taking a woman’s virginity was used as far back as 1300, way before Shakespeare. Back then “flower” meant “virginity” as well as actual flowers, and since women were prized for their virginity, it makes sense that to take it meant taking her “beauty” from her, like you would if you stripped a flower bush of blossoms.

Mind you to deflower also meant to violate, so I’m not sure If the original meaning actually meant “to rape a virgin”.

http://www.grammarphobia.com/blog/2009/12/deflower-child.html

DJG
DJG
6 years ago

@redpoppy – I protest the attempt to claim bridge, but canasta might work.

Misha
Misha
6 years ago

@Arctic Ape – :), describes the spiels produced by Mens Righsters to a tee:

“There they go, being drama llamas again”.

Alex
6 years ago

I’m just going to go ahead and assume Greg’s another Pell until proven otherwise. Hi, Dr. Pell.

seraph4377
6 years ago

@ Arctic Ape – teal is a real word. It’s a shade of blue-green.

opium4themasses
opium4themasses
6 years ago

Telling people weight-loss is all just thermodynamics is about as useful as telling a kid they can pitch for the majors by throwing the ball fast. At best it is an over-simplification and at worst may lead to counterproductive or damaging behaviors.

Also, people drop that nugget like it is the only information a fat person needed to get started. Thanks for the patronization, ass. I know you probably mean well, but intent ain’t magic. Would you tell an asthmatic they just need to use their willpower to breathe better?

In my last weight-loss attempt, I dropped 160lbs. To be clear, I lost as much weight as some people weigh. It took concerted effort to make it easier to make the right food choices. What did me in was over-exercising and unemployment related depression. I was riding my bike 70 miles each week for work and errands. I was eating 3000 calories a day without gaining weight. When I lost my job, I lost my will and need to ride those miles. My body still expected a higher caloric intake though and I fell back into bad habits.

Lectures and advice on weight-loss act like people are clueless. Please stop treating patients and advice seekers without respect for their exists ng knowledge.

Also, the worst thing I noticed about losing that much weight is it dropped the blinders I had up about the difference in how people treat others based on weight. People would come up to congratulate me on my efforts, but some of them seemed to be unable to do so without revealing how poorly they thought of me before I lost weight. The doctor I was seeing as part of my weight-loss even told me “You look human now.”. He meant that as a compliment. So my opinions on the usefulness of medical opinion on the actual effort involved in losing weight is about a inch up from fuck all.

Karalora
6 years ago

A teal is also a kind of duck. The color was named after the duck, which has blue-green feathers on part of its head.

AL3H
AL3H
6 years ago

@ Arctic Ape

To be completely honest, I also didn’t know what tl;dr or teal deer was and thought the second one was some sort of venison tender meat reference (possibly from a book). 😛

In addition to meaning green, “teal” is also a bird that looks a bit like a duck.

Completely off topic, at my uni accommodation we had this ~20cm tall duck that was grumpy and use to chase people around the carpark. I remember was a bit distracted and I tried to go to uni one day and this duck was outside my door and chased me back into the flat. 😛

So if you change “butthurt” to “anklehurt” then its actually a pretty good description. 🙂

emilygoddess - MOD
emilygoddess - MOD
6 years ago

DrMrsTheMonarch, I approve of your nym and fandom choices <3

This is the sort of thing that causes me to wonder if the MRA world is full of deep cover trolls, who post the most outrageous and disturbed “I am a serial killer waiting to happen!” red flags to see if anybody notices.

I’ve thought about doing this just to see what I can get them to agree with, but it would require me to actually spend time on and read MRA sites.

anecdotes of mistakenly feeling up deer genitalia

I’m not convinced it was accidental.

I’m not convinced it was his finger. Heyooooooo! (Sorry)

So Dr Greg, does fucking a dead deer qualify as exercise?

I LOL’d.

Vaginal flora makes me think there are flowers lurking in there.

Prolly just as well they’re not, I don’t imagine the vagina dentata is herbivorous.

LOL. Now I’m picturing a lush, colorful jungle, in which lurks a carnivorous tooth-monster hunting its phallic prey. I like it 🙂

Can we talk abotut the irony of Greg posting his full name, medical license and practice name around the same time Anita Sarkeesian was being harassed out of her home and probably hundreds of women looking on were double- and triple-checking that they had no identifying information online? This is what we mean when we sar male privilege isn’t an accusation, it’s just a statement of differences in experience. Greg knows he has nothing to fear from posting all that information in one place; women know we would risk our safety and sanity if we did the same thing.

Michelle C Young
6 years ago

@Kim – I’ve never been to Vegas, so I wouldn’t know how to write that underwater. Although I’ve seen movies, so I guess that’s all the research I need!

Where’s that sarcasm tag?

But truly, if I write it, I’ll make it up to be whatever suits the story.

@contrapanglass – OH, yes! I love knowing that these hateful bigots won’t waste my time. I don’t really date, but at least I know that when a fellow flirts with me, it’s with ME, not with “HB10.” It takes time and effort to come to terms with your body, but that’s a definite selling point. Also, I LOVE my short hair. I cut it off because it hurt too much to maintain it (thanks to my car accident – all the raising of the arms – OUCH), so short hair was practical. Now, I just love it, anyway. Time for another haircut, actually. It’s almost three whole inches long!

@Greg – This is NOT a weight-loss site. Those are in abundance elsewhere, and if we want to see it, all we have to do is go there. Many of them are in our faces with pop-ups and side-banner ads, anyway. Secondly, fat-shaming is a feminist issue. Don’t do it. Thirdly, if you aren’t aware of the concept of food deserts, especially in poor urban areas, please do look it up. It’s really hard to be thin when all you can afford are ramen noodles. And it’s really hard to get nutrition when you have money, but no actual physical access to fresh produce.

Also, weight-loss talk can be very triggering for people. As said above – children can be cruel. So can adults. Lots of us have been downright ABUSED because we weren’t “fit.” And a lot more females than males, actually. Males are judged on a less stringent physical standard. For example, the kerfuffle recently about the Irish opera singer. She was beautiful and talented and “overweight,” and therefor many (male) critics focused on her appearance and didn’t care about her singing. Some commenters even came right out and said that for males, weight and appearance did not matter, but for females, weight and appearance were ALL that mattered. It’s a feminist issue. And since 95% of dieters can’t keep the weight off for 5 whole years, let alone a lifetime, it’s a vital issue to learn to be accepting of people at all sizes, rather than insist they have to torture themselves for their ENTIRE LIVES, in a vain attempt to change themselves to please the bullies, rather than just teach the bullies not to be so darned bullying.

Yeah, I’m fat, so this hits home. And it’s also the whole reason for the original post. We started mocking the comment in Heartist’s post about fat women. Let’s stick with the point, please. Misogyny.

Michelle C Young
6 years ago

@weirwoodtreehugger – I always hated lentils, until my sister taught me the trick. Cook them with celery, and that makes the flavor pop! Also, if possible, include some yummy sausage in the meal, for even better flavor.

Wait, what do you mean, the sausage defeats the purpose? Lentils are yummy, when properly prepared and presented. THAT is the purpose.

Bina
Bina
6 years ago

I heard of a theory that the Venus of Willendorf might have actually been made by a woman as a self-portrait. If you view the statue from the top down rather than from the front, it looks the same as if a woman looked down toward her own feet. Keep in mind there were no mirrors at the time.

That’s an intriguing theory, although the simple fact of seeing other women in normal, face-on perspective would make it unlikely. It makes me wonder how isolated one would have to be in order to believe that she really looked like this. Plus, bodies of still water are the original mirrors. And we don’t all go around constantly looking at ourselves from the standing position, from a foreshortened head-to-toe perspective. Sometimes we sit, or lie down, in which case our shape is different again. Suddenly, we have legs and feet! And we’re not all boobs/belly/hips/thighs, with tiny shrunken arms.

It really IS hard to say what the sculptor’s intent was, though, without written records of any kind to identify the person and their desires. At best, all we’ve got are educated guesses.

Fibinachi
6 years ago

Fibi, I don’t even dare ask what that means!

::hides under desk::

Nothing obscene, really. I was thinking along the lines of “fucking a dead horse”, since, y’know, beating a dead horse is an idiom.
——–

Most of the developed world does have an obesity problem. An obesity problem. It’s an issue with both men and women. More exercise is needed…

But Doctor,

It’s not about calories in/calories out – it’s about what the calories are made out of. 200 calories of a soft drink vs 200 calories of a salad are incomparable when it comes to the diversity of vitamins and nutrients. P.S – Soda’s have none, all the calories are basically glucose. Worthless.

Dear Doctor,

Young people, until recently, had virtually zero nutritional education except for the “food pyramid” which promoted bleached grains (white breads) as the most nutritional foods to consume. That is one of the reasons a generation or two has become so corpulent so fast.

Oh Doctor!

You’re eating healthy. That’s what matters at the end of the day. But, regardless of what a person eats… Humans need exercise.

Allow me to say:

You’re somewhat off base with the claim that you make
Given that exercise won’t help ameliorate
a state of affairs where your intake
of food is restricted to supermarket fare
or perhaps fast food, if you care
For that sort of stuff

You can run quite a lot
but it won’t be enough

Obesity is not a lack of running ’bout
Kids these days don’t sit down when they should strout and shout
The food structure has changed, and the intake too
the take-away is that the choices available to you
won’t leave much in the way of abdominal muscles
just endless tussles
with the number you’re asked to mark

Which, in itself, is off the mark

“Weight” is not the the mathematical answer to a nominal problem
Individual variance is a physiological fact
but what is that?
Is it the adipose tissue with which we have issue?
Did I just binge drink three liters of stuff, and that’s now enough
to change my fluid balance and push it over the cuff
( Rendering me unable to strut my stuff )

People rage against carbohydrates and sitting too still
thinking squatting around leads to too many ills
Yet popping a pill
Another medical measure
Often leads to weight gain
A point few people treasure

I could be genetically pre-diposed
to having six toes
a shock of ginger hair, a cross eyed stare
three loci twists in my genetic structure
an allele, mutation or minor restructure
ends up with 30 extra pounds over ten years
scary stuff
but fucking Heartiste will claim I don’t fucking crossfit to an eligible standard
for boner pleasing
I apologize
But coming up with a rhyme that fits the sceme and matches a gene
is difficult
with geneologists continue the trend
of naming their markers ten digit phrases
They should think more of the rhyming fools on the internet
who must touch their bases to work into a sentence with some semblance of order

Anyhow, for an Doctor whoose credentials I don’t wanna doubt
I find it highly suspect eventual differences
in metrics more bearing on health
Like the wealth of triglycerides in your blood
the pressure of same
a short notation of available literature on the influence of insulin?
Is neither mentioned nor expected to have an implicit bearing on
my otherwise fantastic health?

Nah! Give me a number, some sort of easy scale
perhaps a number derived from a scale
and I shall tell you
Without a doubt
If you’re fuckablehealthy and attractivewell

Oh sure! “Run a bit more” is good advice, if you’re dis-inclined to think twice
about the nature of health
But unless people ask
don’t take them to ask
about the percentages of tissue their bodies have
it’s not nice
and frankly, it’s less a spice of life
than just laughing at fools who sometimes fuck deer
and rage against all people hold dear

weirwoodtreehugger
6 years ago

if you aren’t aware of the concept of food deserts, especially in poor urban areas, please do look it up. It’s really hard to be thin when all you can afford are ramen noodles. And it’s really hard to get nutrition when you have money, but no actual physical access to fresh produce.

Doctors are very privileged economically and often do not understand this concept. Cooking nutritious meals also requires having a decent sized kitchen stocked with the right cookware. As far as exercise goes, not everyone can afford a gym membership and some neighborhoods aren’t safe enough to easily go on walks and runs. Both in terms of crime and asthma inducing environmental pollutants. Even running, which is theoretically free to do outside requires a sports bra, exercise clothes and good shoes. A lot of people are really willfully blind to the fact that it takes some privilege to have a healthy lifestyle.

deniseeliza
deniseeliza
6 years ago

A funny thing about “health” – fat people are lectured all the time about their “health”, as if health is the most important thing about a person, and that a person must be doing everything in their power to increase their health.

And then we turn around and idolize professional and Olympic level athletes, many of whom are engaging in extremely dangerous activities, regularly getting injured, and often retire at a young age with permanent physical damage. If their sport doesn’t literally kill them.

seraph4377
6 years ago

@ karalora – I did not know that. Thank you.

Michelle C Young
6 years ago

I really do enjoy knitting. I have to be careful, though, because of my shoulders, but it’s fun!

Contrapangloss, may I suggest that you start with wash cloths and tea towels? Baby bibs are also quite good for starters. They are fast and you get to actually finish before your fingers fall off.

Michelle C Young
6 years ago

@kitteh – I love the cane and the moth! Thanks for sharing!

Michelle C Young
6 years ago

@Noadi

Many, many medications, not just birth control, have weight gain as a side effect.

For some reason, I read that as, “have weight gain as a snide effect.” Made me laugh! Thanks!

Speaking of making me laugh, my sister has just coined the phrase, “As awesome as a colonoscopy.” Of course, she means that something is seriously awesome. You see, a few weeks ago, when my sister was in the hospital, my nephew was at our house, and we explained about his aunt Slappy (we don’t use her real name online) being in the hospital. “She’s getting a colonoscopy right now.”

“What’s that?”

“Well, basically, a colonoscopy is when they stick a camera up your butt.”

His eyes got really big, and he grinned, and shouted, “THAT IS AWESOME!”

So, now, whenever anything is really great, it’s “As awesome as a colonoscopy.”

The test where they run the camera down your throat, on the other hand, was not so awesome. “You could choke!”

Isn’t medicine fun?!

Also, I love my family.

So, I’ve never posted a pic here before, and I’m going to try. This is my kitten, Mittens.

http://i1.wp.com/scontent-a.cdninstagram.com/hphotos-xaf1/t51.2885-15/10617189_317271111786040_1756427501_n.jpg?w=512

Did that work? If not, it’s posted at my sister’s website. http://poppycockpublishing.com/tammyjrizzo/of-course-im-comfy-dont-i-look-comfy-you-think-id-be-like-this-if-it-wasnt-comfy-silly-human/

Michelle C Young
6 years ago

Yay! It worked! Now, to go track down the kitten, and take more pictures. Assuming she’s not hiding. She likes to hide.

strivingally
6 years ago

Can we talk abotut the irony of Greg posting his full name, medical license and practice name around the same time Anita Sarkeesian was being harassed out of her home and probably hundreds of women looking on were double- and triple-checking that they had no identifying information online? This is what we mean when we sar male privilege isn’t an accusation, it’s just a statement of differences in experience. Greg knows he has nothing to fear from posting all that information in one place; women know we would risk our safety and sanity if we did the same thing.

So much this. I am very much in the minority as a privileged guy who has taken great care to separate this nym from any identifying info, and even then that’s more because of employment-related reasons than any threat to personal safety. I’m also aware that even if I did post my name, address, phone number and upload a photo, the level of abuse I would receive would be NOWHERE NEAR the amount a woman in my position would be subjected to (and quite frankly concern for my partner becoming a target is another reason why I’ve tried to separate this ID from my real name). It’s an eye-opening experience having to check all your posts from several years to see if you’ve accidentally let slip more than you want the world to know – eye-opening for me, anyway. I know those more vulnerable don’t find that shit optional.

Michelle C Young
6 years ago

Re: unwanted side effects.

I actually had headache medication that listed *headaches* as a side effect.

Ummm…

As for fertility as part of the “SMV,” I don’t get it. These guys are going their own way, and don’t want to be saddled with kids, right? Don’t they keep saying that? Pregnancy is just women’s way to trap men, and the courts will make you pay through the nose for the rest of your life, and all that jazz, and you’d best get a vasectomy, blah, blah. So, who cares if the woman is fertile?

Fertility is only important if you A) want to have children, and B) oppose adoption.

Of course, I believe most MRA’s also oppose adoption, because the only children worth raising are the ones that share their “f***ing liquid gold” semen. I mean, genetics.

Michelle C Young
6 years ago

@redpoppy

Seriously, who the fuck “accidentally” fingers the carcass of a dead deer?

Someone who actually admits to it, online? AND finds something symbolic about the eeeevul wimmenz in it, too.

Michelle C Young
6 years ago

Oh, btw, by “oppose adoption” I meant FOR YOURSELF. Lots of people are in favor of adoption, but because reasons are opposed to it within their own families.

Sometimes, those reasons are even valid. For instance, if the rest of the family treat adopted children like dirt, and they would rather live childless than expose any more poor children to that sort of treatment. That’s a very valid, albeit painful, reason to refuse adoption.

Also, adoption can be very difficult to achieve, because of the draconian rules, such as you must be young and “healthy,” and what not. Or you may be able to afford to raise a child, but not afford to actually pay all the exorbitant adoption fees.

So, tl;dr – “oppose adoption” was a poor choice of words. Sorry about that.

Should be “can’t/won’t adopt for whatever reason.”

Michelle C Young
6 years ago

KathleenB – I’m glad the surgery went well for you, and I wish you a full and uncomplicated recovery.

Michelle C Young
6 years ago

@Bittersweet – LOL! Are those kittens sedated? They are so calm!

OK, as soon as I can figure it out, I will get video of my kitten watching the automatic litter-box. Or maybe I’ll just ask my sister to do it. She already knows how.

My kitten just loves the litter-box show.

Michelle C Young
6 years ago

@opium4themasses

“You look human now.”

HUMAN!?!?!?!

I am shocked, but not at the fact of his hate-filled rudeness. Just the shock one feels when a known bully actually punches one in the gut. The punch shocks, physically, even if you’re expecting it.

Also, RAGE!

Did this doctor also ask advice columnists questions like, “How do I tell (X person) they are fat?” Because, you know, fat people are so clueless they don’t even KNOW that they are fat, and but live in a complete delusion of being tiny and thin.

Might as well ask, “How do I tell Michelle that she’s short?” Because, years of jumping to reach the cups in the cabinet were all in my imagination. I never KNEW, I tell you!

Michelle C Young
6 years ago

@emilygoddess

Can we talk abotut the irony of Greg posting his full name, medical license and practice name around the same time Anita Sarkeesian was being harassed out of her home and probably hundreds of women looking on were double- and triple-checking that they had no identifying information online? This is what we mean when we sar male privilege isn’t an accusation, it’s just a statement of differences in experience. Greg knows he has nothing to fear from posting all that information in one place; women know we would risk our safety and sanity if we did the same thing.

THIS!!!!

Anita Sarkeesian AND her parents! Because it’s not enough to just go after the woman who calls out problems in your games, but to go after the people who brought her into this world, as well.

It occurs to me that it’s entirely possible that they got that information simply by googling her father, and finding out that he had, confident that no one would dox HIM, posted his info online.

When I decided to use my real name online, I made the decision quite carefully. And, yes, I know the risks. And no, I don’t put my address out there. And there’s a reason that one of my sisters is always referred to as “Slappy.”

Greg, if you’re real (someone thought you might be a sock puppet for someone named Pell), then you are either very brave, or very naive. I’m hoping brave. Still, your privilege allows you to have a lower risk, even in your bravery.

Michelle C Young
6 years ago

@Fibinachi – Great poem! I loved it!

Robert
Robert
6 years ago

Regarding bridge, reading the bridge column in the newspaper helps me understand what D&D sounds like to non-players. At this rate, I’ll probably teach myself to knit before I learn to play bridge.
My younger son was visibly fat for several years, as a result of the psychiatric medications he was taking. Then puberty happened, he grew about six inches and now looks somatotypical*. When I had the same kind of growth spurt at the same age, I developed Osgood Schlatter syndrome and couldn’t move faster than a walk for a year. I was excused from running in middle school P.E., and got to walk the track with the other two official Weird Boys. Curiously, I eventually got so into running that I joined the high school track and cross country teams.

*I don’t know if this is a word, but it seems to work.

opium4themasses
opium4themasses
6 years ago

@Michelle The worst part is that he was trying to compliment me. He prefaced it by saying “This is going to sound awful, but…”. That was hardly the only time someone insulted what I had been to compliment what I was then. This was just the most egregious one.

Michelle C Young
6 years ago

@opium4themasses

There’s a reason why etiquette mavens say to avoid complimenting people. It too frequently comes out wrong. Especially if you are complimenting their appearance.

Miss Manners recommends, “Don’t you look well?”

Of course, if the person has lost a lot of weight due to meds, chemotherapy, being unable to keep down anything but crackers and water, terminal illness, etc., “Don’t you look well?” won’t go over as intended, either.

I have learned that if someone announces they have lost weight, I should first look for cues, before saying “congratulations.” It might be an “I’m so sorry” moment. Similar to divorce.

Once, a friend announced that her divorce was final. I’d heard the horror stories, so I knew she was glad to be shot of the guy, but I responded, “I’m sorry and congratulations.” She burst into tears, hugged me, and said, “YOU UNDERSTAND!” She was grieving for the loss of the relationship, even while being overjoyed to be rid of the jerk.

Weight loss, divorce and pregnancy announcements – treat them the same. See if the other person is actually happy about it before you say how much better it is now. You might very well be surprised!

Now, complimenting a person on their accomplishments or their personality almost always goes over well.

Unimaginative
6 years ago

@Michelle Young, I often respond to announcements like those with, “Am I happy or sad for you?” It usually goes over okay. Or I compliment their clothing or hairstyle. “That colour looks good on you.”

Unimaginative
6 years ago

Um, I didn’t mean that as a correction, or anything. Just throwing a few more suggestions into the thread.

AbsintheDexterous
AbsintheDexterous
6 years ago

I kind of do what you do Unimaginative, with the happy/sad thing, though I phrase it more along the lines of “Is this a good thing or a bad thing?”

But I also spend a lot of time reading etiquette forums, so I try not to comment on other people’s appearances unless it’s positive and not extremely personal (unless it’s a really close friend). I also find a well-placed and sincere “How are you doing?” will never fail – if someone wants to talk about it, they will mention it. If they don’t, I take the cue that they probably don’t want to mention it and asking how they are doing without any other context might come as a welcome reprieve from constantly fielding intrusive questions. Either way, you do good.

And that doctor opium4themasses, UGH. I’d be flabbergasted.

blahlistic (@blahlistic)

She was grieving for the loss of the relationship, even while being overjoyed to be rid of the jerk.

…I totally get that.

weirwoodtreehugger
6 years ago

Michelle,
Mittens is adorable! I see she has a little white smudge on her forehead. Darrow has one of those too and it’s my favorite thing about his looks. It’s very kissable.

Usually if I’m going to compliment someone’s appearance I stick to clothes or hairstyle. Or say something that can be interpreted as positive like “you look cute today.”

I have a policy of never saying something about a person’s weight unless they bring it up first and clearly want to discuss it. In addition to weight loss sometimes being the result of an illness, it can also be from disordered eating and compliments only reinforces that behavior. People always assume that a compliment on weight loss is a good thing, but not necessarily.

blahlistic (@blahlistic)

When I first got down to 200-ish, and before I got sick, I was bicycling up to 10 miles a day in traffic, I had a butt you could bounce rocks off of, legs muscled like a weightlifter, was using only one asthma inhaler.
I got sick first, THEN put on weight-stress eating and lack of exercise due to being chronically ill.
According to the WHO, I should weigh no more than 163. I’m at about 175 now, but was a lot fitter and healthier at 200.

Health=/=correct weight.

kittehserf
6 years ago

Completely off topic, at my uni accommodation we had this ~20cm tall duck that was grumpy and use to chase people around the carpark. I remember was a bit distracted and I tried to go to uni one day and this duck was outside my door and chased me back into the flat. 😛

So if you change “butthurt” to “anklehurt” then its actually a pretty good description. 🙂

Reminds me of the ducks and geese I saw at St James’s Park, back in the day. They’d bite your bum if you didn’t feed ’em fast enough.

LOL. Now I’m picturing a lush, colorful jungle, in which lurks a carnivorous tooth-monster hunting its phallic prey. I like it 🙂

This would be my favoured type:

http://i.imgur.com/Vs5TyaU.jpg

@kitteh – I love the cane and the moth! Thanks for sharing!

Michelle, my pleasure! It’s great to see you posting again, too.

Speaking of knitting, are you on Ravelry?

Mittens is so adorbs!! I love tuxedo kitties. My Mamie and Sheba were tuxedos.

kittehserf
6 years ago

Regarding bridge, reading the bridge column in the newspaper helps me understand what D&D sounds like to non-players. At this rate, I’ll probably teach myself to knit before I learn to play bridge.

That’s a good description, Robert. I read all the game discussions here and go “Buh?” before looking for another thread. 😀

Compliments – I’ll go for “Gorgeous hair-colour!” or “I love your jacket/boots!” or stuff like that. Never anything more personal, because it’s not people I know I’m talking to, except on the odd occasion people post pics of themselves here.

pallygirl
pallygirl
6 years ago

Compliments: not just what is said, but how (tone, exact phrasing, body language) and by whom (power relationship). I work in a small office with mainly women, and most of us have the personality where we notice if someone is wearing something new, and make a positive comment about it. We also want to see what people have bought in their lunchhour so we can oooo and ah over other people’s purchases. This is the first office I have worked in which has this type of dynamic, and I think it’s because we’re so small.

I remember years ago when I was …?23 I went to a horse racing day with my then boyfriend, who had passes to the members stand so I had to dress up. I bought a cheap but smart two piece suit and a top to go with it, both of which took me a while to hunt down. I also had my hair done. While we were inside the members bar, a very attractive and very nicely dressed woman a little older than I was then came up to me and said that she just wanted to let me know how nice I looked. And I thanked her for the compliment, and said that I thought she looked lovely too. I still remember that compliment because it was unexpected and genuine, and made my entire day.

But yeah, context is everything. 🙂

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
6 years ago

I actually appreciate compliments from women, especially older women, much more than compliments from men. Probably because it usually doesn’t seem like there’s any ulterior motive, if they’re telling you that you look nice it’s just because they think that you look nice.

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