Today, a look at an appalling apologia for domestic violence and abuse from everyone’s least favorite creepy expat, the anonymous “game” blogger behind Random Xpat Rantings. Oh, and he also offers a handy rationalization for child abuse as well.
Xsplat, is, by his own description, an expat in his late 40s living in Indonesia and “dating” a teenager considerably less than half his age. Well, not just dating: apparently he feels that he “owns” her.
He starts off his post by arguing that parents have the right to spank their children because the children are, in essence, their property:
Society as a whole remains agnostic as to the value of judiciously spanking recalcitrant children. We remain agnostic because at a fundamental level we realize that the parents have the right to choose. Their children are THEIR children. They literally belong to them.
He then extends this metaphor to relationships between adult men and women in perhaps the creepiest way possible:
Much of sexual love is an add on and re-working of mammalian Daddy/daughter love, and also mother/son love. Men who want to retain sexual tension in the long term must keep the relationship as Daddy/daughter.
You have a right to punish, if she accepts that you have the right to punish.
Xsplat thinks that women find his “pimp hand” sexy:
Laying ownership claims is brute force sexy. Women at a fundamental level understand that while they will always struggle to be a free agent, that when properly owned she can be an entirely different king of person. A deeply sexually charged, constantly submissive and sexually engaged, better woman. A woman with direction.
He argues that women need this sort of “discipline” — which, he makes clear, can involve physical violence — because they are essentially children.
Children and women need boundaries. They will test and act out to the limit of those boundaries. Some children respond well to a gentle word. Some wind up in juvie despite every best effort. Some pimps and parents reward and discipline purely psychologically, while others get physical. Some children learn and behave well under gentle conditions of subtle hints and direction, others have stubborn negative habits that require more forceful re-direction.
A woman who is owned is a very different creature from one who considers herself a strong independent woman.
An owned woman will give you her all, just for the opportunity to remain owned.
He ends his post by boasting about how he applied his “pimp hand” to “N18” – that is, his 18-year-old girlfriend – when she “acted out” at a night club because, he says, she was jealous of the attention he was paying to another woman.
I’m in Bali now with N18, a 32 year old ex who I met when she was 23 … and a potential new intern/partner. We were out clubbing and N18 started to get jealous of the attention that the older woman was getting. … So she started to act out a bit and attention whore on the stage and the dance floor. I’d had a lot to drink, and so by the time we got home my emotions were unrestrained. I called her out on her behaviour, and was not gentle.
In his mind, this assertion of his “ownership” of her only brought the two closer together:
As usual I was awoken with blowjobs and the day was filled with constant attentive behavior. Plus. This is not a reaction out of fear, it is a pure bonding reaction.
That’s what he wants us to think, anyway.
Or maybe he’s trying to convince himself that he’s not, you know, an angry, jealous asshole living in a country with a per capita income less than one-fifth that of the US who’s using his money to exploit and possibly abuse a teenager who wouldn’t give him the time of day if she weren’t poor and he weren’t, at least relatively, rich.
Xsplat is not the most influential manosphere blogger by any stretch of the imagination, but he’s enough of a celebrity in that little world that he had his own “Ask Me Anything” thread on Reddit’s Red Pill subreddit last year.
That woman in the pic looks really uncomfortable. I feel kind of sorry for her.
Yeah, would love to hear the story behind that picture, if there is one.
Late to the thread, and just my opinion, but…
I find with the first few Discworld books, Lord Pterry really changed tone somewhere between The Light Fantastic and Mort. The first two really feel to me like Pratchett was trying to write a classic fantasy series while trying to parody the genre at the same time.
By the time he wrote Sourcery it’s pretty clear he’s just taking the piss, and I think the writing improves for not trying to do too many different things at once. I’m a big fan of all of the early Discworld books, but I don’t feel like the series hit its stride until at least book 4.
I’m familiar(ish) with London and that was the only thing I liked about Neverwhere.
@strivingally, yeah, I didn’t think he’d got his formular right, or hit his stride, whatever, at least until Mort. I only got a few pages into The Colour of Magic: the Fafhrd and Grey Mouser parody characters just had me rolling my eyes, and the style – nope. I’m glad I’d already read a few others – Lords and Ladies was the first – or I wouldn’t have bothered at all.
Here’s a photo I took of PTerry about 1997, when he was here for a book signing tour. It was before Carpe Jugulum came out and he talked about how rebellious vampire kids dress (I was in my Goth phase at the time).
What in the hell would possibly be wrong with this dude dating an 18-year old?
Good for him: I hope I’m dating 18-y/os when I’m his age.
For the record, I (obviously) don’t endorse physical violence towards women, except when part of the judicial system, and if this fellow is guilty of that then by all means call him out for that. I don’t see how *who* he dates has anything to do with it.
Thanks for stopping by, Hector. Do let the door hit you in the ass on the way out.
I’m not entirely sure what part of your 3 comment mess would have made it obvious that you’re not a full-on proponent of violence against women, but hey, congratulations. Throwing a party for you out back.
So, Hector sees absolutely nothing wrong with preying on desperately poor teenagers and physically “disciplining” them.
Hector is an asshole.
Piss off, Hector.
For the person asking about Christopher Moore books – I really liked Lamb, but Bite Me and You Suck I HATED, and stopped reading any others. Any others worth checking out?
As for Pratchett, I really enjoyed Nation and liked The Long Earth enough to be interested in reading the rest of the series. Discworld – enjoyed everything I’ve read so far, but wow have a long way to go (will check out Feet of Clay next!)
RE: Hector
Good for him: I hope I’m dating 18-y/os when I’m his age.
You may hope, but I take solace in the belief that you won’t succeed.
I (obviously) don’t endorse physical violence towards women, except when part of the judicial system,
The hell does this even mean? We don’t lock people into stocks anymore. This is the 21st century. Get with it.
Also, you realize this guy expressed having a boner for his infant son, right? This is really the guy you want to be emulating? That’s pathetic.