Ladies, watch out! Men’s Rights Redditor warspite88 is on to you! Your painted faces don’t fool him! Your concealer cannot conceal the truth! He knows your lips aren’t really that red! He knows your eyelids aren’t really that blue!
Yes, that’s right: it’s time for another angry MRA rant explaining to us why women wearing makeup oppresses men, somehow.
In a post with the delightfully over-the-top title “Men’s rights are directly tied to the power of paint and powder. Ill explain,” warspite88 sets forth his theory:
It is my belief that women have become so beautiful through the use of makeup that most women and men are influenced dramatically and view women more as goddess and men as dogs. The power of makeup has helped to fuel a war against men’s basic human rights.
Uh, what?
Lets face it, men are ugly compared to women, right? Many men feel sorry for women or think it is oppressive that so many women wear makeup.
I’m pretty sure most men don’t get angry when a woman puts on lipstick. That’s just you, dude. Well, you and a thousand other MRAs.
Well, if you dig really deep into history and our modern use of makeup, you will see it points to one key element of humanity, Power.
Wait. I thought female power resided in the ass, not the face. Didn’t Warren Farrell write a book about that or something?
Power to attract those you want (or label unwanted attention as harassment as a result of powder power)
Powder power? Is that like miniskirt power? You are Warren Farrell, aren’t you?
Power to influence Power to feel good about yourself (vain or not) Just a few examples
Dude, sorry to interupt your little rant here, but would it kill you to put periods at the end of your sentences?
Makeup is expensive, a huge industry, so money and making others pay for your power is in high demand.
I had no idea the women were so devious. Making men pay for their makeup, which they then use to make men pay for … more makeup. Lather, rinse, repeat. It’s ingenious. At least until the makeup-using manipulator is found dead in her apartment, lipstick tube still in her hand, crushed by the gigantic boxes of makeup she conned poor male suckers into buying for her.
[W]e see it in every day life, in relationship, those trying to get relationships. we see it in business, court rooms, churches, places of power. We see it in schools, young girls even. We see it in the media oh yes those sexy Fox women, wonder why those women were hired? Why they put on so much makeup? Take a guess boys, take a guess white knights. Take a guess MRMs.
You seem a little fixated on the Fox News women.
The power of paint and powder to influence others minds, their reactions, their actions, it is one of the most deeply rooted human aspects of power projection yet few ever take it seriously. The power of makeup to make women beautiful to seduce and control a horny man or a white knight has built kingdoms, it has destroyed kingdoms, it has had major political influence around the world for all of history.
Behold, the most powerful woman in history:
Weird. I feel an almost irresistible urge to buy that woman some more makeup. MUS T RESIST.
There is a reason why most women use makeup, because it gives them power, subtle, acceptable power that few men can ignore.
Women’s sexuality, it is natural and men are pawns to it because men are wired to view women as sexual objects. … So when men see a woman dolled up with makeup more often than not his head falls head over heels with lust (not love) desire (not caring).
His HEAD falls HEAD over HEELS with LUST.
His HEAD.
Let’s just think about this for a second. How does a HEAD fall head over heels? A HEAD DOESN’T HAVE HEELS IT IS JUST A HEAD.
Does it borrow some heels for the occasion? Does it hold the heels in its mouth? So many questions.
The power of beauty and charisma that comes with paint and powder changes the world.
So how is it related to mens rights?
Oh, this oughtta be good.
Go outside, yes leave your computer. Go to any public place and watch people. Watch how men react to women who are dressed sexy or wear more makeup.
Uh, ok. But then I’d have to put on some pants.
Or just watch this stuff on TV.
Yeah, on second thought, let’s not go outside at all. Let’s base our entire knowledge of how men and women interact on old sitcoms and Fox News. You know, the news channel with all those sexy Fox women.
Anyway, so how does this relate to Men’s Rights?
Men are ugly compared to women with paint and powder right? How dare men show attraction to beautiful women, they must be pigs! Right?
Uh, what? Is this your actual argument? Are you actually trying to make some sort of sense? Or are you just typing?
White Knights love beautiful women on the outside , oh yes the white knight shield of justice is like a mirror to reflect the beauty of any female even a woman who murders her husband or rapes a boy.
Wat.
But a white knights sword is dripping with the blood of innocent men who dare even attempt equality with a beautiful woman.
Damn, this got dark, really dark, all of a sudden.
The power of paint and powder, it has affected every one of you reading this at some point in your life. it will again.
Well, not if one of those white knights has stabbed you to death, I mean, yikes! But let’s not get hung up on details.
It is not evil or wrong to wear makeup in my opinion but it is important that we become aware of how much of a paint and powder worshiping society we have become.
Is it any wonder men’s rights and well being have been left far behind in society that craves women and their paint and powder? Just saying.
Just saying?
JUST SAYING?!!
THAT’S how your ending this post?
Dude, your cockamamie thesis is that evil makeup-wearing, husband-murdering, boy-raping women rule the world, while easily manipulated white knights are going around wantonly stabbing any Men’s Rights Activists they can find.
And you end your rant with “just saying?”
Really? I mean, if you’re going to put it out there, fucking put it out there! Commit to it! End with something, you know, dramatic.
“By Grabthar’s hammer, by the suns of Warvan, you shall be avenged!”
You know, something like that. Something cool.
End strong! End big!
Just saying.
Oh, and in case you’re wondering about that Grabthar’s hammer thing:
—
Max Factor: The Make-up of Gynocratic Tyrants.
Maybe she’s born with it…
… or maybe it’s DISTILLED MALE TEARS.
Women are evil because they wear make-up which makes men attracted to them.
But if they don’t wear make-up, they’re also evil for not making themselves attractive for men.
MRAs: a thousand ways to say “we never got over the cooties phase”.
This one is so dumb I almost feel bad about mocking him. His head fell head over heels? Really? Is he a two-headed acrobat or what?
These are your people, MRAs. These are the dumbasses who your rhetoric attracts. Look at your life, look at your choices. Feel shame.
Wow, of course, I never understood that society’s unattainable and harmful beauty standards are actually MY SOURCE OF ULTIMATE POWER!
To the makeup counter, man-slaves!
*rides off in a chariot pulled by white knights*
But if make-up has all of these magical properties, why don’t MRA’s start wearing make-up? Think of the power they would finally wield! They would literally get away with murder. It would solve every single MRA problem to date. I guess maybe they’re worried about being engulfed by the swarms of men who will be hypnotized by their eyeshadow?
This guy does realize that no one (male or female) goes in front of a TV camera without first being caked in make-up, right?
His theory kind of breaks down a bit when you consider that his archnemeses, the radical feminists, tend to wear NO makeup (along with hippie women, who also believe in total equality, by the way).
Yes, because men totally see each other like this. (Warning, it’s large and a bit on the creepy side!)
David, all the other MRAs used their allotment by putting two at the end of their sentences. There won’t be any more until the next delivery.
If it’s the head I suspect it is and it’s dragging around his feet, I do Not Want To Know.
So … white knights have to keep their armour polished really bright, so women can use them as mirrors (glass mirrors haven’t been invented, apparently) and they have to be careful of those swords ‘cos they’re dripping blood everywhere?
(This is why knights need squires. That’s a lot of armour maintenance.)
Society is only het dudes* craving looking at women’s paint and powder, but somehow the men who are society have left their own rights behind.
… Wat.
*Because lesbians don’t exist, of course.
What’s all this stuff about powder, anyway? I’ll have you know that some of us suck the resources out of men via controlling their erections without using any powder at all. I, for example, use BB cream, whereas I think our friend here is picturing something more like this.
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-s3n_QEqN8NU/ToSdWhaRzKI/AAAAAAAAA3w/aSIAKe60hD0/s1600/woman+with+powder+puff.jpg
Which, let’s face it, is maybe just a teensy bit outdated as a means of manslave creation. Move with the times, dude.
I’ve actually had guys tell me I’d be so much cuter without all that “stuff” on my face, only to leave it off the next day and have them ask me if I’m sick or something. You just can’t win for losing…
Tune in next week, when this warthog takes on the deadly dangers of the French manicure, and the potent claws concealed under all those layers of polish. (Spoiler: Those rhinestone blingy-thingies can cut glass!)
Now to go put on some BB cream and coral lipgloss, and get out and MISANDER!!!
Bonus points for Galaxy Quest 😀
That said, these type of rants really drive me insane because someone like me who can’t wear makeup for health reasons is always, ALWAYS called ugly and told to cover it up somehow. This rant is just… How do these guys get these ideas?
Oh, probably. There’s so much homophobia in that (bowel) movement, it’s not even funny.
On the other hand, I’ve always liked me a guy who could really pull off a full face of tasteful makeup. David Bowie…Gary Numan…Nick Rhodes…David Sylvian… >fans self<
What if I put eyeliner on a man to make him prettier? Am I voluntarily giving him some of my power, or just enslaving him by forcing him to be more attractive to me?
(This is a thing that I have actually done, just for the record.)
I was picturing makeup something like this:
http://image.glamourdaze.com/2013/05/1920s-makeup-ad.jpg
Even when I was having relationships, I never used makeup. Somehow I had relationships with men anyway, but it must be the reason I ended up without my own manslave.
Argh! The missed opportunites for bathing in the tears of a 1000 men!
Nah, I’d have hated having manslaves, and am quite happy being single and living alone.
I feel like this guy is really proud of the rhetorical value of “paint and powder” even though the phrase evokes “clown makeup” more than it does “21st century cosmetics.”
I wonder if he thinks that women literally just sit there with a tube of oil paint and a brush and go to town. Why go all the way to Sephora when you can just stop off at the art supply store on your way home?
Seriously. I think the last time I saw someone refer to makeup as “paint” was when I read Cheaper by the Dozen in sixth grade. Is warspite88 a time traveler from the 1920’s? Will he soon be complaining about how a girl will let you buy her phosphates at the soda fountain ’til the cows come home, but she’ll never wear your fraternity pin?
That’s why I always do my make up in a blood and woad motif.
http://i.imgur.com/1bEKyK9.png
In the meantime, the people actually getting away with killing and raping in the world that exists outside of this MRAsshole’s fevered imagination are men. The cop that murdered a man on the street for selling cigarettes was a man. The rapist that got probation for raping a 14 yr old girl was a man. How do these tinfoil fedora wearers manage to maintain their outlandish conspiracy theories while rejecting reality? I really want to know.
Okay, this made me laugh out loud. Now I’m visualizing the bouncing heads from Spirited Away holding heels in their mouths as they bound away…
Another great post, David. I’m glad that between all the vile misogyny and blatant bigotry you encounter on a daily basis, you sometimes encounter hilariously off the charts ignorant stuff such as this. It’s just as spectacularly wrong as anything your average MRA might pull out of his ass, but at least it’s silly enough to warrant a smile.
@kittehserf:
Bwahaha! That was perfect.
BTW: Is the delivery day for all manosphere stuff every Manday?
Bad pun is bad. Going to a corner to think about what I’ve done.
I don’t know, but I know it isn’t Caterday.
Look, warspite88, I am a “white knight” by any misogynist’s definition, and I don’t like makeup. To me it seems like hiding, pretending, conforming; those are not activities I value. Though on the other hand I have to admit it’s none of my business if a woman (or a man for that matter – shocking idea) wants to wear makeup, for whatever reason.
Long story short, I think you’re full of crap.
(I would post this response directly to warspite88, but that would involve giving Reddit traffic.)
The sexualization of women’s bodies has no doubt has an impact on social relations, but the result is that women are viewed as sex that must be obtained by men. That’s not power, that’s objectification and rape culture.
The only men I have ever seen call makeup anything close to “oppressive” are the same men who tell women that they are obligated to look “natural” because “guys don’t care about makeup.” So…yeah.
Yeah, such a privilege of mine to label my experiences of harassment as harassment.
TIL self-esteem is literally a measure of institutionalized power. Ok.
Men are merely “pawns” when they literally dehumanize women in order to find them attractive? Ok…
Oh, but you see, the worship of makeup is but one aspect of the institutionalization of women’s butt power. Please focus on the real issue here.
Easy, breezy, misandry, Cover Girl!
I too wondered why MRAs don’t just wear makeup if it’s such a shortcut to unchecked power.
Citation needed dude. I think you might just be projecting your own attitudes towards women onto every other man.
This guy sees himself, a man as a dog. He has multiple heads. Is he Cerberus?