So two of the females in my household have decided, sadly, that they want to get in on this whole Women Against Feminism thing. Yes, that’s right: they want to publicly declare their opposition to feminism.
Against my better judgment, I agreed to take pictures of them with signs spelling out their objections. None of their arguments make much sense to me, but, hey, they’re entitled to make their case on the internet if that’s what they want.
There’s just one little complication: the two antifeminist females in my household are not, you know, human females. They’re cats. Not being, strictly speaking, women, they can’t really post their pics to the Women Against Feminism blog.
So in the interest of free speech and fair play, I’ve set up a Tumblr blog where my cats, and other cats who share their beliefs, can take their stand against feminism – no matter how ridiculous their arguments are.
I present to you: Confused Cats Against Feminism.
You can see the first post there now, featuring my own adorably furry traitors to their gender.
I urge you to submit pictures of your own antifeminist cats, with their own little signs.
You can submit pics on the Confused Cats Against Feminism site, post pics in the comments below, or you can email them to me here at futrelle at manboobz.com.
There’s just one rule: your cats must be genuinely confused about why they oppose feminism, and generally unclear about what feminism is.
And the ideas expressed on their signs must be their own. In other words, I don’t want any Men’s Rights Activists paying cats on Fiverr to hold their signs for them. That shit won’t fly in this litterbox!
All that said, blatant photoshopping is perfectly fine. This is the internet, after all.
And if your animal friend is something other than a cat, that’s fine too. As long as it’s possible that they might think that they’re a cat.
Also, feel free to put the word “Poland” or the Polish flag on your pictures. A lot of the women on the Women Against Feminism blog do that, for some reason.
In my childhood we basically ruined a dog by not having him desexed: dad was opposed for unstated reasons to the removal of our new dog’s balls, and we lived in a rural area where everyone knows that you should desex your dogs to prevent troublesome roaming behaviour because you don’t have secure suburban fences. Well dad got his way, the dog started roaming everywhere and pissing on our neighbours’ homes, and we had to give him away to a shelter because it had by that time become apparent to us that we were not, as a family unit, responsible enough to take care of a dog as it should be cared for.
Am I the only one who really wants to see more photos of David’s cats?
I could so see misogynists in the far future, after their banishment to the cold of Pluto, totally re engineering animals to fit human patriarchal ideas. Just imagine what they’d do to hyenas. And oddly enough ancient philosophers did believe that bees were ruled by kings.
Loving all the great photos and cute pets!
Sir Bodsworth wins all the internets for the Dr. Seusse entry!
@saphy – you’re lucky your dog lived! Where I come from, some farmer would have shot him (stupid hillbillies).
I can, of course, think of one particular cat who tends to have the exact opposite happen to her.
I found these cats on Tunacannnn.com and rewarded them handsomely for pretending to have opinions.
http://imgur.com/QnsEAPL
http://imgur.com/pqwaDzv
http://imgur.com/xKy2hiR
“I don’t need feminism because what’s a male?”
#confusedaphidsagainstfeminism
And, of course, some cats are not quite as confused as they pretend to be…
From what I understand, when the barbs rip the female cat’s vagina she releases an egg, so the purpose of the barbs is absolutely perfectly timed ovulation.
I reckon a cat vagina has gotta be tough enough to take these barbs without getting wounded. Otherwise, female cats would end up with an extremely high risk of infection due to being torn up in the vagina after mating, and that just seems really stupid from an evolutionary standpoint.
(I should add that I’m not a cat expert, this is just speculation on my part.)
“I don’t need feminism because I always win at cock swordfighting.”
#confusedflatwormsagainstfeminism
From what I’ve read, the female cat needs the barbs to achieve orgasm, which both releases the egg and brings her out of heat.
When I’ve seen it happen, it’s been astonishing. Like, seriously, if humans orgasmed like cats did I don’t think there’d be any war. It just went on and on and on.
It’s the same with rabbits. For years scientists could not work out how to artificially inseminate rabbits, until they sussed that the buck has bristles on his penis which trigger ovulation.
The copulation of cats that I’ve witnessed was hair-raising and earsplitting and looked quite gruelling (every time an attempt failed the queen turned and slashed at the tom’s face), but both participants seemed enthusiastically consenting and in no hurry to stop.
Forgot to add: where they artificially inseminate rabbits they use something like a small paintbrush brush with two bristles on it.
That article on Discovery was interesting. My cat is the exception that proves the rule, I guess. He’s fine being home with me alone, but once my husband comes home, I may as well not exist for the most part.
This made sense in my head.
“I don’t need feminism because I use whichever genitalia is convenient at the time. When it takes this long to catch up to a potential mate, finding out we have incompatible parts would be a shame!”
#ConfusedSnailsAgainstFeminism
I don’t need feminism because I’m an amazing fencer. #ConfusedPlathyhelminthyesAgainstFeminism
“I don’t need feminism because my mate is already nothing but an embedded sperm factory for me.”
#ConfusedAnglerfishAgainstFeminism
I don’t need feminism because I already copulated and fed.
#FemaleWolfSpidersDon’tCareAboutFeminism
I love all of these IDNFB slogans/posters.
I DO need feminism so the human males will stop hunting me for their bonbon eating mates!
#WoolyMammothsForFeminism
You are not alone!
This thread just gets better and better!
The Frisky picked it up: http://www.thefrisky.com/2014-07-25/confused-cats-against-feminism-tumblr-puts-an-eyeroll-worthy-social-media-meme-to-bed/
I never knew bon bons were made of mammoths. That explains a whole lot.
@grumpycatisagirl – yes. The quality of bon bons has decreased significantly since the poor woolies went extinct. Modern elephant is a poor substitute, so I make do with many, many man tears.
@katz
I thought it was hilarious.