I took great pleasure in cutting off my fuckwitted father, years back. I presume I’ll never hear from him again – and if I do, he’ll have to pass a message via my sister, and he’ll get the same treatment (which she would probably tell him).
Yeah. I AM hugely relieved to know I never have to see those emails unless I want to, though. Once I see them, I feel compelled to have one of my filter friends read them and tell me, otherwise I just agonize and worry and make it worse in my own head.
kittehserf
10 years ago
That’s how I am with blogs I get pissed off with reading – tempted to read them anyway – so I block them. I don’t know if I’d be tempted to read emails from jerkbrain parent; if I did, it’d be “What the fuck does he want?” More irritating than spam, but not much. I don’t have personal pain, let alone trauma, to deal with, just settled, solid contempt.
Not physically trapped, no. People aren’t even specifically telling me not to leave. It’s just hard for me to go back to my place because I’m too anxious to even do anything due to being in close proximity with someone who used to be abusive towards me, my uncle. If I wanted to leave, I could easily do so. I can’t really explain myself well, sorry. The least you should know is that I’m not in any danger. My uncle doesn’t threaten my life or anything – I’m just extremely triggered by talking to him because he is so overwhelming, disablist, and classist towards me every time he gets on my case about how I’m lazy for not having a job. I’m sorry for alarming everyone.
cassandrakitty
10 years ago
Did you guys see the new dumbassery from The Times of Israel in which Irwin E Blank is claiming that the Bible specifically tells Jewish people to destroy Hamas? I’m getting ready to nominate them as the Worst Newspaper in the World, they’re even beating the Daily Fail by a mile.
It’s the fact that they’re putting stuff like that up and then taking it down like “oops, didn’t mean it” that has me ready to vote them into the hall of newspaper infamy. They know exactly what they’re doing with that shit.
At least the comments are generally calling him out. I don’t accept his claim of being a secularist though, not if he then turns around (as he has done) and uses a religous book as the basis for his advocacy. How on earth is that secularist?
Fucking hell, I thought after Rwanda and the break up of Yugoslavia that the UN would act fast against genocide. I was wrong. Sometimes I want off this planet.
cassandrakitty
10 years ago
Who has the money? That’s who pulls the strings (and the reason why I will never entirely abandon Marxism).
I think Times of Israel also wrote up an article a few days that rather than expanding on the thousands of Palestinian civilian deaths in Gaza so far, instead wrote about an owl getting injured in the midst of the casualties. It’s already surpassed the DM in my mind, though I’ve rly just read their sexist gossip section.
cassandrakitty
10 years ago
Oh yeah, I saw the owl thing to. At that point they were basically flipping everyone who thinks they’re being evil colonialist assholes off.
Background for my situation (I’ll try to be coherent but it won’t be easy sorry): My sister came here on Tuesday, and on Monday I came up to my uncle’s place (which is right next to my dad’s place) to stay over and wait until she arrived so I could see her. I wanted to leave on Wednesday evening for my place because I was planning to go on Thursday to the clinic that prescribes my hormones and ask for a refill and a raise in my dosage.
Then my dad said “I will not let you leave. Your sister just came here and you want to go back already?” I said I needed more clothes from my place because I had brought only two sets of clothes, but he didn’t care. I even told him that I was going to come right back on Friday (today) to see my sister again, and he still didn’t care. I was scared of him so I just complied with his demands, being passive and pathetic as I usually am. And I decided to stay here until this upcoming Monday just so I could avoid making him angry by leaving on the weekend.
And then this morning my brother was on his way to pick me up and take me on a hike with some friends of ours and my sister and my cousin. My uncle got very upset at me and ended up triggering an anxiety attack. He angrily lectured me about how I’m wasting my time going on hikes when I should literally be constantly applying for jobs (the same man who once told me “If you’re not working to reach a 100k salary, you are wasting your time every minute”). I know it sounds stupid for me to get scared of such a thing but he has been abusive towards me before and I have PTSD, which makes me severely triggered by even the thought of interpersonal confrontation. And that takes me to now, where I’m just typing away constantly and hoping I’ll feel sleepy enough soon. I’m less anxious now but still in very bad mental shape.
pallygirl
10 years ago
@Ally: please take care of yourself. It doesn’t sound like you’re in an emotionally safe place. 🙁
I think I’ll be ok. What usually helps me go to sleep is imagining someone else sleeping right beside me, which is silly but better than staring at the ceiling praying that no one hurts me. I have weird ways of coping, but they work. Sometimes even just hugging a large pillow helps. I feel like such a kid. Whatever. Night y’all.
contrapangloss
10 years ago
So, today was long and mixed in goodness levels. Swimming in the ocean was nice, seeing sun was nice, some other stuff was not nice.
One thing was really, really awful, but I don’t get to talk about it yet. Will get to soon, with a department person.
I could use some hugs, though.
Giving the pup I’m house-sitting much love, as a mixed “I’m so sorry for being away four hours longer than planned” and “Thank you for being huggable and all that is good”. I took a five minute detour on the way home to her to buy a special apology chew-treat.
pallygirl
10 years ago
/hugs to contrapangloss. And I gave Mr Studmuffin extra pets from you.
I hope things get better soon. 🙂
chronic lurker
10 years ago
*Hugs*
best of luck with the bad stuff. 🙁 I hope it gets better soon.
Whoa…what’s going on with Shakesville? Trying to google it, but so far I’m only coming up with reblogs about it but with no links. What’s being said about it seems disturbing, but there are any specific links to the meltdown itself?
What is going on with Shakesville? I have to admit I never participate there because I don’t like the vibe, but I follow it because she often posts good stories.
(Also, since I’m stopping by I wanted everyone to know the hug barrel has been completely restocked, and there are kittens, penguins, and all kinds of beautiful fish for people who’d prefer to take comfort from non-humans.)
Lea
10 years ago
Apparently, there are entire sites dedicated to talking trash about Melissa over at Shakesville, doxxing her family and her commenters and in general being terrible because some people got called out or banned on her site. I like to read there occasionally, but I don’t often comment or feel the need to comment. It seems that there are people who can’t grasp the idea of a blog owner having standards of her own or that blog not existing solely to please them. It’s a real mess, with people declaring that by not providing them with a space to muck around in as they please, Melissa is abusing them etc. It’s a shame.
We Hunted The Mammoth
Ah, I see. I can understand that.
I took great pleasure in cutting off my fuckwitted father, years back. I presume I’ll never hear from him again – and if I do, he’ll have to pass a message via my sister, and he’ll get the same treatment (which she would probably tell him).
Yeah. I AM hugely relieved to know I never have to see those emails unless I want to, though. Once I see them, I feel compelled to have one of my filter friends read them and tell me, otherwise I just agonize and worry and make it worse in my own head.
That’s how I am with blogs I get pissed off with reading – tempted to read them anyway – so I block them. I don’t know if I’d be tempted to read emails from jerkbrain parent; if I did, it’d be “What the fuck does he want?” More irritating than spam, but not much. I don’t have personal pain, let alone trauma, to deal with, just settled, solid contempt.
I love being trapped with an abusive family member. Family is so lovely.
Ally, please tell me that you can get away and are not physically trapped?
Not physically trapped, no. People aren’t even specifically telling me not to leave. It’s just hard for me to go back to my place because I’m too anxious to even do anything due to being in close proximity with someone who used to be abusive towards me, my uncle. If I wanted to leave, I could easily do so. I can’t really explain myself well, sorry. The least you should know is that I’m not in any danger. My uncle doesn’t threaten my life or anything – I’m just extremely triggered by talking to him because he is so overwhelming, disablist, and classist towards me every time he gets on my case about how I’m lazy for not having a job. I’m sorry for alarming everyone.
Did you guys see the new dumbassery from The Times of Israel in which Irwin E Blank is claiming that the Bible specifically tells Jewish people to destroy Hamas? I’m getting ready to nominate them as the Worst Newspaper in the World, they’re even beating the Daily Fail by a mile.
@cassandrakitty
Yep, I saw that. And just before that article, this happened: http://www.ibtimes.com/when-genocide-permissible-article-taken-down-times-israel-yochanan-gordons-post-sparks-1646490
It’s the fact that they’re putting stuff like that up and then taking it down like “oops, didn’t mean it” that has me ready to vote them into the hall of newspaper infamy. They know exactly what they’re doing with that shit.
It’s not taken down, I just read it at: http://blogs.timesofisrael.com/1-samuel-1518/
At least the comments are generally calling him out. I don’t accept his claim of being a secularist though, not if he then turns around (as he has done) and uses a religous book as the basis for his advocacy. How on earth is that secularist?
Fucking hell, I thought after Rwanda and the break up of Yugoslavia that the UN would act fast against genocide. I was wrong. Sometimes I want off this planet.
Who has the money? That’s who pulls the strings (and the reason why I will never entirely abandon Marxism).
I think Times of Israel also wrote up an article a few days that rather than expanding on the thousands of Palestinian civilian deaths in Gaza so far, instead wrote about an owl getting injured in the midst of the casualties. It’s already surpassed the DM in my mind, though I’ve rly just read their sexist gossip section.
Oh yeah, I saw the owl thing to. At that point they were basically flipping everyone who thinks they’re being evil colonialist assholes off.
Background for my situation (I’ll try to be coherent but it won’t be easy sorry): My sister came here on Tuesday, and on Monday I came up to my uncle’s place (which is right next to my dad’s place) to stay over and wait until she arrived so I could see her. I wanted to leave on Wednesday evening for my place because I was planning to go on Thursday to the clinic that prescribes my hormones and ask for a refill and a raise in my dosage.
Then my dad said “I will not let you leave. Your sister just came here and you want to go back already?” I said I needed more clothes from my place because I had brought only two sets of clothes, but he didn’t care. I even told him that I was going to come right back on Friday (today) to see my sister again, and he still didn’t care. I was scared of him so I just complied with his demands, being passive and pathetic as I usually am. And I decided to stay here until this upcoming Monday just so I could avoid making him angry by leaving on the weekend.
And then this morning my brother was on his way to pick me up and take me on a hike with some friends of ours and my sister and my cousin. My uncle got very upset at me and ended up triggering an anxiety attack. He angrily lectured me about how I’m wasting my time going on hikes when I should literally be constantly applying for jobs (the same man who once told me “If you’re not working to reach a 100k salary, you are wasting your time every minute”). I know it sounds stupid for me to get scared of such a thing but he has been abusive towards me before and I have PTSD, which makes me severely triggered by even the thought of interpersonal confrontation. And that takes me to now, where I’m just typing away constantly and hoping I’ll feel sleepy enough soon. I’m less anxious now but still in very bad mental shape.
@Ally: please take care of yourself. It doesn’t sound like you’re in an emotionally safe place. 🙁
Hugs if you want them. I wish I could help more.
I think I’ll be ok. What usually helps me go to sleep is imagining someone else sleeping right beside me, which is silly but better than staring at the ceiling praying that no one hurts me. I have weird ways of coping, but they work. Sometimes even just hugging a large pillow helps. I feel like such a kid. Whatever. Night y’all.
So, today was long and mixed in goodness levels. Swimming in the ocean was nice, seeing sun was nice, some other stuff was not nice.
One thing was really, really awful, but I don’t get to talk about it yet. Will get to soon, with a department person.
I could use some hugs, though.
Giving the pup I’m house-sitting much love, as a mixed “I’m so sorry for being away four hours longer than planned” and “Thank you for being huggable and all that is good”. I took a five minute detour on the way home to her to buy a special apology chew-treat.
/hugs to contrapangloss. And I gave Mr Studmuffin extra pets from you.
I hope things get better soon. 🙂
*Hugs*
best of luck with the bad stuff. 🙁 I hope it gets better soon.
Swimming at least sounds like it was fun.
On a completely different note, have you seen what OKCupid have done? http://freethoughtblogs.com/pharyngula/2014/08/02/oh-so-thats-what-ethicists-do/
I would really recommend against using them.
One good thing that has come out of the Shakesville meltdown is that SVKA has a thread compiling resources for people in abusive relationships. http://shakesvillekoolaid.tumblr.com/post/93624108159/ive-found-the-parallels-folks-have-drawn-between-the#disqus_thread
Whoa…what’s going on with Shakesville? Trying to google it, but so far I’m only coming up with reblogs about it but with no links. What’s being said about it seems disturbing, but there are any specific links to the meltdown itself?
Welp…Clearly a lot can change since the last time I visited that blog. Holy shit. :/
What is going on with Shakesville? I have to admit I never participate there because I don’t like the vibe, but I follow it because she often posts good stories.
(Also, since I’m stopping by I wanted everyone to know the hug barrel has been completely restocked, and there are kittens, penguins, and all kinds of beautiful fish for people who’d prefer to take comfort from non-humans.)
Apparently, there are entire sites dedicated to talking trash about Melissa over at Shakesville, doxxing her family and her commenters and in general being terrible because some people got called out or banned on her site. I like to read there occasionally, but I don’t often comment or feel the need to comment. It seems that there are people who can’t grasp the idea of a blog owner having standards of her own or that blog not existing solely to please them. It’s a real mess, with people declaring that by not providing them with a space to muck around in as they please, Melissa is abusing them etc. It’s a shame.