Categories
men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny MRA whores

Dean Esmay's Secret Plan to Fight Sexism by Calling Everyone a Whore

Let’s say that you’re the “Managing Editor” of a website known far and wide for calling women “whores,” as well as an assortment of other 4- and 5-letter words generally considered crude sexist slurs. Let’s just say that you had a convention, and that during this convention your official spokeswoman went on a bit of a name calling rampage on Twitter, repeatedly attacking a woman who had tried to report on said convention as an “attention whore,” a “fame whore,” and a “little whore,” and offering similar “whore”-based assessments to other critics of the site.

And let’s just say that despite all this you also had a desire to convince the world that your site was not actually the misogynistic cesspit that it so obviously is. Would you:

1) Apologize for using the words “whore” and “bitch” and “c*nt” and other similar sexist epithets against women.

2) In your capacity as editor, quietly remove the word “whore” (and “bitch” and “c*nt”) from future postings on the site, and tell your PR maven to maybe come up with a less misogynistic insult of choice.

3) Start calling men whores so that no one can accuse you of hating women because, see we use “whore” to refer to men too!

The answer, of course, is 3 — at least if you’re Dean Esmay, “Managing Editor” of A Voice for Men. In a recent comment thread on AVFM, he declared:

Screen Shot 2014-07-08 at Tue, [Jul 8], 14 5

 

CONFIDENTIAL TO D— E—-: No one is buying your bullshit. Also, if you want to try to convince the world that you’re a Friend of Sex Workers, you should probably stop using the word “whore” as an insult for women or men.

 

610 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
contrapangloss
10 years ago

Yep. Fine example of MRALogic, at it’s convolutedest.

Lea
Lea
10 years ago

Sure, and when you call straight guys homophobic slurs it ceases to be homophobic.

Oh…wait…
No it does not. not.

Lea
Lea
10 years ago

Dang. I was laughing at Jamie Kilstien and I typed “not.” twice.
KIIILSTIEN! *shakes fist*

Luzbelitx
10 years ago

They still don’t grasp the difference between human rights advocacy “we want no one hurt” and their own motto “we want to hurt everyone equally”.

bunnybunny
bunnybunny
10 years ago

So he recognizes that “whore” makes no sense as a term for people who are paid to be dishonest, that it is offensive to use the word as such, and yet…?

bittersteel
bittersteel
10 years ago

Feminists call women “whores” (actually women in general do slut shaming far more than men do) and it’s the MRAs who point this out and defend the women being attacked. If you look at some of the articles about ICMI 14, you’ll see a particular feminist repeatedly, on multiple articles, implying that Erin Pizzey, Dr. Palmatier, Karen Straughn, and the Most Esteemed Senator Anne Cools are prostitutes when she says that they are “just telling these men what they want to hear. At least they’re being paid. What’s it called again when women are paid to make men feel special?” The MRAs are the ones pointing out that this is denigrating to women. I especially find it ironic that the feminists are always complaining about how women in politics are sexualized (I don’t believe it’s true because ew, they’re all over the age of 50! Anybody who sexualizes them is totally gross!) and then she implied that the Senator Anne Cools was a prostitute. Very diverse and totally non-racist of the feminists.

magnesium
10 years ago

Has he posted his super serious, mind-blowing, earth shattering questions to Mr. Serwer publicly? I’m excited to find out what all important questions the great minds at AVFM have for a reporter who dared ask about a faux-charity’s finances.

magnesium
10 years ago

Feminists call women “whores” (actually women in general do slut shaming far more than men do) and it’s the MRAs who point this out and defend the women being attacked. If you look at some of the articles about ICMI 14, you’ll see a particular feminist repeatedly, on multiple articles, implying that Erin Pizzey, Dr. Palmatier, Karen Straughn, and the Most Esteemed Senator Anne Cools are prostitutes when she says that they are “just telling these men what they want to hear. At least they’re being paid. What’s it called again when women are paid to make men feel special?” The MRAs are the ones pointing out that this is denigrating to women. I especially find it ironic that the feminists are always complaining about how women in politics are sexualized (I don’t believe it’s true because ew, they’re all over the age of 50! Anybody who sexualizes them is totally gross!) and then she implied that the Senator Anne Cools was a prostitute. Very diverse and totally non-racist of the feminists.

Wow, Bittersteel, can you point to the link that you’re directly quoting, and explain why one anonymous news commentator is now the official voice of all feminists?

ladyrainicorn517
ladyrainicorn517
10 years ago

I’m just tickled by that brief flash of self-awareness in the middle there. If you read his bloated comments as streams of consciousness – and I do – you get to see repression in action. It’s very exciting. For science.

girlscientist
girlscientist
10 years ago

@bittersteel:

(I don’t believe it’s true because ew, they’re all over the age of 50! Anybody who sexualizes them is totally gross!)

How old are you? Twelve?

maistrechat
10 years ago

I’m tempted to call a Poe on bittersteel after that “totally gross” aside.

bunnybunny
bunnybunny
10 years ago

Feminists call women “whores” (actually women in general do slut shaming far more than men do) and it’s the MRAs who point this out and defend the women being attacked.

Sure, MRAs will defend women who are being insulted if the woman is sympathetic to their cause. I would love to see an instance of an MRA defending Anita Sarkeesian or the woman protesting CAFE against gendered slurs. Lol.

Shiraz
Shiraz
10 years ago

Wait, bittersteel’s post wasn’t sarcastic? No, wait, now I’m being sarcastic. I mean, once you start a post with, “Feminists call women “whores” (actually women in general do slut shaming far more than men do)…” like it’s a scientific fact without a citation, you’ve already lost.

Shiraz
Shiraz
10 years ago

Oh, and that bit about sexualizing women politicians, and eww gross, they’re over 50! Yeah, very tweener. Very jr. shitlord in training. They start ’em young, don’t they?

manhattansbalcony
10 years ago

Will somebody explain to me why people who think date rape is just regretted sex would say things designed to make women regret sex? I’m willing to take them on their word that they actually believe it, but wouldn’t that make you work to relieve the stigma against having sex with men? According to them, men are suffering because women are made to feel ashamed of casual sex and there they are, making the problem worse.

FifthInterval
10 years ago

Of course, calling someone like Serwer a “whore” (using a misogynist slur against a man) involves feminizing them, which absolutely is an intended part of the insult, coming from them. This whole “it’s a gender-neutral term” dodge is utter horseshit.

Auntie Alias
Auntie Alias
10 years ago

Shorter bittersteel: Older women are gross. Thanks a lot, asshole.

bittersteel
bittersteel
10 years ago

You don’t believe that women are responsible for slut shaming? Um, that doesn’t even make any sense if you think about it logically. Men have very little incentive to slut-shame women if they want to sleep with them because that makes women less likely to sleep with them. The slut shaming is done by women to other women as a means of controlling access to sex. Multiple studies have showed this. Here’s the conclusion of one study as well as a link to the text: “The view that men suppress female sexuality received hardly any support and is flatly contradicted by some findings. Instead, the evidence favors the view that women have worked to stifle each other’s sexuality because sex is a limited resource that women use to negotiate with men, and scarcity gives women an advantage. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2012 APA, all rights reserved)” (Source: http://psycnet.apa.org/journals/gpr/6/2/166.pdf).

Another study found that women use slut-shaming as a way of competing with other women for mates: http://www.nytimes.com/2013/11/19/science/a-cold-war-fought-by-women.html?ref=science?src=dayp&_r=2&

A third study finds that wealthy/affluent women are more likely to slut shame, and that they usually slut shame less affluent women (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/06/02/slutshaming-isnt-related-sexual-activity_n_5418711.html). The whole point of that is to prevent less affluent women from using their sexuality to undermine the power that affluent women hold over the affluent/hot men.

I mean, let’s be real here. You guys think that MRAs are guys who can’t get laid. Why on earth would we want to slut shame? Doesn’t enforcing those types of sexual standards on women just make it less likely that we would get laid than if we encouraged women to have as much sex as possible? Plus I know from personal experience that I don’t really think about who’s sleeping with whom at college. It’s not my problem. I similarly don’t care if they’re using drugs or drinking hydrochloric acid or whatever. Not my problem, not my concern. but apparently you guys think I’m an evil patriarchal slut-shamer extraordinaire.

You guys have extreme cognitive dissonance.

leftwingfox
10 years ago

Will somebody explain to me why people who think date rape is just regretted sex would say things designed to make women regret sex?

If something happens to you, it’s your fault. If something happens to me, that’s also your fault.

It’s a great way to ensure they don’t feel any of those pesky emotions like sorrow, sympathy, pity, guilt or shame. They just get to keep nursing that sweet, delicious rage, spiced with self-righteousness.

damselindetech
10 years ago

Ooooh, evopsych. This is going to be entertaining. *grabs popcorn and hunkers down*

FifthInterval
10 years ago

“You guys think that MRAs are guys who can’t get laid. Why on earth would we want to slut shame?”

Punishment for sleeping with the wrong guys? I know that whole Eliot Rodger thing was, what, decades ago, I think, but it was pretty big news at the time. You might want to read up on it – it might help you better understand what you’re trying to criticize.

titianblue
titianblue
10 years ago

You guys think that MRAs are guys who can’t get laid. Why on earth would we want to slut shame? Doesn’t enforcing those types of sexual standards on women just make it less likely that we would get laid than if we encouraged women to have as much sex as possible?

But, Bittersweet, logic is misandry! /snark

Viscaria
Viscaria
10 years ago

Do women over 50 even exist? I’ve never seen one.

/douchebro mode

titianblue
titianblue
10 years ago

You guys have extreme cognitive dissonance.

Citation needed.

PS The irony is strong in this one!

bunnybunny
bunnybunny
10 years ago

You guys have extreme cognitive dissonance.

Omg, the smell of irony in the morning. My favorite.

I can barely stifle my laughter at the thought that you literally cannot put two and two together and see that calling a woman you don’t like a slut or a whore is a form of slut-shaming, and it is one of the MRM’s favorite activities.

1 2 3 25