Heh. I’m on my annual semi-vacation this week, and was planning on keeping my postings here fairly light. But the news waits for no one. And by “news” I mean the daily parade of ridiculousness coming from the Men’s “Human Rights” camp. So here’s a quick report on the latest bit of high irony involving A Voice for Men.
Well, I was wrong. I’ve often noted that the Men’s Rights movement in general, and A Voice for Men in particular, doesn’t actually provide any real help for any real men. Sure, as far as I can tell, precisely zero of the hundreds of thousands of dollars A Voice for Men has raised from donors over the years has gone into providing actual services for men — say, funding a hotline for troubled men or some other practical program that doesn’t primarily involve yelling at women online. But never let it be said that none of this money gods to help men.
Because, it turns out, that money has been going to help men. Or at least that subset of men that consists of one Paul Elam of Houston Texas.
After being pressed for details about A Voice for Men’s finances by anonymous commenters on Reddit, a certain Twitterer named @DavidFutrelle and a journalist from MSNBC, Elam has finally fessed up and admitted that all the money donated to his website goes directly to him. But don’t take my word for it. Here’s what Elam had to say in a post from yesterday:
Every dollar donated goes right into my pocket. I spend that money on this website and on activist efforts at my own discretion, considering the opinions of the AVFM management team that volunteers to help run this place. … I depend on the site for my living, and to do as much FTSU as possible while I am at it.
In the past, of course, Elam was a bit more, well, elusive about where the money was going, talking about the costs of paying for web hosting and stock images rather than, say, the costs of paying the mortgage of one Paul Elam. Maybe “elusive” isn’t the correct word. “Deceptive” might be more like it.
You may also recall this pitch he once made for donations (I’ve put the best parts in bold):
I am tired of seeing a comparative handful of men and women cough up the lion’s share of financial assistance when most, even some who come here every day to read and cheer on FTSU, won’t cough up five fucking dollars to help us out; who are just fine as long as none of the burden, even a trivial part of it, is on them. …
[T]he longer I am at this, the less patience I have with dead weight, those who think AVFM is a fucking source of entertainment, or a life preserver for when the tables finally, inevitably turn against them.
In a way, I feel even worse now for most of the men who will make contact with AVfM looking for that lifeline. Unless their story is one that has the potential for me to exploit and gain media attention to THE CAUSE, then all I will have for them is a link to this article.
Well, and perhaps this piece of advice.
If the system has ruined your life, join the club. You are now in the ranks of men you have ignored your whole life. My advice to you is simple. Take your fucking quietly and with grace. Expect the same compassion you have always extended to those men who wore the shoes you are now wearing.
If you want things to change, then stock up on Ramen, get cozy in your studio apartment and join us in the fight to fix this shit. Don’t ask us to help you, but rather give your life the only meaning it may have left, as someone ready and willing to turn your meager existence into helping others who have been similarly screwed over.
In other words, Elam told troubled men turning to his site for help that they should stock up on Ramen noodles — and pay his bills. Oh, and on several occasions he’s boasted about taking donations from people taking the money from their unemployment checks.
As for the other people who put in so much time and energy at his site? As far as I can figure it from Elam’s evasive post yesterday, they earn nothing but a “thanks.”
At the end of each day, even with the incredible levels of help I get from people like Dean Esmay, David King, Al Martin and every one of the incredible people who work at AVFM, I am still target number one. I am a target for feminists posing as concerned MHRAs, yellow hacks like David Futrelle, and a target for many in the media who would love nothing better than to publish my personal financial information after putting their disgusting spin on it.
As you might have gathered from that quote, Elam remains indignant that anyone would even ask where the money goes.
And that goes for the money he recently raised that was supposedly earmarked to pay the security costs of AVFM’s conference. About that, he says only:
we hired four police officials (three officers and one supervisor) for coverage of the entire event and also hired a local attorney, paying his retainer in advance. We also had to engage our regular attorney, and have not yet been billed for their services.
In effect, we spent the money raised on precisely what we said we would spend it on, and have set aside what little remained for the next conference.
Really? According to costhelper.com, off-duty police officers generally cost $40-60 an hour; this Sheriff’s department puts the costs at $27-$31 an hour for each of its officers, including administrative fees. Even assuming that AVFM paid at the top of this range — $60 an hour — it would have cost them only $7200 to pay for four officers working ten hours each of the three days of the conference.
The amount that AVFM might have paid for legal fees depends on how much their lawyers charge per hour, and how many hours they worked. Assuming each lawyer charged $200 per hour and worked thirty hours over the three days of the conference — which I highly doubt — the cost for their legal assistance would have added up to $12,000. If AVFM actually paid even half that for legal fees I will eat my cats.
Even with these extremely generous assumptions, AVFM would have paid out only a little over $19,000 for security and legal fees. AVFM raised more than $30,000 for “security.”
In the interest of full disclosure, I should note that I also ask readers for donations. But I’ve always made clear that aside from donations specifically earmarked for other things the money goes to me. (And the cats.) And I don’t demand that donors pay me $20,000 per quarter — $80,000 a year — on top of whatever donations come in between the quarterly fundraisers, not to mention special “security” fundraisers.
I’m very grateful to those who donate to me — and indeed to everyone who’s contributed time and effort and knowledge and artistic skills to help the site — but I take in only a fraction of what Elam evidently takes in. And I don’t ask for money from those who are themselves broke.
In the comments on AVFM, the regulars are of course rallying around Elam. Then again, I can’t imagine anyone critical of what he does with the money would remain unbanned there for long.
Something tells me he’ll find a way out of this if it ever even happens. He’ll either blame the feminist government for stealing his hard-earned money (and he will see no irony in this and possibly neither will many of his followers) or TRIGGER WARNING MAYBE he’ll resort to violence against the IRS/government (ala Andrew Stack).
Yet if you read the comments on his page in reference to this article, his followers are taking up for him and actually saying how they plan to send him more money. I love to see sheep get stripped of their money so willingly…and they think feminists are dumb? Right.
I think caipirinha might be the best shot at comforting your friend.
You can also tell them there’s still a chance for Argentina to win the cup, thus keeping it within Latin American countries, and just next door to Brazil.
But don’t expect them to shrug and say “well, close enough” 😛
Wood-y! Woodywoodywoodywoody Wood-y! Here boy! C’mon! Here boy!
I too have a sads that Woody is away from his computer. Up until now he’s been so reliable! Maybe his owner had to take him to the vet for a check up.
Hi peep, back after a long hiatus, I’m not at all surprised this revolting creep is in it for the money. Most of the ultra right wing sites in the us seem to be focused on the $ they can get from rubes. Let’s not forget Tammy Baker and her hubby and their religious fraud.
Sir Bodsworth,
No. It’s not like we don’t know what will be said:
Woody (to spare him the effort): “But Paul Elam is noble and an upright person, and I trust him to put my money to honorable causes. Stop saying he’s a con man! Whine!”
Rest of us: “Shut up, Woody.”
@ contrapangloss — hey, you could have put up a spoiler warning!
Canadian … Cock.org? Really? But really, though? That sounds like the name of a parody MRA group. Do they sell merchandise that says Canadian COCK with silly penis pun mottos? No, I’m not going to believe a serious organization named themselves Canadian COCK. God, if you’re going to pretend to give a shit about victims of domestic violence, you should at least pretend to take yourselves seriously.
Oh my god, I just noticed that their tag line is “COCK, is it in you?” Is this even real? It’s too stupid to be real.
Someone posting as Mens Rights Sydney is one of several Elam defenders who made sweet love to false equivalency by bringing up noted fake game girl and feminist sucubus Anita Saaarkeeeeesiaaaan. ::boo! hiss! more boos! even more hiss!::
I know MRAs traditionally distance themselves from self-awareness, but even factoring in their tone deafness I’m still almost amazed that they aren’t going to let this go. While references to Sarkeesian and Big Red are dog whistles to a hardcore group of dolts on the internet, most people outside that bubble have no idea what there talking about or see how ridiculous their feminist villian mythology is. Throw in Pizzey’s not murdered dog to form a unholy trinity of meaningless non-controversies. They really need to come to terms with the fact that they can’t come up with a feminist of note who’s as shitty a person as Elam yet remains a revered figurehead.
To be fair, AVFM -did- donate $2000 to the VFW venue where they held the conference.
So let’s see. $80,000 yearly donation income plus ~$30,000 “security” fundraising, plus “250” attendees paying about $200 a pop for another $50,000…that is $160,000 total for yearly income plus conference income…
Paul has donated a whopping 1.25% of AVFM income to a cause other than his own pocket/website/ego.
Activism!
John Hembling aka John the Otter is a shit bag and noted fabulist, so I’m going to go ahead and assume he doesn’t really put a lot of effort and funds into selflessly helping other men. It would be nice if this hotline wasn’t bullshit, but if you take a look at the articles on this site about him it’s pretty clear he’s a egocentric charlatan. Hell, even the reddit MRAs don’t take that asshat seriously anymore.
Has anyone tried calling that COCKline number to see if it even still exists and is staffed by anyone? I wouldn’t recommend keeping them occupied with a long call, just in case it (a) is real and (b) actually has any callers, but it might be interesting to check it out.
On the other hand, I definitely wouldn’t want to expose my cell phone number to these notorious doxxers.so maybe that isn’t the greatest idea…
@cloudiah: if I lived in that area, I totally would.
@contrapangloss
You forgot that Woody & Paul (and Dean and so on) are on a first name basis. Woody would be so offended that you implied he’d have to use Elam’s surname since they’re so very close.
No wait, they’re not close, that’s a little mangina-y. They’re tight. /s
My husband asked why I’m at my computer snickering, so I tried to explain the whole tangled ball of yarn. The situation is even more ludicrous when you say it out loud.
Honestly, I don’t think that Elam’s followers are going to be too worried. Perhaps there are a naive few who donate because they genuine think it helps someone. But for most, the deal is they give Elam money, he tells them that it’s okay for them to act like total arseholes.
What the IRS thinks about this on the other hand…
C/N: Horrible puns & gross sexual innuendo
The susbscription to their email mailing list service is called “C.O.C.K. in Your In-Box”
email mailing list service?
Go home PJ, you’re drunk.
Ah HA! The dark secret is out: money donated to wehuntedthemammoth.com is directly making the global scourge of excess cat fur WORSE!
Elam freaking out over a few questions from a MSNBC reporter.
You know someone who isn’t a rage-filled paranoid crank would see questions about AVfM’s budget and how many paid staffers it has as a pretty run of the mill journalistic inquiry. Does he really think Adam Serwer is trying bring him down? Style points for publishing Serwer’s email with the reporter’s phone number not redacted. Stay classy Paul.
http://www.donotlink.com/framed?55456
YES!
And the real mission of the mods is to smother trolls by sending cat furs into teh interwebs.
May I send some excess cat fur to the mods? Jade has turned into a shedmonster since the temperature went up.
@Viscaria “Touché, Doug. So how many tens of thousands of dollars do you think it has cost AVfM (by which I mean, personal accounts of Paul Elam) to run a series of articles 9 months ago and to run a hotline?”
I don’t know, but that’s not all that AVfM does. Futrelle only covers a fraction of it.
“I’m granting you, for the sake of argument, that either of these has actually been helpful to anyone — which I sincerely doubt.”
Seriously, go read Tara Palmatier’s series that I referenced above. Also, AVfM has done a series called “going mental” which you can read about here http://www.shrink4men.com/2014/03/19/going-mental-with-dr-tara-palmatier-and-paul-elam-abusive-women-smart-men-bad-choices/
@sparky
“Actually, Doug Spoonwood, it is that simple. Unless you’re calling Paul Elam a liar:
….”
No, it’s not that simple.
Futrelle said ” Sure, as far as I can tell, precisely zero of the hundreds of thousands of dollars A Voice for Men has raised from donors over the years has gone into providing actual services for men — say, funding a hotline for troubled men or some other practical program that doesn’t primarily involve yelling at women online.””
The hotline constituted an *example* of how men could get helped. One could also mention the Vladek Filler case or the ongoing Nicholas Alahverdian case where certain men have tried to get helped by AVfM in the Alahverdian case or have actually gotten helped in the case of Vladek Filler.
“Are you seriously saying Elam doesn’t actually pocket the donations when he said he did?”
No, I’m not. Paul Elam takes the money and *then* he decides what to do with it. Just because he first takes the money doesn’t mean that it stays in his pocket.
“Why would he lie about that and make himself look bad?”
I’m pretty sure you’ve excluded the case of him using money that he has pocketed in ways later on to help men. My position here is not that he’s doing as much as he should, but it doesn’t really come as defensible to say that Paul Elam has done absolutely nothing for no one besides himself.
“Why doesn’t Elam take at least some of the donations and help find a domestic violence shelter for men?”
Do you know what Paul Elam does with the money once he has it? Because he may well have some sort of investment in someone trying to set up such a shelter. I know that Dean Esmay donated money to Kristina Hansen when she was *claiming* that she would set up such a shelter. No, that doesn’t mean he is doing such with the money, but you simply don’t know that he’s not doing such, nor doesn’t have such plans to do so in the future.
“If Hembling and Davison are running a hotline, why not throw some money their way?”
Maybe Paul Elam is doing such. Again, do you know what Paul Elam does with the money once it’s in his pocket?
@Ugh
“I’m truly curious about how much time and money Doug thinks it takes to post an article you didn’t write on your webpage.”
I don’t think about such things. I don’t have any idea.
“Or how much help an article that is entirely whining about the lack of support, while providing no links to free resources, actually is for DV victims.”
I didn’t make any claims about what sort of help *that particular* article of Paul Elam is making.
@katz
“Oh boy, you’re paying him $80,000 a year to spend one month posting about men’s issues on a blog. (Isn’t he supposed to be posting about men’s issues all the time?)”
No, I’m not paying him such. I actually do find him talking and writing about men’s issues MUCH of the time.
“And dare I ask how much Paul/AVFM paid Diana Davison and John Hembling to run that hotline?””
Sure you can ask. That doesn’t mean you’ll get an answer for the simple reason that I don’t know.
@grumpycatisagirl
“Actually now that you’ve brought this to my attention and I’ve looked at the Web site I have an even lower opinion of them, Doug. This kind of thing is the OPPOSITE of help for male abuse victims.”
I don’t believe Diana and John claimed that most of their articles were written in such a way to specifically help male abuse victims. I’m pretty sure that’s what the hotline is for.