Sometimes I hunt the misogyny, sometimes it wanders up right up to me and says hello.
Today’s post is an example of the latter. Below, a slightly edited comment that someone left for me this morning. It’s a response to a post of mine about a dreadful post on Return of Kings in which a fellow calling himself Billy Chubbs argued, with absolutely no evidence, that a recent high school shooter was driven to murder because of his “probable sexual frustration,” Chubbs went on to argue that young women are “selfish” because they don’t have sex with guys they’re not attracted to.
Anyway, my new commenter – posting under the name “whogoesthere?” – thinks that I and the other commenters here were being too hard on Chubbs’ “very good argument.” And so he deposited this giant rant, which in many ways is even scarier than Chubbs’ original.
He’s a tad verbose, so I’ve trimmed out some stuff that isn’t relevant to his general, er, thesis. And I’ve also taken the liberty of adding a few paragraph breaks and bolding a few of the best (i.e. worst) bits.
When men don’t get the women they want they turn to violence.
Not a good start here, because this just isn’t true. In this case, the phrase “not all men” is, for once, appropriate. Most men don’t get violent when they’re turned down.
This is established all over the animal kingdom and offers a good example about how it applies to humans, that snotty girls who keep their sexual treasures to all but a few males cause the remaining males to snap. …
Animals do all sorts of things that humans don’t do, and we can’t always learn from their behavior or assume that it relates to our own lives.
Or maybe the Evo Psych crew is just looking at the wrong animals. When banana slugs can’t find a partner to have sex with, they simply fertilize themselves. There’s a lesson here, I think, for the angry incels of the world: you can’t always get what you want, and when you can’t, sex with yourself is better than murder.
High school is a massively sexually charged winner take all environment. … Today’s high school is basically an ongoing audition for a porno video and the guys and girls who don’t make the cut can only sit at home and masturbate.
wat
It’s demeaning and hits a major blow to a person’s sexual identity to not be invited to frolic with the beautiful people.
Somehow most people, regardless of gender, manage to survive even if they’re not frolicking with Charlize Theron and/or Channing Tatum.
I’m sorry but almost no men go on wild shooting rampages if they have a beautiful female in their keep.
In their keep?! Also, no. Charles Manson was surrounded by beautiful young women. Yet he orchestrated multiple grisly murders.
The only guys that do so are bank robbers and thieves, generally guys at a later stage of life more fixated on money.
wat
Human beings naturally assess the amount of sex going around them and judge themselves in relationship to the amount and type of sex others are getting.
You know, you can’t actually tell how much and what kind of sex someone is having just by looking at them. Yes, there will always be people in the world having more sex with you. And some of these people are having sex with people you would probably like to have sex with. There are also people who are smarter than you, funnier than you, who can play chess or kickbox better than you, who have hundreds or thousands of times more money than you do.
That’s life. Life isn’t fair.
This makes sense because from a reproductive standpoint sex is coveted, and sex with beautiful thin, young women are the most coveted. Being the first to spoil these young women sexually is viewed reproductively as a guarantee of parentage, thus this is why males instinctively covet and burn with passion for these females.
Ah, yes, it was only a matter of time until the creepy pedo-justifying Evo Psych assfacts made their appearance. Not all men “burn with passion” in their pants for virginal high school girls.
This is why we have “morality” which is in its essence is a promise not to flaunt or indulge in sex moreso than the lowest man or woman in your tribe. This is what is meant when people say “morality went out the window.” They mean someone with more sexual prowess is openly indulging in sex and broadcasting it to stimulate the jealousy of the underclasses.
I’m pretty sure that’s not what people mean when they say “morality went out the window.”
This teen killed people cause he thought that beautiful girls were out of reach. The high school environment merely rubbed it in his face. Yes drugs to treat ADD might’ve eroded many of the impulse control functions in the teen, but the rage against the high school was still the gasoline.
[citation needed]
He might’ve had a picture or two taken with a girl next to him, but oftentimes those high school girls lie and simply eat up the male’s offerings without granting sexual access, but grant it to a random stud.
How dare young women choose who to have sex with, and who not to!
I’m not saying the girl he killed deserved it, it’s only that when you are in that frame of mind you cannot tell who is having more sex than others and you simply fill in the gaps with rage.
Wait, so if she had turned him down he would have been justified in killing her?
The beautiful girl simply represented everything that the teen couldn’t get. The steady love and wild sex of a valuable young girl.
Yeah, I think you’re confusing high school with porn again. His rampage lasted roughly a minute and a half. He shot her because she was there.
All the other theories posted on this site seem comical, self-righteous and weirdly off-point. It’s like you’re assessing the situation as an asexual senior citizen or righteous prude.
Not a lot of “prudes” here. Just people who find the “women need to have sex with ‘nice guys’ or these ‘nice gys’ will kill you all” to be a somewhat problematic argument.
Generally men want sex with young thin beauties who validate their existence.
Some men do. But most men, among those who are sexually attracted to women, aren’t as neurotically fixated on this small slice of the female demographic – women in their teens and early twenties who are somehow both virginal and sexually “wild” – as manosphere men seem to be. And most people don’t base their entire self-worth on whether or not they’re having sex with beautiful people.
Some men prefer women older than them. Some like women who are fat. Plenty of men don’t fixate on a particular physical type and are attracted to all sorts of different women. Believe it or not, whogoesthere, there are lots of men who are more interested in what’s in a woman’s head than they are in whether or not she matches up with some particular checklist of physical attributes.
If society removes all of the social pathways to attaining such a beauty, such as making prostitution illegal, increasing shame for men who seek sex, rewarding females and males called manginas who identify and mock the sex seekers and so on… this will lead to depression in men and all of the behaviors surrounding it, including shootings. Sounds pretty much like a logical line of reasoning to me.
And that’s the problem. It’s not actually a logical line of reasoning at all. It’s more like a sort of blackmail.
Men don’t kill women because they can’t have “the steady love and wild sex of a valuable young girl.” Sometimes men kill women because they feel entitled to have sex with these “valuable young girls” and become bitter and enraged when they can’t find a “valuable young girl” who agrees with them on this particular point.
It’s not the lack of “sexual access” that’s the problem. It’s the notion that your desire for “sexual access” means more than the right of that person to say “no.” It’s the notion that society has done you wrong because you can’t (at least at the moment) get laid. It’s the idea that your desire to have sex with a particular kind of woman somehow trumps the right of other people to live.
I mean, what the fucking fuck.
Oh, by the way, there’s no evidence that the shooter in question – Karl Halverson Pierson – was motivated by sexual frustration. His intended target was the school librarian, who is also the school’s debate coach. Pierson was obsessed with debate, and had some sort of grudge against the coach.
Marinerachel, seconding – that’s not creepy, that’s great!
Oh, trivia: I did some of those “Which character are you in X film” quizzes today.
I am Gandalf, Princess Leia and Captain Kirk.
I rock.
Argh.
My friends are having a party, like a raise the roof, watch the sun come up, stay for breakfast, don’t forget to tip the performers, everybody dance now, party and I cannot go.
There will be cigarettes and if I go, I will smoke. If I smoke, I will hate myself.
There will be other parties.
I will not always have to stay away from temptation.
I am a grown up and I can skip one little, awesome party full of awesome people.
I don’t need to get dolled up and frolic with abandon.
I’m fine.
I’m strong.
I like having healthy lungs.
I’m pretty sure I’ve skinny dipped enough for one lifetime.
Grown up, that’s what I am.
Yep, gonna make responsible choices.
Gonna…do…responsible stuff.
*high pitched whining noises*
Yet another contradiction. He doesn’t want to get married because wives apparently are materialistic and cost a lot of money. Yet he when he gets rich he wants date young attractive women by spending lots of money on them. Wat? It would probably be more financially prudent to be in a double income no kids marriage than it would to spend lavishly to date young women.
@Lea
I am jealous that you get invited to parties like that, even if you can’t go to this one.
And yes, with those kinds of friends, there will always be more parties.
Well, he needs to be able to pump and dump, you see, because women get all ugly so quickly and just gross a chap of sensitive tastes out completely. It’s harder to do that with a wife than with a string of one-night stands (not that he’d be likely to get one-night stands anyway, and if he did, it wouldn’t be him doing the dumping).
Ha, that reminds me a true story (actually true story, not trolly assfax true story):
Mr. FM was in the Army when we got married, and he deployed about nine months after our wedding. When he got back we decided to celebrate with a long weekend (undfreeland is clutching his chest in horror) in Orlando. We did a theme park, went to see some natural stuff, and ended up going clubbing on Saturday night (the thumping sound you heard was undfreeland keeling over from such flagrant waste of money).
The club in particular was maaaybe half full when we got there at eleven. We danced a little, then found a place to sit. I offered to go get drinks, since Mr. FM was still a little jet-lagged and I wanted to be nice.
I was waiting by the bar when I heard someone behind me announce “Ahhhh! There’s nothing like a good piss!”
I of course needed to see who thought it was necessary to voice this opinion out loud in a night club. The dude I saw when I turned around was basically who kittehserf described above.^
“The only thing better than a good piss,” he continued, fixing me with a Blue Steel smolder, “is driving my Jag. It’s an UltraFancyPants Model with SuperAwesome Upgrades [he told me the actual specs, but I can’t remember anything but the Jaguar part. And I was kicking myself for falling for the pissing thing.]
He monologued at me about his job (finance!) and his place (in Miami! DIRECTLY ON THE BEACH, as it turns out!) until I got my drinks at the bar. He then finally thought to ask my name. So I told him.
“And what’s got you out tonight, Flying Mouse?”
I’ve experienced very few things more satisfying than telling this guy, who used a comment about peeing to get my attention, “Oh, my husband wanted to come here! He just got home from Iraq, he was over there for a year with a Special Forces unit. We just wanted to have a nice time and take his mind off things for a while!”
Needless to say that old tanned taught finance dude peeled off right quick after that. But not before he told me to thank my husband for his service 🙂
Congrats for your birthday Kittehs. Congrats for your aniversary LBT (and well done for your magazine).
Also, the songs that have been composed on this thread have been awesome. 🙂
I am 100% behind the yummy dinner/cake/lunch discussions. I am getting delicious dinner ideas. Mmmmmmm.
To add to the food descriptions, for lunch I had salad (creamy sauce, lettuce and cherry tomatos), followed by cold noodles, sesame seeds and rocket, with a big slice of tomato.
Flying Mouse, that was great. Thank you for sharing it.
I know, right? That’s why Mr. FM, since he’s such a super-rich middle-aged player and needs to guard his assets, drew up a very fair prenup for us before we decided to get hitched. We both get exactly what we need to start over again. He gets the car, the house, and the money. I get my makeup bag, a push-up bra, some Spanx, my sexy shoes (not the unsexy ones, they stay at the house in case his new girlfriend needs to slip into something comfy), and enough cash to call a cab. That may seem kind of lopsided (I get brand-new Spanx!), but we all know that men needs lots of assets in order to “pull” the kind of quality twenty-somethings they deserve. All I have to do is convince some poor sucker that I’m 25 and then move in before he realizes what happened. Then all my new furniture and iPhone needs are taken care of, baby!
Thanks, Kim. I’m lucky to have such fun people in my life. they’re good people too. I love them.
I think I can keep the Hot Mess Express home at least this once.
But holy Mother Teresa on the hood of a Mercedes Benz, I wish I didn’t have to.
Addiction can eat shit and die.
Flying Mouse, you are on fire! You keep cracking me up!
Thanks, Robert and Lea!
Happy Birthday, Kittehserf!
Marinerachel, good luck with the jumping of the bones.
How do you like Attack on Titan Lea? I ask mostly because I really couldn’t get into the show. A combination of a cast I hated, bad pacing, and a central plot that just didn’t grip me. If you’re interested in Action anime I suggest Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure or Hunter X Hunter, both of which I feel are leagues ahead of Attack on Titan.
Lea, I’m sad for you, too. That party sounds like it will be a lot of fun. I’m glad you’ve got more willpower than I do.
@kittehserf: It’s your birthday? I hope you and Louis have a great time!
@Lea: That’s too bad about the party. I hope you can find something else nice to do that night.
@ everyone else:
Are we talking about delicious food? A couple nights ago we had some relatives visiting from Texas (I live in Alaska), so my dad cooked up some salmon that my neighbor had caught and given to us. Much appreciated by the guests, and now we’ve got lots of leftover fish. It makes surprisingly good sandwiches.
Aw! Isn’t adorable how the nasty widdle troll thinks no one else could possibly love living frugally.
Oh, my!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY KITTEHS!!!
May it be wonderful (just like you).
I’m not surprised contrapangloss, undfreeland seems to feel that conspicuous consumption will attract wom- er autonomous Sex Dolls to him. I myself would be happy with only a few rooms as long as they were comfortable and secure.
Yum! I have plans to turn some soba noodles into a peanutty cold salad thing sometime next week. I approve of your lunch 🙂
Everyone else’s meals are lining up with my own menu planning – must be the hivemind syncing again.
Hey! Another Alaskan!
::waves madly::
(Wait, did we have this conversation before? Or are there more of us?)
Oh, it’s kittehs’ birthday today? WHOOT! HAPPY BIRTHDAY! 😀
Wait… if und thinks there’s no point in spending money on women/sex and presumably disdains materialism, then what the hell is he doing with all the money he’s
earningstealing from dead family members?So with the exception of good looking, in shape genius man, ya’ll are old?
hahhahahha.
Oh sonny, you have no clue.
But I’m glad you think I’m a genius. (what with being in shape and good looking).
And what you can’t believe… well All the Libraries of the world can’t contain your inabilities.
As to the “Old” thing… hrmn… I just got married. My last long term partner (of a decade) was 12 years my junior (I was 33 at the time). I spent a lot of time with her friends while she was finishing school (6 years for her AA/AS/BS/MA degrees). I’d say I saw how those people you are disparaging live. I also have young friends (though young is a relative term) and have had girlfriends in the upper twenties/lower thirties in the recent past.
I get it. As I said, the common theme I see to your problems… is you.