Sometimes I hunt the misogyny, sometimes it wanders up right up to me and says hello.
Today’s post is an example of the latter. Below, a slightly edited comment that someone left for me this morning. It’s a response to a post of mine about a dreadful post on Return of Kings in which a fellow calling himself Billy Chubbs argued, with absolutely no evidence, that a recent high school shooter was driven to murder because of his “probable sexual frustration,” Chubbs went on to argue that young women are “selfish” because they don’t have sex with guys they’re not attracted to.
Anyway, my new commenter – posting under the name “whogoesthere?” – thinks that I and the other commenters here were being too hard on Chubbs’ “very good argument.” And so he deposited this giant rant, which in many ways is even scarier than Chubbs’ original.
He’s a tad verbose, so I’ve trimmed out some stuff that isn’t relevant to his general, er, thesis. And I’ve also taken the liberty of adding a few paragraph breaks and bolding a few of the best (i.e. worst) bits.
When men don’t get the women they want they turn to violence.
Not a good start here, because this just isn’t true. In this case, the phrase “not all men” is, for once, appropriate. Most men don’t get violent when they’re turned down.
This is established all over the animal kingdom and offers a good example about how it applies to humans, that snotty girls who keep their sexual treasures to all but a few males cause the remaining males to snap. …
Animals do all sorts of things that humans don’t do, and we can’t always learn from their behavior or assume that it relates to our own lives.
Or maybe the Evo Psych crew is just looking at the wrong animals. When banana slugs can’t find a partner to have sex with, they simply fertilize themselves. There’s a lesson here, I think, for the angry incels of the world: you can’t always get what you want, and when you can’t, sex with yourself is better than murder.
High school is a massively sexually charged winner take all environment. … Today’s high school is basically an ongoing audition for a porno video and the guys and girls who don’t make the cut can only sit at home and masturbate.
wat
It’s demeaning and hits a major blow to a person’s sexual identity to not be invited to frolic with the beautiful people.
Somehow most people, regardless of gender, manage to survive even if they’re not frolicking with Charlize Theron and/or Channing Tatum.
I’m sorry but almost no men go on wild shooting rampages if they have a beautiful female in their keep.
In their keep?! Also, no. Charles Manson was surrounded by beautiful young women. Yet he orchestrated multiple grisly murders.
The only guys that do so are bank robbers and thieves, generally guys at a later stage of life more fixated on money.
wat
Human beings naturally assess the amount of sex going around them and judge themselves in relationship to the amount and type of sex others are getting.
You know, you can’t actually tell how much and what kind of sex someone is having just by looking at them. Yes, there will always be people in the world having more sex with you. And some of these people are having sex with people you would probably like to have sex with. There are also people who are smarter than you, funnier than you, who can play chess or kickbox better than you, who have hundreds or thousands of times more money than you do.
That’s life. Life isn’t fair.
This makes sense because from a reproductive standpoint sex is coveted, and sex with beautiful thin, young women are the most coveted. Being the first to spoil these young women sexually is viewed reproductively as a guarantee of parentage, thus this is why males instinctively covet and burn with passion for these females.
Ah, yes, it was only a matter of time until the creepy pedo-justifying Evo Psych assfacts made their appearance. Not all men “burn with passion” in their pants for virginal high school girls.
This is why we have “morality” which is in its essence is a promise not to flaunt or indulge in sex moreso than the lowest man or woman in your tribe. This is what is meant when people say “morality went out the window.” They mean someone with more sexual prowess is openly indulging in sex and broadcasting it to stimulate the jealousy of the underclasses.
I’m pretty sure that’s not what people mean when they say “morality went out the window.”
This teen killed people cause he thought that beautiful girls were out of reach. The high school environment merely rubbed it in his face. Yes drugs to treat ADD might’ve eroded many of the impulse control functions in the teen, but the rage against the high school was still the gasoline.
[citation needed]
He might’ve had a picture or two taken with a girl next to him, but oftentimes those high school girls lie and simply eat up the male’s offerings without granting sexual access, but grant it to a random stud.
How dare young women choose who to have sex with, and who not to!
I’m not saying the girl he killed deserved it, it’s only that when you are in that frame of mind you cannot tell who is having more sex than others and you simply fill in the gaps with rage.
Wait, so if she had turned him down he would have been justified in killing her?
The beautiful girl simply represented everything that the teen couldn’t get. The steady love and wild sex of a valuable young girl.
Yeah, I think you’re confusing high school with porn again. His rampage lasted roughly a minute and a half. He shot her because she was there.
All the other theories posted on this site seem comical, self-righteous and weirdly off-point. It’s like you’re assessing the situation as an asexual senior citizen or righteous prude.
Not a lot of “prudes” here. Just people who find the “women need to have sex with ‘nice guys’ or these ‘nice gys’ will kill you all” to be a somewhat problematic argument.
Generally men want sex with young thin beauties who validate their existence.
Some men do. But most men, among those who are sexually attracted to women, aren’t as neurotically fixated on this small slice of the female demographic – women in their teens and early twenties who are somehow both virginal and sexually “wild” – as manosphere men seem to be. And most people don’t base their entire self-worth on whether or not they’re having sex with beautiful people.
Some men prefer women older than them. Some like women who are fat. Plenty of men don’t fixate on a particular physical type and are attracted to all sorts of different women. Believe it or not, whogoesthere, there are lots of men who are more interested in what’s in a woman’s head than they are in whether or not she matches up with some particular checklist of physical attributes.
If society removes all of the social pathways to attaining such a beauty, such as making prostitution illegal, increasing shame for men who seek sex, rewarding females and males called manginas who identify and mock the sex seekers and so on… this will lead to depression in men and all of the behaviors surrounding it, including shootings. Sounds pretty much like a logical line of reasoning to me.
And that’s the problem. It’s not actually a logical line of reasoning at all. It’s more like a sort of blackmail.
Men don’t kill women because they can’t have “the steady love and wild sex of a valuable young girl.” Sometimes men kill women because they feel entitled to have sex with these “valuable young girls” and become bitter and enraged when they can’t find a “valuable young girl” who agrees with them on this particular point.
It’s not the lack of “sexual access” that’s the problem. It’s the notion that your desire for “sexual access” means more than the right of that person to say “no.” It’s the notion that society has done you wrong because you can’t (at least at the moment) get laid. It’s the idea that your desire to have sex with a particular kind of woman somehow trumps the right of other people to live.
I mean, what the fucking fuck.
Oh, by the way, there’s no evidence that the shooter in question – Karl Halverson Pierson – was motivated by sexual frustration. His intended target was the school librarian, who is also the school’s debate coach. Pierson was obsessed with debate, and had some sort of grudge against the coach.
Hopefully David will check his inbox soon, wewereemergencies. He’s had at least two emails about this lackwit.
I’m having a good day! I picked up a couple days’ casual work at my old workplace this week, and today my fellow worker said he’s bought a bit of cake ‘cos it’s my birthday tomorrow, which was such a sweet thing to do. Afternoon tea for the win!
Life is peachy! I’m drinking strawberry green tea and trying to decide what to make for dinner, and emailing Mr C cute things since he’s still at work. My cat is curled on the the kitchen table basking in a sunbeam, so it seems to be a good day for the Furrinati too.
Kittehs that does sound like a good day! I’m also looking for work atm (I’m on 5 weeks holidays so I thought I should get a job) but nothing’s come up yet. Happy birthday for tomorrow if I don’t “see” you!
cassandrakitty life does indeed sound pretty great for you. I really want a Furrinati to cuddle – it’s cold (7C this morning) and sunny and I’m catching up on Orphan Black. What’s the time difference between here and your place? It’s 11:20 am here.
This is so stupid. There is a huge financial advantage to living in a dual income house. You get way more disposable income when you only pay half the bills, half the rent and half the cost of appliances.
It’s almost 6:30 pm here. Furrinati just woke up and came running over, apparently she thought I was doing something interesting.
Doing well, thanks for asking, wewereemergencies!
We had a lamb and mushroom ragout over polenta for dinner tonight. The kids weren’t crazy for the ragout, but they were glad to know that this the last of the lamb (it’t meal #3 from a roast I made on Sunday). I made the polenta in the oven, which was fun. It didn’t come out as creamy as when it’s done on the stove top, but it was miles easier. Fair trade-off IMO.
I think he’s on moderation now, so hopefully that will teach him to check himself before he wrecks himself and takes somebody down with him. If we’re still taking bids for a troll challenge, I vote that he provide us with an anthropomorphized animal picture. It will be entertaining for us and educational for him, since he doesn’t seem to grasp what the word means.
Ye gods, my typos today. *this is the last* *it’s meal #3*
undfreeland if you’ve provided anything it isn’t “insight” or “wisdom”, or anything you’ve said when you’re “telling it like it is (not)”, it’s perspective. Your awfulness is both a warning and a reassurance, despite my problems I’m nowhere near as hard up as you.
I’m autistic, I’ve had to struggle with social cues and communication for my entire life. While I uually have no problems interacting with people now, I still find it seriously hard to build long-term relationships, I have real problems being proactive interpersonally, and I’m utterly lost in so many situations. It’s not helped that I’m miserable with names and faces, I simply cannot commit a person’s name or appearance to memory unless I’ve spent hours with them. I’ve spent my life as a chronically lonely person. I’ve never had a girlfriend, and really don’t process physical attractiveness, to the point that I’ve seriously questioned whether I’m asexual (and I’m still not sure the answer.) I genuinely feel bereft and directionless, without the drive or ambition to better myself or improve my lot in life. I spend most nights in bed grappling with my deep seated self-loathing. And when I look on you undfreeland I realize how much worse I could be.
I see women as human beings. I recognize that the world is not all as it is within my solipsistic bubble. I have a family who loves and supports me. I have a few long-time friends I still interact with. I’m trying to be open, I’m trying to find an opportunity, I’m trying to do something with my life besides sit around playing games and browsing the internet all day. When I read about your miserable, awful, empty life I realize how many gifts I’ve been given. Hearing about your hollowness makes me realize just how far I really am from the bottom. Thanks undfreeland.
Lamb and mushroom! Never had ragout or polenta, but lamb and mushroom sounds so good.
Well you were thinking about dinner (presumably) for you, rather then zie cassandrakitty. Can’t have that!
Flying Mouse, yum! I had chicken and chorizo homemade pie a couple of nights ago and it was really good. And then a Thai red curry last night, which I get leftovers for lunch today! Winter means such good meals.
So true about winter meals. One of the many things I dislike about summer is having to eat cold meals or at least ones that don’t mean heating up the kitchen. When you’re not a fan of salads, summer eating is a pain.
Summer does mean you get to spend more time with friends and family, in my experience, and there’s something to be said for simple meals on beautiful days outdoors. But yes summer foods are generally a lot more… bland I guess?
Would you eat Middle Eastern food if it isn’t spicy? There are tons of dishes from the Levant, North Africa, and so on that are intended to be eaten at room temperature that aren’t salads.
I am…. so down with the pusseh cartel.
Yeah, but getting them here’s one issue – Coles and Woolworths where I live have pretty limited ranges – and getting Mum to try them is another. If you think I’m unadventurous with food, you ain’t seen nothin’ yet!
I’m with you on that one, kittehserf! I’m not a fan of grilling, but I find myself firing the darned thing up a lot these days (I’m in the southern U.S.) just so that I can avoid having oven throw heat into the entire house. I got lucky tonight and was able to fit the polenta casserole into my toaster oven, which doesn’t radiate anywhere near as much. But I’ll do what I can to avoid too many salad dinners. I’m indifferent to them myself, and the rest of the family will revolt if they appear as a main dish more than once a week.
Those both sound amazing. I have shrimp curry on the menu in a few days, actually. I’m pretty excited about it, but I’m the only one. Everyone else just will just scarf the sticky rice. Maybe I can rope the little ones into helping me make dumplings or something this weekend, then they can eat some of those, too.
@kim, sure getting married means you can split bills, but it also means i’d be getting billed for someone else’s materialist crap. New furniture, a house, eating out, new phones, vacations and other useless things that most other people like to waste money on. By myself, I can save.
@kim, sure, I could split bills, but then I’d have so many more because of anther person’s materialistic garbage. A nice place, furniture, phones, eating out, vacations and other useless crap. Not to mention of they decide they want kids. Terrible idea
We had salad for dinner. I made some toasted coconut “bacon bits” as experiment. They were a hit. We’ve been drinking cold mango green tea with mango nectar rather than coffee lately. Recently we found out that eldest daughter’s bf has nor been exposed to many different kinds of food, so we’ve been having tastings. He’s picked out various things to try. He’s been very brave. So far the only things he hasn’t liked are blue cheese and smoked oysters. He loves steamed bean buns.
I’ve had my little kids making their own audiobooks. That way they read and they can hear themselves. It helps with their speech. Next we will go to the amphitheater and I’ll teach them to project. It’s funny, kids love to be loud, until they know you’re listening. We’ve been trying to expose them to different music, so they have some new CDs. So far Chuck Barry seems to be their favorite. He’s inspired some wild dancing. We’ve visited an elk & bison prairie, an animatronic dinosaur show, a fantasy themed park where the play area is a castle with actual secret passages and we plan to visit the planetarium before summer is out. Other than that I’ve just been cleaning out closets and reorganizing.
A friend of mine’s biopsy came back clear. YAY!!!!!
In a few, I’m going to watch some Attack on Titan with the hubster.
We just ate my birthday cake at work. Chocolate and hazelnut and more chocolate and SO RICH omg it’s wonderful.
More things the boy wonder doesn’t understand: people with incomes pay for their own pleasures, they don’t dump them on their spouses. (Funny how he isn’t complaining that his wife might end up paying for his materialistic crap, like his video games … yeah, totes feminist this one.)
Of course he’s also done another fine demonstration of how he doesn’t actually like people or want to talk to them: oh noes, going on a holiday with the person you married, going to dinner with them, what a horrible thought! Talking to someone before marriage about whether you want children, no, one can’t possibly do that!
Stay in your basement, genius boy. You’ll be doing the world a favour.
I ended up deciding on menudo for dinner. I’m also loving Lea’s story about exposing her daughter’s bf to new foods, since my mother played that same role in the lives of some of my friends growing up (and, in turn, many of my mother’s friends played that role for me).
I am very interested in those; I have a recipe bookmarked, but I just haven’t gotten around to them yet. Glad they passed the taste test.
That’s pretty excellent that he’s willing to be so open-minded. And really excellent of you guys to be his culinary guides.
😀
Tee-hee, those silly ladies always buy lots of things and never bring in any money of their own. It’s just like in cartoons from the 50’s or “Blondie” comic strips! undfreeland is so up-to-date and edgy.
@ undfreeland — I hear ya, buddy. When I started going out with my girlfriend, she was all like “sit in a chair” and “wear underpants” and “stop eating raw frankfurters right out of the packet” and “stop sleeping in your friend’s garage”. Chicks, eh? Next it’ll be “put some lotion on that rash” or some materialistic shit like that. So high maintenance! Fortunately I can save some money on entertainment by watching network TV, but still…