Sometimes I hunt the misogyny, sometimes it wanders up right up to me and says hello.
Today’s post is an example of the latter. Below, a slightly edited comment that someone left for me this morning. It’s a response to a post of mine about a dreadful post on Return of Kings in which a fellow calling himself Billy Chubbs argued, with absolutely no evidence, that a recent high school shooter was driven to murder because of his “probable sexual frustration,” Chubbs went on to argue that young women are “selfish” because they don’t have sex with guys they’re not attracted to.
Anyway, my new commenter – posting under the name “whogoesthere?” – thinks that I and the other commenters here were being too hard on Chubbs’ “very good argument.” And so he deposited this giant rant, which in many ways is even scarier than Chubbs’ original.
He’s a tad verbose, so I’ve trimmed out some stuff that isn’t relevant to his general, er, thesis. And I’ve also taken the liberty of adding a few paragraph breaks and bolding a few of the best (i.e. worst) bits.
When men don’t get the women they want they turn to violence.
Not a good start here, because this just isn’t true. In this case, the phrase “not all men” is, for once, appropriate. Most men don’t get violent when they’re turned down.
This is established all over the animal kingdom and offers a good example about how it applies to humans, that snotty girls who keep their sexual treasures to all but a few males cause the remaining males to snap. …
Animals do all sorts of things that humans don’t do, and we can’t always learn from their behavior or assume that it relates to our own lives.
Or maybe the Evo Psych crew is just looking at the wrong animals. When banana slugs can’t find a partner to have sex with, they simply fertilize themselves. There’s a lesson here, I think, for the angry incels of the world: you can’t always get what you want, and when you can’t, sex with yourself is better than murder.
High school is a massively sexually charged winner take all environment. … Today’s high school is basically an ongoing audition for a porno video and the guys and girls who don’t make the cut can only sit at home and masturbate.
wat
It’s demeaning and hits a major blow to a person’s sexual identity to not be invited to frolic with the beautiful people.
Somehow most people, regardless of gender, manage to survive even if they’re not frolicking with Charlize Theron and/or Channing Tatum.
I’m sorry but almost no men go on wild shooting rampages if they have a beautiful female in their keep.
In their keep?! Also, no. Charles Manson was surrounded by beautiful young women. Yet he orchestrated multiple grisly murders.
The only guys that do so are bank robbers and thieves, generally guys at a later stage of life more fixated on money.
wat
Human beings naturally assess the amount of sex going around them and judge themselves in relationship to the amount and type of sex others are getting.
You know, you can’t actually tell how much and what kind of sex someone is having just by looking at them. Yes, there will always be people in the world having more sex with you. And some of these people are having sex with people you would probably like to have sex with. There are also people who are smarter than you, funnier than you, who can play chess or kickbox better than you, who have hundreds or thousands of times more money than you do.
That’s life. Life isn’t fair.
This makes sense because from a reproductive standpoint sex is coveted, and sex with beautiful thin, young women are the most coveted. Being the first to spoil these young women sexually is viewed reproductively as a guarantee of parentage, thus this is why males instinctively covet and burn with passion for these females.
Ah, yes, it was only a matter of time until the creepy pedo-justifying Evo Psych assfacts made their appearance. Not all men “burn with passion” in their pants for virginal high school girls.
This is why we have “morality” which is in its essence is a promise not to flaunt or indulge in sex moreso than the lowest man or woman in your tribe. This is what is meant when people say “morality went out the window.” They mean someone with more sexual prowess is openly indulging in sex and broadcasting it to stimulate the jealousy of the underclasses.
I’m pretty sure that’s not what people mean when they say “morality went out the window.”
This teen killed people cause he thought that beautiful girls were out of reach. The high school environment merely rubbed it in his face. Yes drugs to treat ADD might’ve eroded many of the impulse control functions in the teen, but the rage against the high school was still the gasoline.
[citation needed]
He might’ve had a picture or two taken with a girl next to him, but oftentimes those high school girls lie and simply eat up the male’s offerings without granting sexual access, but grant it to a random stud.
How dare young women choose who to have sex with, and who not to!
I’m not saying the girl he killed deserved it, it’s only that when you are in that frame of mind you cannot tell who is having more sex than others and you simply fill in the gaps with rage.
Wait, so if she had turned him down he would have been justified in killing her?
The beautiful girl simply represented everything that the teen couldn’t get. The steady love and wild sex of a valuable young girl.
Yeah, I think you’re confusing high school with porn again. His rampage lasted roughly a minute and a half. He shot her because she was there.
All the other theories posted on this site seem comical, self-righteous and weirdly off-point. It’s like you’re assessing the situation as an asexual senior citizen or righteous prude.
Not a lot of “prudes” here. Just people who find the “women need to have sex with ‘nice guys’ or these ‘nice gys’ will kill you all” to be a somewhat problematic argument.
Generally men want sex with young thin beauties who validate their existence.
Some men do. But most men, among those who are sexually attracted to women, aren’t as neurotically fixated on this small slice of the female demographic – women in their teens and early twenties who are somehow both virginal and sexually “wild” – as manosphere men seem to be. And most people don’t base their entire self-worth on whether or not they’re having sex with beautiful people.
Some men prefer women older than them. Some like women who are fat. Plenty of men don’t fixate on a particular physical type and are attracted to all sorts of different women. Believe it or not, whogoesthere, there are lots of men who are more interested in what’s in a woman’s head than they are in whether or not she matches up with some particular checklist of physical attributes.
If society removes all of the social pathways to attaining such a beauty, such as making prostitution illegal, increasing shame for men who seek sex, rewarding females and males called manginas who identify and mock the sex seekers and so on… this will lead to depression in men and all of the behaviors surrounding it, including shootings. Sounds pretty much like a logical line of reasoning to me.
And that’s the problem. It’s not actually a logical line of reasoning at all. It’s more like a sort of blackmail.
Men don’t kill women because they can’t have “the steady love and wild sex of a valuable young girl.” Sometimes men kill women because they feel entitled to have sex with these “valuable young girls” and become bitter and enraged when they can’t find a “valuable young girl” who agrees with them on this particular point.
It’s not the lack of “sexual access” that’s the problem. It’s the notion that your desire for “sexual access” means more than the right of that person to say “no.” It’s the notion that society has done you wrong because you can’t (at least at the moment) get laid. It’s the idea that your desire to have sex with a particular kind of woman somehow trumps the right of other people to live.
I mean, what the fucking fuck.
Oh, by the way, there’s no evidence that the shooter in question – Karl Halverson Pierson – was motivated by sexual frustration. His intended target was the school librarian, who is also the school’s debate coach. Pierson was obsessed with debate, and had some sort of grudge against the coach.
OMG, I have one of those. It isn’t one of the fun ones either, like ‘eating sugary cereal whilst watching Saturday morning cartoons’ non-adult. It’s one of the ‘you’ll never be good enough, who cares that you’re 30, own your own home, graduated from 8 years of Uni, can hold down a good job and pay all your own bills? You’re still a child!’ kind. Like my dad, in in my head, judging me, forever. Like, I haven’t mowed my grass in almost a month, clearly I’m a failure at adulthood. -_-;
As per the orgasm thing, since we’re sharing, here’s my bit of sex related TMI.
I orgasm fairly easily, and so does my boyfriend, in fact we would finish so soon early in our relationship that sometimes, I wasn’t fully satisfied. He was worried that he wasn’t lasting long enough, and the anxiety made it difficult for him to get an erection at all for a while. Fast forward two years and many many very verbal and open minded sexy times later, now we have a pattern of getting the first climax out of the way quickly, then having ‘foreplay’ and other kinky sexy times of the non PIV variety for as long as it takes for him to be ready again, then we climax again! And the second time is longer and much better. The result? 1-2 hour long sexcapades. The only problem is we don’t get to do that as often as we like since we both work full time and don’t live together 🙁
People have all kinds of different sexual reactions and reaction times. The important part is having a partner (and being the kind of partner) who is willing to experiment, work on things and find something that works for both (or all!) of you.
Axolotls are more interesting than a lot of things.
PS: I think I might be the only person in the history of sex ever who has uttered the phrase “Naturally variable refractory period!” mid coitus.
That sounds delightfully familiar. Particularly the “kinky sexy times of the non PIV variety” bit.
Although we have a similar problem finding the time – in our case we do live together but we also have kids. So once a year we dump them on relatives and take an extended three-day break somewhere sophisticated and European where the ratio of sightseeing to shagging time is about 1:10.
@Argenti
I’m not sure, I looked at some pictures online and they were closest in appearance to Kuhli loaches. Weather loaches sound amazing, thanks for the new information I love learning about things like that.
Axolotls are awesome.
I haven’t been able to keep a tank in quite a while but visiting an aquarium is one of my favorite ways to spend an afternoon.
My (small) understanding on this – it was only one part of one lecture years ago – that the sorts of outcomes people have been listing as “maybe” sexual dysfunctions probably aren’t. Basically, if you and your partner/s are satisfied and getting what you need/want out of the contact, then there is no sexual dysfunction.
The main example I remember we were given was a guy seeing one of the clinical psychologists for premature ejaculation because he felt was was too quick. In the therapy session it was established that both he and his partner orgasmed fast, both were getting what they wanted out of sex, and the psychologist explained that there was no dysfunction, and gave him some information about methods to delay male orgasm if he and his partner wanted to try them.
From this, the key message I received is that context is everything.
And it was extremely difficult to write all this without using a single word that could be punned.
Did our inner jerk voices come from the same manufacturer? Because mine seems to be the same model. I wonder if we can exchange them for the “cartoons and candy for breakfast!” one? I’ll have to ask Mom if she saved the receipt, though that will be pretty awkward :
I’m pretty sure it’s going to fall outside of the standard return policy, unless you bought the extended warranty? That shit is expensive though.
And you’d be surprised how effective this can be, because a great many very attractive women have to put up with untold amounts of crude objectification and none-too-well-hidden assumptions that if she’s that good looking, her IQ must only be double-digit (you know, to provide “balance”).
Or the guy doesn’t care about her intelligence one way or the other, and is just shopping for an attractive piece of human furniture to install in his apartment. Because that’s a totally fun and rewarding relationship.
God, is the Undfreeland Show still on?
OK, at this point I’m pretty sure you’re trolling, but…
It’s not “childish”, it’s observable fact, backed up by decades of research. Of course other animals don’t have the same emotions that humans do, or the same way of expressing them, but no personalities? That’s some 19th century bullshit right there.
“Sand in your underwear?” (a modified form of “sand in your vagina”). I also like “who pissed in your cornflakes?” (which I now see everyone else has suggested)
“who got up on the wrong side of bed this morning” is a common one used in my family. I don’t know that it’s funny though.
Nobody’s mocking his lack of it or how slow it might be: he’s being mocked for calling it a chore. It’s of a piece with his general attitude. If he’d simply said “I have trouble reaching orgasm” I doubt anyone would be mocking it.
And for his apparently thinking that the only benefit of “better” sex (ie, a more attractive partner, for him) is that it’s over quicker.
He literally wants to minimize the amount of sex he’s having.
Just got the the troll’s comment about not being able to come and haven’t read the rest of the thread yet, but given his general beliefs about women, obvious lack of real world experience socializing with women. and fondness for sitting around gaming till he passes out, I have a relevant data point! Very heavy porn use can cause erectile dysfunction. There’s research about this, how exposure to porn long before any actual sex life + very heavy use can lead to unrealistic ideas about women’s bodies and what we’re likely to want to do in bed, which leads to the men in this group being either unable to get it up in the presence of a woman who isn’t perfectly lit and posed for maximum hotness and/or photoshopped to achieve the same effect or not enjoying what sex they do have, and an escalating cycle in which unrealistic expectations lead to disappointment and inability to connect sexually with a partner leads to even heavier porn use leads to the unrealistic expectations being enforced and the problems with actual sex never being addressed. This kid really sounds like one of the guys caught in that loop. Normally I’d feel a bit sorry for someone like that, but in this case nah, he’s actively choosing his own shitty life path.
He does not desire sex for it’s own sake, katz. He just needs to have it to prove he can gain the use of a beautiful young woman. The “bliss” is in acquiring something he thinks only special “quality” men have access to. It’s the status he’s chasing, not the sex.
He doesn’t believe in love or that anyone can be trusted or known. People are all mercenaries and will drain your resources. Keep in mind that his own family do nothing but insult him and any girlfriends he brings home. (Which is fine by him, because he was just using her anyway. Then she just up and ran off with another man. It must have been for the other man’s looks or money. It couldn’t be that he wasn’t fooling her into thinking he had human feelings. *eyeroll*) He tells himself he’s so callow and emotionally stunted because he’s smart and realistic. It’s not fair that his dad expects him to work. Everything should come easy to him, because reasons. Even social justice is only as good as how it helps him in some way.
The dude is a train wreck of bitterness and entitlement.
So much so that he’s enjoyed derailing this thread to school us all on “The way things are” aka “Notes from his boner”.
cassandrakitty,
He may also just be another victim of the Kung Fu Death Grip method of stroking it.
Ease up on your penis, unfreeland. You don’t actually have to choke the chicken. You can just pet it gently.
You’re welcome.
This is still going?
Has und actually gotten entertaining yet?
I’m sure there’s a completely rational and pragmatic explanation for this. One based unbiased social observations and careful use of economic theories and top psychological and anthropological research. It will be so objective and full of truth that we will gape in wonder, trying to figure out how a mere mortal could come up with something so unique and controversial.
I’m sure that if we just wait, undfreeland will come and painstakingly explain every minute detail. He hasn’t let us down on that front so far.
Wanting to own a beautiful woman in much the same way you’d own a gorgeous car is totally compatible with feminism. Why wouldn’t it be?
(Sums up thread as succinctly as possible for people just catching up now.)
Well, trolly himself isn’t that entertaining, but FlyingMouse’s list about him was. I think that belongs in the Welcome Package right next to the Big Book O’ Learnin’, and everything Pell-related.
It also sounds like anhedonia, possibly caused by depression. It’s not uncommon for depressed young men to watch porn to the point that even masturbation is boring. Lulz troll or not, Und sounds pretty darn depressed. I’d feel bad for him, except he seems so invested in his depression as proof of his superiority. It is pretty sad, actually. This girl, who like, wasn’t even good enough for him got stolen away by his “friend.” I don’t totally understand how that happened, since he describes his buddy as being better-looking and having mad aloof game — according to Adam Smith, his buddy should have been able to score someone several points better. Sounds like there was some type of market failure, perhaps caused by a local pussy cartel?
Maybe Und needs to practice actually feeling sad that he lost his gf. If only he weren’t above all human emotion.
Pussy cartel
http://image.blingee.com/images18/content/output/000/000/000/73e/698802405_45176.gif
Lea, love it! All cartels should be so cute.
If underpantsboy is so pornified he can’t get it up/orgasm and finds sex with real live people a chore, hopefully he’ll give up and stay with his porn. Win all round, that way.
RE: katz
Does anyone know any funny idioms for “Why are you acting so irritable?”
“What crawled up YOUR ass and died?” I’m positive I’ve used that one in stories before.
RE: undfreeland
I’m not too big on ethics
We’ve noticed. You know, since you say shit like using your deceased relatives as a means to buy a Real Doll. I am so relieved to know you aren’t getting laid, undfreeland. SO RELIEVED nobody else has to deal with your conceited, ethically stunted ass.
If I like what I’m seeing while I’m doing it, it’s going to easier to cum
Dear god, child. I’m a rape survivor and I daresay I had better sex than you BEFORE I’d overcome that history! That’s depressing, yo.
Like, (and this is for the rest of you Mammoths, not und) I think a lot of folks can agree I’ve gotten heavily schooled in Hard Knocks the past couple years. The homelessness, the unemployment, the poverty, the living in a closet with only two and a half walls…
But here is the thing. I’m an optimist. I didn’t used to be. I was a pessimist, back when I had money and hadn’t left my family and lived in the METAPHORICAL closet, rather than the literal one. But then good things kept happening to me, and I converted.
And not just because good things happened to me either. It’s a coping skill. I have to believe that everything will turn out okay eventually, or I would never have survived it to this age. (And even then, it was tough; during the Homeless Year, I found myself wondering whether I could endure long enough to see things get better.)
So no, this kind of cynicism is not particularly realistic or impressive to me; I mostly see it in people who don’t have much to struggle over and are kind of afraid to change that, so they keep coasting along feeling meh and vaguely discontent without knowing what it is. Pretty common at the age und is at least portraying himself as.
Oh god und hasn’t been banned yet? On the one hand yay he hasn’t said anything more obnoxious, on the other hand damn we still have to put up with him.
Anyway, how is life for my fellow mammotheers today?